


That Day Has Come

by buffy46143



Category: clexa - Fandom
Genre: Clarke + Lexa, Clexa, Endgame Clarke Griffin/Lexa, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2016-04-10
Packaged: 2018-05-28 09:36:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 109,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6324127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buffy46143/pseuds/buffy46143
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clexa: The events of 3x7 (Thirteen) happen with a twist at the end. Clarke and Lexa must navigate their duty to their people as well as their potential relationship. In this story, I attempt to resolve what it appears will go unresolved on the show (their relationship) while also wrapping up the plots of season 3 in my own way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is my attempt to rewrite the end of 3x7. The story picks up right after the shot was fired, but I’ve changed that outcome. I have not watched 3x8 and I don’t plan on watching any more season 3 episodes until this is completely posted so any events in 3x8 or beyond will not be covered here.

Chapter 1:

Her skin felt hot. She took two steps to the right and nearly collapsed before leaning back against something. No. It wasn’t something. It was someone. Her only thought was of how heat seemed to be rushing over her. It reminded her of only a few moments ago when heat rushed over her in a very different way. She’d been underneath her. They’d shared several perfect moments finally after everything they’d been through. She’d been happy. They’d smiled at each other in a way they never had before because war had always been at the forefront of their lives. Their people were always their primary concern. She had to admit it was one of the main things that attracted her to the woman she now understood she loved in a way she never thought she’d love someone. She knew they’d be parted shortly after they explored each other for the first time, but she never would have predicted that it would be this way; that they could be parted forever after everything they’d been through.

She felt arms wrap around her from behind. She heard a mix of sounds around her, but she couldn’t make them out. She knew the shooting had stopped after the bullet entered her stomach. The arms that were holding her gently tried to move her to the ground while the man with the gun started moving toward her.

“No.” She uttered mostly to herself because she was having trouble figuring out what was going on. Shock, she registered. She was in shock. “Away.” She tried to tell the man in the robes as he tossed the gun onto the floor and she watched Murphy start to grab the man from behind.

“I’ve got him.” She made out as she slouched over, guided by the arms. Murphy turned Titus around and punched him hard in the face, causing Titus to take several unexpected steps backward. Murphy ran toward the gun and picked it up, quickly aiming it in Titus’s direction.

“Not now! Help me!” She heard the woman behind her yell at Murphy.

“Just let me-“ Murphy aimed the gun at the man’s head.

“He will pay for this, but help me with Clarke!” She heard the voice behind her. “Clarke, come on. Stay with me.” It was Lexa’s voice. She was the one holding her, keeping her from slamming into the ground after having been shot by Titus. “Why did you do this?” Clarke assumed Lexa was asking Titus the question, referring to the fact that he shot her, but she realized that her voice had been lower. She was whispering in her ear. “Why did you do this? Why did you push me aside?” She asked her as Murphy kept an eye on Titus who was crouching in the corner while he also walked toward Clarke to help Lexa lift her to get her on the bed.

“I’m sorry, Heda.” Titus finally spoke up. “I meant to only-“

“You meant to kill her!” Lexa yelled in his direction after placing Clarke on the bed. She stood straight up and stared at Titus. “You better hope she survives. If not, you may just get your wish. Jus drein jus daun, Titus. That is what you wanted, isn’t it?” She asked him before leaning over Clarke and pushing her hand against her stomach hard to try to stop the bleeding. 

“Murphy, tell the men outside to get the healer.”

“What if they don’t listen to me?” Murphy rightly asked.

Lexa pulled the circle she normally had pressed against her forehead denoting that she was the Commander off and handed it to him.

“Show them this.” She ordered. “Octavia might still be in Polis. Find her. Have her send for a doctor from Arkadia.”

“My mom.” Clarke offered.

“Tell Octavia the kill order is off.” Lexa looked from Murphy to Clarke. “Everything is off right now.”

“I’m on it.” Murphy sat the gun on the bed next to Clarke who was beginning to have a hard time breathing and he rushed out of the room.

“Lexa…” Clarke started, but stopped when she felt Lexa’s free hand against her cheek. It had only been a short time ago when it was against her cheek in a moment of pure adoration. “I can’t-“

“Shhh…” Lexa leaned in closer to her. “You’ll be fine, Clarke.”

“You’re… always… so calm.” Clarke got out with a small smile, referencing her comment from earlier that same day when things seemed so different.

“Heda!” A guard entered the room and observed the scene.

“Take Titus. Lock him away.”

“Heda, I-“ Titus tried to get out.

“Em pleni!” She looked at him as the Commander. “There is nothing you can offer, Titus.” She nodded toward the guard to took Titus by the arm. Titus appeared to be going willingly though as if in shock by what had happened. He clearly planned to kill Clarke, but his attempt to blame Murphy hadn’t gone as planned and now his Commander knew of his betrayal. 

“Clarke?” Lexa looked back at her and it was Lexa that spoke; not the Commander from a moment ago. “I am calm because I know you will make it through this.” She lifted her hand from Clarke’s stomach to watch blood rush out. She looked scared for only a moment before lifting Clarke’s shirt up and putting her hand back in place. Her free hand now went to clasped Clarke’s at her side. “Tell me what to do.” Lexa stared down at her.

Clarke’s eyes met hers and she squeezed the hand Lexa held. She felt herself gasping for breath more so now than before and wondered if that meant she didn’t have long. Is this what all the people she’d killed at Mount Weather felt before they died? Is this what Finn felt as the knife she’d held entered his chest?

“You need to roll me over to see if the bullet went through.” She managed to get out in one breath.

“It didn’t. I was behind you.” Lexa reminded her. “You jumped in front of me.” She leaned down further and pressed her lips against Clarke’s forehead. She didn’t kiss her. She just rested them there. “You shouldn’t have done that.”

Clarke laughed, but felt the pain shoot through her body immediately and regretted it.

“You can’t… die. Arkadia needs… you as… Commander.“ She tried.

Lexa lifted her head up and stared into Clarke’s eyes.

“Don’t make it about your people, Clarke.” She implored. “Not this time.” She leaned back down and purposefully pressed her lips to Clarke’s forehead, applying a gentle kiss.  
Clarke just nodded.

“It’s still… inside.” She referred to the bullet. “I need surgery. Your… healer… can’t help.” She covered Lexa’s hand on her wound with her free hand and looked at her in a way she’d unfortunately grown accustomed too. One of them was facing death while the other one had to look on helplessly.

A healer rushed into the room, but paused a few feet away from the bed when he noticed it was Wanheda in the bed.

“Heda?”

“Help her!” The Commander ordered.

Clarke released her hands while Lexa took a step backward to allow the healer to approach and begin working.

“Lexa?”

“I’m here.” Lexa expressed while placing a gentle hand on Clarke’s knee.

“Lexa, I-” She stopped herself. She closed her eyes momentarily as if that could push the pain away before she opened them up again and met Lexa’s eyes with her own again. “I lo-“

“No.” Lexa told her. “Shof op.” She knew Clarke would understand her. A tear fell down her face and she used her hand, now covered in Clarke’s blood to wipe it away, leaving a trace of it on her cheek. “Not like this.” She begged. Clarke lightly nodded again as the healer began trying to examine her wound. Clarke felt her field of vision begin to blur. She couldn’t make out the features of Lexa’s face anymore. She felt the room begin to fade away. “Clarke, stay awake.” Lexa moved around the healer and leaned down near Clarke’s ear. “Please don’t leave me.” She whispered right as Clarke closed her eyes for what she worried might be the final time.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

When Clarke woke up, the room was dimly lit with the flickering candles she'd grown accustomed to since coming to Polis. She couldn't move her body and her neck appeared to be sore when she tried to turn it to the right and then back to the left. Her eyes were heavy and she could tell she needed sleep, but she was grateful to just be able to open them again. Her breathing was labored and she somehow knew she wasn't yet out of the woods. When her eyes landed on Lexa who was lying next to her, she tried to smile at the girl, but couldn't because she recognized that her cheek still held the stain of her own blood and she could tell that tears had streaked down both cheeks as well. She wasn't sure if she could speak so she wiggled her fingers, feeling Lexa's hand grasping them. The Commander's eyes shot opened immediately and stared at her. Then, Lexa recognized Clarke and sighed deeply before pulling her hand from Clarke's and placing it on her cheek.

"You're safe." She told her.

Clarke recalled the last time she'd uttered those words to her. She hadn't been sure that she could trust her then. She knew she could trust her now.  
"What happened?" Clarke asked her.

"We've done what we can. Murphy was able to find Octavia and Indra. Octavia is on her way to Arkadia to get your mother."

"The bullet…" Clarke faded as she tried to feel her stomach.

"Don't." Lexa pulled Clarke's hand away from the wound. "It's still inside. You shouldn't move. You should rest."

"If I fall asleep, I might not wake up."

Lexa leaned forward to press her forehead to Clarke's.

"I didn't say fall asleep. I said to rest. Just lie still." Lexa moved her hand over Clarke's wound and set it there as lightly as she could. "Titus will pay with his life for this."

"You can't do that." Clarke replied. "You can't kill the Flamekeeper for trying to kill someone your people view as an enemy."

"He wanted blood. It should be his."

"Lexa, you can't." Clarke felt a terrible pain shoot through her body and her face reflected it.

"What's wrong?" Lexa pulled her face back to look at her. "I'll get the healer." She practically jumped off the bed and turned to walk toward the door.

"Just stay." Clarke gulped. "They can't do anything." She reminded Lexa. "They don't have…" She faded out. "Arkadia…" She tried to finish.

"Your mother should be here by morning." Lexa walked back toward the bed, but stopped at the nearby table and reached for a rag that had been placed in a bowl of water. She wrung it out and then moved to kneel on the bed, placing it on Clarke's forehead. She stared down at her wishing there was something more she could offer her. She wished she could take her pain away. She knew in that moment and if she was being honest with herself, she knew in many other moments that she would gladly give her life to protect Clarke. It was not the way of the Commander. That was true. She knew at least in that, Titus had been right. To be Commander was to be alone, but Lexa knew something Titus did not. Clarke made her better. She was a better Commander to her people because of how Clarke challenged her, because of the person Clarke was. She'd been so close to telling her how she felt. Knowing Clarke was leaving and that it would be a long time before they saw each other again almost caused her to utter those words, but she worried that Clarke would again turn her away. She worried that her feelings would not be returned. She worried that that pain would be the end of her. Watching Clarke walk away would have been bad enough, but telling her that she loved her and having Clarke not say it back would have caused her unspeakable pain. So, she changed her reply. She never thought Clarke would initiate a kiss.

Lexa had been so patient with her. She'd respected her space, her wishes. She'd let her deal with her grief over Mount Weather and the betrayal she felt by someone she thought she could trust. Lexa knew she'd made the right decision at the mountain. The Commander in her didn't regret it for a moment, but the person inside her hated hurting Clarke, hated risking the possibility of something between them someday. She never thought she'd get the chance to repair the damage of that day.

"You should use… that on you." Clarke motioned with her eyebrows without moving any other part of her body. "Your face."

Lexa reached to her cheek, feeling something foreign there.

"It's not the first time I've had blood on my face." She told Clarke. "But it will be the last time that it's yours." She assured.

"You should go." Clarke suggested. "You have to lead-"

"Indra remained behind. She is my second."

"Lexa-"

"No." Lexa insisted. "I won't leave you." She insisted. "Not this time." Clarke's eyes shut again while Lexa watched over her. "Ste yuj, Clarke. Be strong."

_____

"My daughter was shot because of you, because of this failed alliance." It was Abby's voice that woke her from her sleep. Her eyes could barely handle the amount of light in the room and it was then that she realized she wasn't in her own room. She recognized the patterns the light was dancing through. She was in Lexa's room. She was in Lexa's bed. She tried to swallow and had difficulty. She was incredibly thirsty. She looked to her right as saw that she'd been hooked up to an IV and she lifted her head just enough to notice bandages on her stomach that she knew didn't come from the healer.

"Clarke's attacker will be dealt with." It was Lexa's voice, but she couldn't see her. She tried to lean forward a little, but was met with pain so she leaned back against the pillow. It was then that she took in the scent of Lexa. She'd so recently been lying in this bed with her, tracing her fingers up and down her back admiring her tattoo and then watching the girl roll over and smile at her the biggest smile she'd ever seen her offer the world. She'd been so happy that she was the cause of that smile.

When Titus began his attack, she was just doing everything she could to stay out of a bullet's path. When she saw Lexa enter the doorway out of the corner of her eye and realized that's where she was headed and that meant so was a bullet out of Titus's gun, she instinctively jumped in front of her. There was no other way to describe her movement other than to say that her instinct, her heart told her to protect Lexa. It wasn't her quick thinking that Lexa's death could mean a war between the grounders and the sky people. It wasn't her worrying about her people over everything else. It was her desire to keep Lexa safe.

She heard a loud beeping and recognized it as a monitor. She looked to her hand and saw she was attached to one and watched as her mother ran into the room flanked by Lexa and Octavia.

"Clarke, lie back." Abby ordered. "You just had surgery." She rushed to her side and quickly examined the screen she had attached to the monitor on Clarke's finger.

"Is she okay?" Octavia asked while nervously playing with her fingers.

"We took the bullet out, honey. There was some damage to your liver so we had to take a piece of it out too. You need to rest, but you'll be okay." She paused and pressed her hand to Clarke's forehead as if checking her temperature. Lexa stood back behind her, not sure what to do. "I want to take you back to Arkadia, but we had to sneak out and Murphy stole a truck to get us here fast enough so-"

"Clarke should stay here." Lexa interjected. "We'll get you whatever you need to take care of her."

Abby turned toward Lexa.

"This is how you take care of my daughter!" She glared at her. "She has a bullet wound in her gut thanks to your protection."

"Mom, stop." Clarke moved her hand to cover Abby's. "It's not her fault."

"It's Pike's fault." Octavia spoke up and took a step toward the bed. "This all started with him. Things were fine until he became Chancellor."

"Fine might not be the best way to describe it." Clarke realized she'd made a joke and let out a small laugh, but it was enough to cause pain to shoot through her once again. She'd noticed Lexa's shy smile at her joke, but it disappeared the moment she realized Clarke was in pain and she'd made her way to the other side of the bed and knelt down next to her. She sat her hand on the bed near Clarke's, but not touching it. Clarke stared at it for a moment before Abby drew her attention away.

"I brought what I could with me, but Clarke, you really should be in a real hospital."

"We can't take her back there." Octavia reminded her. "If Pike sees her or me, he'll lock us up. If we get lucky, he'll let her stay in the hospital first, but he might not care enough to help a grounder sympathizer." She paused. "Clarke's better off here." She nodded in Clarke's direction. Clarke understood that nod to be her way of apologizing for questioning Clarke's loyalty to her people earlier.

"I can't go there, but I can't stay here either." Clarke stated.

"Why?" Lexa asked concerned.

"The kill order."

"Isn't in effect, Clarke. I stopped it, remember?" Lexa explained and stared down at her hand only for a moment before looking back at Clarke.

"The blockade?" Clarke asked.

"There are guards stationed outside of Arkadia." Lexa explained. "I've sent word to hold off on the kill order, but to follow anyone who leaves the camp and report back to me."

"Well, that's better than killing people when they leave." Octavia retorted.

"Yes, it is." Clarke stated in agreement, but also as a way to get Octavia to calm down.

"You can stay here, Clarke." Lexa told her. She looked at Abby. "She'll be safe here. I give you my word."

"I want to trust you, Lexa." Abby started. "But I don't know if I can. This is my daughter."

"Mom, you can trust her." Clarke moved her hand a few inches over to cover Lexa's. Lexa looked surprised at this touch and stared at their connected hands as she had done when she bowed before Clarke to swear her fealty to her, to show her that she would treat her people as her own, to show her that she viewed her as her equal. The Commander never bows to anyone, but Lexa bowed to her. As Clarke helped her up, Lexa's eyes remained on their linked hands not comprehending the fact that Clarke's hand was on hers and that the girl she never thought she'd be able to touch again, was touching her.

Abby's eyes went to their hands before returning back to Clarke. Octavia stared at the hands only for a moment before rolling her eyes and turning her body to stare out the window instead.

"We need more medicine." Abby pronounced.

"You'll get it. I'll send riders to Arkadia." Lexa started to explain.

"I'll go." Octavia didn't even turn around. "If you send riders, it will start a war. Pike's already on the path. I'll sneak in, get what Abby needs, meet up with Kane, make a plan."

"A plan to take out Pike?" Clarke asked her. She watched as Abby took a syringe and stuck it in the IV. She suspected she'd be asleep soon thanks to whatever medication her mother just pumped into her.

Octavia nodded and turned back toward them.

"Make a list of what you need. I'll get it." She looked at Abby. "Can I take Indra?" She turned toward Lexa.

"Indra is-" Lexa started.

"Yes." Clarke interrupted her. Lexa looked down at her. "You need to be out there." She told Lexa. "You shouldn't be in here with me. They're already talking about it. You need to be out there, leading your people. You need to prevent a war, Lexa."

"Indra is perfectly capable of-"

"Indra is not you." Clarke reminded her. She looked toward Octavia. "Take Indra if you need her."

"Who's the Commander now?" Octavia replied sarcastically. "I'm taking a horse. Less obvious." She started walking toward the door. "I'll get Indra. Abby?"

"I'll get you a list." Abby stood. "I'll be right back." She said to Clarke before walking away. She glanced in Lexa's direction as if saying she better not mess with her daughter and followed Octavia out.

"Clarke-"

"Lexa, you know I'm right. How long has it been since I was shot?"

"Two days." Lexa answered her.

"That's two days too long. You need to-"

"I will." Lexa stopped her and gripper her hand more tightly. "Are you in pain?"

"I'm fine."

"That's not what I asked, Clarke."

"Have you noticed that you say my name a lot?" Clarke smiled shyly at her, feeling the medicine's effect take over. "You'll be looking right at me, I'll be the only one in the room and you still say Clarke."

Lexa smiled at her.

"Is that better than talking about my death?" She attempted to joke back.

Clarke's eyes got heavy.

"I don't want to sleep. I need-"

"To rest, Clarke. You need to rest." She moved so that she was lying beside her and rolled on her side to face her. Her hand went to Clarke's thigh since she worried she couldn't lay it over her stomach.

"You can't-"

"Just until you fall asleep and then I will return to being Commander."

Clarke's breathing slowed as her eyes closed. Lexa watched her closely. She was so grateful to be able to watch the girl's chest rise and fall with every breath knowing how close she'd come to losing her.

"I was happy." Clarke practically whispered.

"What?" Lexa asked her, leaning closer to try to hear.

"When we were here last time, I was happy."

"Here?"

"This room." Clarke took a deep breath and turned her head ever so slightly toward Lexa, keeping her eyes closed. "I never thought I'd never be happy again after everything."

Lexa smiled and moved her hand to Clarke's face brushing her matted blonde hair away so she could see it better. Clarke's breathing grew even slower and Lexa could recognize she was asleep. She leaned in and pressed her lips to Clarke's.

"I was happy too." She whispered knowing the girl couldn't hear her.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

"Aden, what would you do to Titus if you were Heda?" Lexa asked Aden who stood next to her in front of Titus who was kneeling on the floor in the room that only a few days ago had been the location of a grounder's death at Titus's hand to protect Lexa.

"I do not know, Heda." Aden replied confused while Titus looked on.

Lexa turned to him.

"Did you not vow to protect the Sky People as they are a member of the coalition?" She questioned.

"But are they still? Their leader rejected the alliance."

"Pike will be taken care of." She turned to stare at Titus and took a few steps toward him. He had no guards holding him in his kneeling position. The guards stood back toward the doors, but she knew she would not require them. "What would you do, Flamekeeper? You seem to think you know better than the Commander what is right. What would you do if you were Heda?"

"Heda, I am prepared to accept my punishment. I am ready for death." He lowered his head.

"Heda, is death a punishment we are allowed to deliver? The Sky People are not of the coalition. They are the enemy now. Titus attacked the enemy." Aden took a step forward, but stopped when Lexa turned back toward him, her black war paint alighting her bright yet somehow still dark eyes.

"The Commander decides what punishment is appropriate, Aden." She answered his question in a tone of frustration and then recognized the look of fear in the boy's eyes. "That is all. Leave us." She ordered a little more gently and the boy nodded and walked past them toward the doors that were opened by the two guards.

"Lexa, you must know I never intended-" Titus lifted his head and began.

"Your intentions were to murder Clarke, blame Murphy and start a war between our people."

"My duty is to protect you, Heda and the decisions you were making were made out of-" He started.

Lexa moved quickly to stand over him. In one swift movement, she had removed her long sword from its sheath and pressed it hard against Titus's skin. A trickle of blood slowly rolled down to the fabric of his robe while she stared at him intently.

"Your duty is to obey me!" She yelled. "Your duty is to provide me guidance, but to follow my command. That is your duty, Titus. Hod yu rein daun, teacher!" She kept the sword at his neck and watched as he closed his eyes.

"I do know my place, Heda. You love Wanheda." He lifted his bound hands as if in prayer. "You will always defer to her in times where you should trust your own people, your teachers."

"Clarke is my people. I swore fealty to her and the Sky People and I did so because it would prevent future wars, future death; not merely because of feelings." She lowered her sword and left it hanging at her side. "You should have trusted me, Titus. I trusted you."

"I did what I thought was right, Heda."

"And now so must I." She slid her sword back in its sheath. "I can no longer trust you, Titus. You will only seek to finish what you started and I will not risk Clarke's life because you fail to see that peace can be our way. We can work with Skaikru to take out their leadership that prefers war to peace. You could have been a part of the solution to what has caused countless deaths throughout our history." She paused as he met her eye. "Instead, you have chosen to become part of the problem."

"Heda, I accept my death."

"You accept it too freely, Titus. Death is not going to be granted today. You will join the Mountain Man in banishment from my lands. You will never again know the confidence of a Commander. This is your greatest fear and this will be your punishment." She motioned to the guards to approach and pick him up. As he stood in front of her, she took her knife and undid his binds. "This punishment is worse than death. Solitude for a teacher." She nodded and watched as the guards pulled him backwards by the arms.

"Heda, hod op!" Titus yelled as he was being pulled through the doors.

Lexa watched and after the doors closed behind them, leaving her all alone, she let out a sigh and hung her head. She'd just lost her teacher, advisor, protector, and father figure. She told herself it was right for her people. She couldn't have someone she no longer trusted in her alliance, but that wasn't the only reason she banished Titus.

_____

The heavy doors to her room were pushed open for her by the guard she had remain outside the room to keep watch over Clarke. She moved into the room gracefully and noticed Clarke was still asleep. Abby was keeping watch over her in a chair by the bed.

"How is she?" Lexa asked while clasping her hands behind her back and standing at the end of the bed.

"She's stable. We need to get her the medication from Arkadia to help stave off an infection."

"Octavia will return soon." Lexa offered kindly.

"I hope so." Abby leaned over and took Clarke's hand. "What happened?" She asked.

"One of my people did this. He has been dealt with." Lexa replied.

"I want the details, Lexa." Abby glare in her direction told Lexa she was not looking at the Commander, but at the woman Lexa also was. Abby was smart enough to know Lexa was more than just the Commander to her daughter even if it took Lexa a long time to see that herself after all that had happened between them. "How did my daughter end up getting shot? She was supposed to be safe here."

"Titus believed I was letting… things get in the way of my duty as Commander." She glanced at Clarke's sleeping form and then back at Abby.

"He blamed Clarke."

"He blamed me, but his duty was to me. He punished her." She knew Titus blamed Clarke's influence over her, but indirectly, that meant he blamed his Commander for allowing that influence. He couldn't harm Lexa, but he could end that influence by taking Clarke's life.

"And who is your duty to, Lexa?" Abby questioned her, removing her hand from Clarke's and leaning back in the chair.

Lexa hung her head. She lifted it when she heard Clarke mutter her name in a breathy tone while still asleep. Abby glanced at Clarke as well before returning her attention to Lexa.

"My duty is to my people." Lexa finally replied. "But Clarke is…" She started and stared at the girl in the bed. "Clarke is my people."

"She can't belong here, Lexa."

"She does belong here." Lexa retorted quickly while taking a defensive step toward the bed.

"She can't if she's not safe here." Abby looked back to Clarke. "I'm not just saying this as her mother or as a doctor, but as a former Chancellor and leader of my people. Being here, puts her at risk. Clarke is important."

"I know."

"She protected those kids when we sent them from the Ark. She led them. She's still a leader even though I was technically in charge." She looked at her daughter. "She's stubborn."

"She's special." Lexa clarified.

"She is." Abby agreed. "No matter what happens with Pike or Kane or me, Clarke can be a leader our people can count on. She's smart and careful while also being strong enough to make the tough decisions. She cares about her people. She cares about the future. She…" Abby stopped herself and looked down at her injured child.

"She will be fine." Lexa offered.

"You care about her?" Abby checked.

Lexa looked at her and nodded once.

There was a knock at the door.

"Enter." Lexa ordered.

Murphy walked into the room.

"Octavia's on the walkie." He told Abby and walked toward her, handing her the radio.

"Octavia?" Abby pressed the button and spoke.

"Yeah, I got what you need, but I can't find Kane. They've got patrols everywhere since the grounders are on the perimeter. I can risk trying to find him, but it could take time and if they catch me-."

Abby and Lexa shared a glance.

"Can you find Raven?" Abby asked.

"Raven's all doped up on that City of Light crap. We can't trust her. Lincoln's locked up. I can't find Miller or Monty. Kane's not responding to my call. He must not have his radio on him. I'm near the exit. I just need a decision. Do you want me to turn back or get you the drugs for Clarke?"

"Ask her where Indra is." Lexa told her.

"Octavia, what about Indra?"

"She's guarding the exit and smoothing things over with the grounders to keep them from trying to kill me. Yes, or no, Abby? Stay or go?"

"May I?" Lexa asked. Abby nodded almost reluctantly and Lexa walked the few steps around the bed and took the radio. "Octavia?" She pressed the button.

"Lexa?"

"Return with the medicine." She said into the radio while looking at Clarke. "Indra must remain behind with the radio. Have her attempt to contact Kane every 15 minutes to arrange a meeting."

"Abby?" Octavia checked.

"Yu sou Octavia kom Trikru. Ai laik yu Heda." Lexa reminded.

There was a silence on the other end of the radio.

"Sha Heda." Octavia finally returned. "Abby, I'm on my way."

Lexa handed Abby back the radio. She, in turn, handed it to Murphy.

"What should I do?" Murphy asked. "I can't exactly go back to Arkadia."

"I'll have a room made up for you." Lexa exchanged and walked toward the door to open it. Abby and Murphy watched her speak to a guard and then return. "Follow him." She looked to Abby. "You're free to remain in here with Clarke, but I've had a room prepared for you as well."

Abby looked around for a moment.

"This is your room." She seemed to realize for the first time.

"Yes."

"Will you watch her?" Abby asked. "I'll be back in an hour to check on her. I just need-"

"Rest. I'll have food brought to your room. I will notify you if her condition changes." Lexa assured.

"I'll be back in an hour." Abby restated.

"Mom, I'm fine. Go get some sleep." Clarke had apparently been listening to them for a least the last few moments. Her eyes opened slowly as she stared at her mother. "You need to sleep too."

"How do you feel?" Abby took her hand.

"I'm okay. Just sore mostly. Go. I'm fine." Clarke replied.

"Octavia will be back with the medication by tomorrow morning."

"Good." Clarke told her. "I'll be okay until then."  
"You should eat something."

"I'll have something brought in for her." Lexa spoke up and Clarke turned her gaze toward her.

Abby watched the two of them glancing at one another and recognized the moment.

"I'll let you have your room." She told Lexa and began walking toward the door. "If anything-"

"She knows, mom." Clarke spoke more loudly.

Abby smirked at her daughter, feeling happy that at least her stubbornness had returned. She walked through the door and was met by a guard who walked her and Murphy toward their rooms.

"How do you feel?" Lexa asked, returning her eyes to Clarke while still standing near the bed and clasping her hands again behind her back.

"Are they safe here?" Clarke asked about her mom and Murphy.

"Titus has been banished." Lexa explained.

Clarke smiled shyly at her.

"It's not just him."  
"I know." Lexa replied quickly. "They will be safe, Clarke."

Clarke stared at her and noticed she appeared nervous.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Lexa answered.

Clarke smiled at her.

"You can come closer. I won't break, Lexa."

Lexa remained unmoving.

"I should change." She started to walk off toward her private bathroom.

Clarke tried to sit up slightly and felt a little pain, but not as much as before. She lifted her bandage and could see that she was beginning to heal and she replaced it quickly knowing Lexa wouldn't want her messing with it. She reached over to the table and took a long drink from the water she'd be left and then replaced the glass. Lexa returned moments later minus the war paint and with her hair down and to the side as it had been that day. She was running her fingers through it nervously when she stood, yet again, by the bed.

"Lexa…"

"I'll have food brought-"

"Lexa, stop!" Clarke nearly yelled. She took a deep breath. "It's late." She motioned lightly with out the window and noted the flickering light of the candles with her hand. "Please, just lie down with me."

Lexa stopped toying with her hair and walked around to the other side of the bed. She pulled back the blankets and slowly slid under them.

"What if Abby returns in an hour? Maybe I shouldn't sleep here."

"Are you afraid of my mom?" Clarke smirked at her as she watched her half sit down/half lie down next to her. Lexa hung her head in a smile and shook it slightly back and forth. "What's really bothering you?"

"How can you ask me that?" Lexa questioned without meeting her eye.

"I'm fine-"

"Stop saying that, Clarke." Lexa turned to look at her and Clarke saw that the smile was gone. Her eyes were glazy. "You were shot. You nearly died."

"Aren't you always the one telling me that death is not the end?" Clarke tried. She reached for Lexa's hand, but Lexa pulled it away.

"I just-" She stopped herself, looked down at Clarke's hand, which was still just resting there and moved her own to cover it at last. "I waited, Clarke."

"I know."

"I never thought we'd-"  
"I know."

"And then you were here and we were together and then I almost lost you."

"I'd feel the same way if the bullet had hit you." Clarke admitted and spread her fingers out so Lexa would slide hers between them. She watched as Lexa took their linked hands and pressed Clarke's to her lips lovingly. "We spent so much time talking about war and death."

"I don't want to talk about that now."

"We don't have to talk at all." Clarke's smile was wide as she watched Lexa turn to look at her and Clarke's smile faded a little as she watched Lexa's expand. "Wow." She barely uttered.

"What?" Lexa asked confused; her smile fading.

"Nothing." She shook her head. "Tell me about Titus, Arkadia. Did Octavia meet with Kane?"

"Not now, Clarke."

"Lexa, I'm okay. I need-"  
"You need to rest. Slide down." She told her and moved a little so Clarke could slide her body back down into a comfortable sleeping position.

"You know this is probably the only time you'll get me to just obey you without a debate, right?"

"I have no problems with our debates, Clarke." Lexa slid down herself and while on her side, rested her hand over Clarke's stomach ever so gently. "Does this hurt?"

"No." Clarke answered her. Lexa's eyes looked heavy. "Have you slept since it happened?"

"A Commander-"  
"Is still human, Lexa." Clarke finished for her.

She covered Lexa's hand with her own again and began playing with her fingers.

"What would I have done, Clarke?" Lexa asked her, leaning forward and sliding her body along so she could be closer to Clarke. Her head rested on her elbow and Clarke's eyes remained on their linked hands.

"You would have been fine. You were fine without me before. You'd be fine without me if something had happened." She turned to look at her. "If something does happen." Lexa didn't say anything. Her eyes flitted from Clarke's eyes to her lips and then back again. "I'm the one that should be worried about if something had happened to you."

"I told you the next Commander would protect you." Lexa reminded her.

"I don't want the next Commander." Clarke stated while leaning forward enough to press her forehead to Lexa's. "I want you." She admitted.

Lexa pulled back for a moment and met Clarke's shy glance with a look of shock before resting her tired eyes by closing them and leaning in to press her lips against Clarke's. Clarke reciprocated, but only slightly at first before she felt Lexa's hand move from her stomach to her cheek and she used it to brush Clarke's long hair away from her face before cupping her cheek again. The kiss wasn't going anywhere. They both knew that. When they finally pulled back, Clarke took her hand and ran it through Lexa's hair.

"You should sleep now." Lexa told her.

"I like your hair like this." She played with the ends. Lexa smiled shyly again. "No one gets to see you like this, do they?" Clarke questioned.

"Only you."

Clarke smiled.

"Will you fall asleep with me?"

"Yes." Lexa replied and their hands returned to Clarke's stomach. Clarke played with her fingers for a moment before her actions along with her breath slowed and Lexa stared at her chest rise and fall again while her own eyes grew heavier and heavier. She lowered her head onto Clarke's shoulder, careful not to hurt or wake her and finally closed her eyes.

When Abby did return about an hour after she'd left, she found Lexa wrapped around her daughter and both of them comfortably asleep. It both worried her and soothed her somehow at the same time. She opted not to wake them and returned to the room Lexa had setup for her. Clarke shifted in her sleep when she heard the door shut despite Abby's attempt to keep her actions quiet and she realized Lexa was cuddled into her side. She turned her head slightly toward the girl and kissed her forehead, leaving her head there as she fell back asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

The brightness in the room didn't wake either of them, but the door opening loudly did. Lexa snapped to attention and once she noticed Abby standing in the doorway with Octavia, she jumped out of the bed while Clarke was still trying to register what was happening.

"Glad you caught up on your beauty sleep, Clarke." Octavia joked while passing Abby a bag of something.

"We got what we need." Abby told Clarke and sat the bag on the end of the bed, removing items she needed.

"Indra remained behind in Arkadia?" Lexa asked, feeling a little anxious at being caught in such a position with Clarke.

"She's there. I have no way of getting in contact with her since I had to leave the radio. Did she check in?"

"Not yet." Abby answered for Lexa.

Lexa realized she didn't know the answer. She'd been in bed with Clarke instead of keeping up with the important affairs of her people.

"Murphy has the radio. Why don't you take it from him?"

"What are we going to do with that guy?" Octavia more asked Clarke than Lexa or Abby.

"He helped me. I know he's done some bad things, but he's on our side."  
"He's on his side." Octavia retorted.

"Perhaps we should discuss this when Clarke has healed more." Lexa tried.

"She's awake. She's fine." Octavia replied. She then looked at her Commander. "Bosh moba, Heda." She apologized reluctantly. "Look, I don't know who's in charge here. You're the Commander and I feel more like Trikru than Skaikru, but Skaikru are my people too. Lincoln is being held in Arkadia and Pike is in charge there, but Kane should be the Chancellor, but technically Abby was Chancellor before Kane and then there's Clarke." She motioned with her hand toward the girl in the bed while Abby hung a new IV bag. "She was in charge before all of you and despite my idiot brother trying to wreck everything in the beginning, she did a pretty good job."

"Thanks." Clarke replied without really knowing what to say.

"Just stating the facts." She paused and began walking backwards out of the room. "I'm going to find Murphy. Why don't you guys just figure out who's in charge here so I know who to listen to and we can actually take Arkadia back and prevent a war between our people or your people or my people." She turned her back toward them. "I don't even know anymore."

"She's right." Clarke stated while sitting up slightly. "We need to present a united front. We need to figure out-" She stopped herself when she noticed her mom putting something in the IV. "No. Mom, I don't want to sleep."

"It's just an antibiotic, Clarke. It won't put you to sleep."

Clarke nodded and Abby injected the medicine into the IV.

"We need a plan to stop Pike. We need…" She faded out. She looked at Abby. "We need…"

"I lied." Abby admitted. "You need more rest."

"Mom." Clarke turned her head toward Lexa. "Lexa?"

"Sleep, Clarke. It's going to be okay." Lexa assured.

Clarke's eyes grew heavier.

"We're talking about this when…" She had turned back to Abby to deliver her words, but passed out before she could finish.

"Sorry, but she's not ready to start worrying about this stuff yet." Abby told Lexa. Lexa nodded in reply. "When she wakes up, she'll be angry, but she needs to eat something of substance and then we can see if she's ready to try walking around a little to regain her strength, but I don't want her pushing it."

"Okay." Lexa listened intently.

"I can trust you, can't I?" Abby asked her seriously.

"Yes." Lexa answered quickly.

"This is my daughter, Lexa." Abby walked toward the Commander. "I need to return to Arkadia. Kane and my people need me there and its likely Pike hasn't noticed I'm gone, but he will soon if I don't get back. I don't want him knowing about Clarke's injury or what happened here."

"Neither do I."

"You have the supplies to take care of her, I can talk to your healer and make sure he knows what to do, but can you assure me she will be safe here? That you will protect her?"

"With my life." Lexa meant it and Abby could see that.

"I'll see myself out. I'll do what I can from inside Arkadia and I'll make sure Indra is safe."

"Thank you."

"Thank me by taking care of Clarke."

Lexa nodded again and watched as Abby left the room. She turned to look at Clarke, who appeared to be sound asleep until she saw her eyes shoot open.

"You should tell her to take Murphy with her. He can be of use at Arkadia."

"You were asleep." Lexa walked toward her.

Clarke smirked and held up the tubing from the IV. She had it crimped between her fingers preventing the medicine from entering her body.

"I know my mother." Lexa tried to take her hand, but Clarke pulled it back. "I know you too. Don't make me go back to sleep."

Lexa rolled her eyes.

"Why should she take Murphy?"

"Because he's a survivor. He'll do anything to survive."

"If he only looks out for himself, that does us no good."

"He wants a place to belong just like Octavia. Just like all of Skaikru. He can protect her." Clarke got to the point.

"Miya snap!" Lexa yelled while turning around as the door opened and one of the guards entered. "Find Murphy and tell Abby he is to accompany her. He should remain behind the barricade with Indra unless Kane needs his help inside Arkadia. If he has a problem with this, send him here."

The guard nodded and left quickly.

"Thank you."

Lexa turned back to her.

"Thank me by going back to sleep." Lexa begged and walked toward her, but then noticed that Clarke had removed the IV from her arm and was pressing a bandage to the spot that now pooled blood.

"I'm fine. I'm actually really hungry."

Lexa sat on the edge of the bed and looked at Clarke before lifting her shirt up enough to look at the bandage covering most of her stomach.

"Be honest." She started before pulling at the tape to lift the bandage slightly so she could examine the wound. "How badly does it hurt?"

Clarke felt Lexa's fingers gently touch her skin just below the wound and it was enough to cause goose bumps to break out as the fingers slid across it.

"It's not that bad now." She didn't mean it the way it sounded. Lexa smiled at her and put the bandage back in place and pulled her shirt down to cover it.

"You should change. Your mom put those clothes on you after the surgery."

"I should do more than just change my clothes."

"I'll prepare a bath for you and send for food for when you're done. I'll have clothes brought in from your room and-"

"Lexa?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you." She reached for Lexa's hand and took it in her own.

"You have nothing to thank me for. You saved my life." Lexa stood, but kept their hands linked. She leaned down and pressed her lips to Clarke's forehead before touching them gently to Clarke's lips. "And you were right, Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving." She stood up all the way; not waiting for a response before she walked into her bathroom.

She emerged a few minutes later and walked toward the door. She said something to another guard and came back into the room.

"Clarke, hold on." She rushed to Clarke's side as the girl tried to stand on her own. "You shouldn't be standing without help." Clarke lifted her arm so Lexa could slide under it and help her walk very slowly to the bathroom where she'd filled the bathtub only half way with water; not knowing if Clarke's wound could be submerged in water or not. "Should I get the healer or-"  
"For what?" Clarke asked as they arrived at the edge of the bathtub.

"To help you."

"To help me what? Take off my clothes? Take a bath?" Clarke questioned.

"Yes." Lexa lifted Clarke's arm off of her shoulders.

Clarke laughed and noticed that the pain was better this time. She lifted her arms and began pulling at the loose shirt her mother had apparently put on her after the surgery. Lexa stood in front of her and watched. Once it was off, Clarke held it in her hand a moment as she stood in front of Lexa with nothing covering her chest. Lexa continued to meet her eyes, but took a step forward to take the shirt from her hand and set it on the chair next to the bathtub. She watched as Clarke nodded to her and put her hands on her pants to slide them down her body along with her underwear. The only thing covering Clarke's skin was the bandage over her stomach. Lexa gingerly lifted Clarke's legs to pull the clothing off her entirely and tossed it on the chair before standing back up and placing her hands on her waist.

"Can you…" Clarke started and looked down. Lexa knew what she meant and she tried to pull off the bandage without hurting Clarke. Once removed, she threw it in a trash can and returned to Clarke.

"Should I help you in?"

"Yes." Clarke told her. "Can you close that first?" Clarke asked her referring to the door. Lexa nodded and walked toward the door. She closed it and twisted the lock to make sure Clarke felt entirely safe in this vulnerable position and she returned to her. She stood behind her for a moment and lifted her hair that had grown out so much since they'd first met and pulled it back from her face and then ran her hands down her back. Clarke felt the fingers graze her skin and sighed as silently as she could.

"You're beautiful." Lexa leaned forward and kissed Clarke between the shoulder blades before lowering her hair back down to cover them. She walked around to face her and watched as Clarke bit her upper lip before putting her hands out and lifting Lexa's shirt. "Clarke?"

"Please?" Clarke asked. She pulled the shirt up higher and watched as Lexa lifted her arms so she could remove it. It hurt Clarke, but she grimaced only as Lexa's face was covered by the shirt because she knew if she saw her in pain, she'd force her to go back on the medication. Clarke's eyes met Lexa's and she could tell the girl was vulnerable despite the fact that they'd both seen each other naked and recently at that. Lexa removed her own pants and once she was bare as well, she placed her clothing on top of Clarke's and climbed into the bathtub. She helped Clarke lift her legs one at a time and when she laid back, she pulled Clarke back against her. She wrapped her arms around her cautiously so as not to cause her pain and after a few moments of silence shared, she began running her fingers up and down Clarke's arm.

"I never thought we'd get to have this." Lexa finally broke the silence. She used her free hand to run soap across Clarke's skin slowly as she was enjoying being able to touch her.

"Neither did I." Clarke shared and kept her eyes closed, feeling Lexa pressed against her and her hands on her body.

"I am sorry, Clarke. I should have known Titus would attempt something like this. I trusted him when I shouldn't have and it almost cost you your life."

"He only wanted to protect you."

"He was my subject. It was his duty to obey my command." She sounded more forceful.

"Can we not be Heda and Wanheda for a moment?" She leaned her head back further and Lexa pressed her lips to Clarke's shoulder.

"We don't have that luxury, Clarke." Lexa reminded her.

"I know. That's why… I'm me, right?" Clarke smiled, but kept her eyes closed.

Lexa stopped her movements, recalling the moment she'd said those words to her, before Titus shot her and before she thought saying three words to her would actually matter. She was leaving for Arkadia. They wouldn't be seeing each other for a long time. There was no need to complicate things further. So, she stopped herself and she held out her hand instead.

"That's why I love you, Clarke." She gulped after saying it out loud for the first time. She felt Clarke tense in her grasp, but was grateful she couldn't see her face. It was better since Clarke wouldn't say it back to her. She buried her face in Clarke's hair as if that would shield her from whatever Clarke might say back since it wouldn't be those words.

"Ai hod yu in." Clarke returned in Lexa's tongue. Lexa felt her heart press rapidly against her ribcage as if trying to push itself out of her body. She felt Clarke relax against her again. "I never thought I'd say that to you." Clarke continued. "I never thought I'd be able to look at you again after Mount Weather."

"Clarke…" Lexa's hand began to move again over Clarke's skin, but this time Clarke's fingers moved over Lexa's arm.

"I know. I don't want to talk about it either. I just… we're here now."

There was a sound from the bedroom. It startled Clarke, but Lexa remained calm and held her against her.

"It's your food. The door is locked. They'll leave it on the bed and go." She kissed her neck. "I know we have much to discuss about Arkadia and what to do, but we should finish here and you should eat and rest."

"How much longer are you going to make me rest?" Clarke asked.

"When have I ever made you do anything?" Lexa replied.

Clarke laughed and Lexa felt it against her body. It caused her to smile.

"I'm not good at this, Lexa. I can't just sit on the side and watch things happen around me."

"I know that, Clarke, but you need to heal and I promised your mother I would take care of you."

Clarke laughed again.

"You really are afraid of my mother, aren't you?"

Lexa didn't respond.

"I've never had to-" She finally started after a few moments of silence.

Clarke thought for a moment and sat up. It hurt, but only slightly and not enough to deter her from slowly trying to turn around in the bathtub. Lexa scolded her before giving in to her stubbornness and helping her turn to face her. Lexa straightened her legs as she watched Clarke straighten her body, ungracefully straddle her and wrap her arms around her neck.

"You've never met a mom of someone you're…" Clarke started. "Dating? Is that the right word?"

Lexa smiled at her and moved her arms around Clarke's back.

"You shouldn't be moving around this much. We should get you dressed and back to bed."

"Answer the question." Clarke smirked at her.

"No, I've never had to do that." Lexa replied. She was staring into Clarke's eyes, but Clarke could tell she was nobly avoiding looking elsewhere.

Clarke shook her head at her and pulled her face toward her own and connected their lips. The water splashed slightly as Lexa's arms moved up and down Clarke's back as she lost herself in the kiss. When Clarke pulled away, Lexa's eyes were still closed.

"Don't be nervous around my mom." Clarke tried to order. Lexa smiled and opened her eyes.

"She hates me." Lexa put out while running her hands again up and down Clarke's bare back.

"She doesn't hate you. She doesn't know you."

"Are you in pain right now? You should lie back." Lexa tried to move so Clarke could lie back in front of her.

"I'm fine. We're fine." Clarke expressed and kissed her gently again.

Clarke finally gave in and laid back against Lexa while she felt Lexa's hands running soap over her body. After they were finished, Lexa got out first and wrapped a towel around her body, moving her hair up and out of the way with a band before leaning down and helping Clarke out of the bathtub to help her dry off. She left the room momentarily to retrieve clothes for herself and after dressing, walked to Clarke's room to bring her clothing as well. She asked a guard to bring the rest of Clarke's stuff to her own room since she knew Clarke no longer had a need for the room she'd been nearly killed in. When she returned, Clarke was still wrapped in a towel, but was lying on the bed eating the food that had been brought for her.

"Sorry, I couldn't wait." She confessed.

Lexa sat the clothing on the bed in front of her.

"You might want to get dressed. I'm having them bring your stuff from your room."

"Oh." Clarke moved to stand, but needed Lexa's help. She managed to get to the bathroom in time as there was a knock at the door. Lexa closed the door behind her and told the guards to enter and leave her stuff. Lexa would sort through it for her later. She returned to the bathroom to watch Clarke as she attempted to put a clean shirt over her head, but Lexa approached from behind and helped.

"You need a new bandage. I'll send for the healer." She walked around to Clarke's front and pulled the shirt down the rest of the way. She knelt down and helped her finish getting dressed. As she was kneeling, Clarke noticed something.

"You have another tattoo." She pointed out.

"What?" Lexa asked and stood.

"I didn't notice it before because your hair's so long. The back of your neck."

"Oh, that."

"Turn around." Clarke tried.

"We should get you back to bed. You shouldn't be standing this much."

"Fine." They walked back to the bed and Lexa pulled the blankets over her while Clarke snacked on the food she'd been supplied. "Are you staying with me or…" Clarke didn't like asking that. She hated the fact that she was being selfish. Lexa had an empire to run and Clarke was keeping her from that, but she wanted her here. They'd had so little time together before everything happened. She wanted them to have more time just as Clarke and Lexa and that part was outweighing the part that knew they had jobs to do. They had a war to prevent.

"I will stay until you fall asleep." Lexa answered and climbed in beside her.

"Lie on your back." Clarke asked and moved the tray to the table.

"I should get the healer." Lexa remembered.  
"I can put the bandage on myself or you can do it." She reached for the supplies, which were now next to the tray. "Here."

She lay back and watched as Lexa moved on top of her, straddling her legs. Clarke looked up at her as she lifted her shirt just enough and put the bandage in place. Thankfully, there was no blood and there didn't appear to be an infection either.

"Is that okay?" Lexa asked. Clarke looked up at her and pulled at her shirt. Lexa smirked. "What?" She let her lift it all the way off.

"Lie on your back."

"Why?"

Clarke just glared at her. Lexa moved to her side and did as she was told. She thought about how no one ever tells her to do anything, but she let it leave her mind when she felt Clarke's fingers once again move up and down her back. She closed her eyes and turned her face away from Clarke.

"Tell me about this one." She slid her finger all the way up to the base of Lexa's neck and outlined the symbol there.

"It's the most sacred symbol of our people. The Commander gets it when they take power."

"What makes it sacred.?" Clarke asked and then felt bumps along the skin. "There's a scar here. What happened?"

"What do you know about our history?" She asked Clarke and turned to face her.

"Why don't you tell me about it?" She continued to glide her fingers over Lexa's skin while she relayed the story of the first Commander and the sacred symbol. Clarke's eyes grew heavy despite her desire to stay away. She knew she'd tired herself out and her hand slowed its movements against Lexa's skin; eventually stopping all together as Lexa rolled out from under it. She placed Clarke's hand closer to her body, slid her shirt back on and began placing Clarke's belongings around the room wherever they belonged before returning to the bathroom to ready herself for the rest of the day.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

"Clarke, wake up." Octavia's voice woke her from her not so restful slumber now that there were no meds involved.

"What's wrong?" Clarke asked as she lifted herself up. "Where's Lexa?"

"I don't know. Look, Murphy told me to tell you something before he left with Abby."

"What?"

"Why didn't you guys let me go back with Abby? Why him?"

"Octavia, what was the message?" Clarke prodded.

"Here." Octavia handed her a piece of folded up paper. "I guess he listened to Lexa because he felt responsible for what happened to you so he went with your mom, but I should be there, Clarke. I'm not doing anything here."

"No one's stopping you from going, Octavia." Clarke reminded her.

"Yeah, like it's that easy."

"I'm serious. If you want to go back to Arkadia and help there, I won't stop you. As soon as I'm healed, I'll be there too."

"You're coming back?" Octavia seemed perplexed.

Clarke held the piece of paper in her hand, looking at it curiously for a moment before returning Octavia's stare.

"I was on my way to you when this happened." Clarke explained.

Octavia sat on the edge of the bed.

"I didn't know."

"You thought I chose to stay with Lexa."

"Yeah, I heard you were shot, but no one really told me you were leaving before it happened."

"I guess no one knew besides Lexa."

"So, you two…"

Clarke didn't know how to answer her or really even what she was asking.

"We said our goodbyes."

Octavia took a moment to look down at her hands.

"I'm sorry I assumed you'd chosen to stay. I should have known better."

"It doesn't matter anymore." Clarke contended. "If you want to go to Arkadia now, you can. I can see about getting you a horse. I'm sure Lexa will-"

"You've so got her wrapped around your little finger, don't you? Commander of the 12 Clans-"  
"13." Clarke added.

Octavia let out a cocky smile.

"13 Clans. Whatever. Wrapped around Clarke Griffin's finger."

"It's not like that."

"Sure seems like that to anyone watching."

"That's how I ended up here, Octavia." Clarke referenced her injury.

"What do you mean?"  
"Titus assumed Lexa couldn't separate feelings from her job as Commander. He thought I needed to die for her to only focus on her people."

"Well, I hate to break it to you, Clarke, but as someone who Lexa tried to kill at least once that I know of and then could have killed a few days ago, I'd have to say that I agree with him."

"Octavia!"

"Not like that. I don't mean that she'd do anything you say. She hasn't. I just mean that you've saved me a couple of times by talking to her." She paused. "We don't always get the exact outcome we want." She looked at Clarke's stomach and nodded. "That's how I know she doesn't just do what you say. For what it's worth and it's probably not much, you two are good together." She stood. "I mean; I don't know what's going on with you two. I can guess, but that's not what I mean. You two work well together."

"Thanks, I guess." Clarke started to unfold the paper.

"So, what's Murphy's message? I'm surprised the guy can even write."

Clarke smiled at her as she started reading.

Clarke,

I'm writing this fast since your mom says we need to get back to Arkadia. I know something about these people. They're us or they're from us. It's hard to explain, but there's this room you should check out. That Titus guy held me there. Remember, the 13th station, the one they always talked about, but no one really knew what happened to it? Polaris? Polis, Clarke. Polis and Polaris. It's the same. Look, Abby's nodding at me. I'll go with her and keep her safe. I'll do my part. Some of this is my fault anyway. Just go to that room. Lexa probably knows what I'm talking about. There are paintings of their story. Their origin. This sounds crazy. Just trust me. And Clarke, I'm sorry.

Murphy

Clarke read it to herself as Octavia stared on.

"Um, Clarke. You wanna fill me in?"

"I don't really know what to fill you in on. It doesn't make any sense."

The heavy door swung open and Lexa dressed in full on Commander garb entered.

"Octavia." She greeted.

"Commander." Octavia stood and nodded in her direction.

She walked over to the other side of the bed and again found herself clasping her hands behind her back; not knowing how to react with someone in the room other than Clarke. Clarke wasn't really paying attention because she was rereading the note.

"Clarke, how are you feeling?" Lexa asked her.

"I'm fine."  
"Aren't you over saying that by now?" Octavia asked and sat in the chair next to the bed.

"Yes." Clarke replied and then finally looked up at Lexa. She didn't really know where to start. "Lexa, where did the name Polis come from?"

"What?"

"Where did it come from? You didn't mention it in your history."

"What history?" Octavia asked.

"It was on the side of a metal object. They didn't know what the object was, but it said Polis on the side. That's how the story goes at least."

"This this thing still around? In a room somewhere?"

"Yes, how did you know that?"  
"Can you take me there?"  
"Clarke, what's going on?" Lexa asked.

"Yeah, fill me in too."

"Can you take me there?" She repeated.

"When you're healed, we can-"  
"Not when I'm healed. Now."

"Clarke, your mom was pretty clear with me before she left." Octavia leaned in. "If Lexa couldn't keep you in line, I was supposed too."

"You think if she can't keep me in line, you'll be able too?" Clarke half-joked with Octavia.

"Well, I'm not sleeping with you, so-"

"Octavia!" Clarke yelled at her.

"What? Am I wrong?"

Lexa cleared her throat, but said nothing. She only stared at the floor.

"You should stay in bed for at least a few more days." Lexa said to Clarke after finally looking up at her.

"Both of you can blame me if my mother gets mad at you, but I can't stay here anymore. I'm going crazy and I feel fine. I'll take it easy, but Murphy thought this was important so I want to check it out."  
"Murphy thinks a lot of shit is important." Octavia retorted. "He isn't exactly trustworthy, Clarke."  
"Well, I can't find that out for myself unless I verify what's in his note." She held it up.

"Note?" Lexa queried. Clarke passed it over to her and Lexa knelt on the side of the bed as she read it to herself.

"And now I'm the only one that hasn't read the damn note I brought in." Octavia shared.

"Do you want to go back to Arkadia?" Clarke asked her. Octavia nodded. "Lexa?"

"Octavia is free to do as she pleases." Lexa answered without looking up from the note. "But you may want to remain here." She looked up at her.

"Why?"

"Because I know what he's talking about and I think Clarke's right. We should go there." Lexa responded.

"Good. Let's go." Clarke agreed.

"I meant Octavia and I. You should remain here." Lexa stood.

"Good luck with that." Octavia stood. "I'm happy to tag along, but you know as soon as we leave, she's going to hobble along behind us, right? Unless you chain her up or something."

"You planning on forcing me to stay here?" Clarke looked over at Lexa defiantly.

Lexa sighed.

"You remain by my side at all times and you walk slowly."

Octavia laughed.

"Told you." She held up her little finger and started walking toward the door. "Let's get this show on the road, ladies." She stopped and turned back around to check Lexa's reaction. "I know you're the Commander and all, but-"  
"It's fine, Octavia." Lexa started and moved to the other side of the bed to help Clarke up. "In here, it's fine."

"Understood." She nodded in Clarke's direction. "Need help?"

"No, I'm okay."

"I've got her." Lexa replied as Clarke stood up. "Slowly, Clarke."

"Sha, Heda." Clarke mocked.

Octavia waited for the two of them to pass her before following them out.

"I hope you don't call her that in bed." She muttered to herself and closed the door behind her.

_____

Lexa's guards kept a close watch on every person they walked past to ensure the safety of the trio. As they made their way through the crowd toward what Lexa called the underground, Clarke noticed the stares as she walked slower than most people would be walking. People had undoubtedly heard what happened or at least a variation of the story and they all knew who Wanheda was at this point. She heard whispers as Lexa walked by her side, but not touching her. She didn't want people to see Clarke as weak and Clarke appreciated that Lexa was allowing her to walk on her own despite the fact that she was in a little pain. The whispers spoke of Wanheda being the Commander of death, but also being able to control death now. She should have died, the whispers spoke, but she turned death away and returned to the living. She tried to block the whispers from her mind as Lexa motioned to the turn they should take.

"Not many people even know of this place. It's kind of a sanctuary for Commanders and those in the inner circle." Lexa explained.

"Like Titus?" Octavia questioned.

"Yes, but people rarely go in here and the Flamekeeper is responsible for maintaining the reverence of the space."

"So he could keep people out if he wanted to?" Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded and the three of them walked toward and then inside as Lexa told the guards to remain outside.

"Holy shit!" Octavia spoke loudly and rushed toward the metal object. "Clarke, it's a pod." She looked at the side and tried to clean off the black, but couldn't. "It's a pod from Polaris. It's the 13th Station."

Clarke slowly approached, but was also staring around the room at the paintings illuminated by candle light.

"This is your origin story?" Clarke asked Lexa.

"Yes." She replied and stood behind the two of them watching them admire the space.

"What is this doing here? Polaris was blown up. Someone must have escaped in the pod before that happened, Clarke. How did we not know about this?"

"I don't know. I don't think they'd want it passed down that they blew up a station. They never covered it in classes. It was always rumor."

"I wouldn't know. I didn't get to attend any classes, remember?" Octavia replied.

"Sorry." Clarke apologized. "Lexa, can you explain this?" Clarke turned around to look at her.

"I can, but you may not like it."

"What? Why not?" Clarke asked.

"Octavia, can we have the room please?" Lexa asked.

"Hell no. I want to hear this too." Octavia objected.

"Gon we, Octavia." Lexa's voice had changed. She was the Commander now.

Octavia was seething, but if she was truly Trikru, she knew she had to obey her Commander.

"I'll be outside." She took one last look around the room and walked out.

"Lexa, what's going on?" Clarke asked her and watched as Lexa moved beside her and stared up at the images on the wall.

"The Commanders speak to me in my dreams."

"I know." Clarke tried to understood Lexa's beliefs, but her experience with science in space had left her doubting. She at least respected them and hoped that was enough for Lexa.

"That is Becca." Lexa pointed at the image of a shadow figure in front of a mushroom cloud. "She was the first Commander." Lexa looked to Clarke who was still looking at the image. "Becca kom Skaikru." That got Clarke's attention and she turned her head quickly to Lexa.

"Lexa…"

"She fell from the sky a few years after the bombs." Lexa's eyes were trained on Clarke's and Clarke's bore into hers. "She grouped the survivors; the first grounders as your people call us together and formed the new world. She became the first Commander."

"You knew she came from a space station? Do your people know this?"

"No. Only I know. The former Commanders knew as well."

"How?" Clarke questioned.

"Presh memon-de." Lexa answered. She pulled her hair to the side and turned slightly to reveal her tattoo.

"The sacred symbol?"

"When I was chosen by the Commander's spirit to be the next leader of my people, I was given the symbol as well as a gift."

"What gift?"

She ran her hand over her scar.

"The spirit of all Commanders who came before me."

Clarke ran her fingers over the mark.

"They put something inside you?"

"Yes, the Commander's spirit. It's how I know more of our past than anyone. It's how I received the warning from them of my death." She turned back around and released her hair. "Although, it seems you prevented that." She looked down. "At least for now."

"Lexa, what is inside you? What did they put in there? Who put it in there?"

"It is the Flamekeeper's duty. I told you, Clarke. It's the spirit-"  
"I know that. I mean what is it specifically?"

"I don't know what you mean?"

"Lexa, there's something foreign inside your body and you don't know what it is?"  
"I didn't question the Commander that came before me, Clarke. I didn't question my teacher when he placed it either."

Clarke knew she wouldn't get through to her about this now. She changed the subject.

"What else do you know?"

"Things come to me from the Commanders sometimes. It happens in spurts and when it's necessary." She pointed to the pod. "I recall our city being named Polis because of that."

"Lexa, that's Polaris. That's from the Ark." Clarke moved toward the pod. "It's burned, but that's one of our escape pods."

"Yes, Becca took it down before the explosion."

"You know about the explosion?"

"I know about it because you and Octavia just told me."

Clarke shook her head.

"I'm sorry. I'm trying to wrap my head around this." She looked at the images and then back at Lexa's whose eyes were reflecting the flickering of the candles around them. "How long have you known this? That we were connected like this; Sky People and Ground People?"

"Not long. I told you. I only get things in short bursts. The day you were shot… she started. When you walked in and I was on the floor…"

"That's when?"

"That's when Becca told me her story, yes. You interrupted so I didn't hear much beyond what I've already told you."

Clarke took a deep breath.

"You said I wouldn't like what you had to tell me." Clarke reminded her of her earlier comment.

"I only came to understand the connection between our people the other day, that's true, but I've known you were out there for much longer."

"What do you mean?"

"The Commanders shared with me the knowledge of ships in the sky when I became Commander. When you landed on the ground, I already knew of the existence of your Ark." She gulped. "Clarke, the Commanders told me you were special."

"What?" Clarke asked.

"I heard them the day you and I met. After we met for the first time." She paused and took Clarke's hand, which Clarke wasn't expecting. She watched as Lexa put her other hand on top of it as well and began running her fingers over Clarke's skin. "They told me to trust you. They were the reason I did… trust you… then."

"They told you to trust me?"

"You would help lead me and my people to a new age."

"That's why you trusted me? A voice in your head told you too?" Clarke was sure she'd never been more confused.

"To you, it seems crazy, but to me, it's normal, Clarke. This is what it means to be Commander. We accept the lives of the past Commanders into our own and we listen as they advise us. They advised me to trust you. I did and they were right."

"How far does that go, Lexa?" Clarke pulled back her hand.

"I don't understand."

"Did they tell you to care about me back then? When you kissed me the first time?"

"What? No."

"What about loving me? Did they tell you to-"  
Lexa cupped Clarke's face in her hands and stared into her eyes.

"No one told me to love you, Clarke." She paused. "That's not how it works. I love you because I love you. I love you because…" She dropped her hands to her sides before taking Clarke's hands in them and holding them between them. "Because you are special. You are strong and brave and you put your people above all else; including yourself. You took the pain of Mount Weather on yourself to save those you cared about. You continue to fight even when you should rest. You…" She took a deep breath. "You see me, Clarke." She took a step closer. "You see me as more than a Commander of an army. You see me as… a woman."

"Lexa, this is a lot."

"Clarke, the words I hear from the Commanders, they're just words. I choose my actions. They don't dictate my decisions. They advise me. Sometimes, I listen to them. Sometimes, I don't."

"Give me an example of when you didn't listen to them, Lexa because the thought of you having voices tell you-"  
"You." She put her hands on Clarke's waist. "You are an example of me not listening to them."

"You just said-"  
"I said they told me to trust you and I did. They were right, but they never told me to fall in love with you. They told me to turn off my emotions, to push my feelings away. To be Commander is to be alone. That is the way. Titus reminded me of that several times, but I could not turn my feelings off, Clarke. I am human. All Commanders are."

"Love is weakness?" Clarke mostly whispered.

"Is the mantra we are given as young Nightbloods and when we are made Commander."

"Then, why?"

"I told you. I choose my actions. I chose you, Clarke. I want you." She repeated Clarke's words.

Clarke took a deep breath.

"I need to know more."

"I will share with you what I know from now on as it is revealed to me."

Clarke let go of Lexa's hands to look around the room once more.

"Lexa, we come from the same place; all the clans. This matters. This has to be shared with everyone. This can end the war."

"Clarke, the knowledge of our shared history is not enough to undo nearly 100 years of blood must have blood."

"But it couldn't hurt."

"My people have strong beliefs. You'd be asking them to reconsider those right at the time I'm asking them to give peace a chance."

"That's a lot of change." Clarke continued Lexa's thought.

"Yes and my people aren't used to change. They are proud of our ways even if those ways often end in death." She watched as Clarke turned back to her. "Change takes time, Clarke."

"It was a mistake sending Murphy to Arkadia. He should be here." Clarke offered. "I want to know what he knows about the City of Light."

"The what?" Lexa asked while looking down at the ground.

"The City of Light." Clarke motioned outside. "Octavia can fill us in a little, but Murphy was with Jaha. He'll know more. We should send for him."

"We should get you back to bed. You should rest."

"Octavia is going to want answers, Lexa and she deserves them."

"You can tell Octavia whatever you want, Clarke. I just wanted the opportunity to explain myself to you and you alone."

"We should head back." Clarke walked past her and Lexa reached for her hand.

"Clarke…"

Clarke stopped and turned to her.

"We're okay." She put her hand on Lexa's cheek. "I understand. It just takes some getting used too, but we're okay." Clarke reassured her.

Lexa put her head down for a moment before lifting it back up.

"We can talk to Octavia when we return. We'll send her for Murphy. She's been wanting to get back to Arkadia anyway. When he returns, you and I can meet with him to understand this City of Light." Lexa offered and began walking out with Clarke beside her.

"Lexa, swear to me you'll tell me if the Commanders speak to you from now on." Clarke requested.

"Ai swega em kiln." I swear it.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

Clarke filled Octavia in on the shared history of the Sky People and the clans, but left out the part about Lexa having something inside her because Clarke didn't fully understand it enough to attempt to explain it and she tried to polish the whole voices inside Lexa's head thing while Octavia sat on the edge of her bed and Lexa was off speaking to the other ambassadors about the kill order remaining postponed. Apparently, they were not too happy about the fact that it had yet to go into effect and the army had reported back to them that it looked like Arkadia was preparing for battle. It seemed that the war they'd been trying to prevent was about to get started.

"So, you want me to go to Arkadia, sneak in, pull Murphy out and send him back here?" Octavia clarified.

"Yes."

"How is it that he is suddenly so important?"

"He spent time with Jaha. He knows things, Octavia. I need to know those things. It might be the only way we can prevent a war."

"Aren't we all somehow connected to Becca? Can't that prevent a war? We're all Skaikru technically."

"I wish it was that simple."

"So do I." Octavia stood. "I leave tonight. It'll be easier to get through in the dark. Do me a favor though. Radio Indra and tell her I'm coming." She started walking toward the door. "I can't believe we haven't heard from Kane yet. Something's gotta be up and you know it's not good."

"Find out for me. I'll let Indra know you're on your way and Octavia?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

She nodded and left the room.

Clarke tried to eat the food that had been again brought to her, but she was having a hard time processing her thoughts and it sat to instead get cold. She didn't fully grasp the idea of the Commanders speaking to Lexa and knew there was something inside her too. She didn't know how those two things were connected, but she felt that they were. She also felt like Lexa was being truthful earlier. She did love her. There wasn't anything or anyone driving her emotions. She trusted that, but without understanding everything, things were somehow less clear than before.

She fell asleep after reconnecting her IV and injecting the medication Abby had left behind. As much as she wanted to remain awake, she knew she needed the drugs to prevent infection and she also needed restful sleep, which wouldn't come without them.

_____

When she woke up, it was again evening and she could feel Lexa beside her. She turned her head to the side to see that her war paint had been removed and she had changed out of her Commander gear.

"Hi." Clarke greeted.

"Hi." Lexa replied with a grin. "How are you?" She asked and brushed Clarke's hair out of her eyes. Clarke reached over and removed the IV. It hurt for a moment, but as she sat up, she felt very little pain in her abdomen. "Take it easy." Lexa advised while sitting up as well. "I had the healer examine your wound. He was surprised at how quickly it's healing."

"Our medicine is different than yours." Clarke told her and reached for her shirt to pull it up and felt Lexa's hand move to the bandage. She peeled back the tape gently for her and they both noticed that the wound appeared to be nearly healed. "Maybe one day our doctors and your healers can meet and trade secrets." Clarke offered while Lexa went to reapply the bandage. "No, it's okay. Take it off." Clarke helped peel away the material. "It should breathe now."

She took the bandage and set it on the table next to her water, which she picked up and took a long drink from. "I am so tired of this bed." She sat the cup back down and turned toward Lexa.

"That's disappointing." Lexa replied with a smile.

"You know what I mean." Clarke replied with a similar smile. "Now, tell me about the ambassadors."

"What about them?"

"You met with them. What happened?"

"Octavia left to retrieve Murphy. He should return by morning. Indra is expecting her and will ensure her safety through the blockade."

"And the ambassadors?" Clarke continued to prod.

"Want the kill order to go into effect." Lexa finally responded to her question.

"And is it?"

"Arkadia is preparing for war, Clarke. We cannot get in contact with Kane and there's only so much your mother can do considering she's no longer in charge."

"So, it is?"

"I had no choice."

Clarke stared at her for a moment.

"I understand." Clarke turned away from her. "So, when do I leave?"

"You know the answer to that."

"And you know I can't stay if-"

Lexa sat up fully and turned toward her.

"It's not the same as before, Clarke." She expressed.

"Because I got shot?"  
Lexa stared at her with kind eyes.

"No."

"Lexa…"

Lexa moved to straddle her, but did so carefully.

"Stay. I am asking you to stay." She wrapped her arms around Clarke's neck. "You are the ambassador. You can do more here for your people than there."

"I shouldn't be here if they're all trapped there."

"I've delayed the kill order for one more day. It's enough time to Murphy to return, give you the information you seek and ride back quickly before it goes into effect."

"I'll return with him then." Clarke's arms remained at her side, but she stared up at Lexa.

"You're looking at me differently now." Lexa tried to climb off her. Clarke's arms moved to her hips to hold her in place.

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are. You're worried about the Commander's voices." She moved off of her despite the fact that it was the last thing she wanted to do. "You wish to return to Arkadia."

"Because it's what I need to do, Lexa. It has nothing to do with you." Clarke turned to look at her. "You were fine with it before this happened." She motioned to her wound before rolling on her side; surprised that it didn't hurt to do so.

"I wasn't fine, Clarke. I had to let you go." Lexa didn't look at her. She moved to climb out of the bed, but Clarke connected their hands and pulled her back toward her.

"I don't understand it, Lexa. The Commanders. The voices. It confuses me. That's all." She cupped Lexa's cheek with her hand and slid closer to her. "But it doesn't change how I feel about you. It doesn't change what's happened between us these past few days."

"It will. If you leave, Pike will arrest you. He might do worse, Clarke."

"He won't kill me. It doesn't serve his purpose."

"He hates my people. It's no secret that you seek an alliance with us; that you desire Skaikru to be the 13th clan. He will do whatever it takes to prevent that from happening and remember, Clarke." Lexa's arm went to Clarke's waist. "You are special. People follow you. He understands that."

"I'll take care of Pike."

"Forget everything else then." Lexa started and Clarke could tell she was about to say something that the Commander in her would never say. "How am I supposed to say goodbye to you again?" She choked out the last few words. Clarke stared at her for a moment before moving her body on top of hers.

"It's not goodbye." Clarke reminded her. "I will be back."  
"When?" Lexa wrapped her arms around Clarke's waste and stationed them on her lower back, lifting the shirt a little as she did so.

"I don't know."

"I can't protect you with the kill order in place. Once you're there, there's nothing I can do without resending the order and-"  
"You couldn't do that just for me. I know." Clarke leaned down. "Murphy won't be back until tomorrow morning." She pressed her lips to Lexa's neck. "We can stay like this all night." She grazed the girl's skin with her teeth lightly and felt her shudder beneath her.

"You shouldn't."

"Our medicine is different than yours, remember? I feel fine." She pressed her lips just below her earlobe and felt Lexa's hands moving up and down her back under her shirt. "Can we please do something in this bed other than sleep?"

That's all it took before Lexa pulled at her shirt and lifted it off her body. Clarke's lips met Lexa's and as much as Lexa tried to take it slow, still being worried about Clarke's injury, that's how fast Clarke tried to go. Lexa grew frustrated with the girl on top of her and Clarke smirked at her for a moment before she felt her body being rolled over and watched as Lexa climbed on top of her and removed her shirt at the same time.

"You still need to take it easy." Lexa warned before reaching for Clarke's pants.

Clarke smiled at her while she watched Lexa remove her clothing first before climbing out of her own and moving back on top of her.

"Are you ever going to believe that I'm okay again?" Clarke asked her while Lexa's lips assaulted her neck and she wrapped her arms around her back.

"I will." Lexa lifted her head and kissed her lips gently. "When you actually are."

"I'm-" Clarke tried.

"Shhh…" Lexa quieted and slid her hand between Clarke's legs.

_____

Clarke woke before Lexa. She watched her naked form sleep for several moments knowing that this would be the last time she'd be waking up next to her for a while; possibly forever depending on how things go. The decision between the woman she loved and the people she swore to protect weighed heavily on her. Her only hope was that they'd both survive whatever was coming and they'd eventually get to the point where one day they'd both owe nothing more to their people. She'd uttered those words before. She'd said them hopefully, but doubtfully to Lexa while standing in front of her wishing she didn't have to say them; wishing she could just tell her how she felt. Instead, she decided to show her.

She moved slowly out of the bed and threw on some clothes just to cover her body, but not prepare for her journey. She took a last look at Lexa who'd moved her body to fill the void Clarke had just left. Clarke smiled and walked toward the doors. She pulled one open slowly so as not to wake her and closed it just as slowly. She nodded toward one of the guards and started walking off toward her old room. A guard followed closely behind. She didn't have to question him. She knew Lexa had instructed him to keep an eye on her for her protection. When she arrived at the door to her old room, she hesitated before opening it. She hadn't been back in the room since the shooting. The guard actually took a step in front of her once the door was opened and inspected the room for her before she followed him in. It was empty. He took steps back and nodded before closing the door; leaving her alone in the space.

She walked to her bed and noticed it had been cleaned. She didn't know what she expected. She should have known Lexa would have sent someone to clean the blood and everything else off the bed so Clarke wouldn't have to see it. She turned around and noticed that the cracked walls; still damaged from the bombs nearly a century ago, now had some additional holes in them from Titus's bullets. She ran her fingers along the walls before turning to see the sun rising in the sky. She walked out onto the balcony and looked over Polis.

"Reconsidering your decision to leave?" She heard Lexa's voice and the door close behind her.

"Lexa…" Clarke didn't turn around, but she did hang her head down until she felt Lexa's arms wrap around her waist. She placed her hands on top of them and felt her rest her head on her shoulder.

"I know." Lexa paused. "It is beautiful though, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is." Clarke replied. She wasn't really referring to Polis, which was just waking up to start its day. She was talking about what they had managed to build between them. She felt that Lexa probably understood that without her needing to explain herself.

"Do you want to be alone?" Lexa asked her.

"No, I just needed to come back in here before I leave."

"Can we not talk about that part yet?" Lexa asked and kissed her shoulder through her shirt.

They heard the door open behind them and Lexa quickly removed herself from Clarke. They both turned around to see the guard letting Murphy into the room.

"Someone tell this guy I'm supposed to be here." He pointed at the guard who apparently he'd pushed past to get into the room.

"Heda?"

"It's fine. Leave us." Lexa told the guard and he closed the door leaving Murphy in the room with them.

"You rang?" Murphy offered sardonically.

"Thanks for coming back." Clarke told him and left the balcony. Lexa followed her reluctantly. She knew once they got what they needed from Murphy, he and Clarke would be leaving and she'd be alone again. She'd gotten used to being alone before Costia and then again after. She'd come to believe Titus when he said love was weakness and the other Commanders that said she was meant to be alone to lead her people. Then, Clarke entered her life and there was a ray of hope that came with her. After the mountain though, she'd lost her again and while she knew she was on the run and sent people to try to find her to prevent Azgeda from getting their hands on Wanheda, she really did it to prevent anyone from harming Clarke. It took them time to get back to this place.

She knew Clarke would hate her after the mountain and that was confirmed when Clarke spat in her face and pledged to kill her. As she watched Clarke now sitting across from Murphy on the small sofa in her old room, she couldn't believe that they were here and she worried about what might happen when Clarke left. She'd be alone again and she'd miss her, but the people of the Ark had a way of somehow always pitting them against one another and putting doubts in her mind about Lexa's loyalty. Up until recently, Octavia was one of those people.

She walked to sit down next to Clarke and before she realized what she was doing, she took her hand in her own causing Clarke to look at her with surprise. Murphy didn't seem to notice or care, but Clarke knew that Lexa rarely showed affection in the presence of others. She nodded at her and squeezed her hand before returning to Murphy.

"Murphy, I need you to tell us about the City of Light."

"That crap Jaha's been shouting? Really?"

"Yes." Clarke replied and pulled Lexa's hand into her lap.

"Look, it's all AI. There's this Alie chick. She's the reason the world went to shit and we ended up on the Ark."

"What do you mean?" Clarke asked him.

"I don't know the whole story, but based on what was were told on the Ark, what Jaha's been doing and what I saw in that room, I'd say Alie was the AI that dropped the bombs on the planet. The stations in space at the time all got together after that and before Polaris could join up, someone took the escape pod and booked it toward earth. Jaha's been walking around getting people to take some chip that connects them to Alie and I don't know what she's trying to do, but I don't trust her and I don't trust people who are connected to her."

"Her?" Lexa questioned.

"Yeah, she appears like a woman. My guess is that's who created her and that she's the one that escaped in the Polaris pod. She came down here, started a new world and now you're in charge of it." He nodded toward Lexa. "Alie is looking for something. She has been for a while now is my guess. Jaha is on some quest to help her with whatever she wants because the chip is the City of Light. There's no pain, no death, blah, blah, blah."

"What is she looking for?" Clarke asked.

"Murphy, that will be all." Lexa let go of Clarke's hand and stood abruptly.

"Lexa!" Clarke stood next to her.

"You should prepare for your journey back. I need to speak with Clarke."  
Murphy stood.

"Journey back? I just got here. What the hell, Clarke?"

"The kill order's back on, Murphy. We have to go back to Arkadia."

"I barely got out of there this time. Not like people there are actually excited to see me. Jaha had to convince them to even let me stay and he's still trying to get me to download Alie into my brain. I thought I was staying here."

"We'll be fine." Clarke tried to tell him, but was focused on Lexa.

"What's the point of having a Commander girlfriend if she can't save your life, Clarke?"

"Enough!" Lexa yelled at him. "Leave us."

"Murphy, go. I'll find you when I'm ready."

"Fine. This is stupid though." He backed his way out of the room.

"Lexa, what the hell?" Clarke asked her the moment the door was closed and they were again alone. "He was giving us information we need if we're going to take out Pike and figure out what this Alie thing is after."

"I already know what she's after, Clarke." Lexa stood stoically. She looked calm as she so often did.

"What?"

"Me." Lexa stated. "She's after… me."

"Lexa, what are you talking about?" Clarke took a step away from her instinctively.

"I swore to you that I would tell you when the Commanders speak to me, but I never swore to let Murphy in on that information."

"Okay. Just tell me what they told you then."

"That's all I know. I need to convene with the Commanders to learn more." She replied.

"What do you mean that's all you know?" Clarke asked and then took a step back toward her. "Lexa, talk to me."

"Clarke, you don't understand how this works. I cannot control when they speak to me and what they choose to tell me. While Murphy was talking about Alie, they said she was after me. That's how it happens when I am unfocused. When I am not attempting to reach out to them or I'm not asleep when they can easily speak to me without my interference."

"And when Murphy was talking…"  
"I heard a voice tell me the thing Alie is after is me." She finished. "Is inside me."

"Inside you?" Clarke checked.

"Yes, beneath the sacred symbol."

Clarke knew she had to say something she never thought she'd say.

"Lexa, we need to talk to Titus."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

"Titus has been banished. We have no way of knowing where he is." Lexa explained while walking toward the door.

"You're telling me you didn't have someone follow him to make sure he left?"

Lexa gripped the door knob and turned it.

"Yes, but that was days ago, Clarke."

"Send someone off in that direction then. Lexa, we need to talk to the Flamekeeper."

"He tried to kill you, Clarke!" She yelled as she turned back to face her. "He shot you! I watched you bleed on the floor, gasping for breath and you want me to bring him back here?"

Clarke stood silent. She wasn't prepared for that outburst.

"Lexa, I'm okay."  
"Stop saying you're okay!" Lexa closed the door again so the guards wouldn't see them arguing. Although Clarke doubted the door would block out the sound of Lexa's words. "I felt your blood on my hands. I held my hands over a hole in your body to try to keep it inside while he stood there because he knew he almost hit me. He wasn't apologizing for shooting you, Clarke. He was apologizing because you saved him from murdering his Commander. I had to lie by your side and constantly watch to make sure you were still breathing. You have no idea what that is like."

"Yes, I do." Clarke said quietly. Lexa just stared at her. "When you fought Roan. What do you think that was like for me?" Clarke took a step toward her. "I tried to convince you not to fight, but you had to do it. I tried to convince him to work with me and when all hope was lost, I stood there and watched him nearly kill you. I could do nothing. What do you think that was like?"

Lexa lowered her head.

"I didn't know."

"Didn't know what?" Clarke turned and faced the balcony before turning back toward her.

"I didn't know how you felt then." Lexa responded. "I thought you needed assurances that your people would be taken care of."  
"Lexa…" Clarke walked toward her and put her hands on her face, holding it in place, forcing her to look her in the eye. "For someone so smart, you are so stupid sometimes." She smiled at her and Lexa laughed mildly. "This whole time… ever since you knelt down in front of me, ever since I took your hand to make you stand back up, I knew it was you that I wanted… beyond what my people may need from a Commander. I needed you and I knew it then. So, yes. I do know what it's like to watch someone you love nearly die. I'm Wanheda. I know the feeling all too well." She pulled her hands away.

"You're leaving, Clarke. You'll be gone by the time Titus is returned." Lexa stated after several moments of silence while they stared at each other.

"Can you postpone the kill order again?"

"That would not be wise. The ambassadors are already angry it's taken this long for it to go into effect. They're already beginning to question me."

"I'll go after Titus. I can take Murphy. Your people will be focused on Arkadia and your lands. Titus is already beyond them. I'll find him and bring him back in secret."

"I will not send you to the man that nearly killed you. You cannot ask me to do that." Lexa retorted frustrated.

"He won't try to kill me again, Lexa. He knows there's no point."

"Beja, Clarke. Sen ai op." Listen to me, she begged. "Ai nou na teik yo dole daun."

"Yes, you can. You can let me do that."

"No, I can't. I won't." She reached for the door knob again. "You and Murphy will stay here. I will convene with the Commanders and hopefully they will grant my request for information. I'll send riders to locate Titus and return him here, but I cannot let you go find him."

"What about the kill order? Arkadia?"

"You'll stay here, Clarke."

"Lexa, you can't just keep me here. This can't be about us."  
"It's not about you and I." She released the knob and turned to face her. "I promised Abby I would protect you and sending you to find the man that tried to kill you is not protecting you. If you still desire to return to Arkadia after we find Titus and learn what information we can from him, we will sneak you in in secret."

"And what am I supposed to do in the meantime? What about Murphy?"

"You'll stay out of sight. I'll send Murphy back."

"We may need him." Clarke retorted. "He may have more information."

"He doesn't."

"How do you know?"  
"Because I know, Clarke!" She yelled. "He will return to Arkadia and we will tell the ambassadors that you returned with him. You will remain here for your safety until Titus arrives and once we have the information from him, I will banish him once more and you and I can make a plan to bring down your corrupt leaders and attempt a peace between our people again."

"So, I'm a prisoner… again?" Clarke walked backwards toward her bed. "We're back here after everything?"

"You are not a prisoner, Clarke." Lexa walked toward her. "You are free to leave whenever you wish as always, but I am begging you to trust me." She was calmer now. "I trust you always. Please trust me now."

Clarke thought about her options. She could return to Arkadia with Murphy, but she'd miss whatever information Titus could provide about what was inside Lexa. She could go after Titus herself, but she knew it would break Lexa's heart and she could stay here and wait, which appeared to be the easiest option for everyone, which is probably why her brain was disagreeing with it. Easy hadn't worked on earth since they landed. She did, however, owe Lexa her trust.

"I'll stay until Titus returns and we have a chance to talk."

"Thank you." Lexa replied and walked toward the door again to turn the knob. When the door was opened, she turned to allow Clarke to walk through it first, but Clarke remained near her old bed with her arms crossed.

"I'm staying in here."

"Why?" Lexa asked.

"Because the fewer people that see me after Murphy leaves, the better."

"You can stay with me. I'll make sure the guards-"

"It's better if I stay in here."

"This is where it happened."

"It's a room, Lexa. It doesn't hold any power over me." She started to walk toward the balcony. "You should go."

"I'll return after Murphy leaves and I send riders for Titus."

"No."

"Clarke-"

"We shouldn't be seen together. People need to think I left. If you come in here all the time, they'll know I'm still here."

"So, you don't want to see me?"

"You said it yourself. This isn't about us." Clarke nodded toward the door. "I'll stay in here. Let me know when you find Titus."

She walked back onto the balcony knowing she wouldn't be able to stand out there once Murphy was gone and the people of Polis thought she'd gone with him.

"I love you." Lexa stated almost quietly enough for Clarke to have missed it, but she heard it and by the time she'd turned around, the door was closed and Lexa was gone.

_____

"Wanheda has returned to Arkadia with the remaining members of Skaikru." Lexa began an introduction to her ambassadors immediately after entering the hall. She rushed toward her throne and stood in front of it, turning all in one movement. "It has been brought to my attention that the Flamekeeper has information we need to obtain the peace we all seek." She continued. There were grumbles, but she ignored them. "If Jus nou drein jus daun is to become our way, we must have him return briefly to be interrogated."

"You sent him away before learning this information?"

"We were not aware he possessed information we needed until now."

"We?" A second ambassador questioned.

"Wanheda and I." Lexa replied honestly.

There were more grumbles.

"Wanheda has left Polis."

"She has, but this information will assist us in building peace with the Skaikru as they work to change their leadership." She looked around the room for a moment. "I'm sending riders to return Titus to me. I will interrogate him and learn what he knows before he will once again be banished. You should return to your people. Tell them that the kill order is in effect and if a member of Skaikru steps foot on their lands outside of Arkadia, their Commander instructs them to kill them." She hated having to say this about Clarke's people, but she showed no emotion as she delivered the words to her ambassadors who were already questioning her relationship with Wanheda. "Once Pike and the others are dealt with, we will welcome Skaikru back to this coalition and have peace." She didn't wait for a response. "Gon we."

They nodded at her and each began to walk out of the room. Lexa sat back on her throne and looked to her right. So recently, Titus had stood there and defended her, but it was Clarke's position that she stared at now. Just a little further off to the right. Indra may have been her second in tradition and law, but Clarke had taken over that role long ago.

_____

She knew she shouldn't return to Clarke's room. Despite the fact that she knew she could control her guards and keep them from spreading the truth that Clarke remained behind, she also knew Clarke was right. The more she was seen in that room or not seen at all, people would begin to wonder. They would begin to talk.

She returned to her own room instead, feeling it already empty since Clarke was not there waiting for her as she had been the past several days. She removed her makeup and changed her clothes. She did her best to push Clarke out of her mind as she sat on the floor in front of her bed once more to convene with the Commanders of old and learn what they would allow her to learn.

Her eyes closed and her mind was at rest when the first burst entered her mind.

It was like a lightning bolt. No, it was like many lightning bolts firing in her brain at one time. Her mind was trying to interpret the meaning behind the images. There were no voices to explain them. A woman with dark hair outside of a ship. Polaris. A scar on her neck. A symbol on her suit. Commander label on the front. A meeting between the woman and survivors. They were speaking. No, she was speaking to them, but Lexa couldn't make out what they were saying. There was no sound. She was in a room by herself now. Her hair was pulled back. She was looking in a mirror at the scar, which was healed. She was older now. Not much. Maybe a few years. Her hair was different. It was braided. She was wearing black and smearing paint over her face. The first Commander. There was a man with her. He was standing by her side in the assembly hall; in her room. The first Flamekeeper. A battle. The Commander's dead. The Flamekeeper is standing over her. He has a knife. Her body is lifeless and is rolled over. The scar is opened. More images rush into her brain in rapid succession. Lexa's eyes popped opened. She stood and grasped at the scar on her neck. She understood now.

_____

The heavy doors to Clarke's room were opened and she jolted upright in bed.

"Lexa, what-"

"I know what it is."

"Know what what is?" Clarke stood, but regretted it as she moved too quickly and felt pain in her abdomen causing her to have to sit back down. Lexa moved to her side.

"Are you okay?"

"I just moved too fast. I thought we agreed you'd stay away."

"No one knows I'm here. The guards at your door were moved to give the illusion that you were gone. I dismissed my guards before I came here."

"That's not the point."

Lexa stood in front of a sitting Clarke.

"Clarke, this is my faith; my belief. It's all I've ever known."

"What are you talking about?" Clarke wiped at her sleepy eyes.  
Lexa sat beside her. She looked exhausted.

"What's inside me isn't the spirit of Commanders."

Clarke didn't respond. That was something she already understood. She just reached over and took Lexa's hand in hers and watched as the girl stared at them linked together.

"It's okay." Clarke comforted. "Titus will-"

"We don't need Titus."

"What did you learn?" Clarke turned to face her and disconnected their hands.

"The City of Light, Alie, the chip, it was the first, but it wasn't the last." Lexa tried to explain.

"You're not making any sense."

"She wants the second."  
"Lexa-"

"It's still coming to me. I can't." She looked down and shook her head. Clarke wasn't sure what was happening to her, but she was worried. "It's like I'm processing it all at once."

"Hey, look at me." Clarke lifted Lexa's head. "Come here. Lie down."  
"If I sleep, it will get worse."

"Just lie down." Clarke slid down so she was lying and motioned for Lexa to climb on top of her. Lexa resisted at first, but then Clarke's arms opened and she pulled the girl so she was lying half on top of her and her arms wrapped around Lexa's back. "Take your time. Tell me what you know."

"I thought you were mad at me." Lexa placed her hand on Clarke's neck and slid her fingers over the girl's skin.

"I wasn't mad. I just…" She thought about how best to say what she wanted to say and then remembered that she should just be honest with Lexa now that they were beyond the passive aggressive, not sharing how they really felt stage in their relationship. "You're frustrating sometimes." Clarke's hands went under Lexa's shirt and stilled against her skin.

Lexa smirked.

"I know. So are you." Lexa replied. Clarke smiled and moved her hands slowly up and down the girl's back. "I can't seem to stay away from you though."

"Tell me what happened."

"We're were told stories of our origin and I believed them, but today the Commanders-" She stopped. She nuzzled her face into Clarke's neck. "It's a machine."

"What is?" Clarke asked her.

"Murphy was right. The first Commander was the inventor of the thing that caused the bombs." She paused for a moment. "She regretted what happened. I couldn't see it, but I could feel it. I could feel her, Clarke. When she landed on earth and saw the destruction she'd caused, she hated herself. She wanted to do something to fix it so she started a civilization."

"Go on."

"She had something in her neck too. When we become Commander, it's placed inside us, but we're told it's the spirit of the past Commanders. We believe they guide us to make the right decision for our people."

"But it's not." Clarke soothed her by continuing to hold her close.

"It's a machine. It's something from your Ark. It's-"

"AI. Artificial intelligence." Clarke finished for her.

"Yes." Lexa sounded defeated. "All this time I've believed in them."

Clarke hugged her closer.

"I know." She pushed at Lexa a little to get her to shift her position, which she did. Clarke rolled on her side to face her and brushed the hair out of the girl's eyes as she lay in front of her. "Did I ever tell you the whole story of what happened to my dad?"  
"No, but we haven't really talked about our families, have we?"

"I guess not."

"Tell me now." Lexa put her hand on Clarke's hip.

"My dad discovered something on the Ark. We were running out of clean air among other things and he wanted to warn people. He thought it was the right thing to do. Kane and Jaha disagreed." She paused. "Before they floated my dad, before they arrested him and then arrested me for supporting him, I believed in them. I had no reason not too. Jaha's son and I were friends. I spent time in their home. He was our Chancellor. He had our best interest at heart, but the day my dad lost his life was the day my whole outlook changed." She cupped Lexa's face with her hand. "My whole world was different. I couldn't be floated because I was under 18, but they locked me up and I spent a year in solitary before they sent 100 of us down in a ship to see if this place was habitable."

"How have you not told me this before?" Lexa looked surprised.

"Because you're always too busy talking about your death." Clarke tried a joke. Lexa smiled.

"I'm sorry." She offered.

"We were an experiment. They didn't know if we'd survive. My mom orchestrated the whole thing. The day I found out, my world changed again. I'd lost my father and then I'd lost my mother. We had nothing when we first got here. We had a broken ship and the possibility of supplies hidden in a mountain. We'd believed in our leaders, in our parents, but we were on our own to make a new world."

"You had no idea we were here?"

"No, we were told survival would have been impossible. We thought we were the first people on earth in almost 100 years until Jasper took a spear to the chest."

"One of my people?"

"Yes." Clarke answered her. "You may not have Commanders in your dreams anymore and we'll figure out everything else, but you are strong, Lexa. You already changed your outlook on blood must have blood. Your teachers may have been wrong, but that doesn't change anything. You're still you. You're still the Commander. You have the chance to tell your people the truth if you want or to allow them to continue to believe what they've always believed."

"What do I do?" She asked her while closing her eyes briefly. Clarke leaned forward and pressed her lips against hers gently.

"It's not my decision to make. You will make the right decision though. Noun, fiyanes, en uf."

Lexa opened her eyes and glared at her confused.

"The three pillars of the Commander?"

"You have them, Lexa. You will make the right decision for your people and you will bring peace to my people and your people."

Lexa closed her eyes again.

"Can I sleep in here tonight?" She asked. "I would feel better if-"

"Yes." Clarke replied.

Lexa moved back to her previous position and Clarke wrapped her arms around her.

"Clarke?"  
"Mm?" She mumbled in reply.

"I think I want it out of me."

Clarke's eyes opened.

"We'll talk to Titus when he gets here." She ran her hands up and down her back again. "We have to make sure it's safe."

"What if I'm no longer the Commander when it's gone?"

"You told me they advise you, but you make your own decisions."

"That's true."

"Then, regardless of what that thing is or does, you've always been the Commander and always will be." She kissed her forehead. "Sleep. I'll be here."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

"Octavia, Indra, anyone?" Clarke spoke into the radio while sitting on the edge of her bed alone in her room. She'd been repeatedly trying to contact anyone at Arkadia and every so often for the past day. She tried again to no avail. Lexa had spent the previous day in Polis trying to meet with the people and explain the peace she so desperately sought. She held an assembly, she met with advisors and warriors alike. She spent the night alone so as to continue the façade of Clarke being gone. Clarke remained in her room and was growing restless. Lexa would drop by with food and supplies, but never remained long because she was needed elsewhere and Clarke understood, but she needed to know what was going on. She'd grown more and more worried about Arkadia since no one had been able to reach Kane and since she'd gotten a hold of the radio, she'd only heard static in reply. The door swung open and Lexa entered, walking quickly. The door remained opened behind her. "Lexa, close the-" She stopped herself when she watched Titus walk into the room. He was covered with sweat and dirt and was wearing the same robes she'd last seen him in. She instinctively recoiled as his eyes went to one of the bullet holes still in the wall.

"Clarke, Titus was located and returned to you by your request." Lexa spoke in her Commander tone. "He understands that if he utters a word about you being here, he will pay with his life."

"Wanheda, I wish to apo-"

"Don't." Clarke stopped him and stood. She sat the radio down on the table and walked toward them. "We both know you wouldn't mean it anyway."

"Titus understands his role is to provide us the information we need and then he will be returned to the edge of my lands to be banished forever." Lexa met his eye and he nodded in disappointment.

Clarke moved to stand beside her. She knew she needed to appear to be strong and not affected by his arrival, but her heart was racing and she had to admit that she felt safer standing beside Lexa. Titus would rather die than harm her.

"Whatever you need, Wanheda."

"I need you to tell us everything you know about your origin story." Clarke began and motioned for him to sit on the small sofa. He followed her hand and took a seat. Clarke remained standing and Lexa apparently understood her need and stood next to her, but took a step in front of her as well as if to act as a barrier between them. "From the beginning, Titus. Don't leave anything out."

Titus began by telling them much of what they'd already figured out. In fact, Clarke was disappointed because he'd yet to reveal anything to them they didn't already know. Perhaps, having him return had been fruitless and she should have returned to Arkadia to be of use there.

"What of the spirit of the Commanders?" Lexa asked him after he finished.

"What about them, Heda?"

"The thing you put inside her. What is it exactly?" Clarke added.

"It is our most sacred object placed beneath the most sacred symbol. It is the spirit of the Commander. You know this, Heda."

Lexa walked toward him and sat next to him.

"Titus, I do not believe it is."

"Heda?"

"It comes from the sky."

"It's artificial intelligence."

"You don't know what you're talking about." He looked at Clarke.

"Don't look at her." Lexa ordered. "You look at me."

"Sha, Heda." He looked down instead.

"Can it be removed?" She asked.

"Safely?" Clarke mentioned.

"You cannot remove the Commander's spirit, Heda. It is a part of you. They guide you and ensure you make the right decisions for our people."  
"My people. They are no longer your people, Titus. You are no longer their Flamekeeper." She scolded.

"I understand what you believe, Titus." Clarke told him and noticed his eyes remained on Lexa. "What we want to know is if it can be physically removed from Lexa's body safely regardless of what you believe."

"I do not know. The only way it has ever been removed is in the event of the Commander's death. No Flamekeeper has ever removed it from a living Commander. That would mean they were no longer the Commander. It must remain in the Commander's body. It must be passed on to the next Commander. That is our way."

"How do you remove it?" Clarke asked. "When the Commander dies, how do you remove it?" She gulped. Lexa dying was too much for her to think about right now.

"We make a small incision using the fleimkidon and it removes itself. We close it with a command and place it in the case passed down from Flamekeeper to Flamekeeper. It is then placed in the next Commander at the end of the conclave."  
"It removes itself?" Lexa questioned.

"Yes, the spirit is very much alive, Heda. It removes itself and is placed into the case."

Lexa turned to look at Clarke.

"We have what we need." Clarke affirmed and Lexa nodded.

"It is time for you to go, Titus." Lexa stood.

"Heda, may I have a moment alone with Wanheda?"

Clarke looked just as surprised as Lexa.

"No." Lexa replied quickly.

"It's okay." Clarke looked at her and then at Titus. "He won't try anything."

He nodded in the affirmative.

It took everything in Lexa to let Clarke have this. She needed to respect her autonomy, her intelligence and everything else that made her strong, but the thought of her being alone with the man who shot her, almost made her tell both of them no. Instead, she took steps toward Titus and glared at him.

"Jomp em op en yu jomp ai op." Lexa made sure he understood that if he attacked Clarke, he would be attacking his Commander. He nodded. Lexa looked to Clarke who smiled at her. She opened the door. "I'll be right outside." She left the door open slightly and Clarke turned toward Titus who still wouldn't meet her eye.

"It's okay. You can look at me, Titus."

"Wanheda, I wanted to thank you."

Clarke wasn't expecting that.

"Thank me?"

"I realize my actions were foolish. I know you understand why I did what I did."

"I understand why you thought you had to do what you did."

"The weapons of Skaikru are not familiar to us and it is said that those who use them are cursed." He paused. "I now know that is true, but I would wish the worst curse upon myself before I would harm Lexa."

"Killing me would have harmed Lexa. You understand that, right?"  
"She would come to understand that as Commander, she must be alone. She would have been in pain, yes, but it was for her people." He finally looked up at her. "I did not intend to harm her, but if you hadn't jumped in the way, I would have. So, I wish to thank you for saving her life; for not putting upon me an even worse curse of causing my Commander's death."

"I didn't do it for you."

"I know."

Clarke stared at him for a moment.

"Is there anything you haven't told us that we should know?"

"You're changing too much too quickly. I know what you want. I understand Heda's wishes, Clarke, but our people cannot change their ways over night. You must be careful. You must take time. Allow them to take time to process these changes. Blood must have blood has always been our way."  
"And it always would be because it's a cycle. Someone ends up dead and that causes someone else to die and a war."

"But we cannot merely change that in one decision. Even though they respect Lexa, she has earned that respect in battle; by following our laws."  
"And she'll earn their respect in peace."

"Very well." He could see he wasn't getting through to her. "I should be on my way."

Clarke watched him walk out of the room and saw Lexa look in on her for a moment before closing the door and walking him out.

_____

"Heda, you mustn't attempt to remove the spirit. It must remain intact." Titus tried as Lexa walked beside him toward two guards that would flank his ride on horseback away from her lands.

"It is not for you to say what I do anymore, Titus."

"Lexa, you have turned your back on the ways of your people before, but this is too far. You're letting Clarke-"  
"This was not Clarke's idea. It was mine." She seethed. "You speak her name again and you will find yourself with a hole in your stomach."

Titus took his spot between the two warriors, but remained on the ground.

"I only want what's best for you, Heda; for your people. They deserve a Commander that is thinking only of them and not of-"

"Love?" Lexa interrupted.

"Yes." Titus replied.

"I told you, Titus. I reminded you of Costia and the Azgeda. I let Nia, my worst enemy into the alliance because it was best for all of my people. It would mean no war between our clans, but you couldn't accept that as me putting duty before all else. I put my people ahead of my feelings for Clarke at the mountain. I risked her never forgiving me to protect those trapped by the mountain men and I did it because it was the right decision for the Commander."

"What happens when the right decision for Lexa outweighs the Commander within? When the feelings you possess for Clarke are strong enough to drive your decisions? What happens then, Heda? This is what I speak of. This is why I wanted to end the connection between you and Wanheda."

"These are things a Flamekeeper worries about. You are no longer, Titus." She nodded at one of the guards who took Titus by the bicep and nodded toward the horse. "And Titus?"

"Sha, Heda." He climbed atop the horse that would ride him away forever.

"The connection Clarke and I possess cannot be broken; even in death. You were wrong. We were wrong. Love is not weakness." She paused. "Hodnes laik uf." She motioned with her hand for the riders to take him away and with that, the last Flamekeeper left Polis.

_____

"You're leaving?" Lexa asked when she walked into Clarke's room.

"I have to return to Arkadia." Clarke was packing a bag on her bed. "Either something's happened to the radio or something's happened to all my friends. Either way, I need to be there." She paused to look at Lexa who stood with her hands clasped behind her again. Clarke now understood this posture as her reserved, safe stance. It was as if Lexa felt less involved or less vulnerable if she stood this way. "Hey, I'll be back. We talked about this."

"I know." Lexa replied. "Titus is gone." She added, trying to change the subject.

"Good. Can I sneak out now or do I need to wait for dark?" Clarke returned to packing.

"Can you…" Lexa started and faded. Clarke stopped and looked up at her. "Slow down?" She took a hesitant step toward her.

Clarke nodded and stopped her movements. She sat on the side of the bed and motioned for Lexa to sit next to her. Lexa walked slowly as if each step she took brought Clarke closer to leaving. The slower she made them, the longer Clarke would remain. She undid her weapons and placed them on the bed before sitting down and staring toward the balcony. Clarke watched as she had yet to make eye contact with her. She stood and walked to the bathroom while Lexa waited on the edge of the bed for her return. When she did, she carried a bowl filled with water and a rag.

"Since it's just us in here…" She sat back down and faced her. She dipped the rag into the water and held it up for Lexa to see. She moved her hand toward Lexa who finally turned entirely to face her and felt the rag against her cheek as Clarke began to wipe away at her war paint. "Are you okay with everything?" Clarke asked her.

"Everything is a lot." Lexa gulped out.

Clarke paused and met her eyes.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" Lexa was confused.

"For leaving, for you losing your teacher, for you losing the Commanders." She continued wiping at the girl's face to reveal her skin beneath the black.

"None of this is your fault, Clarke. You have no reason to apologize."

"Have you decided what to do about the AI?" Clarke asked and finished what she could with Lexa's paint. She handed her the rag, dipped in water and watched as she finished the job herself. When Lexa finished, she placed the rag inside the bowl and watched as Clarke sat it on the table next to them.

They stared at one another for a few moments. Lexa seemed to require thoughtful silences and it was something Clarke was still getting used too. It wasn't something she'd really noticed with anyone else in her life and she found it comforting somehow. Lexa was intentional with her words and her actions. She took the time to think things through before merely attempting to fill a room with sound. She finally began moving instead of speaking and she stood first. Clarke was sitting on the bed still and Lexa put her hands on her knees and drove them apart gently. Clarke wasn't sure what she was doing, but figured that since they'd be saying goodbye again, Lexa wanted to express herself in a way that involved few words, if any, but Lexa made no move to take off any clothing. Instead she climbed back in the bed and turned her back to Clarke, leaning her back against Clarke's front between her legs. Clarke hadn't been expecting that, but she smiled at the feeling that Lexa was this comfortable with her. She was the only person in the world that got to see this side of her and she wrapped her arms around her waist and placed her forehead against Lexa's shoulder.

"I am trying not to be worried about your leaving." Lexa finally aired just above a whisper.

"I'm trying not to be worried about leaving you here." Clarke admitted.

Lexa turned her head and Clarke lifted hers. Their eyes met.

"Why?"

Clarke smiled momentarily.

"Maybe because one person has already tried to stop what you're working for here. Maybe because your ambassadors recently staged a coup. Because there's a rogue Nightblood out there that might think she should be Commander. Because you just found out that what's inside you isn't the spirit of the Commanders, but is actually a machine from my people." She paused as she watched Lexa's eyes flit away for a moment. She lifted her fingers to her chin and waited until their eyes were reconnected. "And because I love you and I don't want to be away from you." She expressed and connected their foreheads as they both closed their eyes. "We're on the brink of yet another war and one or both of us always seems to be at risk. There's always a chance we-"

"Death is not the end." Lexa interjected with her eyes still closed.

"My people view it differently than your people."

Lexa pulled back and opened her eyes.

"I believed my spirit would pass on to the next Commander. That's why I was so certain that you and your people would be safe, but now… I don't know if death is the end." She looked away and then back at Clarke. "What do you believe?"

Clarke sighed and leaned back against the headboard of the bed; pulling Lexa in tighter to her while they both stared toward the balcony and Polis.

"I don't know if I'm the right person to ask."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't believe in anything anymore."

Lexa dragged her fingers over Clarke's forearm.

"What do your people teach?"

"I guess they teach that there is a God and after you die, you go to heaven."

"What is heaven?" She asked.

"Supposedly, it's a place where you can be reunited with people you've lost. It's happy, I think. I was raised by two Ark scientists so I don't really believe in all that."

"What do you believe in then, Clarke?" Lexa lifted herself up and turned toward Clarke. Clarke's arms went to her side instead of being wrapped around the girl.

"No one's ever asked me that. I guess I just believe when you die, you're gone. I don't know what's beyond that."

"I don't like that." Lexa offered, taking Clarke by surprise.

"You don't have to believe it." Clarke told her.

"The one thing that's made this easier…" She began. "Is believing that if one or both of us is killed in service to our cause, that we…" She faded and looked down at her hand resting on Clarke's thigh.

"Lexa…" Clarke understood what she was saying. She knew Lexa loved her, but she'd never known how deeply until Lexa suggested that they not only share this life together, but the next as well. "We're going to be fine. We'll make it through all this. We will find peace." Clarke began pulling Lexa toward her. "Together." Lexa climbed on top of her and Clarke brought her hand behind her neck to pull her even closer. "We won't end." She felt Lexa's hands on her sides lifting her shirt slowly while their noses grazed. "I've never felt this way." Clarke explained while her lips just barely touched Lexa's. "I never thought I could." Lexa pulled back slightly to look at her. "You and I will always be connected." Clarke shared. Lexa smiled, recalling her earlier comment to Titus about the connection she and Clarke share being unbreakable. Even in death, they'd find their way to each other.

She nodded and captured Clarke's lips. It didn't take long for their tongues to meet and the thought of Clarke having to leave soon, disappeared from their minds as they tore at the clothing covering their skin. Once they were finally bare and pressed against one another, they shared an exchange of I love you and Lexa slid further down Clarke's body. She stopped at her collar bone first to place gentle kisses there before moving to her breasts and the space between them. Clarke's breathing had quickened as her hands tried to hold onto any piece of Lexa's body she could as the girl continued to move her lips and tongue over her body. She gasped when Lexa's mouth wrapped around a nipple while one of her hands drifted to her thigh to rest there. Lexa's lips moved to her stomach and she pressed them to Clarke's new scar, wishing more than anything that she'd been able to prevent it from being apart of Clarke's perfect skin. She dragged her tongue downward, feeling Clarke's body rise slightly before she placed kisses on her hips and grazed her teeth gently over the same spots.

When she finally moved lower and connected her mouth with another part of Clarke, she reveled in the feeling of Clarke's legs spreading further apart. She placed her hand on Clarke's stomach to both hold her down and she sped up her pace and felt Clarke's body start to react and also because they'd done this enough times now for her to know that if she puts her arm there, Clarke's hand will find it and they will link together while Clarke both rises and comes down. She'd been learning Clarke's body with every encounter and she wished for many more opportunities to learn even more. She wanted to discover every spot that gave her a moment of happiness because she wanted more than anything to make the girl beneath her happy; to allow her to rest her burdens even just for a minute. Clarke had given her that with each of their times together and she only hoped she was doing the same for her. When Clarke began to moan louder, Lexa knew she was almost there. She renewed her focus and felt Clarke's hand squeeze hers more tightly.

When she felt Clarke come down and her body begin to relax, she kissed the inside of her thighs repeatedly. She made her way back up her body applying more gentle kisses to her skin.

She connected their lips while Clarke's hand went behind her neck and her other hand rested on her lower back. Lexa leaned back to stare at Clarke while she continued to breathe faster than usual.  
"What will you tell people in Arkadia?"

"About what?" Clarke got out.

"About us." Lexa pressed her lips gently to Clarke's cheek and then lower on her jaw and then her neck.

"I wasn't planning on telling them anything." Clarke professed. She felt Lexa's movements halt. "That doesn't mean I don't want too." She felt Lexa kiss her once more and then straighten out her arms to stare down at her. "If things were different…"

"No one should know. There are rumors, but it should stop there." She leaned back and straddled Clarke allowing Clarke to see all of her. She ran her hands up and down her sides and then pressed one hand to the spot over her heart.

"Some day though." Clarke could feel Lexa's heartbeat beneath her hand.

"Some day we will rule our people side by side."

"Heda and Wanheda." Clarke added.

Lexa took her hand and placed it over Clarke's on her heart.

"No." She replied seriously. "There will be no more need for the Commander of Death, Clarke or a Commander of an army. We will lead as Clarke and Lexa."

Clarke found herself being continually surprised by the woman in front of her and she regretted more than anything that this was the last day they'd have together for the foreseeable future. She quickly grasped Lexa's hips and flipped them over, causing Lexa to erupt in laughter. It was a laughter Clarke had never heard before and it nearly ripped her heart out knowing that Lexa had a rare cause to laugh like that and that she wouldn't be able to hear it again, possibly for a long time.

Clarke pressed her lips to Lexa's chest, feeling the vibrations from her laughter and kissing her throughout until what she was doing to the girl's body caused her to stop laughing entirely and start gasping instead as Clarke's fingers first worked against her and then inside her while she moved above her. When Lexa's back arched, she slowed her efforts and watched her come down before climbing back on top of her and kissing her. She laid on top of her and felt Lexa's arms wrapped around her. They remained like that for a while before Clarke finally spoke.

"I want this to be our goodbye." She kissed her neck. Lexa's arms relaxed around her and her eyes opened.

"We'll never say goodbye, Clarke." Lexa ran her fingers up and down her back.

"I want to remember you like this while I'm in Arkadia." She lifted herself up. "I don't want you to say 'May we meet again' before I hop on a horse. This is us." She kissed her. "This is the real us and I don't want the Commander to have to say an awkward goodbye at the risk of someone seeing you actually display affection for someone." She smirked at her and Lexa smiled back.

"I understand."

"I should get ready." She leaned back. "You should keep the radio. Once I find out what's going on there, I'll find one myself and use it to keep you updated."

"You are so frustrating sometimes." Lexa rolled her eyes at her and tried to move out from underneath her, but Clarke kept her in place. She rolled her eyes at her and smiled. Lexa finally smiled back.

From her straddling position, Clarke dragged her fingers down the center of Lexa's chest.

"You are so beautiful." She managed to whisper.

Lexa wasn't ready for that. She sat up and wrapped Clarke's arms around her neck. She kissed between her breasts and felt Clarke's fingers touch the scar.

"What should I say instead of may we meet again?" She asked and looked up at Clarke who looked down on her and moved her hands to hold her face.

"Just tell me you love me."  
"Ai hod yu in, Klark kom Skaikru. Osir keryon ste tenia feva." I love you, Clark from Sky Crew. Our souls are entwined forever.

Clarke smiled and closed her eyes briefly before opening them again to make sure to memorize this moment before she had to yet again put the wellbeing of her people ahead of what she wanted most.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

Clarke once again found herself alone in the woods. This time, she was running toward her people instead of away from them. She'd gone alone in order to ensure secrecy despite Lexa's protestations that she could send her most trusted warriors with her to act as guard. Clarke was just shot after all and would undoubtedly be weak exerting herself on the journey. Clarke was actually grateful for the solitude though.

She'd grown used to it during her time on the run. There were the occasional meetings with Niylah and other weigh stations that yielded supplies and shelter. Thinking back to Niylah made her hang her head as she rode somewhat slowly due to her still healing injury. She'd been using the girl for some form of comfort and she hated herself for it. That was another thing she and Lexa had yet to talk about. Their past relationships. She knew of Costia and Lexa knew of Finn, but neither of them had gone into specifics about their dead loves and neither ever brought up if there'd been anyone else. Perhaps, their relationship wouldn't require that conversation at all. Clarke smiled at the thought. They were different.

She stopped a few times during her ride. Once to eat, once to give her body a break and once to give the horse one. She had no idea what to expect when she arrived at the barricade. Lexa would do nothing to help her get in without giving up the fact that she'd granted Clarke special treatment and neither of them could have anyone else question their feelings for one another at this time.

She heard the grounders before she saw them. She tied the horse she'd been given to a tree and covered her head in her hood, using the dark color of the cloak to help shield her in the night. She made her way as quietly as possible, attempting to try to find a hole she could slide through, but the further she walked around Arkadia, staying on the perimeter, the more obvious it was that the soldiers Lexa had sent were covering Arkadia well and she may have traveled all this way for nothing. After making her way around the entire camp going unnoticed, she back tracked to her horse and considered her options.

"You know for someone who was on the run for months, you suck at it." It was Octavia's voice.

Clarke turned around.

"Octavia! What are you doing out here?" Clarke mostly whispered.

Octavia approached and handed her the radio.

"Indra helps me get in and out. That's for you." She motioned to the radio. "It was stolen from Indra's tent. I guess a grounder didn't like her having Skaikru tech. She found out who did it and got it back tonight. That's why we haven't been able to reach her, but Kane's been locked up. That's why we can't reach him. They've got him in with Lincoln. I've tried to get to them, but I can't. There's a constant guard rotation and say what you want about farm station, but Pike knows how to command soldiers."

"What about my mom?" Clarke asked.

"She's either in medical or in her room. Pike has her on a tight leash. He doesn't know she escaped to help you though and he's still clueless that I'm even around at all. I've been bouncing in and out, reporting back to Indra when I can and staying inside tunnels and stuff when I need too."

"Bellamy?"

"My brother, the tool? He's still following Pike. Second in command. A real source of pride for the Blake family." She motioned with her head. "Come on. We should get you inside before the sun comes up. Indra's this way. Leave the horse." Octavia walked her toward a bank of trees that provided decent cover and made some type of sounds in succession that Clarke guessed was a signal. They were too near a group of grounders to speak so all they could do was wait. It didn't take long. Maybe two minutes or so before Clarke could make Indra out in the group of soldiers as she walked past them and their lit fire. "Come on." Octavia told her and they jogged toward where Indra was walking. Clarke tried to look off to the side as they moved as quickly as she was able and noticed Indra giving orders and the group of warriors nodded and walked in the opposite direction Clarke and Octavia were heading. They stopped when Octavia held up her hand and she waited until Indra kicked at a rock before Octavia motioned for them to move.

Octavia nodded at Indra as they approached and they linked wrists as is the custom.

"Clarke." Indra greeted. "You must move quickly."

"If we get separated inside and you need to escape, give Indra the signal and she'll get you out." Octavia explained as she pulled back on the large piece of the metal fence to get inside Arkadia.

"You don't have long." Indra told them. "Pike has had Skaikru training within these walls. He's smart enough to know that just attacking the force of the blockade isn't enough. Regardless of how many of us he kills, the Commander will send more."

"They'd run out of bullets before they killed everyone." Octavia added.

"And then they'd be forced to fight like real warriors." Indra specified.

"Let's go, Clarke." Octavia motioned. "We're clear." She nodded at Indra and made her way inside.

"Keep this." Clarke handed Indra the radio. "Lexa has one. Tell her what's going on."

"The Commander would prefer to hear from you."

"I'll find another one inside. We can all talk. Take it." She repeated.

"Clarke!" Octavia was whispering.

Indra nodded and took the radio. Clarke made her way through the metal fence and inside Arkadia.

It was mostly quiet, but as they remained in their space between the fence and the start of the tunnels of the connected Ark ships that made up Arkadia, they heard the heavy footsteps of guards.

"We should stay here. Get some rest. We'll move when the guards change shifts. Should be in about 30 minutes." Octavia told her and they sat in the small space in the dark waiting for their moment. "So, how'd you leave things with Lexa?" Octavia asked, again whispering.

"What do you mean?" Clarke matched her tone.

"Come on, Clarke. If anyone understands what it's like loving a grounder, it's me and you went and fell for the one in charge of the whole thing; the one that left us at the mountain to die."

Clarke glared at her for a moment. She'd grown tired of people constantly referencing Lexa's actions at the mountain as a justification for hating her or her people.

"I didn't realize it at the time because things were happening so quickly and I had to make decisions that would save us… and kill others." She hung her head briefly before lifting it back up and looking at Octavia. "But knowing her how I do now, knowing what she sees in me… Sometimes, I don't even know how or why she sees it, but she does. Knowing that, I understand why she left us there."

"You care to share?"

"She knew I'd be okay. She knew we'd make it."

"She couldn't have known that, Clarke. Come on."

"Octavia, she trusted me. She believed in me. She always has. She knew I'd figure something out." She paused. "She didn't leave us to die. She knew we'd survive."

Octavia didn't say anything. She just leaned her head back against the hard metal.

"What's the plan here? You're in. Now what?" She finally spoke up.

"We take down Pike."

"How exactly? He's protected and it's just you and me."

"We need to find my mom." Clarke nodded at her.

_____

At the guard change, Octavia slipped out first and checked that the coast was clear before motioning for Clarke to follow her. They didn't speak until they were safely navigated through the halls and made their way to Abby's room where they knocked while anxiously looking around to make sure they hadn't been spotted.

"Clarke?" Abby questioned before quickly ushering them both into the room and closing the door behind them. "How are you? Are you okay?" She tried to reach out for Clarke, but Clarke resisted.

"Mom, we don't have time for that right now. I'm fine. Where's Kane?"

"He and Lincoln are in the cage. That's what Pike calls it now. Says it's reserved for the animals and those that sympathize."

"Why did he lock Kane up? He was free before."

"Because Kane wouldn't give in. He knew he was working behind his back. The only reason I'm not locked up too is because I'm one of the only doctors the Ark has and with this kill order and potential war, he needs me to save his soldiers."

"What about Jaha?" Clarke asked.

"That crackpot?" Octavia sat down on the sofa and grabbed a piece of fruit from the bowl on the table in front of it. "Sorry, I'm starving.'  
"Jaha's still trying to get people to join him in the City of Light. Some are resisting, but the numbers are dwindling."

"What do you know about that?" Clarke asked her mother.

"Not much. It doesn't appear to cause any damage based on the tests I've run, but it definitely changes behavior. Raven's been completely di-"

"Raven took it?" Clarke seemed surprised. She sat next to Octavia; her body needing a break from the work it took to get it here.

"Her leg, Clarke. It was the only way she could stop the pain."

"It's an AI, mom."

"AI?" Abby looked at Octavia and she just shrugged.

Clarke started explaining the whole story from the beginning. Both of them listened intently.

"So, what does this thing want? Why is it making the former Chancellor pass it around like candy?"

"It's not the last." Clarke mumbled to herself realizing something.

"What, honey?" Abby asked, sitting down next to her.

"Lexa said something. It's the first, but it's not the last." Clarke started to fill them in on the fact that Lexa has her own AI attached to her brain. "I think it wants to destroy itself."

"That doesn't make any sense. Why go to all this trouble-"

"Not itself exactly." Clarke interrupted Octavia. "Alie wants to destroy the other version."  
"The upgrade." Abby added.

"It makes sense. Alie ended the world or at least she thought she did. They made a better version of her and it was brought back down here. Now, Alie wants to destroy it and take over again. Maybe even try to end the world for good this time."  
"Why is Jaha helping her?" Octavia asked.

"I don't think he realizes what he's doing." Abby answered her.

"I don't think any of them do. She tells them she can take away pain. She can make things better and they have no choice to believe her."

"Well, that's the least of our worries right now." Octavia took another bite.

"She's right, Clarke. We can't think about that right now. We need to stop Pike."

"And Bellamy." Octavia added.

"And anyone we have to in order to stop this war. The grounders are growing restless. We can hear them at night. They're just waiting for their orders to attack. They're not people accustomed to waiting long."

"We need more fighters. No offense, Clarke, but you're no soldier." Octavia didn't exactly compliment.

"I'm due in medical in 10 minutes. I'm afraid I can't be of much help now. It's better if I stay on Pike's good side for now."

"Until we put him down at least." Octavia stood.

"Kill him?" Clarke checked.

"Yeah, what did you think we were going to do with him?"

"Lock him up. With him behind bars, we can convince everyone that Kane should be Chancellor."

"You've been gone a long time, Clarke." Octavia walked toward the door of Abby's room. "Pike's gotta go. That's the only way."  
"We can't just kill him, Octavia. It goes against everything Lexa and I-" She stopped herself.

"No, keep going." Octavia encouraged sarcastically. "You and Lexa living it up in Polis think you have this all figured out. You can just change the way of things over night. Pike has to die. He deserves to die. He killed hundreds of grounders for no reason other than he wanted revenge. He sees them as animals, Clarke. There's no turning back from that."

"Clarke, she's right." Abby agreed. "Pike is dangerous."

"Look, this is a discussion for later. Right now, we should focus on getting Lincoln, Kane and the others out and putting Pike in."

"What about my brother?" Octavia asked her.

"We'll put him with Pike until you can talk some sense into him." Clarke offered and Octavia nodded.

"Where's Murphy?" Clarke asked.

"I haven't seen him." Abby replied.

"He's been staying outside Arkadia. He's afraid to come in here if you ask me. Doesn't want to see Jaha, I guess. I've helped him find a place to hide out until this if all over. It's out of site. Grounders don't know he's there." Octavia supplied.

"Stay here. I'll head to medical. Jasper and Monty still haven't taken the chip. I'll send them here to help."

"Jasper isn't exactly someone I want help from right now." Octavia announced.

"I don't think I'm his favorite person, mom."

"Well, it's time to put aside petty crap from the past, isn't it?" Abby replied, frustrated. "He'll understand how important this is." She motioned toward the back of her room to the metal wall. "There's a way out through there. Kane had it put in when I was Chancellor. It's an escape path no one else knows about. You can use it to get around." She walked to a cabinet and pulled something out. She turned to Clarke and handed her a radio. "It needs to be charged, but if you can make it to engineering, you can find a remote charger. I'll send Jasper and Monty to you there. Pike is holding an assembly in an hour to talk about the attack he's planning to launch on the blockade. Everyone will be busy."

"We'll make our move then." Clarke agreed.

"When the assembly is over, Pike will return to his room. He'll have guards stationed outside and Bellamy may be with him, but that's the best time to strike." Abby instructed.

"Your mom's turned into a pretty good battle leader, Clarke."

"The escape path runs past his room. You should be able to get in, but you'll need to make a door yourself."

"Got it." Clarke was surprised by her mother's plan, but was happy she didn't have to supply one for once.

"I'll be in medical, but I'll check in here when I can until we can meet up again. Get him and anyone with him behind bars, Clarke. Then, we can tell the army outside we've taken Arkadia and Lexa can tell them to go."

"Let's go." Octavia walked back toward the wall Abby had referenced and she slowly pulled a small section away from the rest of it and climbed in.

"Clarke…" Abby took Clarke's hand.

"I'll be okay, mom. We'll get through this." She told her and pulled away. "Just in time for the next problem." She turned and climbed through the wall before Octavia put it back in place and the only sign they were even there was the piece of fruit half-eaten resting on Abby's table.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10:

"Engineering is this way, Clarke." Octavia walked ahead of her. "We moved it after you left."

Clarke had been heading the wrong direction and turned around to follow Octavia.

"I guess a lot has changed."

"Yeah well, maybe you shouldn't have left."

"Octavia, daun ste pleni!" Clarke spoke in a loud whisper, recognizing her surroundings.

"Talking like a grounder now, huh?"  
"What is your problem with me?" Clarke lightly shoved at her shoulder.

"You left us, Clarke." Octavia finally let it out. "You ran away after Lexa ditched us at Mount Weather. You don't know what it was like. Everyone pretended like things were good. Normal. But there were zones. We could only go certain places or we'd risk death. Lincoln almost became a guard in Skaikru, Clarke." She pressed her back against the wall. "The same guards that I used to have to crawl under my floor to hide from or I'd be floated." She took a deep breath. "I wasn't Trikru anymore, but I wasn't Skaikru either."

"And you blame me for that?" Clarke replied calmly.

"I don't blame you for that. I blame you for leaving in the first place. You were our leader, Clarke. Sure, there's Kane and Abby and others will come and go, I'm sure, but you were our leader. The 100. The ones that came down from the sky before everyone else. You kept us safe. You put us before everyone else and then suddenly, you were gone. We've all been floundering since."

"And then you see me with Lexa…"

"And it's like you traded up or something. Look, I get what you said about her and the mountain. She trusted you. Knew you'd find a way to save everyone and I'm Trikru again so she's my Commander and I'll fall in line, but you were there rolling around on furs, making out by candlelight probably and we were here trying to keep everything together."

Clarke waited a moment before she responded while she watched Octavia look anywhere but her eye.

"I'm here now, Octavia." She paused. "I'm here now."

"Well, I think we've had enough girl talk. I'm ready to overthrow a Chancellor. You in?"

Clarke nodded and they walked toward engineering. A few minutes later, Octavia was sliding open a hatch. The room was empty since it was still early. They walked in and Clarke quickly located a remote charger for the radio. She plugged it in and within a few seconds, it was working again. She turned it off just to make sure no one could get through while they were trying to be stealthy. When the door to engineering opened, they ducked behind a counter.

"Clarke?" It was Monty's voice.

Clarke and Octavia stood.

"Monty." She greeted him with a hug. "Where's Jasper?"

"Here." Jasper walked into the room slowly. He looked pale and when he met her eye, he didn't exactly look happy to see her again. "Let's get this over with."

"What do you need?" Monty asked them.

"We need to get into Pike's room after the assembly. We've got a path, but we'll need a door." Clarke explained.

"That's easy." Monty nodded.

"Get what you need and let's get out of here. The morning shift's going to start soon."

"No one's reporting to work this morning." Jasper explained and sat nonchalantly on a counter. "Pike's got his war assembly. The only people actually showing up to work are in medical and guards. Everyone else is expected to be there. Attendance is mandatory." He sang that last line in a mocking sing-song tone.

Clarke rushed over to him.

"Hey, are you with us or not because I need every person we've got and if you don't want to be here, then don't be here." She chastised.

"I should have taken the damn chip." He climbed off the counter and stood in front of her.

"But you didn't." Monty mentioned.

Jasper looked at him and then back at Clarke.

"I'm here." He paused. "But I'm not here for you. Pike wants another war and I am tired of war."

"Fine."

"Monty, get what you need. Let's get moving."

After Monty had gathered up supplies and Clarke grabbed a few more remote charges and an extra radio, they headed back into the tunnel. They went silent the closer they got to Pike's room. They could hear talking through the wall, but couldn't make anything out. When they heard his door open and close a few seconds later, they waited for another minute just to make sure it was empty before Monty went to work. He used a blow torch to weaken hinges that had been welded together hastily to make the space and once they heard loud voices, they knew the assembly had begun. They timed hammer hits with eruptions of applause. It made Clarke sick to her stomach to think of her people cheering war, but she had to remain focused while Jasper and Monty worked together to remove the piece of the wall. It took longer than they expected so when they walked inside Pike's room to check it out, they didn't have much time to work up an actual plan. Luckily, Pike was careful and he'd placed a gun under the pillow on his bed. Octavia picked it up first and then passed it to Clarke.

"I can't use this." She said as she handed it over. Clarke knew she was Trikru and couldn't use Skaikru weapons anymore so she took it.

"We don't know who's going to come back with him. You two should stay in the tunnel. If they take us, they won't find you and you can tell my mom what happened." She motioned to Jasper and Monty. "Take this." She handed them the extra radio. "If we get locked up, tell my mom Indra and Lexa both have one of these."

"Lexa has one of our radios?" Jasper was surprised.

"She's on our side, Jasper."

"She left us-"  
"We don't have time for this!" Octavia reminded. "Jasper, it's true. Lexa is on our side. She doesn't want this war anymore than we do. She's keeping the army at bay right now so we can take care of Pike. Now, shut the hell up and get in the damn tunnel so we can end this."

"I found another one." Monty professed as he located a small pistol on his way back to the tunnel.

"Keep it." Clarke told him.

They climbed into the tunnel and replaced the metal as if had never been moved in the first place.

"I'll go in there." Octavia motioned toward the closet. "I'm used to small spaces." She joked and climbed inside. She left the door open. "You should be there." She pointed behind the door to the room. "Take them by surprise. I'll come out and take the weapons from them."

Clarke nodded while Octavia closed the door and then Clarke and took her place behind the door, holding the gun in both hands. They heard footsteps in the hallway along with the chatter of people just beginning their days. She couldn't help but think about how tired she was. She hadn't slept in 24-hours. She shook her head quickly and regained her focus. The footsteps kept going past the room until she heard some stop in front of the heavy door. She heard Pike's voice and put her finger on the trigger. The door swung open and she watched him walk inside the small space. She moved out from behind the door and aimed the gun at his head. She was only a foot away, but she misjudged and realized too late that he wasn't alone.

Bellamy saw the gun and lifted her arms in the air, causing the gun to go off. Octavia jumped out of the closet, sword in hand and before she was even close enough to do any damage, Pike was reaching for his gun and Bellamy freed one of his hands from Clarke's and was reaching for his own.

"Bellamy, no!" Octavia yelled at her brother while Clarke tried to regain power of her gun.

Pike aimed at Octavia, who stopped in her tracks and then there was a sound of metal scratching followed by another gun shot. Then, a second.

Clarke watched as Pike fell to the ground and lost his gun, which was kicked away by Octavia and she felt control over her own gun return to her as she looked at Bellamy who had been shot in the shoulder. She aimed her gun back in his direction and looked quickly to her right where Jasper was standing, holding the pistol Monty had found. He and Monty had heard the shot and made their way into the room.

"Sorry, I guess I've got rage I still need to deal with." He finally broke the silence.

"We weren't supposed to shoot anyone! The guards will be on their way. We've got to go." Octavia stated the obvious.

"Monty, Jasper, take Bellamy and Pike into the tunnel."

"Clarke, you're making a mistake." Pike finally spoke up. The bullet had punctured his left leg. Monty was lifting him up while Octavia checked him for more weapons.

"No, you made a mistake." Clarke told him.

"Clarke, we're making things right." Bellamy added while Clarke pointed the gun at him and he held his shoulder and she walked him in the direction of the hole in the wall.

"I'm making things right, Bell." She explained. "I told you. You're on the wrong side of this."

"Let's go, brother." Octavia shoved him in the hole with Monty and Jasper. "You two okay in there?"

"We're fine." Jasper announced.

"What about their wounds?" Monty asked.

"They can wait." Octavia looked at Bellamy. She climbed through the hole and Clarke followed. The lifted the metal piece just before they heard guards trample into the room looking for Pike and the cause of the noise.

Jasper put his hand over Pike's mouth to prevent him from yelling out and they forced him to hop along while Clarke tore at pieces of fabric and passed them to Monty. He used them to wrap them around Pike and Bellamy's mouths and after they all walked several more feet, Jasper sat Pike down on the ground and used Monty's wire from engineering to tie his hands. Monty did the same to Bellamy and Clarke and Octavia looked on for a moment before seeing that everything was fine and taking off to find the cage.

They arrived to the spot in the wall Octavia had broken through before and waited while they heard guards talking about how Pike was missing. They could hear them saying something about Miller and Octavia nodded. They waited until it appeared it was the best time to try and climbed out of the tunnel.

"Octavia?" Miller questioned and ran over to her.

"Are you alone?" She asked him.

"Yeah, they're looking for Pike. He's missing."

"Good." She nodded back and Clarke appeared.

"Clarke?" Miller greeted and helped her out of the tunnel.

"Hey, Miller."

"Octavia!" Lincoln yelled when he saw her. "You can't be there."

"We're getting you guys out."

"Clarke?" Kane spotted her. "Is it happening?" He asked, apparently knowing what they were there for.

"We've got Pike. Let's get you guys out of here."

Miller unlocked the door and a few others that Pike had labeled sympathizers walked out with them and into the tunnel.

"Where's your mother?" Kane asked.

"She's in medical." Clarke replied. "How hard is it going to be to persuade everyone that you're the real Chancellor?" She asked him.

"He's gotten a lot of support, Clarke. It might not be easy." Kane shared.

"How did he even get elected?" She asked as the group continue through the tight tunnel.

"The people were out for blood. He was prepared to give it to them."

They approached Monty and Jasper who were standing in front of Pike and Bellamy. Bellamy's wound appeared to be mostly superficial while Pike's appeared to be serious.

"They need a doctor, Clarke." Kane stated and knelt by Pike to help him put pressure on the wound he couldn't himself since he was bound and it appeared Monty and Jasper were not helping.

"Let him die." Octavia offered.

"We can't exactly take him to medical." Monty said.

"No, but we can bring medical to him." Clarke stated. "Lincoln, go through the tunnel to Abby's room. She should be returning soon to check in. Tell her what's happened and bring her here."

"I'll go with him." Octavia announced and Clarke didn't have the energy to argue with her.

Pike seemed to be seething beneath the surface, but wasn't attempting to make a sound.

"We didn't have to do this, Pike." Kane pushed. "We could have had peace with them."

Pike turned his head away.

Clarke knelt down in front of Bellamy.

"Why did you choose this?" She asked, but he was unable to reply. She moved to take off the gag and kept her hand on it in case he yelled and she had to replace it.

"I'm tired of trying, Clarke. We've lost so many. I just wanted it to be done." He answered her.

"You'd wipe out an entire population so it could be done?" She couldn't believe what she was hearing, but he didn't respond. He looked at the ceiling and she replaced the gag.

"What happened?" Abby asked as she rushed toward the group minutes later.

"Pike and Bellamy were shot. I think Bellamy's fine, but Pike was hit bad." Clarke answered.

Abby knelt down next to Pike with her medical bag and looked at his wound once Kane lifted his hands.

She rummaged through her bag and pulled out medicine and a syringe.

"Kane, get the bandages." She ordered and Kane unpacked a large bandage and pressed it to Pike's leg while the rest of the group looked on including Lincoln and Octavia who had followed Abby back. Abby filled the syringe and looked up at her daughter. She looked at Kane and then back to Clarke. "It didn't have to be this way." Abby said when she looked at Pike and injected the medication into his arm. "You had a chance, Pike."

"Mom?" Clarke knew. In that moment, she knew. "Mom?" She repeated.

Abby let go of the syringe and it clanged against the metal ground.

"It's done." Abby's voice was shaky.  
"What's done?" Kane asked. He looked down at Pike and watched as his eyes closed.

"What's going on?" Monty asked.

"He's gone." Abby announced and stood.

"Mom, you didn't?" Clarke asked her.

"It had to be done, Clarke and you've made enough life and death decisions for us. It was time for someone else." She knelt back down and removed the pin from Pike's jacket. She handed it to Kane who was still in shock. "Congratulations, Chancellor."

Kane stayed kneeling for a moment while it was silent. He finally stood and pressed the pin to his jacket.

"Take Pike back to his room. The guards will be looking for him elsewhere so you should be safe. Leave him there. Abby go back to medical and walk past Pike's room on the way. You discovered the body and tried to save him. People saw you in medical when he disappeared so no one will suspect you. Lincoln, you and I are going back to the cage with the others. Miller, lock us back up. When the word about Pike's death gets out, Abby will come and let me out. I was second in the election and am now the duly appointed Chancellor."

"What about Bellamy?" Octavia asked.

"We can't trust you, son." He said to Bellamy. "Keep him here for now. Once we have control, we'll get his wound checked out and lock him up until we can figure out what to do with him."  
"What about Pike's killer?" Clarke asked, looking at her mother.

"We'll have an investigation, but it will be fruitless." Kane looked at the guns Clarke and Jasper were holding. "Who shot him?"

"I did." Jasper confessed.

"Lose the guns. They can't ever be found." Kane stated. "Clarke and Octavia, stay out of sight. If you can, radio or get to Indra and let her know it's done so she can tell Lexa."

"We'll take care of it." Clarke said. "Chancellor." She nodded at him.

"Let's get it done." Kane started walking back in the direction of the cage with Lincoln, Miller and the others in tow. Abby walked as Monty and Jasper struggled to carry the lifeless Pike back to his room.

Octavia and Clarke were left with Bellamy.

"Why don't you radio in? I'll stay with my brother." Octavia offered.

Clarke looked at both of them before walking in the direction of Pike's room, but stopping around a corner. She couldn't see them carrying him so they were most likely already in the room. She found a small hatch and climbed inside. She didn't want to risk Bellamy hearing the conversation and she also wanted privacy.

She flipped on the radio.

"Indra, Lexa?" Static. "Lexa, Indra?" Static. She knew it wasn't likely that Indra had the radio turned on or if it was it wasn't very loud. She wouldn't want it to be discovered.

"Clarke?" Came a small voice. Clarke let out a breath she'd been holding since leaving Polis.

"It's me." She told Lexa.

"Are you…"

"I'm fine." She told her. "Pike's dead. Things are in motion. Kane will be in charge of Arkadia by tonight. It will take longer for everything to calm down and we still have Jaha and Alie to worry about, but it's a start."

"I never doubted you."

"I have to get back. I'll send Octavia to let Indra know. I'll have her turn on the radio. You can talk to her."

"I'll have the kill order removed, but keep the barricade for now."

"That's good. Give Kane time to settle them down before you pull the army back."

"What will you do now?" Lexa asked.

"Relieve Octavia. She's watching over Bellamy."  
"I mean after, Clarke."

"I don't know. I have to see how things unfold here. I should go." She said reluctantly into the radio.

"I understand."

"Lexa?"

"Yes?"

"Never mind." She shook her hand. An open radio channel that could have prying ears on it was not the place to say what she wanted to say. "I'll check in later."

She turned the radio off and went back to Octavia. Octavia jumped at the chance to get out of Arkadia and back to Indra and left Clarke with Bellamy.

"Can I take your gag off?" She asked him. He nodded. She sat in front of him and leaned forward to pull it down. "How's your shoulder?"  
"Fine." He replied.

"Please tell me that you'll cooperate, Bellamy."

"I just watched our Chancellor get killed, Clarke."

"Bell, this is serious. No one can know. I know there's a part of you that's angry, but there's a part of you that has to understand that this is necessary. The peace with the grounders is the best option."

"What does it matter what I think now?"

"You can still be a part of this, Bellamy."

"They killed Gina, Clarke. They killed everyone in that mountain."

"That wasn't Lexa."

He laughed.

"Lexa? I can't believe you're still siding with her after what happened."

"She wants peace, Bellamy."

"She wants you, Clarke."

She shook her head.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"You know; I came after you. I risked my life to find you and bring you back here to be with your people."

"I didn't ask you to do that."  
"You didn't have too. We had each other's backs. It was always us versus them."

"It's not anymore. Why can't you get that?"  
"Because no matter how much you say she wants peace, I know not all of them do. Just like not all of us do."

"So, you'd rather go to war?"

"A war we can win, Clarke. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Pike gave us that chance. He was the leader we needed to finally put all this behind us. To take the land we need to build our cities, plant our crops. To give us final peace instead of whatever Lexa is offering." He paused and took a deep breath. "Aren't you tired, Clarke? Don't you just want this to be over?"

Clarke stared at him.  
"Yes, I do." She took a deep breath as well. "But I'll never want it in the way you're suggesting; wiping out everyone that was here before us."

"You and Octavia seem to have it all figured out. Why even bother with me?"  
"Because you're her brother, Bellamy and you and I used to be friends once."  
"Before you left us for Lexa."

"I didn't leave you for Lexa. I left. Lexa rescued me from the Ice Nation who wanted to kill me." She stopped herself. "You know what I want?"

"Peace?" He rolled his eyes.

"More than anything, you know what I want, Bell?" She ignored his comment. "I want one people instead of our people and their people. I want peace, but more than anything, I want people to be taken care of so I can finally just be Clarke Griffin. I was Clarke Griffin on the Ark once." She looked down at the ground. "I want someone else to be in charge, to make decisions."  
"Lexa?"

"No." She replied and he was surprised. "Honestly, it's selfish. I know it is, but no. I want her to be Lexa and me to be Clarke and for the two of us to just-" She stopped herself. "It doesn't matter."

Bellamy looked at her and tipped his head slightly.

"You love her."

Clarke met his eye.

"Yes."

"That's what you want, Clarke? A life with her?"

"I want a life with no more war and yes, I want that life to be with her, Bellamy."

"You could forgive her for what she made us do at the mountain?"

"I already have."

He seemed to stare at her to try to delve into her mind.

"I don't think I could… if I were you."

She didn't respond to that.

"I'm sorry about Gina."

He hung his head.  
"Maybe I made a mistake after the mountain."

"What do you mean?"

"You left and you seem fine now. I stayed and got swept up in all this and I am not fine."

"You will be, Bellamy."

He looked down the hall.

"You should tell them I did it."

"Did what?" She asked.

He turned back to her.

"Tell them I killed Pike."

"What?"

"It'll work. They'll want someone to pay for it. Give them me. He and I had a fight. I pulled a gun, shot him. He got off one round and hit me."  
"You'll be put away, Bell."

"I'm going to be locked up anyway, right?" He motioned to his bound hands. "I'll confess, Clarke. I'll play along."

"Why?"

"Do you still see the faces of the people at the mountain after it happened?"

"Yes."

"So do I." He remarked. "And now I see all the grounders I killed alongside Pike. Their faces haunt me. As much as I want all this to end and as much as I supported Pike, it didn't matter. They still haunt me. Someone should pay for what happened. It might as well be me."

Octavia ran up.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"We're just talking." Bellamy replied.

"Well, don't." Octavia knelt down and covered her brother's mouth with the gag. "No one wants to hear whatever hate you're spouting, brother."

"What did Indra say?"

"She's talking to the other generals right now. She got the order from Lexa on the radio while I was out there. The kill order has been called off. They're just staying in place until we take Arkadia all the way."

"Good."

"By the way, I caught the show while I was making my way back in. Abby discovered Pike's body. They even took him to medical to try to save him."

Clarke looked at Bellamy.

"You ran into the tunnels once you realized your mistake." She told him. He nodded. "Let's go then." She stood.

"What are you two talking about?" Octavia asked as Clarke helped Bellamy stand.

"I'll tell you on the way. We're going to Miller." She looked at Bellamy. "He found you and he'll turn you into Kane." He nodded again. She pulled off his gag.

"Hey, what are you doing?"  
"It's okay, little sister." Bellamy told her.

They walked and Clarke and Bellamy filled Octavia in on the plan. Clarke could tell she was both happy because it would solve several problems for them, but sad at the thought of her brother being locked up. At least this way though, she could respect him a little.

They arrived at the cage tunnel entrance and saw that Kane was no longer inside. Miller rushed to help them out and Clarke explained the plan to him.

"Bellamy, if you do anything to screw this up, I swear-" Octavia started.

"I won't." He replied hastily. "Take these off and get real cuffs on me, Miller." He held out his hands. "I'll confess that it was an accident after a fight like we talked about. Maybe I'll get lucky and Kane won't float me." He joked.

Octavia watched as Miller put real handcuffs on her brother. He ushered him inside the cage with Lincoln and the others.

"Are you okay in here?" Octavia asked Lincoln.

"I'm fine. Kane will pardon us soon. He's got to be named Chancellor officially first. You should go. It's not safe for you two here yet."  
"We'll go back to my mom's room. Tell Kane we're there."

Octavia kissed Lincoln through the bars and Clarke nodded to Bellamy who was sitting on a bench already. He nodded back.

They disappeared into the tunnel and headed back to Abby's room to wait for news.

"So, what are you going to do after all this?" Octavia asked her.

"You mean after Kane takes over? That's only part of our problem."  
"The whole AI thing?"

"If Alie wants to destroy the other version, she'll go after Lexa."

"Because it's in Lexa's head?"

"Yes."  
"Well, take it out."

"It's not that easy, Octavia."

"What? She doesn't want to?"

"No, she does." Clarke replied. "We just don't know if it can. It's never been taken out of a live Commander before. It could be dangerous."

"Pretty sure an army of Aliefied Arkers headed toward your girlfriend hell bent on destroying what's locked inside her head is dangerous too."

"But if removing it could kill her, I can't take that chance."

"Ask your mom what she thinks."

"My mom?"

"She's the best doctor in town, right? Maybe they've never removed the thing out of a living Commander and maybe with their knowledge it is risky, but maybe with our tech it's not or at least not as much."

Abby walked into her room two hours later. Pike was dead. Kane was named acting Chancellor and there would be an official vote later to confirm him or bring in someone else, but Abby was confident Kane would maintain control. Bellamy did confess to the killing and would remain behind bars. Lincoln and the others were being pardoned and Octavia and Clarke were free to roam about Arkadia.

_____

They left Abby's room and were met with some glares, but were left alone. Octavia met Lincoln outside and approached Indra. Clarke watched them talk for a few moments while she stood with her mom and enjoyed just being outside again. She could see the army still gathered, but the tension appeared to have lessened at least.

"You headed back to Polis?" Abby asked her daughter after a few moments of looking around.  
"I can't yet. I need to find out what's going on with Alie and see if we can get her out of my friends and-"  
"And you should return to Polis." Abby finished for her. Clarke looked sideways at her mother. "Not forever. Just as our ambassador, of course." She smiled at Clarke. "Kane's asking that we rejoin the coalition. We need our ambassador there if that's the case."

"Lexa has an AI in her head, mom."

"I know."

"Alie could-"  
"Want to destroy it. I'll wrap up what I need to here and I'll ask Kane to go to Polis to examine her myself."

"You don't have to-"

"She wants it out, doesn't she?" Abby checked.

"Yes."

"It's a lot easier to get me there now that it would be to get her here. The Commander doesn't travel light." Abby turned toward Clarke entirely. "Now that the kill order's been lifted, we can take a car. I'll bring what I need to do the surgery if it's called for."

"Thank you." Clarke told her.

"You should go now though. It's still day light. You can get there by nightfall. Take a car back if you want. I can have someone drive you."

"Why are you so okay with me leaving all the sudden?"

"I meant what I said in there, Clarke. Regardless of what Bellamy says, we know what really happened. I did what had to be done. It shouldn't always fall on your shoulders like it always seems too." She paused. "Lexa cares about you. I can see that." She paused. "I still don't totally understand it, but I can see it at least. You care about her too." She watched as Clarke nodded in agreement. "You'll take care of each other while we sort this stuff out."

"Thank you."

"Get one thing straight though." Abby started. "When we do get this all sorted out, I plan to have a long conversation with the Commander about her intentions with my daughter."  
"Mom!" Clarke exclaimed and they both smiled. She recognized that this moment was one of the rare mother/daughter moments of normalcy they'd been lucky enough to share since before her father died.

"I'll radio when I can and let you know when I'm on the way."

She reached out and hugged her daughter.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

The drive back to Polis was much shorter than the solo ride had been. Abby had gotten Monty to drive the car since he was someone they could both trust. He got as close as he could, but Clarke had to walk the rest of the way once they'd gotten to the outskirts of the city.

She'd told Indra she was leaving and Octavia had chosen to remain behind with Lincoln, but she'd guessed Indra hadn't reported her return to Lexa since things were so chaotic and their reunion was the last of her concerns.

Clarke walked into the building and made her way toward Lexa's room first. The two guards in front of it knew her well and Lexa had basically given her a free pass to the building during her previous stay. Clarke opened the doors, but after a quick call of her name and a look around, she could see Lexa wasn't there. Night had fallen and the candles had been lit, but Lexa wasn't there.

"Heda?" She asked one of the guards when she left the room. He pointed down the hall and Clarke saw two more guards and knew where she was. She smiled shyly and walked toward her old room. The guards there opened the door for her and she was greeted by the flickering light again and a sleeping Commander in her old bed. Seeing her made her breathe deeply and smile, but it also made her realize how completely exhausted she was.

She made her way toward the bed and stripped off her shoes, pants and jacket, leaving herself in her t-shirt and underwear. She did so quietly as she watched Lexa lying there, sleeping peacefully on her side facing where Clarke would have been sleeping. When Clarke started to slide into the bed, the Commander in Lexa was alerted and her tired eyes shot open. It took her only a moment to recognize the intruder and watch as Clarke climbed into bed.

"Am I dreaming?" She asked.

"No." Clarke replied and wrapped her arm around the girl's waist pulling her toward her.

"You're back?"

"I told you I would be."

Lexa's arm wrapped around Clarke and she breathed her in.

"Tell me what happened."

"Shhh…" Clarke rubbed her back. "Tomorrow."

"But you're okay?" Lexa checked.

"I'm okay." Lexa's hand found itself under Clarke's shirt.

They both fell asleep wrapped up like that to the soft flickering light of a few lit candles and the breeze from the balcony overlooking Polis. They would worry about everything else in the morning.

_____

Lexa woke to Clarke staring at her and she smiled and quickly rolled her face into her pillow. Clarke laughed at her.

"Are you shy this morning?"

With Lexa on her stomach, Clarke rubbed her back under her shirt and continued to smile at her.

"I thought I'd dreamt you coming back." She admitted mostly to the pillow.

"Well, you didn't. I'm here." She leaned over and after lifting Lexa's shirt, placed a kiss to her back. "We have a lot to talk about, I guess."

"We'll reconvene the ambassadors tomorrow. I'll introduce Skaikru as the newest member of the coalition."

"Again." Clarke added and Lexa rolled to face her. She placed her hand on Clarke's waist.

"Yes. We'll complete the ceremony so that it is binding when Kane can make it to Polis." She paused and looked at Clarke. "I assume you'll be staying on as their ambassador?" She asked, hopefully.

"For now."

"For now?" Lexa looked nervous.

"I was the ambassador because there was no one else. It made sense for me to be here since you and I…" She hesitated. "Work well together." She finished with a small smile. "But that position should be an elected one like Chancellor. Eventually, Skaikru should choose their ambassador."

"And what makes you think they won't choose you?"

"I don't plan on being an option." Clarke replied and ran her hand up and down Lexa's leg.

"You'd leave?" Lexa pulled her own hand back.

"No." Clarke answered quickly. "I'd stay." She lifted her eyebrows.

There was one of those intentional silences they'd gotten used to sharing.

"You'd stay?"

"Let's just get our people through the next battle and then we can talk about that more." Clarke didn't want to appear too hopeful at the thought of just being here and not having to bear the burden of the responsibility of her people. It was too far in the future. They had another enemy to conquer. "My mom will be here soon. She's going to examine you to see if she can take it out. If that's what you still want…"

Lexa nodded.

"When will she arrive?"

"I don't know. A few days maybe. She has to help finish getting Kane installed as Chancellor and I think she'll stay on as Vice Chancellor at least for now."

"How were you able to do it so quickly? Overthrow Pike?"

"I didn't." Clarke shocked her. "It was strange actually. My mom came up with the plan at first. Then, Kane figured out how to deal with the aftermath." Clarke rolled onto her back. "I was just there." Clarke pointed out. Lexa moved closer to her, but remained on her side holding her head up with her elbow and taking her free hand to Clarke's shirt to lift it slightly. "It's fine, Lexa. It's healed." She looked over at her and Lexa smiled. She'd been caught.

"Your medicine is remarkable." She ran her hand over Clarke's stomach. "Do you think your mother will be able to remove it safely?"

"I'm sure she can." Clarke comforted and placed her hand over Lexa's on her stomach.

Lexa stared down at her.

"Did it bother you that they were able to complete their task without you?" She asked and leaned over to kiss Clarke's shoulder.

Clarke thought about the question for several moments while Lexa looked at her.

"No." She shook her head and then looked over at her. "It didn't." She paused. "They've been taking care of themselves for a while without me. Pike was a mistake. I think most people there know that and things will calm down now that he's gone and Bellamy took the blame."

"What?" Lexa questioned.

"It's a long story. Can we finish it later?" Clarke rolled on her side facing away from Lexa. "I just need another hour or two. Do you need to go or can you stay?"

"I can stay."

Lexa scooted closer to her and wrapped her arm around the girl, placing her head in the crook of her neck. She felt Clarke fall asleep again quickly though she remained awake. This could be her life, she thought. Clarke in her arms. Peace for her people. The only thing she worried about was whether or not she could still lead her people if she had the most sacred object of her people removed.

_____

"Ambassadors, the issues at Arkadia have been resolved. Marcus Kane, our friend and ally has been reinstated as Chancellor of Skaikru. As you know, the kill order was lifted, but the blockade remains in place for our protection while Skaikru continue to build their leadership. Klark kom Skaikru has returned to us as their ambassador." Lexa, standing in front of the room of sitting ambassadors, nodded toward Clarke. "Skaikru was instated as a member of the coalition and the ritual was completed prior to this dispute. Therefore, Skaikru is welcomed back into my coalition. We will hold a celebration soon, but for now, we will continue to attend to the business of peace among our people." She finished and sat in her chair.

"Heda, Skaikru is still in turmoil. Are we to let them back into the coalition so soon?" An ambassador asked.

"Kane was their leader before. He is not new to the task. Skaikru is in good hands." Lexa looked over to Clarke who was still standing in her usual spot. "Now, to the task at hand. I believe it is time that Skaikru had their rightful seat amongst you." Lexa motioned to a guard at the door who then opened it. Two guards walked in carrying a chair like that of the other ambassadors. It was walked past all of them and placed at the end on Lexa's right hand side. "Clarke?" She motioned for Clarke to sit.

Clarke started to walk toward the chair, but stopped in her tracks.

"Heda! This is unacceptable." Another ambassador spoke up and stood at the same time. "That seat is reserved for-"

"My second. Yes." Lexa finished for him. "Hod you rein daun." She instructed.

"Indra?" Clarke asked Lexa quietly.

"She doesn't even know our ways and you're giving her the position." He added.

"Shof op!" She ordered. "Clarke knows many of our ways. She knows not to interrupt the Commander when an order is being given." She glared at him and he sat down. "Clarke, Indra is my second in battle. The chair at the right hand of the Commander is reserved for their second in all things." She remarked and looked away from Clarke out to the rest of the ambassadors. "Clarke sits here because she shares my desire for peace among our people. She believes in the vision that we have the power to make a reality. She will help guide us to continued peace with Skaikru." She motioned to the chair. "Clarke?"

Clarke walked over and slowly sat in the chair next to questioning ambassadors.

"Heda, what of the Flamekeeper?" A third ambassador spoke up.

"Titus is no longer of our people."

"What of a new Flamekeeper? The teacher had students, Heda. Which will be chosen?" He asked.

"I will take time to consider my options before selecting a new Flamekeeper. We must be careful of Titus's students. It is possible he poisoned them against our plans for peace."

"And if he did?"  
"Then, there will be no Flamekeeper." Lexa glared at him. There were loud grumbles. "We will discuss this no more."

_____

Clarke walked into Lexa's room where she found the Commander changing into more comfortable clothes.

"Do you think that was the best idea?" Clarke asked her after closing the door to ensure the guards outside wouldn't hear her.

"Which part?" Lexa asked her.

Clarke walked up behind her and started untying the armor for her.

"The part where you gave me that chair. The part where you told them there might not be a Flamekeeper."

"You have earned that chair, Clarke and I cannot trust the students Titus taught to replace him one day. I have no way of knowing what they told him about you or about-"

"I know. I get it." Clarke finished untying it for her and Lexa slid it off her shoulders. "I'm just saying, it's a lot of change for them to take all at once. I thought we were going for a slower progression to give them time to-"

"I am tired of giving them time!" Lexa burst out and turned around. "I'm sorry."

"No, don't be." Clarke replied. "You wouldn't apologize to any of them. Don't apologize to me."

Lexa looked at her and tilted her head.

"You know it's not the same thing."

"What we're doing here hasn't exactly happened before, Lexa. I'm an ambassador, but I'm also your-" She stopped herself when she realized they hadn't really labeled what they are to one another. "We're also you and I." She finished and watched Lexa try to figure out what she almost said. "We need some ground rules or something."

"Our relationship has never required rules, Clarke." She reached for Clarke's hips. "That's what makes it special." She reached up to Clarke's shoulders and pushed at the jacket she'd been wearing to meet the other ambassadors. "You've always challenged my decisions. I see no reason why that has to stop now. That's why I gave you the chair." Clarke took the jacket and tossed it on the bed. "It's not because of you and I in here. It's because of you and I out there."

"You don't want me to give up being the ambassador, do you?" Clarke guessed. "It's why you didn't tell me about this before we went in that room."

"It's your decision, Clarke. It doesn't matter what I think." Lexa answered her and walked toward her bathroom.

"That's not what I asked you." Clarke sat on the edge of Lexa's bed and waited a moment for her to return sans war paint.

"You already know what I think about you, Clarke." Lexa wiped her hands on a rag. "I think you are a leader to your people."

"So, you do want me to remain an ambassador?"

"I already told you. It's not my decision." Lexa walked back into the bathroom and came back out without the rag. She stood in front of Clarke.

"You don't want to leave all this behind one day?" Clarke checked. "The decisions, the pressure, the life and death of it all?"

"I am the Commander. I don't have that option."

"What about life being about more than just surviving? About hoping that one day we won't owe our people?"

Lexa sat next to her.

"I still want that. I believe that." She replied and took Clarke's hand. "But that doesn't mean I can give up my role in all this."

Clarke knew she was right and that she would never ask Lexa to give up that part of herself, but she couldn't help feeling selfish again and wishing it were possible.

"I know."

"Why do you think I'm pushing so hard for peace?" She asked the blonde to her right and brushed hair away from her face so she could see her more clearly. "I was trying before, but I am pushing now, Clarke. Don't you see?"

"Yes."

"It's because I want those things to happen in my lifetime. I don't just want peace to be my legacy. I want to experience it myself. I want to watch my people life freely without fear of war or death. I want them to be able to walk across any land without fear of reprisal or punishment. I want a new civilization. I want my own moments of peace and happiness even… with you." She finished and Clarke turned to her.

"And what if I'm by your side, but not an ambassador?" Clarke looked toward the wall instead of at Lexa.

Lexa turned her head toward her.

"You will still be the woman I love. You don't need to be ambassador to be a leader, Clarke. You were a leader long before you had a title. You've been a leader to your people since you were on the Ark."

Clarke smiled softly at her and nodded.

"Clarke, you there?" It was Abby's voice on the radio. Clarke had been carrying it with her pretty much all the time since she'd left.

"Hold on." She told Lexa and reached in her jacket pocket to pull it out. "Mom, I'm here. Lexa's with me."

"The funeral for Pike was today. People have mostly calmed down. Some still want war. Kane's working on it, but he's had to lock a few of them up."

"Should we be worried?" Clarke asked.

"No, I don't think so. They'll calm down. Emotions are running high right now. Bellamy's taken responsibility. He'll have a trial, but Kane said he'll go easy on him since it was an accident." She paused and Clarke looked at Lexa. She'd filled her in on the actual events the day before. "Listen honey, I can't get away right now. I know I said I'd examine Lexa, but things are crazy here. We've got people joining Jaha left and right and Kane needs me here to stabilize things."

"I understand." Clarke offered and looked at Lexa.

"What if I go there?" Lexa asked Clarke.

"You want to go to Arkadia?" Clarke asked her and then said into the radio, "Mom, hold on a second."

"It might be good. Let the people there know the alliance is solid. Skaikru is a part of the coalition and I can release the blockade when we depart. Your doctors can examine me in secret while I'm there."

"You really are pushing for change, aren't you?" Clarke posited.

"I'll have all the ambassadors come along. They should meet with the people they've been opposing. Do you think Kane would agree?"

"What about Alie? Jaha is there. People are under her influence. It might be a bad idea to have you in the same place until we can figure this out."

"Abby will remove it. I won't be in danger."

"Mom, we've got another idea." Clarke said into the radio and explained Lexa's position. Abby agreed to discuss it with Kane and return when she had a response.

Clarke set the radio on Lexa's table by the bed.

"Will you sleep with me again tonight?" Lexa asked her. They'd spent the first night after her return in Clarke's bed and the previous night, they'd moved to Lexa's room.

"There's no where I'd rather be."

_____

A couple of hours later, they heard back from Abby while they lay tangled up in bed with clothing no longer separating them from one another. Kane agreed to the plan and they would leave the following day with the ambassadors to make the ride to Arkadia. Clarke fell asleep after, but woke to a missing Lexa not long after that and shifted to see her standing in front of her window with only a sheet wrapped around her.

"Lexa?" Clarke asked while wiping her eyes.

Lexa turned around.  
"Sorry, go back to sleep." She turned only her head.

Clarke didn't listen though and climbed out of bed. She stood naked behind Lexa who felt her approach and released the sheet around her so Clarke could take it and instead wrap it around both of them while she hugged her from behind.

"What's wrong?" Clarke asked as she kissed her shoulder and rested her chin there after.

"Nothing."

Clarke followed Lexa's stare out at a sleeping Polis. Random torches were still lit and there were a few stragglers walking the streets of the marketplace.

"I think we should try something new." She finally spoke.

Lexa looked over her shoulder and lifted an eyebrow.

"Not like that." Clarke smirked at her. "We don't need to try anything new there." She shared and kissed Lexa's lips while holding her closer. "We've always danced around what we wanted to say to one another. It was right there just below the surface, but we wouldn't say it out loud."

"Mm." Lexa agreed.

"Let's actually say it for once." She pecked her shoulder. "Tell me what you're thinking. All of it."

"I don't want to worry you."

"Fine. I'll start." Clarke compromised and rested her chin back on her shoulder. "I've never really been in a real relationship before." She confessed. "There was Finn, but that was… It wasn't the same. It wasn't even a relationship." She paused when she felt Lexa tense up at Finn's name. "This is though, Lexa. This is real. This is the most real thing I have." She felt her relax. "I want to share your worries. That's how this works between us. We've always shared the worries of our people, but we rarely share what we worry about as just Clarke and Lexa." She pressed her lips to her earlobe. "Please tell me what you're worried about."

"Am I a good Commander?" Lexa uttered barely above a whisper.  
"What?" Clarke wasn't expecting that.

"You asked what I was worried about."

"Is this about this?" Clarke moved Lexa's hair and kissed the tattoo and scar on her neck.

"What if it is what makes me Commander? With it removed, I am no longer the same?"

"I don't think that will happen. You are in control of your actions, Lexa. Your actions have made you Commander." Clarke paused. "Do you want to reconsider removing it?" She worried.

Lexa turned her head slightly back toward her.

"No, now that I know it is not what I was taught, I want it out. It's just-" She stopped herself and turned her body all the way in Clarke's arms. She placed her arms around Clarke's neck and Clarke's remained around her waist. The sheet clung to them, but neither of them were making any effort to hold it in place. "What I'm really worried about isn't whether or not I'll be the same Commander." She looked away from Clarke's eyes. "I'm worried I won't be the same me. I'm worried that it will change me so much, you…"

Clarke's eyes got big. Lexa hugged her close and Clarke held onto her tight.

"After everything we've been through, do you really think I can ever not love you?" It was all Clarke could say in response. She held her there in that spot as the sheet fell to the floor and they stood fully bare against one another for possibly the first time.

_____

The following day, they were well on their way to Arkadia. They rode amongst their party mostly in silence. They exchanged occasional glances and smiles at one another, but knew they couldn't speak too freely since there was a group of anxious ambassadors and guards around them.

They were about half way there when Clarke heard a sound from Lexa and she looked over to see her clutching at the back of her neck.

"Lexa?"

Before anything could be done, Lexa's eyes closed and her body flew off of her horse and hit the ground hard.

"Heda!"

"Lexa!" Clarke yelled and jumped off her horse; wasting no time with tying it up. Guards rushed to Lexa's side. Her eyes were still closed, but they appeared to be moving beneath the lids. "Lexa!" Clarke tried to get her to open her eyes.

"We must move her. We're in the open." One of the guards announced.

"No, hold on. We don't know what's wrong. She fell. We need to make sure she-"

"You are not in charge here, Skaikru." One of the ambassadors asserted.

Clarke stood and ran toward the man who was preventing her from taking care of Lexa.

"She made me her second. That makes me the one in charge right now." She stared him down for only a moment before she returned to Lexa's side. "We need to make sure we move her carefully."

"Set up camp. We'll remain here until Heda can be moved." One of the ambassadors issued. People began moving around them, but Clarke remained by Lexa's side. She held her hand and watched her restless eyes move quickly.

"Stay with me, please." She said to the girl on the ground.  
It didn't take long for a temporary tent to be setup where they could move Lexa. Clarke did the best she could to assess her and couldn't see any obvious injuries so she allowed them to carefully lift her and move her to the tent where she could lie down out of the sun and away from all the prying eyes.

"Ambassador, what would you like us to do?" One of the other ambassadors asked Clarke.

"Send a rider to go on to Arkadia. I'll stay with the Commander. Bring Abby back. Indra knows who she is. Tell her Lexa needs her now and she should bring her supplies." She was able to get out before he nodded and left them alone in the tent. There were 4 guards stationed around the tent for their protection and the rest of the ambassadors and the party remained outside. She could hear them talking. Some of them appeared to be genuinely worried about Lexa while some others continued to talk about how her new policies were not their way.

Clarke rolled her eyes, but renewed her focus on Lexa by undoing her armor and making her as comfortable as she could. She couldn't do anything else and it was killing her. All she could do was watch over her and wait. An hour into her wait, she felt Lexa take her hand and watched her eyes shoot open. She sat up almost immediately after and stared straight ahead.

"Lexa!"

"It knows I'm coming." She said after a moment.

Clarke put her hand on her back.

"Who knows? Lexa, lie back. You fell from your horse. We need to make sure you're okay before you start moving."

"I'm fine." She turned to look to Clarke. "Alie knows I'm coming. She's trying to connect with me. I can feel her."

"You can feel her?"

"She wants to destroy it. She's trying to do it now. It's like they're fighting one another. I can feel them both."

"Lie down for me, okay?"

Lexa did as she was told.

"I want it out, Clarke." She told her. "Now."

"My mom will be here soon. She-"

"I can't wait. It's like lightning." She closed her eyes and Clarke saw them move quickly again before she had to force them open. "We have to do it now or…" She closed her eyes again and her head fell to the side.

"Lexa? Lexa!" Clarke turned her face back toward her. She felt for a pulse. She was still alive. She considered her options and realized she had none. She ran outside the tent. "I need a knife now!" She yelled. The guards and ambassadors were confused. "Now! She repeated. A guard handed her a small knife. She didn't have time to sterilize it. They'd have to build a fire for that and Clarke had no idea what was going on inside Lexa's head. She ran back into the tent and the guard followed behind her. "Help me roll her over."

"Wanheda-"

"Just do it!" Clarke ordered and the guard helped her turn Lexa's body over. "Gon we!" She ordered him to leave. She knew Lexa wouldn't want him to see what was about to happen. He reluctantly nodded and did as she told. "Get it together, Clarke." She held the small knife to Lexa's skin. "Please…" She didn't know who she was talking too or what she was asking for really. She pressed the knife to Lexa's skin hoping she wouldn't feel it and pulled it downward until black blood started to trickle out. She held the knife in her hand unsure of what to do next other than wait. "Come on, Titus. Be right about this." She encouraged the air and stared at the blood as it continued to vacate its previous position. Just as she was about to give up and try to figure out her next step, something began to move inside Lexa's neck. Clarke watched the object remove itself just as Titus had said it would. She waited until it appeared to be done and she touched it lightly while trying to examine it closely. When nothing happened, she pulled until she saw tentacles emerge from Lexa's body. She had no idea what to do. She knew she would do more damage to the girl, but Lexa was unconscious and had warned her. Clarke had no choice. She pulled more until the tentacles were detached fully from Lexa's body and the blood began to pool in her wound. She sat the AI and the knife down and pressed her hand tightly against Lexa's neck. She tore at her shirt with her free hand and a piece from the bottom came off. She folded it with one hand and then lifted her other and pressed it to the wound and held it there. There was nothing more to do now, but wait. Wait and stare at the unconscious girl and the machine that nearly killed her as it rested next to her.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12:

"Clarke?"

Clarke heard a small voice.

"Lexa?" She questioned and looked down at her. Her eyes were open. She'd been unconscious for over an hour after Clarke pulled that thing out of her. "Don't move." She told her.

"Is it out?" She asked.

"Yes. Just stay still. Abby's on her way."

"Am I still me?" She heard her whisper and she wasn't sure if she was talking to her or if she was asking that of herself.

"Shhh…" Clarke rubbed her back with her free hand. "It's okay. Just hang on."

Lexa's eyes closed again and Clarke changed the cloth on her neck after she called the guard in and he gave her a new one along with some water so she could clean up a little. The bleeding had stopped. The cut wasn't that big, but Clarke worried about infection just as much as she worried about how removing the thing might impact Lexa.

"Wanheda, the sun is almost down. We should setup camp here for the night."

"Fine." She told the guard.

"The ambassadors will want to hear it from you."

"Tell them I won't leave her so they'll have to take your word for it." She replied.

She heard a car engine and recognized it as her mom finally arriving. She wanted to go greet her, but she couldn't leave Lexa's side. So, she waited a few minutes until Abby made her way into the small tent.

"What the hell happened?" She asked and immediately took Clarke's spot. Clarke stood off to her side.

"She collapsed. We were on our way to Arkadia. She grabbed the back of her neck. She was in pain. She fell from her horse. I checked her out. She seems fine physically."

"Clarke?" Abby noticed the object. "What is this?"  
"She was unconscious when we brought her here, mom. She woke up and told me it was hurting her. She needed it out. I had to-"  
"You performed surgery here?" Abby questioned her daughter while she rifled through her bag.

"I didn't have a choice."

"Come over here. I need your help." Abby ordered. "How did you get it out?" She asked as Clarke knelt next to her and held onto items Abby passed her.

"I didn't. It came out on its own. I just did the incision. I didn't have anything to close it so I've just been putting pressure on it."

"What do you mean-" She started. "Never mind. You didn't touch anything inside?" She asked, referring to Lexa's neck.

"No."

"You should have waited for me, Clarke. This was reckless."

"I didn't have a choice, mom. You didn't see her."

Abby looked at Clarke for a moment before filling a syringe with medicine and injecting it into Lexa.

"Let's just hope it doesn't get infected. Open that." Abby told Clarke. She opened an item she recognized. It was a skin glue gun they used to close wounds when they were small enough.

Abby cleaned Lexa's wound and checked it to make sure there wasn't anything foreign in there that shouldn't be and then sealed it before applying a small bandage.

Clarke watched her work; admiring her mother's effortless ability to remain calm in these situations. Clarke looked down at her own now free hands and noticed that they were shaking.

"Will she be okay?"

"Medically, she should be fine. Although, I do want her to come to Arkadia and have a full set of x-rays and tests. We'll take her in the car after I finish my initial exam here." Abby paused and looked at Clarke. "Honey, you're shaking." She took both of Clarke's hands.

"I thought I lost her." Clarke finally said out loud without taking her eyes off of Lexa's unconscious form.

Abby stared at her daughter and finally realized something. Her daughter loved the girl next to her. She loved her with her whole heart.

"You risked your life for her, didn't you? I never got the whole story, but you moved in front of the bullet to save her, didn't you?"

Clarke met her mother's eye.

"Why isn't she waking up?" She asked instead of answering her mother.

"I don't know, honey. Why don't you go get some air? I need to examine her. Make sure she didn't break anything or get hurt in the fall and then we can take her to Arkadia."

"I'll help you." Clarke let go of her mother's hands.

"Honey, it's okay. I promise. Go get some air. It'll just be a few minutes. I'll get you if she wakes up."

Clarke took a few steps back. The guards had placed a small stool by the entrance to the tent. Clarke had yet to use it, but she found herself in need of a place to sit so she sat on it.

"I'll just wait here."

Abby nodded and went to work. She pulled up Lexa's shirt, revealing her tattoos and Clarke recalled that day when she'd seen them up close for the first time. She'd touched them and she'd seen Lexa smile that smile. Abby pressed her fingers and hands and moved them to her legs and her arms. She rolled Lexa over on her own even though Clarke stood to help. She'd felt her neck and her collarbone. Clarke couldn't take her eyes off of Lexa's closed ones. She noticed they seemed to be at rest now, but she wasn't sure if that was a good or a bad thing.

"Okay honey, she's fine. I'll still do x-rays, but we can move her." Abby stood and packed her bag. She walked outside the tent and gave instructions to the guards and updated the ambassadors on the plan. She reentered the tent and found Clarke kneeling by Lexa's side holding one hand while her other was on her stomach. "They say they need to talk to you." Two guards followed her in. "They're going to move her now, Clarke."

Clarke stood wordlessly and made her way outside while the guards carried Lexa to the car and Abby followed.

"Wanheda?"

"The Commander will be fine. Arkadia is closer and has a hospital. The doctors there will look at her."

"We should alert-"

"There's no need to alert anyone. You should camp here for the night and follow in the morning. The Commander will be awake by then and we can plan for the meeting with Skaikru leaders."

The ambassadors didn't exactly believe her, but they didn't exactly challenge her either.

_____

Abby drove quickly through the open fields that led to Arkadia while Clarke remained in the back holding onto Lexa's hand and running her other hand through her hair periodically.

She leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"Please be okay." She whispered in her ear. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Clarke lifted her head to see Lexa's eyes looking back at hers. Clarke sighed.

"You're awake. Mom, she's awake."

Abby looked in the rearview mirror.

"Good. We're almost there."

Lexa tried to sit up.

"What are you doing? Lie down, Lexa."

"I feel fine, Clarke."  
"Lexa, lie down. I still need to run some tests."

Lexa didn't listen. She felt the back of her neck instead.

"Where is it?" She asked Clarke.

"It's in my bag." Clarke responded. "Just lie back for me. Please."

Lexa listened as Clarke's arms helped her lie back.

"You took it out?"

"Yes."

"Thank you."  
"Don't thank me." Clarke replied. "We don't know if there are any consequences to what I did yet."

Lexa smiled at her.

"It wanted out. I'll be fine."  
"What do you mean it wanted out?"

"I don't know how to explain it. It wanted out. It's under attack, Clarke. Alie wants it destroyed. She wants us all destroyed. I could feel it. She's working in Arkadia; trying to gather support. Alie 2 is better. It seeks to work with us."

"Okay. Just rest. We'll figure this out later after some tests."

"I don't need tests, Clarke."  
"Lexa, please. For me."

Lexa nodded and smiled at Clarke.

"I feel lighter."

Clarke didn't know what to make of that.

"We're here." Abby parked the car. "I'll send someone out to help lift her."

"I can walk." Lexa sat back up.

"Lexa!" Clarke tried to push her back down.

"Clarke, I promise you." She put her hand on Clarke's. "I am fine." She put her legs over the side of the table she'd been lying on. "I can walk on my own. I don't want anyone here to see me as weak right now either. Do you have my armor?" Lexa asked. Clarke smiled at her and grabbed the armor she'd managed to take with her for some reason. She passed it to Lexa and began helping her put it on.

"Why are you smiling?" Lexa queried.

Abby opened the back of the truck.

"Because you were worried you wouldn't be the same." She met her eyes. "You're still just as stubborn and frustrating and you're still the Commander."

They shared one of their silences before climbing out of the car and while Abby and Clarke were intent on trying to help her, Lexa was walking fine on her own. She really did appear to be fine. Clarke would still insist on the tests, but as they walked through the camp and saw several sets of eyes watching them, Lexa was every bit the strong Commander she needed to be. Clarke was happy about her decision to leave the guards behind with the ambassadors. It made Lexa look less intimidating her arriving alone.

_____

Abby led the two of them to medical after dismissing the others there so they could have privacy. Clarke watched Lexa undergo tests she was only really submitting to because Clarke asked her.

"How is she?" Kane asked as he approached with Indra.

"I don't know. She seems fine." Clarke responded.

"Abby filled me in. Did you really take it out of her in a tent?"

"I didn't have a choice. I thought she was dying."

"Where is it? We should get it to Raven-"  
"Raven?" Clarke turned to him. "My mom said she's with Jaha."

"She's still one of our best engineers and we just need her to look at it. Tell us what she can figure out."

"No." Clarke shook her head sideways.

Kane looked at Indra and then back to Clarke.

"The Commander should make the decision." Indra shared.

Clarke nodded at her.

"She's right. Lexa understands this thing better than any of us. She should decide what happens to it." Clarke turned back to Lexa who was in the other room, but they could watch from where they were. Her mom had just wrapped up another round of tests and was leaving the room. She drew the curtain so Lexa could get dressed.

"Her blood is black." Abby pointed out. "That's still strange to me, but preliminary tests are good. I still have some I want to run and we'll wait for the final results from everything, but other than the cut on her neck that will heal, she appears to be fine."

Clarke watched her mother snap off her gloves and toss them in the trash.

"Can I see her?"

"Sure honey, but she's getting dressed. Give her-"Abby started. Clarke moved past her and in Lexa's direction. "Or not."

"I should see to the Commander." Indra began moving toward the door to the room.

Kane held out his hand and lightly touched her bicep.

"Why don't you give them a minute?"

Indra looked at Kane defiantly at first and then saw two shadows hugging behind a curtain and nodded in agreement.

"How do you feel?" Clarke asked her.

"Fine, Clarke." Lexa responded as she pulled away from the hug.

"Doesn't it seem like we're always checking on each other's injuries?"

Lexa didn't respond this time. She put her hand on the back of Clarke's neck and pulled her in. Their lips met tentatively at first before Clarke gave in and kissed her. Her hands went to Lexa's face and their kiss heated up and Lexa's hand went to the small of her back. She peaked her tongue out and Clarke smiled at that as hers started playing with it before focusing back on her lips. They finally pulled back.

"I'm okay."

"You know they're watching us, right?" Clarke checked and nodded to the side with her head. She couldn't tell for sure, but she could guess that Kane, Indra and Abby had just watched them kiss. "I'm sure Indra will have something to say about it."

"I'm more worried about your mom than I am Indra." Lexa replied and Clarke had to say, she really did seem lighter. She seemed herself still, but happier somehow.

"Did you just make a joke?" Clarke smiled at her.

"Will you do something for me?" Lexa avoided her question.

"Sure."

"Will you introduce me to her?"

"My mom? I think you've met." Clarke stood a little confused.

"Not as the Commander; as…" She faded and Clarke recognized that as happy as Lexa seemed, she was still the same woman who had a hard time actually saying things out loud and would instead probably always require Clarke to be able to read her mind. Clarke had no problem with that.

"Oh." She smiled at her. "Come on." Clarke took her hand and walked her out of the room toward where her mom was alone, staring at a screen. "Where's Kane? Indra?"

"Kane went to meet with Jaha. He's been trying to convince him to slow down this City of Light thing until we can all talk about it now that Pike's gone, but Jaha's stubborn. Indra went outside to meet with the other generals and let them know you're okay." She looked at Lexa and then looked down at their joined hands.

"Mom…" Clarke couldn't believe what she was about to do. "This is Lexa."

Abby looked confused.

"I know that, honey."

"No, I mean… this is Lexa. She's…" Clarke looked at Lexa for a moment. "Girlfriend doesn't seem like the right word." Lexa looked down for a moment and then looked at Abby hopefully.

"Because what you have seems like more than that? More than some label you put on it?" Abby looked at her daughter.

"How did-"

"Because that's how I felt about your father, Clarke." She shrugged. "It's nice to meet you… Lexa." She held out her hand and Lexa took it. She nodded and Clarke just stood there admiring her mom for the second time in a very long day. "I've got a room setup for you. Follow me. It's not exactly what you're used to in Polis, but-"

"It will be fine." Lexa expressed. "And thank you for what you did for me today."

"Don't thank me. It was Clarke's quick thinking that got that thing out of you." She started walking them down the hall. "You two are getting a little too practiced at saving each other's lives." A few minutes later, they arrived at the room Abby had setup. "This is yours." She opened the door and motioned. "There's food out for you already and the cafeteria is closed now, but it opens in the morning for breakfast. We can have something brought in if you'd prefer not to join everyone though, Comm-" She stopped. "Lexa."

"That won't be necessary."

"Okay. Well, you'll have to wait in line like the rest of us then." Abby shared as they all still stood outside the room.

"We've made arrangements for the rest of your party to have rooms as well. Some of us are bunking together to make space, but we want them to know we're glad you're all here." Abby explained.  
"Can you tell me where Clarke's room just in case?" Lexa asked.

Abby looked at Clarke.

"I assumed you two would want to share a room." Abby replied. "Clarke's welcome to bunk with me though."

"We're good. Thanks, mom." Clarke smiled at her mother as she pushed Lexa lightly forward into the room.

"Good night, ladies."

"Night." Clarke closed the door, leaving them alone. "Sorry, no candles or fur in Arkadia." Clarke stated to break the silence as she watched Lexa look around the small space, which had a bed, a small table, two chairs, a kitchen table that sat only two and a counter alongside a closet like the one Octavia had hid inside to help Clarke take down Pike. There were two trays of food on the table. "Are you hungry? You should probably eat something."

"All our stuff is still at the camp." Lexa realized.

"Uh, yeah. I guess." Clarke thought about how she'd been so concerned for Lexa that she'd left their bags behind with the rest of the party.

Lexa's armor had been removed for the tests and they'd left that in medical accidentally. She was left in only the shirt Clarke recalled undoing for her before their first time together and her pants, which she watched Lexa pull off along with her underwear. Clarke stood there in awe of the girl she was watching. She knew her mom was right earlier. There was no label that could describe what they were to each other. She walked toward Lexa who was facing away from her and she undid the string and watched as the shirt fell away from her shoulders as it had done that day. She brushed her hair to the side so she could see her neck and when she saw that Abby had removed the bandage, she knew the cut was already almost healed. Lexa lifted her arms and Clarke pulled off the remainder of her clothing.

"Are you hungry?" Lexa asked her when she turned around and lifted Clarke's arms in the air so she could pull her shirt off for her.

"No." Clarke let Lexa undress her completely.

"Come to bed then." Lexa pulled her by the hand toward the bed that was just big enough for the two of them to share and definitely wasn't as luxurious as what they were used to in Polis. It was Lexa that pulled back the blankets and readied it for both of them. Clarke just watched she she climbed in first and then motioned for Clarke to join her.

"You almost died again today and you're the one taking care of me. How did that happen?" Clarke asked when she found herself on her back and Lexa was half on top of her, pulling the blankets up to their waists.

"I didn't almost die today." She leaned down and kissed Clarke's lips.

"We should sleep. It's been a long day."

"Are you tired?" Lexa asked her while moving her lips to Clarke's neck.

"What's gotten into you?" Clarke laughed while Lexa climbed fully on top of her.

"I told you." She looked down at her. "I'm happy. You make me happy, Klark kom Skaikru and I never thought I'd be happy."

Lexa leaned back down and kissed her forehead.

"No." Clarke said. Lexa looked at her confused. "No, I'm not tired." Clarke pulled her face toward her and reconnected their lips. She could feel Lexa's smile until it finally faded so their kiss could intensify. Their tongues danced before Lexa moved back to Clarke's neck. Clarke's hand moved up and down her back and then held onto her hips when Lexa used her legs to spread Clarke's apart and started moving her hips down while continuing to move from Clarke's neck to her earlobe, collar bone, lips and jaw line.

_____

"Good morning." Clarke greeted Lexa's tired eyes. She'd held onto her all night; afraid to let her go given what she'd been through that day. She kissed her gently.

"Good morning."

"We should get dressed and go down to breakfast. The ambassadors will be here soon if they're not already and Kane will want to get the meetings started."

"Where is it?"

"Where's what?"

"Alie 2."

"You say that like you're friends." Clarke climbed out of the bed and walked toward the one bag she did remember to bring.

"It feels like that in a way. It's hard to explain."

"You said that yesterday. You also said it felt like lightning in your head so I'm not exactly sure it's so friendly." Clarke put on her shirt, which was still torn and the rest of her clothing from yesterday. She grabbed at her bag and sat back down on the edge of the bed. Lexa leaned on her side and put her hand on the small of Clarke's back while she kissed her shoulder just to be touching her somehow. Clarke pulled out a piece of cloth that had smears of black on it and unfolded it. "Here it is. Kane wanted to give it to Raven to look at it, but-"  
"She can't, Clarke. She's in the City of Light. Alie will use her to destroy it."

"Why don't we just destroy it? It's no longer inside you. What's stopping us from just beating it with a hammer or throwing it in a river?"

Lexa sat up behind her.

"We can't. We may need to use it to destroy Alie 1."

"It's not inside you anymore, Lexa."

"We should head down to breakfast. Is there somewhere we can lock it up for now?"

Clarke watched as she climbed out of bed and began getting dressed.

"You know, you are different." Clarke said out loud before thinking about it.

Lexa stopped her movements.

"Bad?" She hung her head.

Clarke stood and helped her with the string on her shirt.

"No. It's just… different. You're able to think about things other than war and peace."

Lexa smiled and laid her head back against Clarke's shoulder as she stood behind her.

"You know I can only be like this with you." It wasn't said in a romantic way. It was the logical side of her responding. They couldn't talk like this among anyone else and out there, business was life and death. Breakfast with Skaikru was a political move meant to warm them up to the idea of the grounders and the coalition. Her ability to shift back and forth between topics of love and war would only be used with Clarke.

"I know. Come on. We'll bring it with us until I can find somewhere safe for it."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13:

They walked in the direction of the cafeteria and Clarke kept Lexa at her side just in case someone tried something. She couldn't yet trust that everyone that supported Pike would be calm enough to move on.

"Wait." She grabbed Lexa's arm and pulled her back. They stood in the doorway of a large room where Jaha was standing and passing something out to people in a line. "There must be 10 people in line." She announced and looked around at a group of about 20 that were sitting on the floor with their legs crossed and their eyes closed.

"Alie." Lexa stated.

Clarke watched as he handed them each a silver, coin sized object.

"We should stop him." Clarke tried to walk into the room.

"Clarke, no." Lexa pulled her back. "Not now. We must meet with Kane and the other ambassadors. We can't fix this right now. We can fix the alliance."

"Clarke, I didn't know you were back." Raven walked down the hall toward them.

"Raven, your leg?" Clarke looked at the girl who could barely walk before and was now apparently walking with no problem.

"It's the City of Light." She smiled.

Clarke wasn't sure she'd ever seen Raven smile like that.

"Raven, you know it's not real, right?" Clarke tried.

"It's very real, Clarke. There's no pain. Only light. Alie wants us all to join her."

"Raven-"

"Clarke." Lexa stopped her and placed her hand on her arm. "You can't."

"Well, goodbye." Raven seemed almost robotic, but happy at the same time.

"That was not Raven."

"We'll get her back, Clarke. Come on."

Clarke watched as Raven joined the others in the room until Lexa pulled her along toward the cafeteria.

"Good morning, Commander." Kane greeted and stood when he saw Clarke and Lexa enter. "And Ambassador." He looked toward Clarke.

"Good morning, Chancellor." Lexa replied.

"Abby said you'd be joining us. I took the liberty of having food brought to the table for us."

"That wasn't necessary, but thank you." She looked around as every pair of eyes in the room seemed to be locked on her.

"This way." He motioned for them to follow. "Your ambassadors have arrived. They decided to remain outside Arkadia until our meeting this morning. They asked about you and I assured them with Indra's help that you are fine."

"Heda." Indra greeted her and then gave Clarke a glare. "Clarke."

"Ambassador, Indra." Lexa corrected.

"Apologies." Indra nodded at Clarke reluctantly.

Lexa sat down and Clarke sat next to her with Indra on her other side and Octavia on Clarke's side.  
"Her attitude isn't about you." Lexa whispered in her ear.  
"Oh, it is." Clarke whispered back. "It just has nothing to do with me being an ambassador."

Lexa let out a shy smile at her.

"Chancellor, how are things in Arkadia?" Lexa asked. She wasn't interested, it seemed, in the food in front of her, but wanted to begin the first of many conversations about how to navigate this new alliance.

"Pike's death came as a shock to everyone." He lied. There were prying ears around that didn't know the truth. "We're doing what we can to pick up the pieces, but I've been assured by the station leaders that most of their people are on board with the coalition and those that aren't will likely be soon."

"That is good news."

Abby joined the table.

"Good morning. I only have a few minutes until I need to get back to medical."

"Abby never takes a break." Kane shared with the group.

"It's a good thing she doesn't." Lexa commented and nodded in Abby's direction.

"Indra will be joining me. We're going to take a look at that gunshot wound; make sure it's healing. Right, Indra?" Abby glared at her. "You've been resisting my help since you got here. Don't you think it's time you let me take a look?"

"Indra will join you in medical. I need my most trusted leaders beside me." Lexa replied for Indra. "Healthy." She completed.

"Sha, Heda." She begrudgingly replied to Lexa. "I will be there." She said to Abby.

"Clarke, can I talk to you in private for a moment?" Kane asked. He looked at Abby and then they both looked at Clarke.

Lexa looked at him and then at Clarke.

"Whatever you want to say to me, you can say in front of everyone here." Clarke assured.

Kane clasped his hands in front of him.

"Well, your mother and I were talking."

"This can't end well." Octavia finally spoke up.

"Abby would have been a good choice as Vice Chancellor, but she has declined to focus on being our doctor."

Lincoln approached and sat next to Octavia. He started eating right away and failed to notice that everyone at the table was looking at either Kane or Clarke for a moment.

"Chit?" He asked. What?

"Osir na dig em au." We'll find out, Octavia told him.

"You have been a leader to our people since we landed, Clarke." Kane continued. "You would be my choice as Vice Chancellor."

"What?" Octavia questioned.

"Now, I'm only acting Chancellor. We will have an election and I believe I will win. I think I'll be running unopposed, but I would like you to be beside me. I would like you to become Vice Chancellor and help me make the decisions for the people of Skaikru."

Clarke was in shock. She did not expect this.

"That would mean that Clarke would remain in Arkadia." Lexa finally broke the silence at the table.

"Yes, we would choose another Ambassador to act in our interests in Polis."

"Clarke?" Abby checked in.

Clarke was resisting looking at Lexa.

"I… I'd have to think about it."

She felt Lexa's hand make its way to her thigh. No one else would have been able to see.

"Clarke, he just asked you to be Vice Chancellor." It was Octavia's voice. "That's way better than Ambassador." She looked at Lexa. "Sorry, Lexa."

"Octavia!" Indra chastised.

"I didn't mean any disrespect." She told Indra.

"Go see to the ambassadors. Take Lincoln with you. Let them know the meeting will take place in one hour." Indra ordered. "I will join Abby in medical." She nodded toward Abby. "Commander." She stood.

"I guess I'm going back to work." Abby stood as well. "Clarke, consider what Marcus is offering. I know… you have other things to consider as well. Just consider what he's saying too."

She walked off with Indra. Octavia and Lincoln were close behind.

"I didn't mean to spring this on you, Clarke and I mean no disrespect to you, Lexa. If you both feel Clarke should remain in Polis as our ambassador, I will respect that."

"This is not my decision to make. It is for Clarke to decide. Excuse me." She stood abruptly, removing her hand from Clarke's leg and heading off out of the cafeteria.

"I'm sorry, Clarke. I should have insisted we talk privately."

"It's fine. I'll meet you with the others later." She stood and followed Lexa who was on her own walking down the halls of Arkadia. She must have been moving quickly because Clarke was unable to catch her before she made it outside the building itself.

"Lexa, what happened?" Clarke asked her.

"Nothing. I just wanted to check on the ambassadors and get our things. I need to change before the meeting."

Clarke reached out for her hand.

"Hey, stop. I didn't know that was going to happen."

Lexa glared at her.

"Not out here, Clarke." She released Clarke's hold on her and walked toward the gate. It was opened for her and the grounders that had been at Arkadia for days waiting on either war or resolution, roared with applause at seeing their Commander. Clarke heard her issue an order. There would be no war and the blockade was over. They could all return to their homes. There were grunts of disappointment, but also cheers that at least the waiting was over. She watched her walk further on and meet up with the group of ambassadors and guards and motion for them to come inside. She walked with them past her before she stopped and allowed them to continue on with Octavia and Lincoln offering directions. Clarke hesitated before moving beside her.

"Can we talk?" Clarke asked her.

"I'm having our things taken to the room."

Clarke walked beside her and two guards remained outside their room when they walked in and closed the door behind them.

"Lexa, talk to me." Clarke requested.

Lexa was focused on getting fresh clothes out of her bag.

"The ambassadors are waiting, Clarke."

"I don't care about the ambassadors. I care about you." She put her hand on top of Lexa's to stop her from going through the bag.

"I know you do, Clarke, but you also care about your people."

"So?"

"So, your place is here. You'll accept Kane's offer and you'll be the Vice Chancellor and you'll remain in Arkadia."

"I thought you said this was my decision."

Lexa finally looked at her.

"I'm not making the decision for you. I just know what you're going to do."

"I didn't even want to be an ambassador after all this. What makes you think I want to be Vice Chancellor?"

Lexa turned to her.

"What would you do if you weren't an ambassador, Clarke? If you don't become Vice Chancellor?"

Clarke thought about it for a moment.  
"I don't know." She answered finally and smiled. "And I'm okay with that right now. Look, I know you think I was born to lead my people and maybe I was, but that doesn't mean that's what I want to do, Lexa. It was different for you. You were raised to be a Commander. It was always a part of your destiny. I was just Clarke Griffin on the Ark before this whole thing happened. I thought I'd follow my parents and become a scientist because artist wasn't a profession on the Ark."

"You wanted to be an artist?" Lexa asked her softly as if realizing for the first time that Clarke had not had the same experience as she did with becoming a leader.

"I was a kid. I don't know. It wasn't an option anyway. It still isn't. Maybe I'll help the healers or maybe I'll stay an ambassador. Right now, I just want to go to this meeting, solidify the alliance, figure out what to do with this AI in my pocket and get all my friends away from Alie."

"We should change." Lexa tossed a shirt in Clarke's face and released a hesitant smile.

_____

"We're here to unite all clans under the coalition." Lexa began. The room was setup with a round table with enough seats for each leader including Kane. Clarke was once again to Lexa's right and it was obvious that people still weren't happy with it. Indra remained in the corner looking on while Abby stood next to her. No one else would be permitted in this meeting. "Skaikru Chancellor, Marcus Kane, you are welcome in our coalition."

"Thank you, Commander." He stood. "Skaikru would like to thank the Commander and all of you for allowing us to handle internal matters and rejoin the alliance."

Lexa motioned for him to sit and she sat as well.

"King Roan wanted me to relay the message that Azgeda is as committed to the alliance as you are, Commander and he sends his regrets for not being able to attend himself." The ambassador of Ice Nation conveyed. "He also extended an invitation for the Commander and Wanheda to visit Ice Nation as his guests at any time."

"Give King Roan my regards."

Clarke remained silent.

"What are we to do with our lands?" Another ambassador spoke up. "Skaikru attempted to take them from us."

"That was a mistake." Kane shared.

"Skaikru won't attempt to take any lands." Clarke announced. "But they need to be able to plant crops and build homes of their own. Skaikru would be willing to share any of our technology with everyone. Medicine, farming, engineering." Clarke continued and Lexa just watched her.

"We'd be happy to discuss trading whatever we have for parcels of land to farm and we will gladly share our crop with those who need it." Marcus continued.

Lexa looked down for a moment. Kane and Clarke already worked so well together. She tried to push it out of her mind and trust in what Clarke told her.

"I trust that all of you can work together to find land that Skaikru can farm." Lexa spoke up. "In exchange, they will come up with a plan to teach us their ways."

"We don't want to learn their ways." A normally silent ambassador blurted out. "Heda, we do not need their technology, their food."

"No one will force you to take it." Lexa retorted. "Skaikru is offering what they have, but I will not force any clans to accept their offer." She stood. "I will, however, enforce the alliance and the peace between us that now exists."

The rest of the meeting saw some arguing and yelling and Lexa shutting them up several times, but it also saw a few clans agreeing to send healers to medical to learn from Skaikru doctors, two clans offering to give up small pieces of land for farming. They would even show Skaikru how to farm the radiated earth. The Arkadia engineers would be escorted to other lands to check them for the possible building of homes, schools, and whatever other structures needed to be built. The Ark, in space, was already falling apart. On the ground, it was holding up a little better, but eventually all the people residing inside its small quarters would need homes of their own for the families they were now free to have without worry about oxygen or food shortages.

The ambassadors were all taken to their rooms. Clarke watched them all look confused at the structure as they were walked through it and she was sure they'd never stayed in rooms like these before. After they were allowed time to settle in, there was a group lunch that was more social than formal. Clarke watched Kane mingle and occasionally laugh. She even saw that he was able to make a couple of ambassadors laugh at something he said.

"You sure you don't want this?" Lexa questioned as she arrived to stand next to her; looking on at the room of clan leaders.

"What he's doing right now…" Clarke began. "I can't do that." She looked at Lexa. "And I don't want too either. I'm going to turn him down, Lexa."

Lexa smiled only momentarily before shielding it from view.

"Would the ambassador like to remain at Polis?"

"The ambassador would like that very much." Clarke took a drink to cover her smile.

"I will ensure your room is cleaned for your return." Lexa shared.

"Why?" Clarke asked and glanced at her. "Will I need it?"

Lexa looked at the floor.

"I suppose not."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14:

"Kane, got a minute?" Clarke knocked on Marcus's door.

"Of course. Come in, Clarke." He took a drink of his coffee and motioned for her to enter. She sat on the stool across from him as he looked at plans of Arkadia.

"I can't be your Vice Chancellor."

He looked up and nodded.

"You want to stay at Polis."

"Yes."

"I stand by my offer. You would be a great Vice Chancellor, but for what it's worth, I am happy for you, Clarke." He paused. "Coffee?"

"No thanks."

"I was worried about you after Mount Weather. So, was your mother. Bellamy, Raven. Everyone."

"I know. I just needed-"  
"You don't have to explain yourself. I understand. I just wanted to say that I'm happy to see you're thriving."

"Thank you."

"I don't think I've ever seen you smile as much as I have since you got here." He told her. Clarke laughed under her breath. "And I've definitely never seen Lexa smile."

"She hides it well."

"She's been having a hard time since you've been here."

"I don't want to leave here with anything unfinished, Kane."

"Ah, Jaha."

Clarke pulled the AI out of her pocket.

"We need someone to look at this. Tell us what they can about it. It can't be someone that's already taken the chip though."

"Who do you suggest?"

"Monty. I trust him."

"Okay. I'll arrange for him to take a look at it with you."

"Thanks."

"What do you plan to do when you find out whatever you find out?"

"Alie needs to be destroyed." Clarke pointed out.

"I agree, but how do we do that? I'm not even sure I understand how all this works."

"I do." It was Murphy's voice. He stood in the doorway.

"Murphy?" Kane questioned.

"I heard it was finally all clear in here."

"It is." Clarke replied. "Come in."

"Alie's in his pack. That thing he carries. You need to get a hold of that. Destroy it."

"And what about the people that have taken the chip? What happens to them?" Kane took another drink of his coffee.

"The thing dies, the chips die." Murphy answered him. "Or at least that's what I think."

"How do we get the pack from Jaha?"

Murphy stood off to the side and tossed an apple in the air before setting it down.

"I'm no martyr or anything, but Jaha's been trying to get me on board from the beginning. He locked me in a damn room until I almost killed myself. If I do it right, maybe I can convince him that I want to play and snag the pack."

"Could work." Kane offered up. "I'll get Monty to meet you in your room so it's private. After dinner."

"What do I do?" Murphy asked.

"Walk around. Let people see you're back, but don't engage any of them yet. Let's see if we can get Jaha to come to you. Less suspicious that way." Clarke stood. "If he does, make sure you turn him down again. Say you're just here for the food or something. Keep it realistic."

"So act like a jackass?" He picked up the apple. "I'm good at that."

"We know." Kane pointed out and took another drink of his coffee.

"Lexa is supposed to leave with the ambassadors in the morning. We should wait to take care of this until after they're gone."

"We?" Murphy questioned her word. "You're sticking around for this? Shouldn't you be heading back with Commander Lexa?"

"I need to see this through." Clarke put Alie 2 back in her pocket for safe keeping and turned to Kane. "How's Bellamy?" She asked.

"It's probably best if you leave him alone for now, Clarke. He's in solitary."

"Solitary? I thought you were going to take it easy on him. He didn't actually kill Pike."  
"He requested it. Said he needed the time to himself." Kane set his coffee down. "There will be a trial next week. A tribunal. He won't be there for long. I think we can all admit this place got a little out of control and people did things they're not proud of. I wouldn't be surprised if he takes off for a while afterwards though. Seems like he could use some space."

Clarke walked toward the door thinking about how that was her not so long ago.

"Be smart, Murphy." She told him.

"Always am." He walked out before her.

"I'll be in my room."

"Monty will be by later."

"Murphy, you're back here? Haven't gotten yourself killed yet?" Clarke heard someone ask Murphy down the hall.

"Just here for the free food and showers." He gave a snarky reply.

_____

Clarke returned to her room in the late afternoon. Lexa was sitting at the kitchen table looking over documents from the earlier meeting. Clarke walked past her to reach the water they had on the counter and used the opportunity to graze her hand from one of Lexa's shoulders to the other as she did.

"How was Kane?" Lexa asked.

"He's sending Monty here after dinner to take a look at this." She pulled out the AI and sat it on the counter. "Murphy's back. He's going to try to get in with Jaha and steal Alie 1. He might actually be able to pull it off." She took a sip of water and looked at Lexa who was still looking at the papers on the table and had yet to make eye contact. "And I turned down Vice Chancellor officially if you're curious."

That got her attention. She released the paper she'd been holding and turned toward Clarke.

"And you're-"

"Yes, I'm sure." She completed Lexa's sentence.

Lexa turned to her and smirked.

"Very well." She returned to her papers. "It will take some time, but I think you'll have the lands you need to at least move 20% of your population out of Arkadia and onto clan lands by the end of this year. I had a meeting with the others after you left for Kane's and it took some convincing, but I think they're starting to understand that this means life for their people instead of more death."

Clarke sat down at the table.

"Did you and I just have an exchange about how our days were? Are we actually becoming a normal couple?" She looked at the papers instead of Lexa.

"You and I will never be normal, Clarke."

"I didn't mean the leader of people thing."

"Neither did I." Lexa expressed.

"20%, huh?" Clarke revisited with a shy smile.

"Yes." Lexa started. She continued with the ideas shared from her meeting and showed Clarke on the plans where buildings and farms could go. Clarke pointed out things she'd missed and Lexa explained things Clarke hadn't considered. They talked like that for a while. Clarke made coffee and they both sipped on it, but Clarke more than Lexa. She still wasn't accustomed to the drink. At one point, Clarke could see her straining to focus after the long couple of days she'd had so she stood and massaged her shoulders while she continued to glare at documents as if they themselves would provide answers.

Being Commander had its benefits and they had their dinner brought to the room. Clarke forced her to put the work away, but it didn't take that much convincing. She could see Lexa wanted a break. They ate at the table with few words throughout, but they shared stolen glances like they had since they'd met and Lexa put her hand on her leg until Clarke covered it in her own and brought it back to the table so she could play with her fingers.

Monty showed up just as they were finishing and brought some equipment to analyze Alie 2. He sat silently and worked for the first several minutes after his arrival while the two of them stared on from the edge of the bed where they sat.

"You two staring at me the whole time isn't really going to speed up the process."

"We don't really have anything else to do." Clarke replied. "What are you doing anyway?"

"I've connected it to a computer on a local network. It's not connected to anything on the Ark. These things… are like little antenna. They're connecting wirelessly to my computer, but I don't want to risk it getting on the Ark's network yet." He continued typing. "That's weird."

"What?" Lexa stood.

Clarke put her hand on her arm and she sat back down.

"It's so cool. The code on this thing is next level and that's saying something since thing's been around for like 100 years, right? Whoever built this is a genius."

"That genius also invented the thing that destroyed the planet, Monty."

"This could take me months; maybe years to understand. I may never be able to understand it."

"I can." Lexa shared. Her hands were clasped in her lap.

"No offense, but you don't exactly strike me as an expert on artificial intelligence." His eyes got big. "Commander."

"Monty, that thing was inside her."

"What? Nobody told me that. You were connected to this?"

"Yes." Lexa explained the belief that it was the spirit of the Commanders and the history of it.

"Whoa. I can tell you it's definitely no one's spirit." He shrugged. "Sorry."

"What else can you tell us?"

"Only thing I can tell you without working on this for the rest of my life is that it's trying to connect to the network. If I leave it connected to my computer for too long, it might just figure out how."

"You said that was impossible." Clarke pointed out.

"I also said this is next level code. Next level, next level."

"It wants to destroy Alie 1. That's why it wants to connect to your network. Alie 1 must be on your network. That's what I was feeling out there. Alie 1 could feel that Alie 2 was nearby."

"Monty, could she be on our network?" Clarke asked him.

"If someone put her there, sure."

"Anyone who's taken that chip could have put her on the network."

"If she is, she's downloading all our data from before and after the bombs. Alie 1 is the thing that blew up earth the first time, it's scary to think about what she would do now knowing we survived. Things weren't exactly good up there, Clarke, remember? If she had a problem with us before, we didn't exactly get any better after."

"If we connect Alie 2 to the network, could she destroy Alie 1?"

"I don't know. Look, I get this stuff, but I'm from farm station and I only had a little training before I got arrested and we got sent down here. None of what I learned prepared me for this."

"I think our best plan is still to retrieve the pack." Lexa intervened.

"Destroy the hard copy. Always a good option. If you do that, we can hack her out of our network. Alie 2 becomes the sole survivor." He disconnected it from his computer and held it up. "Or you can destroy her too. She's not on our network yet. You can take her out now."

Clarke looked at Lexa.

"Not yet." Lexa answered. "We will if we have too, but we might need it."

"Okay. Look, can I take this with me? I might be able to figure something out. I'll bounce her from computer to computer and make sure she stays disconnected."

"Monty, no one can know you have this. Lexa's people still think it's inside her. It's a part of their history and we still don't know what it can really do."

"I got it. You can trust me, Clarke. There's a safe in my room. I'll lock it in there when I'm not using it."

"Lexa?"

"Teik em in."

Monty looked at Clarke.

"She said to take it."

"I'll swing by tomorrow. Tell you if I found anything."

"Thanks, Monty."

He left and closed the door behind him.

"We're leaving tomorrow."

Clarke stood and walked back to the table to clean up the dinner mess.

"I'm staying until this is resolved."

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"Because we were actually just enjoying each other's company without having to talk about all this." Clarke stopped moving. "Are we going to argue about this now?"

"No." Lexa sat on the edge of the bed.

Clarke thought that she looked small sitting there. She was always amazed at how Lexa could be so intimidating one minute; take down Roan and then she's so vulnerable sitting on their bed the next. She was only in a dress that Clarke was surprised she even brought with her.

Clarke walked over and knelt on the ground in front of her.

"I promise I will come back to you."

"I know." She held Clarke's face in her hands. "Now that I know what it's like to be with you, Clarke, it's just hard to be away."

"It's hard for me to be away from you too."

"I'd offer to remain behind, but-"

"I need to take care of this one." Clarke slid her hands onto Lexa's knees. "You need to get back and start work on these plans. Skaikru will want homes by winter."

Lexa smiled at her.

"I'm going to bed. Will you join me?"

"Let me finish cleaning up and I'll be right there." She stood and walked back to their table where the trays of food were mostly in order. She tossed those and then straightened up Lexa's papers and changed her clothes into something she could sleep in. "Do you want to change or-" She asked and turned around to see that Lexa had already fallen asleep. She turned off the lights and climbed into bed next to her. Lexa was on her back so Clarke wrapped her arm around her and rested her head on her shoulder. She felt Lexa lift an arm so she moved so she could slide it underneath her and her other arm went to hold Clarke close.

"This is what I will miss the most." Lexa whispered and fell back asleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15:

"We should say goodbye in here." Lexa was dressed and ready to go. Clarke was dressed and sitting on the bed. They'd been delaying the inevitable for the past few minutes by taking their time packing Lexa's small bag and talking about Clarke's next steps in Arkadia.

"It doesn't always have to be like this when we leave each other." Clarke stood.

"It does when it remains that every time we leave one another, there is something that could possibly cause one or both of us to die."

Clarke walked toward her.

"Of all of the things we've dealt with, this one is the least of my worries."

"Do not doubt that this machine will do what it must to survive."

"I won't. I'll be careful." Clarke put her arms on Lexa's waist.

"Soon, we will no longer have to say goodbye to one another."

"I hope so." Clarke leaned forward and brought her in for a long hug. "Your ambassadors are waiting. You should go." They pulled away and Lexa turned to walk out the door. "Hey, you be careful too."

Lexa nodded and opened the door. Clarke watched her leave and looked around the room; suddenly it felt very empty and she both regretted not asking Lexa to stay and not going with her at the same time.

_____

When Lexa arrived back at Polis, night had fallen. She went into Clarke's old room, which still had some of her belongings in it despite most of them having been relocated to Lexa's chambers. She picked up the remaining items and sat them on the bed as she made her way around the room; ensuring nothing of Clarke's would be left behind. It was then that she found a flat portfolio she recognized on the table. She picked it up and smiled as she opened it and saw Clarke's as yet unfinished drawing of her still inside. She stared at it for a moment and then smiled. Clarke had drawn her without her Commander adornment. She'd drawn Lexa as Lexa.

_____

Clarke had spent the remainder of her day after Lexa's departure working with her mother in medical and trying to spy on Jaha and the others partaking in the City of Light without drawing too much suspicion. It was on her way to dinner that Jaha noticed her.

"Clarke, how have you been?" He asked as she was trying to make her escape.

"Fine." She replied and tried to make her way toward where she could get food and hopefully escape back to her room to meet with Monty who told her he wanted to talk to her.

"Your mother tells me you're an ambassador now."

"Yeah, I'll be returning to Polis soon. I stayed behind to visit with my mom." She lied.

"How are you finding Polis?" He questioned in a serious tone as he followed her through the line.

She thought about how best to answer him. She could give him another one-word response and blow him off, but she realized if Murphy fails, she might need a relationship with Jaha as a back up.

"Polis is starting to feel like home."

"Well, you've spent more time there recently than you have here at Arkadia, but have you thought about staying on here a while longer? I'm sure the Commander and other ambassadors can carry on without you in the meantime."

"Why would I stay?"

"There's a lot going on here, Clarke. We're about to embark on a new age. I think you'd like to be a part of it."

"What makes it a new age?" There was food on her tray now and all she had to do was walk through the door back down the hall to her room.

"The City of Light, Clarke. No pain. No death. You can put everything behind you; everything out of your mind. No loss. No destruction or war. Just happiness."

Clarke watched Murphy nod at her from the hall.

"I should get going."

"We can talk later." He put his hands in front of him in a prayer pose. "I would think you of all people would be interested in what I'm offering, Clarke."

"Why me?" She questioned him.

"Because of all of us here, you've experienced the most loss. You've been responsible for loss."

She stood next to him and kept her eyes on Murphy.

"You don't get to tell me what I'm responsible for, Jaha." She walked out.

"He try to sell you the goods?" Murphy asked.

"He was getting there."

"I did what you said. I've been around. I've ignored him. Gave him a comment."

"And?"  
"And nothing."

They started walking toward Clarke's room.

"He needs to see you alone, Murphy. Looking unhappy. Looking like you'd actually be interested now."

"How long a game you planning to play cause I was pretty much against everything Jaha was doing and I made my opinion known? It might take him a while to actually trust me."

"He wants to trust you. He wants to believe that you'd want to join him. It might take some time, but I don't think it will take as long as you think."

"We might not have that kind of time." It was Monty. He was walked toward Clarke's room just as they'd arrived at the door.

"What did you find out?"

"Inside."

Clarke pushed open the door and the three of them went inside. She sat her tray down; realizing it wasn't likely she'd actually get to eat it.

"What did you find, Monty?"

"Okay, so remember when I said that this thing had intense code?" He sat down and placed Alie 2 next to the computer he'd carried in with him.

"Yeah."

"It's definitely more than that or different. I don't know. She doesn't exactly have an off button. At least not one that I could find and I woke up this morning, went to work and got back to my room and found this." He turned the computer to Clarke and Monty who were sitting at the table.

"Dude, I don't know what that is."

"Neither did I. It took me a couple of hours to figure it out. Well, part of it at least. She got into my system. It's still a closed network so she's not on the Ark network yet, but she's on her way."  
"What's the problem, Monty?"

"Yeah man, Alie wants to destroy her and she wants to destroy Alie, right? She's version 2. Doesn't that mean better and better means she'll win?"

"She's different. Not better. Look, this is all prelim, but she's more…"

"She's more human." Clarke completed.

"I think so, yeah."

"So?" Murphy shrugged.

"She could be less brutal. Is that the right word?" Monty questioned.

"Humans seem pretty brutal to me." Murphy expressed. "I still don't see the problem."

"The best thing we can do is get the hard copy of Alie 1. Shut that down. Then, we don't have to worry about the two of them doing battle and Alie 1 possibly winning."

"What are the consequences of Alie 1 destroying Alie 2?" Clarke asked Monty.

"I don't know. Your guess is as good as mine, but Alie 1 destroyed the earth once."  
"Yeah, but it's not like there are any more mushroom cloud forming bombs out there, right? I mean, she kind of used them all up the first time." Murphy pointed out. "Not like the grounders have been making any new ones."

"No, they haven't, but what if she didn't use all the bombs the first time?" Clarke stood. "She's a computer, right?"

"Yeah." Monty's eyes followed her.

"She would have used only what was necessary to destroy us. What if all the bombs weren't necessary? What if there are some still out there? I mean, even 1 would wipe out our population here at Arkadia, Polis."

"All the grounders too." Monty added.

"We don't know who else might be out there or if anyone else is out there, but everything we know now would be wiped out."

"Why would she do that again?" Murphy spoke up. "If we're all gone, there's no one to do her bidding."

"She's not human, Murphy. She doesn't think like that. She just has to serve her purpose."

"And her purpose was to end humanity."

"She hasn't finished yet." Clarke expressed.

"And she's been waiting for someone to help her this whole time." Monty helped.

"Alie 2 has been inside the Commanders this whole time. It was advising and guiding and… Alie 1 needed Jaha to let her out. She's been basically feeding off of him and everyone else so she could get what she wants."

"And she's been waiting to get near enough to Alie 2 to connect with it and kill it."

"We need to get Alie 2 out of here." Clarke walked to the table and picked up the AI. "Someone should take it back to Polis. I don't think it was close enough then. Lexa didn't start to feel anything until we were half way here."

"Why don't you go? Your girlfriend's there anyway." Murphy took a bite of Clarke's as yet uneaten meal.

"Murphy!"

"What? I meant that in a good way. Just thought you'd like to get back to her."  
"Girlfriend?" Monty lifted an eyebrow.

"Clarke's doing the Commander." Murphy shared and took another bite.

"Get out." She told him.

"You want me to go to Polis?"

"No, I just want you to get out. Keep playing the long game with Jaha for now."

"Why am I even listening to you? I don't need this." He stood.

"Because I got shot trying to get you away from Titus. Because you have no where else to go. Because even though you pretend like you don't care, you do." She paused and opened the door. "Now, get out."

"I'm taking your food." He grabbed at the tray and walked past her.

"Let's go." She motioned for Monty to follow her out.

He closed his computer and stood.

"You and Lexa, huh? There were rumors, but I wasn't sure."

"I'm going to kill Murphy." She hurried down the hall with Monty in tow and made her way outside. Her eyes scanned the crowd until she saw Octavia and Lincoln with Octavia's horse. "Octavia!" She yelled and ran over. Monty did his best to follow.

"What's up?"

"I need you to take this to Polis. Get it to Lexa. Have her hold onto it."

"What? Why?"

"Take Lincoln if you want."  
"You gonna answer me since I don't answer to you?" Octavia tried to get clarification while Clarke was passing her the AI.

"Clarke, what's going on?" Lincoln asked her while standing next to Octavia and continuing to pet her horse.

"I can't explain it right now, but we need to get this thing out of here. I'll radio Lexa and let her know you're coming. Can you go now?"

"And ride through the night?" Octavia checked.

"Take a car, Octavia." Monty nodded toward a truck parked off to the side.

"When's the last time you saw me drive one of those? Not all of us learned how to drive in simulations on the Ark." Octavia replied sarcastically. "Clarke, I'll get it out of here, but what's really going on here?"

"Just the end of the world. Again." Monty wasn't helping.

"I'll get another horse and ride with her."

"I'll drive them." It was Jasper who had walked out and overheard their conversation.

"We'll ride. It's fine." Lincoln told him.

"No, he's right. The faster, the better. Jasper, you good?" Clarke asked him.

"No." He answered honestly. "But I'm working on it." He walked past her. "I've got keys." He turned to Clarke. "Oh, and this." He tossed her a small gray object. Clarke caught it. "Thought maybe you could use it. Let's go." He walked past Octavia and Lincoln.

"If Jasper's going, why do I have too?"

"Because we know Trikru. We know Polis." Lincoln explained to Octavia. "Let's go."

Octavia walked toward the car. Jasper was already inside. She reluctantly climbed in with Lincoln and after a few moments, Clarke watched them pull away.

"Is that what I think it is?" Monty asked.

Clarke stared down at the object and recognized the sacred symbol.

"See what you can make of it. I'm going to radio Lexa. Let her know they're coming."

She passed it to Monty.

"Too bad Raven already took this thing. She's better at this stuff than I am."

"Yeah, too bad." Clarke agreed as they hustled back inside.

Clarke let Monty go at his room and continued onto her own.

"Clarke, I was hoping you hadn't had dinner. I thought we could get some together. Maybe you could help me plan out the classes we're going to offer the healers."

"Mom, I can't right now. I've got to radio Lexa."

Abby matched her stride for stride.

"I think Lexa would understand you being a little late for a good night call, Clarke."

"It's not that kind of call."

"What's going on?"

"I just need to talk to her."

"Is this about Jaha?" Abby asked.

"Is what about Jaha?" It was Jaha's voice from behind them.

"I was just asking Clarke if she had seen you since she'd returned." Abby lied.

"Oh, I see."

"I should go." Clarke used his arrival as an opportunity to make a get-away.

"I'll come by your room later." Abby offered.

"Mom, it's okay. I'll just see you tomorrow." She assured.

"Have a good night, Clarke. I hope to see you tomorrow as well." Jaha bid her farewell.

_____

"Clarke?" Lexa's voice came over the radio after Clarke tried her a couple of times.

"Hi."

"How are you?"

"I sent Octavia with Lincoln to Polis. They're in a car with Jasper. They should be there tonight."

"What's wrong?"

"We needed to get Alie 2 out of here."

"So, this isn't a good night call I take it?"  
"I don't think we'll ever be the people that get good night calls, Lexa."

"Why did you need to get her out of Arkadia?"

"We think Alie 1 is trying to end the world again and she wants to destroy Alie 2 because she would try to stop her." There was static on the other end. "Lexa?" Clarke checked.

"I'm sorry. It's just that not too long ago I thought the thing inside me was the souls of others."

"Are you okay?" Clarke asked her.

"I have to be. I'm Commander."

"Lexa…"

"They will be greeted upon their arrival. I'll have rooms made up for them and they can stay as long as you need them too."

"Just keep Alie 2 locked up somewhere."

"I will keep it guarded."

"We have to be careful with Jaha. There are too many people already on Alie's side. If we just go at him-"

"I understand. It could take time." She sounded disappointed.

"No, that's what I'm trying to tell you. It can't take time. We think Alie 1 is connecting to the Ark's network to try to locate any bombs that might still exist. We think she might be trying to connect with them; to detonate one or more."

"You think she's trying to attack us?"

"We think she's trying to finish the job she started the first time and she's just now getting her chance."

"What can we do? Do you want me to return? Should I send warriors back to Arkadia?"

"No, they can't help us. There's nothing you can do."

"I can… I can just be there." Lexa tried. Clarke stared at the radio as she sat hunched over on the edge of the bed. "You feva ona ai tombom." You're forever in my heart.

"Ai meme we yu." Clarke replied. I miss you.

"Stay safe."

"I'll finish this and come home."

There was static and she knew Lexa was probably smiling at the thought of her calling Polis home.

"Good night, Clarke."

"Good night."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16:

Clarke had been woken up in the middle of the night to Octavia on the radio letting her know they'd arrived. The three of them were taken to their rooms and Lexa had placed Alie 2 in a locked room with guards and she was the only one with the key. She'd fallen back to sleep, but woken up earlier than usual and left her room after getting dressed. Arkadia was relatively quiet as she made her way down the halls toward the room she'd come to think of as the City of Light manifested.

She saw a few people already in the room convening with Alie. Raven was one of them. Clarke stood in the doorway watching with her arms crossed as Raven opened her eyes after a few minutes, stood up and walked with a smile on her face out the other door.

Clarke had a feeling she couldn't explain so she walked around the corner and followed Raven. She made her way toward one of the engineering rooms and went inside. Luckily for Clarke, there was a small window in the door. She tried to keep herself out of sight, but she watched as Raven began moving wires and equipment around. She appeared to be talking to someone while she worked. Clarke guessed she was somehow communicating with the AI inside of her.

Clarke watched a while longer until Raven made her way toward the door and Clarke ducked out of sight. She followed Raven until she saw her heading to breakfast and then she ran to Monty's room. He was just putting on a jacket as he exited.

"Clarke?"

"Come with me."

"We have other engineers; you know? More experienced engineers. We should-"  
"You're the only one I can trust, Monty."

"What do you need? I've barely slept. The code Alie 2 left on my computer is still blowing my mind."

"Follow me."

Clarke made her way back to the room and checked inside before opening the door and ushering Monty in.

"Whoa!" He stared at the mix of cabling and computers. "What happened in here?"

"So, this isn't what it's supposed to look like?" Clarke had guessed correctly.

"Who did this?"

"Raven."

He started looking at one of the computer screens.

"Give me some time in here." He turned back to her.

"She's at breakfast. I'll see what I can do about stalling."

Clarke left Monty in the room and went back to the cafeteria where she saw Raven eating happily and talking to Jaha and a few other people that were no doubt high on Alie.

She met Kane and Abby at a table and pretended to eat while she watched Raven and the others.

"Clarke, have you eaten since you've been at Arkadia?" Abby asked her.

"Yes." Clarke replied distractedly.

"This isn't the best place to talk about this, but has Murphy…" Kane faded purposefully.

"He's doing what he can." Clarke confirmed. "Right now apparently." She watched as Murphy sat at the end of the table. Not close enough to Jaha to make it look suspicious. He sat by himself, pushing food around on his plate while he looked down at it. She watched Jaha look over a few times and saw Raven slide down in her seat and offer Murphy her hand in a shake of solidarity. He continued to stare down at his plate. "He is good." She admitted. "Raven's up to something." She stated quietly while keeping her eye on the girl. She took her time filling in Kane and her mother softly using the sounds of the now busy cafeteria to drown out their conversation. Hoping that it looked like a daughter catching up with her mother and a potential Vice Chancellor talking to the Chancellor. No one else knew she'd turned him down, but she knew there were rumors that he'd put the offer out there.

"Clarke, if you really think we're in that kind of danger-"

"We had no idea." Abby interrupted him.

"We should evacuate Arkadia. Warn Polis."

"She'll just follow us wherever we go. That's the point. She's trying to finish what she started. We need to end it now."

"Then, let's get Raven and-"

"I don't know how connected Alie is to them. Lexa had Alie 2 inside her and she could feel her. She had dreams. It was very real to her. If Alie wants to do something, she's taking her time to plan it right. She'll notice if we pull in all her people or do anything against her."

"We can't just sit here and wait for her to locate a nuclear bomb, Clarke." Abby whispered.

"This really isn't the right place for this conversation." Kane looked around. "We should go to my office."

"That's suspicious." Clarke looked over at Jaha who met her eye. "They can't see us heading off together to talk in private." She looked at her mom and smiled.

"You're good at this." Abby pointed out and smiled awkwardly back.

"Try sitting in Polis having a bunch of ambassadors talk about how horrible your people are. You'll get good at covering up your real emotions too." Clarke turned back to Kane.

"Can you get to Jaha?" She asked.

"I can meet with him if that's what you mean."

"I want to search his room."

"We already did that. The pack wasn't there." Kane shared. "He carried it on him when he first got here, but I haven't seen it in a while."

"What about a tracker?" Abby asked.

"He'd notice or Alie would." Clarke responded.

"I'm not talking about that kind of tracker." She stood. "Kane, stay here. Clarke, you come with me."

Clarke stood and Abby put her arm around her shoulder to complete the perfect mother/daughter image for anyone that might be looking on.

They arrived at medical and Abby ushered Clarke into a private room where they stored medicines. Abby unlocked one of the cabinets and pulled out a bottle.

"We use this to run tests. It's radiated. It allows us to see certain things we may miss otherwise."

"I remember you teaching me this before."

"It's radiated, Clarke. If we can get it into Jaha in a large enough dose, Alie wouldn't be able to tell and we can use a radiation detector to see where he goes."

"What if she can detect radiation? We don't know what she can do."

"We all have radiation from being on the ark. She's already seen it or felt it on him if she can do that. I can ask him to come in to run some tests, dose him and then we can follow him. We'll know where he's spending the majority of his time and see if we can find the pack with Alie inside."

"Will he come willingly?"

"I don't see why he wouldn't. He's been telling everyone how safe this whole thing is and how good it is for everyone. If he's given another chance to convince me, I think he'll take it."

"Do it. I'll go check on Monty."

"Clarke, be careful." Abby grabbed her arm. "We don't know what these people are capable of if they think Alie is in danger and we're the cause."

"You sound like Lexa. I'll be fine."

"Well, I'm glad I'm not the only one that cares about your safety."

"Yeah, you two have something in common at least." Clarke retorted.

"When the world isn't about to end again, I do want to sit down with the both of you. We have some talking to do, the three of us."

"Mom, really?"

"You're in love with the Commander of a coalition we just rejoined, Clarke. I think that's something we should all take time to wrap our heads around."

"Someday, maybe." Clarke backed away from her mother. "But no rush."

_____

"Commander?" Octavia greeted when she walked into Lexa's room.

"Come in, Octavia." Lexa was sitting on the floor in front of her bed with her legs crossed and eyes closed.

"What were you doing?" Octavia asked her.

"Nothing." Lexa shook her head. "What can I do for you?" She stood and clasped her arms behind her back.

"Jasper would like to return to Arkadia, but the guards won't let him go."

"That was for his safety. He's not familiar with Polis and despite my messages of peace, not everyone is-"

"On board?"

"Yes. I will tell the guards to release him and escort him out."

"Thanks." Octavia went to turn to go.

"Will you and Lincoln be joining him?"

"Are we allowed to?" She turned back to Lexa.

"You're not being held here, Octavia. You and Lincoln are free to go."

"I just meant that Clarke sent us here."

Lexa nodded and walked toward her.

"And you think that because she sent you here, you have to stay until she allows you to return?"

"I told you before that I don't really understand who's in charge."  
"And yet you do what is needed for your people when you must despite who gives the order?"

"Yes, it's not about who's telling me what to do or if I'm doing it on my own." She replied.

"Clarke is right to trust you as was Indra. I am happy you have become Trikru, Octavia." Lexa paused. "Clarke is a great leader."

"She is, yeah."

"But she doesn't wish for that to be her permanent role."

"Everyone knows that. She does what she has to do though."

"But she wants a different life."

"Maybe if we can take care of this Alie thing, she can have one."

"That is my hope."

"Good." Octavia replied a little confused as to how she'd gotten into this conversation.

"One day, if Clarke doesn't want to be an ambassador anymore, would you consider the position?"  
Octavia laughed.  
"Me? An ambassador?"  
"Yes."

"I'm not even Skaikru anymore. You said it yourself."

"My hope is that eventually Skaikru and Trikru… there is no difference. Ambassadors will not be bound by clan."

She laughed again.

"That's going to be a while."

"I know. I also know that Clarke will remain an ambassador for as long as we need because despite her protestations-"

"She's actually pretty good at it and would probably die of boredom if she wasn't involved somehow? Yeah, I know that too."

"When the day comes that she decides she wants that peaceful life with no heavy decisions to burden her, I would like to give it to her and I would hope that perhaps you would consider a position of leadership." Lexa smiled a small smile at her.

Octavia still didn't know what to make of this conversation.

"What were you really doing when I walked in?"  
Lexa looked down at the floor and then back up at her.

"This is why I think you'd make a good ambassador, Octavia. I was attempting to convene with the Commanders."

"The Commanders? That thing isn't in you anymore."  
"I know. It was a belief for a long time before it became a machine in my head."

"You were just checking."

"Yes. I wanted to know that they were truly gone and they are."

"That's a good thing, right?"

"I believe so, but it does feel… lonelier."

Octavia looked at Lexa thoughtfully.

"Clarke will be back soon."

"Will you return to Arkadia with your friend?"

"Yeah, we'll go. I told Kane I wanted to start training some of the Skaikru in grounder weaponry, fighting." She noticed Lexa's expression. "Defense only. Besides, it's better if they don't have guns, right?" She noticed Lexa nod again. "They'll run out of bullets eventually and they should know how to defend themselves. If anyone ever comes to attack the coalition, you'd have more members of your army ready to go to battle."

"Let's hope that never happens."

"Commander." Octavia turned to leave.

"Octavia?"

"Yeah?" She turned back.

"You can consider Clarke my equal in all things." She paused. "If you're searching for someone to give orders, that is."

"Better than Pike." Octavia replied sarcastically and exited Lexa's room.

_____

Clarke didn't find Monty in the engineering room so she wandered Arkadia in search of him. Raven was back to the room by the time Clarke made her way back around. She watched her for a few moments before others walked past and she needed to leave before drawing attention to herself.

She walked past the City of Light room and noticed something she wasn't expecting. Monty was on the floor with his legs crossed and his eyes closed. Clarke realized what this meant and looked to see that neither Jaha nor Raven were around amongst the small group of people convening with Alie. She proceeded through the group and knelt down next to him.

"Monty?"

He opened his eyes.

"Clarke, hello."

"What happened?"

"I'm in the City of Light. You should join me. There's no-"

"Pain, I know. Why did you take it?"  
"Raven found me in the engineering room and Alie asked her to make sure I understood their purpose."

"Raven, made you take it?" Clarke realized Raven must have gotten to him while she was in medical with her mom.

"She invited me to join them."

Clarke looked around the room.

"Monty, can you come with me?" Clarke stood. Monty knew too much about their plan. It was unlikely he'd failed to mention it to Raven or even Jaha once she forced him to take the chip.

"Monty, Clarke is our enemy." Alie's figure appeared to Monty and told him. "She wishes to destroy what we're building here."

"Clarke can join us. We can help her see." Monty spoke to Alie while Clarke looked on confused.

Clarke moved backwards quickly and then out of the room. If Monty was on team Alie, that meant their plan was in danger. Luckily, she hadn't been able to talk to him about Abby's plan yet, so there was a chance they could still get the pack and destroy it.

_____

"Murphy!" Clarke beckoned him. He was walking outside.

"What's up?" He turned to her.

"Come with me."

She looked around and considering she couldn't tell just by looking at someone who was on the chip and who wasn't, she pulled him in the direction of the hole in the fence they'd used to get in and out of Arkadia during the blockade.

"Where are we going? I don't think Lexa would like it if she finds out you took me in the woods just to use me for my body, Clarke."

"Shut up!" At least Clarke was sure he hadn't taken the chip now. She moved them so they were behind a grouping of trees and out of sight. "Monty's on the chip."

"What?"

"He said Raven made him take it."

"That doesn't make sense. They're all about people having to be willing zombies. If they wanted to force people, they could have made everyone in Arkadia take it by now. They have the numbers."

"They're getting desperate. When Raven found Monty, she knew something was up. They might be moving up whatever they're working on because of it."

"What do we do? If they're going to start forcing people, no one's safe. They could get to you or me or Kane. They could take over all of Arkadia."

"I know. We've got to move up our plan too."

"What plan? Me pretending to be a loner so Jaha will try to get me to take the chip again? It was a nice idea, Clarke, but it's not exactly fast. Why don't I just tell him I want it now?"

"No, just stay here."

"What? Why?"

"Because they don't know you're out here. They can't get to you."

"Please, like I'd let them force me to take that thing."

"Murphy, you just said that they could force all of us if they tried." She looked back to Arkadia. "Just stay here."  
"Fine. What are you going to do?" He asked.

"I can't tell you. It's better if few people know. Just… if anything happens, tell Lexa…" She faded out and shook her head. "Never mind." She walked back toward Arkadia and re-entered through the hole in the fence.

_____

She walked cautiously, but normally through the halls again. She ended up at Abby's room and opened the unlocked door; waiting for her mom to get back from medical. It killed her to have to wait, but she knew her mom's plan was the best chance they had now and at least if she was out of sight for a while, there was less of a chance of someone trying to force the chip on her or Alie trying to do something else to her.

"Clarke?" Abby entered a couple of hours later to a pacing Clarke Griffin.

"Mom, did you do it?"

Abby closed the door.

"Yeah, we ran the tests. He took it."

"So, we can track him now?"

"You should wait."

"Why?"

"Because following him around the camp-"  
"Won't work." Clarke finished. "Alie will see us. We have to follow the trail after."  
"You have to let him leave the trail first. Look honey, go to your room, lock the door. Stay there tonight."

"Mom, they forced Monty on the chip. They're changing their plans."

"Then, we have to start moving people out of here. It's getting too dangerous."

"We can't. Alie will know something's up." She paused and sat next to her mom at the table. "But we should get Kane out of here."

"That might give her an idea that something's up too."

"Not if we make it seem legitimate. Send Kane to Polis. You should go too."

"What? No."

"Mom, you're technically the Vice Chancellor right now. If something happens to Kane, you're Chancellor again and we can't take the chance that Alie will force both of you on the chip."

"I should be here, Clarke. I'm also the Arkadia doctor."

"There are other doctors, mom."

"What about you?"

"I'll follow the trail and find the pack. I'll get it out of Arkadia and away from Jaha until we can figure out what to do with it."

"When do we leave?" Abby stopped arguing. She knew Clarke was right.

"Tomorrow morning. Right now would be too suspicious. I'll tell Kane on my way back to my room. We'll make it seem like it was the Commander's idea. She called a last minute meeting. We can pretend I went with you. I'll stay out of sight until I find the pack. I'll use the tunnel."

"Honey, be careful. These people are unpredictable."

"I know. I will." Clarke looked at Abby who stared down at her own hands for a moment. "Mom, should we talk about what happened with Pike?"

"It had to be done, Clarke."

"You didn't have to do it. We could have had a trial like we'll do with Bellamy. He's taking the blame for this."

"Don't defend him, Clarke. He helped Pike become Chancellor and he was the one who shot hundreds of grounders all for the sake of vengeance."

"And he should pay for that crime; not someone else's."

"What I did may have been a crime, but it was a necessary one. Bellamy understood that after everything that happened. The sacrifice he's making is helping us close this chapter. He'll be released soon and we can finally move past all this war and blood."

"I'll radio Lexa. She'll need to know what we're doing in case someone asks." Clarke stood. "Be ready to leave in the morning."

She left her mom alone in the room; not really sure if they'd resolved the issue or not, but Abby seemed to be okay with the decision she'd made to end a man's life. It was something Clarke found herself still struggling with from time to time when she thought about the mountain or all the other people she considered herself responsible for. She wondered, as she walked down the hall, if she would ever really be able to move past what she'd done; what she'd seen.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17:

"Octavia, Lincoln and Jasper wish to return. I told them leaving tomorrow would be the best option." Lexa responded into the radio.

"Actually, can you tell them to stay there?" Clarke asked her. "Something's happening here and it's better if they stay there."

"What's going on?" Lexa sounded a little more anxious than before.

"We're making our move tomorrow, but I need Kane and my mom out of here."

"Clarke…"

"They're forcing people to take the chip. Monty is on it. Raven made him take it. They know what we were up to with Alie 2. They know anything Monty knows." She took a breath. "I'm sending Kane and Abby to you tomorrow morning. We'll get out that you called a meeting. Can you do that?"

"Yes, but Clarke… allow me to come to you."

Clarke thought for a moment about how the Commander just asked her to allow her to do something. She recalled her kneeling in front of her again and still couldn't believe that the woman she'd met, seemingly so long ago, was now asking her permission for something.

"It's safer for you there."

"It's safer for you here too, but we are not people who get to choose safety for ourselves, are we?"

"It will be over soon. Just keep them there for me. Keep them safe."

"I will."

"Monty didn't know about another part of our plan. I should know something more tomorrow."

"Should we be talking about this over the radio?"

"We're on a secure channel, but I should let you go just in case. Monty knew we were using the radio. I changed the frequency, but still." She realized. "We should be careful."

"Then, when will I hear from you again?"

"When, it's finally all over."

_____

Clarke did not sleep that night. She was on her back staring at the ceiling. The room was similar to the one she grew up in on the Ark. Their room had been slightly larger since she lived with her parents and this was a unit reserved for either just a single or a couple; at least until population became an issue and people were a little more cramped. That's when the laws about procreation started and eventually the laws regarding floating all adults for any crime and locking up the kids until they turned 18 and could then be floated because that was seen as less barbaric. Clarke grew restless eventually and went over to the table; finding a pencil and a spare piece of paper.

She began sketching what was on her mind without really even thinking through what she was doing and after about an hour, she looked down and realized that she'd drawn Lexa again. This time though, she'd drawn her sleeping next to her. Her face was to the side and she was lying on her stomach. Her hair was brushed out of the way revealing part of her back. Clarke had even drawn the tattoo on her neck. She smiled softly at the image and continued to shade in certain spots before she ran the pencil out of lead. She was mostly satisfied with her work, but she knew no one would ever be able to truly capture the beauty of the woman she'd fallen in love with. She'd left her portfolio at Polis so she had no where to store this one. She walked it back to the bed and placed it against the wall using the bed to keep it mostly standing and she finally fell asleep.

_____

She climbed into the car with Abby and Kane and looked behind her while Jaha, Raven, Monty and others looked on. Jaha even gave a suspicious wave. A few miles outside of Arkadia, the car stopped and Abby and Kane let Clarke out with a quick goodbye and continued to drive on while Clarke turned back to walk the woods and return to Arkadia in secret.

"You really gonna let me camp out here when I can go in and help you?" Murphy joined her near the end of her walk. "It gets kind of cold out here at night, Clarke."

"Murphy, do you really want to help or do you just want a bed to sleep in?" Clarke was irritable from her lack of sleep and constant involvement in resolving problems.

"Hey, look." He grabbed her arm and pulled her back a little toward him. "I know I'm not exactly the hero type. I get it. No one likes me. I'm not a likable guy and that's fine by me because I don't like most people. You included most of the time, but I also don't want the world to blow up again because in case you haven't noticed, Clarke, we're actually on it this time and there's no Ark up in space to save us."

"Fine. We're going into the tunnels."

They made their way back through the fence and covertly found their way to the escape tunnel through another entrance Kane had created and mentioned to her during one of their initial conversations. From there, it was a waiting game. Clarke hated waiting. She knew she needed Jaha to actually go places in order to track him, but sitting in a small tunnel with Murphy because she couldn't risk being seen, was a lot to ask of anyone. She'd setup rations for herself knowing she'd be in the tunnels for hours and now she was sharing them with Murphy.

"You ready?" He questioned. "Cause I don't think I can stay here too much longer."

"Yeah, let's go." Clarke listened to ensure there was no one outside the tunnel that would see them exit before she moved into the hallway and Murphy followed.

_____

It was late evening and after dinner so most of the people were already in their rooms for the night. Clarke had gotten a radiation detector from Abby before they left.

Murphy kept an eye out while she aimed it around the hallway. There were some pops, but Abby had told her specifically what to look for. She also told her that the radiation levels would start to deplete inside Jaha after about 24 hours so they didn't have much time. They were looking for higher spikes near entrances to rooms and they were slowed by passing groups they had to hide from.

The camp was also not exactly small, but Clarke was at least happy that the plan to build houses on grounder land hadn't begun yet because it would have been impossible to track his movements then. They were hours into their search before anything noticeable happened. She'd been avoiding the common areas she knew he would have been and also would never hide the pack. She was growing tired and Murphy was growing irritated. At least he was forced to be quiet due to their need for secrecy.

"I think we've got something." She whispered as they moved toward a room she'd never been in, but that wasn't unusual. Clarke hadn't spent a lot of time here so there were several rooms she'd yet to discover.

"About time." Murphy stood beside her and noticed the spike on the detector.

Clarke opened the door slowly and took a look around. She'd brought a gun and had it tucked between her body and her pants, but was really hoping she wouldn't have to use it.

The room was a network room, which provided another reason why she'd yet to be inside it. There were even more cables than in the small engineering room. A few computers appeared to be all connected to a central station where differently colored cables were plugged into differently colored ports.

"You know what this thing looks like, right?"

"Yeah. It's a hard case. About the size of a backpack." He started moving around the room, which was really about the size of a large closet more than an actual room.

They worked silently with Clarke locking the door behind them to ensure they were secure.

"Anything?"

"Not yet." He continued to move.

Clarke turned on a small flashlight she'd thought to include in her ration kit and angled it at different pieces of the structure at the center of the room.

"I don't see anything that looks like it doesn't belong, but I'm not exactly the best person for this job. My dad taught me some stuff." She shared.

"It's not here." Murphy pointed out. "At least not that I can see. He must have hidden it somewhere else."

Clarke aimed the light and moved around; not ready to give up and she noticed something.

"Hold on." She told him and moved past him. "Help me move this."

There was a shelving unit against the back wall of the room. Murphy and Clarke pushed it to the left just enough to reveal a door behind it.

"That thing's going crazy." Murphy looked at the radiation detector, which was indeed spiking.

"Look." Clarke looked up and noticed a hole in the wall just above and to the right of the door. There were cables bundled together emerging from it. Clarke picked up her flashlight and followed the cables, which went along the ceiling and attached to the center station. "Come on." She turned back around and walked through the door.

"Maybe we should have this thing ready." Murphy went to pull the gun out from behind her back.

"No. Just come on." Clarke put her hand over the gun so he couldn't pull it out and she walked into another small room.

"That's it." Murphy pointed at a small computer looking object that was sitting on a table connected to one cable, which led to other cables and other cables, which led to the other room.

"It's already connected to the Ark network."

"My guess is Monty had something to do with that."

"He's under her influence." Clarke defended.

"So, what do we do now? Just shoot it?" He guessed.

"I wouldn't." Jaha was standing behind them. He held a key in his hand that he then placed back into his pocket. He apparently had the key to the room and Clarke locking the door earlier had done no good.

Clarke and Murphy turned around.

"Clarke, did you really think I wouldn't figure out what you were up too?"

"We were kind of hoping you wouldn't." Murphy replied for her.

"Alie is what we need. She will help us eliminate pain and-"  
"And life, Jaha! She wants to end the world!" Murphy again spoke.

Clarke was staring at Jaha trying to run through her options. They couldn't get past him. He was blocking the only exit.

"Alie wants to end our suffering. We've only known suffering, Murphy." He looked directly at Clarke. "Clarke, I know you know what I'm talking about."

Clarke took a step back.

"I do." She agreed. She couldn't see Murphy's reaction since he was to the side and a step behind her, but she was sure he was confused. "But what she wants to do isn't right."

"You're believing the wrong source, Clarke."

"What's that?"  
"Alie 2, which was inside Lexa."

"And why is she the wrong source?"

"Because she doesn't offer the City of Light. She can't take you to the place where you're truly without pain. She seeks to live with the pain."

"You're crazy, man." Murphy shared.

Clarke took a small step backwards.

"Alie is searching our network now. She will find Alie 2 and destroy her. Then, we will all join her in the City of Light."

"Jaha, she wants to find bombs. She wants to destroy Alie 2 because she doesn't want her to find them. Alie wants to end the world."  
"She doesn't understand what we're trying to build here." Alie shared with Jaha.

"I know." He told her.

"You know?" Clarke asked him.

"Alie is here with us. She wishes for you two to join us so we don't have to take other action."

"Like forcing us to take the chip?" Murphy questioned.

"Like having Kane kill Lexa." Jaha put his hands behind his back.

"What are you talking about?" Clarke asked.

"We tried to get everyone to understand, but when we found out you were acting against us, we had to take action. Monty told us that Kane was working with you. We forced him to convene with Alie before he left and instructed him to act normally."

"Kane's on the chip?" Murphy asked.

"He's with Lexa. He's with my mom."

"He is." Jaha confirmed. "All it takes is Alie telling him to take care of them and he will kill them to end their suffering and find Alie 2."

"What do you want?" Clarke's heart was pounding. The thought that Kane was near Lexa and that Lexa had the only key to the room where Alie 2 was locked away made her want to vomit.

"Just join us in the City of Light." Jaha held up a chip.

"If we do, you won't hurt anyone?" Clarke clarified.

"We'll have no need too."

"Murphy?"

"Okay." He responded.

Clarke moved to take a step toward Jaha and he held out his hand with a chip for her to take. As she moved forward, Murphy, shielded slightly because he was behind her, reached for the gun at her back, pointed at the machine on the small table and before Jaha could react, he shot three bullets into it.

"No!" Jaha yelled and moved toward it. Clarke moved toward him and shoved him backwards. He fell back and ended up in a sitting position on the floor. Clarke watched as his eyes closed. The same rapid eye movement she'd observed in Lexa was happening to him.

"Did it work?" Murphy checked.

"I don't know." Clarke admitted, breathing fast from the action.

Clarke ran out of the room and into the other one. Murphy kept an eye on Jaha while she ripped any cable that had been connected to Alie from the Ark network just in case.

"He's waking up."

She moved back to the other room. Jaha's eyes opened and he began looking around.

"Murphy? He looked at the guy who was still holding the gun.

"Are you you?" Murphy asked him. "Or are you still with her?"

Jaha looked as if he was considering before he slowly moved to stand.

"I'm me." He paused. "I can't feel her anymore."

"Does that mean that she's gone?" Murphy asked.

"Is she out of everyone? Kane?" Clarke questioned.

"I believe so. We were all connected. I don't feel anyone anymore."  
"What happened?" It was Raven. "I was down the hall and-"  
"Alie's been destroyed." Jaha turned to her.

"Thank God!" Raven announced.

"Thank God?" Murphy put the gun in his belt.

Raven leaned against the wall. She felt her thigh and rubbed it up and down.

"Your leg?" Clarke nodded toward her.

"Hurts like hell, but it's better than having that bitch in my head."

"We should go. We need to check on everyone else." Clarke told them.

They made their way out of the room and down the hall. They saw random people that appeared to be confused. Jaha kept rubbing the back of his head in disbelief. They made it to the City of Light room and saw several people sitting on the floor talking about what happened. Monty was one of them. He walked toward Clarke and the others.

"I'm so sorry, Clarke."  
"For what? You didn't take it on your own."

"Yeah Monty, I owe you an apology." Raven admitted and sat on a chair; still rubbing her leg.

"It was like a fog. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I couldn't stop myself. She controlled everything." He shared.

"It wasn't your fault." Clarke put her hand on his shoulder.

"Clarke, can I talk to you?" Jaha asked.

He ushered her out of the room.

"I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say. When I went on the journey to find the City of Light, I thought it was a place of refuge; a place we could call home. I didn't know-"

"I know"

"I'll help in any way I can to repair the damage that I've done."

Monty walked toward them.

"I'm going to look at the network with Raven. See what Alie may have done to it. Check for problems."

"Thank you." Clarke turned back to Jaha as she watched Monty walk off and Raven slowly follow after nodding in her direction. "I should radio Polis. Tell them it's done."

"Clarke, you know what I find interesting." He started before she began walking off. "I went in search of a mythological city for us to call home and you were here working on helping us build one to call our own. Monty was right. It was like a fog, but I remember it all. You are responsible for us surviving the mountain, for the alliance with the grounders and for the future civilization we now look to have in our grasp."

Clarke didn't know what to say to that. She walked in the direction of her room, but took her time. She checked on a few people she'd known had been connected to Alie and all appeared to be normal.

_____

When she got to her room, she entered and grabbed at the radio; excited to tell Lexa it was over.

"Lexa?"

Static.

"Clarke?"

"Mom? Where's Lexa?"

"She's sleeping. It's the middle of the night. We're taking shifts with the radio. What's going on?"  
"Is Kane with you?"

"He's here. Hold on. I'll wake him."

"Okay."

"Clarke?"

"Are you you?" She asked him.

"Yes. Clarke, I'm so sorry. It was like-"  
"A fog, I know. But you're okay?"

"I'm fine. I take it Alie has been destroyed?"

"Murphy shot her. Jaha is back to normal. So is everyone else from what I can tell."

"Good. Clarke, you did great. Thank you." He told her. "We'll head back in the morning. You should get some sleep."

"Yeah."

A few minutes later, Raven and Monty arrived at her door.

"So, you were right. She was looking for more nukes. It was weird. I didn't believe that at all after I took the chip. I knew about it before, but with that thing in me, it convinced me I was crazy."

"Yeah, you are crazy." Raven joked.

Clarke smiled at her.

"It's good to have you back."  
"It's good to be back." Raven agreed. "This whole thing just puts things into perspective, ya know?" She sat. "Is your mom around? I think I owe her about a million apologies."  
"She'll be back tomorrow morning." Clarke shared.

"Do you think she'd still be willing to help me with my leg even though I've been a bitch to her?"  
"I'm sure she will." Clarke confirmed.

"That's enough of that." Raven changed the subject. "Monty and I found a trace. She'd located two places there may still be active nukes. We were lucky."

"Yeah, it seemed like she was minutes away from getting one online."

"Do you guys know where they are?" Clarke asked.

"One's in what used to be Colorado and the other was in what used to be Korea."

"You shooting her took her offline so we don't have to worry about either anymore." Raven pointed out.

"Do you still have Alie 2?" Monty asked.

"She's with Lexa in Polis. Why?"

"I think we can use her to make sure no one can ever set those things off again."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I just need her back here and I can run some sims. With your help, right?" He looked at Raven.

"Count me in." She stood. "I'm exhausted though. She had me working night and day in that room. I need to get some sleep. Can we start this tomorrow?"

"Sure." Monty replied and stood. "I guess getting brain jacked really takes a lot out of a person." He looked at Clarke. "Hey, have you seen Jasper?"

"He's in Polis with my mom and Kane. Octavia and Lincoln are there too. They'll all be back tomorrow."

"Well, crisis averted again thanks to Clarke Griffin. You sure you don't want to be Vice Chancellor? I heard through the Alie connection once Kane had a chip shoved down his throat that you said no."

"I'm sure."

"Good." Raven smiled at her. "You'd be terrible at it obviously." She teased.

"I'll be back tomorrow and we can go over-" Monty began.

"I won't be here." Clarke stood. She grabbed her bag off the floor and handed Monty the radio.

"Polis?" He questioned.

"Yeah." She smiled at him. "I'll be back though."

She walked past both of them and saw Murphy in the hallway.

"Heading out?"

"Thank you, Murphy."

"I wasn't sure what you were trying in there at first, but I figured it out eventually."

"You might have just saved the world." Clarke offered.

"Don't tell anyone. I'd like them to think I don't care enough."

"What are you going to do now?" She asked him.

"I think I'll stick around for a while." He started walking past her. "Jaha has some major apologizing to do." He turned back toward her, but continued walking backwards. "And I really want to see that." He smiled.

Clarke walked outside and found the last truck available at Arkadia. She didn't worry. She knew there'd be some returning tomorrow. She put it in drive and despite her lack of real driving experience, found it relatively easily. She rolled down the window and enjoyed the cool night breeze. She smiled for a moment and drove on toward Polis.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18:

She opened the door slowly and was met with only the light of a couple of flickering candles. It was enough for her to make out the form in the bed. It was enough for her to set down her things, move toward the bed while removing her clothing that she knew had to be dirty after the long day and night she'd had and just as she was about to climb into bed, she noticed the picture she'd drawn of Lexa all those days ago resting on top of the table.

She walked back to her bag and pulled out the new picture she'd drawn and unrolled it. She placed it next to the old picture and knew she'd show it to Lexa tomorrow, but for now, she was content to slide gently into bed knowing that no matter how quiet she was and how slowly she went, the girl would still wake. She lay on her side and watched as Lexa's eyes opened. She'd missed those eyes.

"Clarke?" Her eyes shot open when she realized Clarke was next to her.

"It's done."

"It's done?"

"Alie is dead." Clarke reassured.

"And you're back? It's the middle of the night. You should have-"

"I couldn't wait." Clarke confessed. "We can talk more about it tomorrow. Can we just sleep now?"

"Of course." Lexa smiled at her. She rolled over on her side facing away from Clarke and Clarke took that as her opportunity to slide behind her and wrap her arms around her body. "I love you."

"I love you." She kissed her neck lightly.

_____

"Clarke, are you sure you don't want to come back… just for a bit?" Abby asked her when they were about to say goodbye outside Polis where the cars were parked.

"I'm sure." She turned to look back at Lexa. "This is where I belong now, but I'll visit. I am technically the ambassador."

"Clarke, we can't thank you enough." Kane put his hand out for her to shake. She did. "We'll take Alie 2 back to Monty and Raven."

"What about Bell?" Octavia asked as she loaded some stuff into the car with Lincoln by her side.

"That's up to him." Kane replied. "He'll get out of jail soon, but he's the one that has to live with what he did."  
"Maybe you can talk to him, Clarke." Octavia suggested. "He might listen to you. You were there at Mount Weather when it happened and-"  
"He's got to do this on his own." Clarke interjected. "Trust me. I've been there."

"Hey." Jasper greeted her. "I… uh…"

"Jasper, I am sorry for what happened." She took his hand. "Please know that."

He nodded at her and put his hand on the back of his neck.

"I think I'm gonna take off."

"What do you mean?"

"I feel like I need some time to myself. I'm gonna walk back to Arkadia. Maybe take a detour or two."

"You gonna be okay?" She asked him.  
"Yeah. I need this though." He looked at Abby. "Will you just tell Monty I'll see him soon."

"I can do that." Abby told him.

"Octavia?" Lexa walked up to join the group she'd been standing behind.

"Commander?"

"I look forward to your return to Polis so that we might discuss your plan and the future."

Octavia nodded. She climbed into one of the cars and Lincoln, looking slightly confused, climbed in next to her.

"Well Clarke, I guess we'll see you." Kane reached out for a hug and then walked toward the car with Lincoln and Octavia to drive.

"I'll have the radio on me. If you need anything-"  
"I know." Clarke assured her mom and they embraced. "What about the other car? I assumed Jasper would drive it back for me."

"Just leave it here. Makes it easier for you to come and go." Abby smiled at her. "You two take care of each other."

Neither girl said anything as Abby walked toward the second car and climbed inside. Both cars pulled away leaving a cloud of dust behind them.

"How are you?" Lexa asked her.

Clarke inhaled and exhaled deeply.

"I am happy." She turned to look at Lexa who smiled in return. "Come on."

They walked back toward the building and Lexa's room.

_____

"I got you something." Lexa said once they were safely inside and alone.

"What?"

She walked over to a table and pulled out a small box. She returned to Clarke who was sitting on the side of the bed and placed it in her lap.

"I had it made for you while you were away. I noticed Skaikru wear adornments when they're… together."

Clarke looked up at her and then down at the box before opening it.

"Lexa…"

Lexa sat down next to her.

"I thought it could be the first step to truly join our people. Exchanging customs and traditions is an important part of that. We don't wear rings as Sky People do." She paused and took a breath. "It doesn't mean… I just… It's just something I thought you could wear that came from me; not that we're…"

Clarke looked down at a ring that looked to be made of silver. It was a simple band, but it reminded her of the one her father used to wear.

"I understand." Clarke did understand. She strangely somehow nearly always understood Lexa. Even when she disagreed with her, she understood how or why she did something. Clarke knew Lexa understood that Sky People typically wore rings to indicate that they were married and Clarke knew Lexa wasn't proposing that they do that anytime soon or even ever. She also knew now more than ever that Lexa had been in love with her for a long time. This was her way of showing that. Others might see the ring and think of it as just a ring, but the two of them would know that it meant much more than that. It was a silent symbol that they were together.

"It's made from the bullet." Lexa explained. Clarke looked at her surprised. "Was that wrong? If you don't like it…" Lexa put her hand over the box. Clarke put her hand on top of it to stop her. "You almost died for me, Clarke. You survived because you are strong. We are strong together. There's no greater sign of love than one person risking their life for another. I thought this could be a symbol of that and also of hope that neither of us ever has to do that again for the other."

Clarke took the ring out of the box. She handed it to Lexa.

"Will you put it on me?" Clarke asked. Lexa smiled shyly and slid the ring on her finger before bringing her hand to her lips and kissing the ring. "I have something for you too."

"You do?" Lexa asked, perplexed. Clarke reached over to grab the picture she'd drawn while in Arkadia. She handed it to Lexa who looked down at it. "You drew this?"

"While I was in Arkadia." She looked away because watching Lexa look at her work made her nervous. "I only had a pencil and I really could have-"

"It's remarkable." Lexa whispered out. She looked up to Clarke. She nodded toward the other picture. "Will you finish that one for me too?"

Clarke looked over at it.

"If you want me too."

"And maybe you can draw something other than me sometime." Lexa smiled at her.

"You've been on my mind a lot, I guess." She admitted. "For longer than I care to admit." She smiled at Lexa who smiled shyly back.

"What do you want, Clarke?" She sat the picture down on the table, picked the box up off the bed and sat it down on the table as well. She stood in front of Clarke.

"I'd like to sleep for a while."

"After that?"

"Maybe you and I could…" She pulled Lexa's hips toward her and watched the girl in front of her smile wider and let out a light laugh.

"After that?"

"I don't know." Clarke replied and rested her head against Lexa's stomach while Lexa's hands went to her hair and then her shoulders that she rubbed.

"Can I tell you what I want?"

"Of course." Clarke confirmed. Lexa never shared what she wanted for herself. Her focus was always on everyone else and while that was an admirable quality and one they both seemed to find attractive in the other, Clarke was glad she was about to hear Lexa express her wants for herself.

Lexa lifted Clarke's chin so their eyes could meet.

"Complete honesty." She paused and took a breath. "I believe those rings your people exchange are typically done for a certain occasion." She watched as Clarke gulped. Earlier, she'd thought she understood that Lexa wasn't proposing anything. "Perhaps one day, we will share that occasion." Lexa shared and Clarke realized that one day would be in the far off future. Lexa wasn't suggesting they take that step anytime soon. Clarke should have trusted her initial feeling after all. She did know Lexa. She knew her better than anyone; probably better than anyone ever had or ever would. "It will be a true bonding of our people, but more importantly, it will be about you and I." Lexa's eyes began to well up and Clarke couldn't believe she'd said that they were more important than their people. "Clarke Griffin, you are the love of my life and while my beliefs have changed recently about several things, I do still believe that death is not the end." She paused again and a tear ran down her cheek. It was the same cheek that Clarke had noticed, after their kiss in this room not so long ago, had a similar tear running down it. It was as if Lexa never believed Clarke would kiss her after all that had happened and she couldn't hold back the emotion when it actually happened. "I wish to live my life as if it were though; as if death is the end. I want us to live; not merely survive and later in our lives when death does come to greet us, I want my eternity to be with you."

Clarke pulled her closer by the hips and rested her head back against her stomach because she was having a hard time looking at her while she was saying these words to her. She'd never thought they'd have the chance to talk like this with one another. She'd never given into the idea of being able to tell Lexa that she was her soul mate because that was something people like Clarke and Lexa don't get to do; don't get to have. Clarke had never considered herself someone that even believed in that concept. Growing up on the Ark made that nearly impossible. Sure, people loved each other. Her parents managed to find that, but Clarke always felt that people were somehow just finding people they could tolerate. Maybe they'd be lucky enough to find love, but the idea of soul mates seemed crazy to her. When they crashed into the earth, she knew that for certain. When she walked into a tent and saw Lexa for the first time, she still knew that. However, over time, her opinion began to change. She first had to admit that she could even love again, then she had to get over the fact that having anything with Lexa would challenging because she was the Commander and Clarke was somehow responsible for her people. It had been the day she almost left for Arkadia; the day she thought she'd have to say goodbye for a long time. As she walked into Lexa's room after having Octavia give her a deadline to say her goodbyes, her eyes flitted around the room looking for Lexa. There was a moment when she thought she wasn't there. She thought she'd missed her chance and that thought scared her more than any kill order could.

When she spotted her emerging looking even more vulnerable than she had the night she'd knelt before her, she breathed a large sigh of relief and realized in that moment that she'd have to say goodbye to the woman she loved. She'd have to say goodbye to her soul mate. Lexa knew she'd leave to go back to Arkadia without Clarke having to say a word. What she didn't know though was how much the thought of saying goodbye to Lexa hurt her. When Clarke felt her wrist on her arm as they shared the common embrace, electricity shot through her entire body. Everything was on fire and all she wanted was to finally show Lexa what she'd been feeling. She wanted to give her at least the knowledge that Clarke returned her feelings; that it wasn't one-sided. Clarke was ready. They just couldn't have it yet.

"Lexa, I-"

"I think you make an excellent ambassador to your people, but when you are ready to give it up, I will support you."

"No more lectures about how I am a leader to my people?" She smirked at her to diffuse the seriousness of this conversation.

"No more lectures. I want you to draw or help the healers as you spoke about before or find another calling entirely."

"What about you?"

"What do you mean?"  
"You've talked about me and you've talked about us, but what about you, Lexa?" She paused. "How do you feel now that you no longer have the other Commanders in your head?"

"I am not worried. I attempted to convene with them before and they weren't there. For a moment, I was scared. I felt alone. It was Octavia that actually reminded me why I felt alone and it had nothing to do with the Commanders no longer being inside my head. It was because I've never felt more whole then when you are with me, Clarke." She told her and lightly pushed at Clarke's shoulders to move her back on the bed. "I no longer require their guidance. I am the Commander my people need. I know that now. You've shown me that."

"Yes, you are." Clarke agreed and pulled her on top of her. She shifted her hair behind her.

"I think that day has come, Clarke." Lexa suggested.

"What day?" She asked her.

"The day that you and I owe nothing more to our people." Lexa expressed.

"At least for now." Clarke agreed and disagreed at the same time.

"Yes, Clarke. At least for now." Lexa leaned down and kissed her. After several moments, they separated and Lexa's forehead was pressed to Clarke's.

"You know; you say my name a lot." Clarke pointed out with a smile.

"You've told me that before." Lexa smiled back and reconnected their lips.

 


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19: Originally an Epilogue...

They named it Polaris after the ship that had been blown out of the sky and the people that had been killed on board. They named it Polaris because Becca, the first Commander, had come from Polaris and despite all the bad she'd done by creating Alie, she also managed to do some good by creating Alie 2, bringing her down in the escape pod and recreating the world she'd helped destroy. They named it Polaris because this new city, this thriving metropolis with a combination of farms and schools and 2 working hospitals was the perfect name for a place for citizens of all clans; those from the ground and those from the sky. Polaris was the name of the ship and Polis was the name of the city they'd first created.

She'd just finished the last coat of paint on the tunnel walls. It had taken her months to actually complete her work. The lighting in the room left a lot to be desired, but she'd opted to leave it natural instead of bringing in lights that would undoubtedly make it easier for her. It had been 4 years since she'd seen these walls for the first time and finally came to understand how her people came from the same place as the people that paid homage to this room.

She felt her enter before she even heard her. She always did these days. After years of being together, it was a skill they'd both picked up. She turned her head slightly to look back as the girl dressed in all black walked up beside her.

"Beautiful." Lexa shared.

"It's not finished." Clarke pointed out. "It's still drying and I might add another layer over there if-" She motioned with her hand.

"I wasn't talking about the painting. Although, that is also beautiful." Lexa turned to her and gave her a shy smile. It never ceased to amaze Clarke that her girlfriend of four years still blushed when she gave her compliments or found herself in a particularly romantic mood. "Will it be ready in time for the celebration?" She changed the subject quickly.

"Yes." Clarke assured and heard men enter the room carrying items that would reside in this space from now on. The items were pieces of importance from each clan and they would be placed around the room and the room itself, though small, would act as a sort of museum for the new civilization that had been started the moment peace was achieved.

"Clarke, this was a good idea. People will come here. They will look at our new history on these walls and they will continue to desire the peace we've achieved." She paused and looked at Clarke. "What you did here is important." She took Clarke's hand.

Clarke was still getting used to that. People spread rumors of their relationship and most people from Old Arkadia knew they were true, but they were still keeping it mostly a secret. It was only recently that Lexa confirmed it to the ambassadors and therefore all their people. It was smart of Lexa to wait because it took almost that long for all the ambassadors to get fully on board with peace and with Clarke having such an important role. Despite all the good they'd done individually and together, people still doubted them. People still wished for the old ways. Some of them probably still did, but they kept it to themselves these days.

"I should probably get going. My mom's expecting me." Clarke started to pull away, but Lexa kept hold of her hand and they walked out together instead.

"How are you feeling about all this?" Lexa asked her as they joined the busy marketplace. People bowed their heads as they passed. Clarke remembered the first time she'd noticed someone doing that to her when she was alone. It had been about two years prior and she was walking the streets in an effort to find something to sketch when a member of Azgeda nodded at her respectfully. King Roan had turned out to be one of the most important supporters of the peace; even giving up the title of King to support Lexa as the Supreme Commander of the coalition. He remained on as a trusted general and often worked with Indra on continuing to train those that remain as warriors in case there is ever an external threat to their new world.

"Weddings?" Clarke asked her.

"Your mother's wedding." Lexa replied.

"Commanders." Someone said at them and nodded.

Clarke wasn't a Commander. She wasn't even an ambassador anymore, but people still sometimes called her Commander when she was with Lexa. That was mainly because Lexa had insisted she be treated as her equal in all things and after several years, people finally started to listen.

"I'm happy for her. Kane makes her happy." She took a deep breath. "It's strange thinking back to the Ark now. It was so long ago, but things were just so different. In a way, Kane was responsible for my father's death, but I can't fault him for it now. Things were just-"  
"Different?" Lexa completed and smiled. She'd long ago done away with the war paint of their battled past, but still wore the circular adornment when she was dressed in full Commander gear. That gear no longer required that she wear a sword since there hadn't been a battle in several years, but she still wore one because as much as she embraced the new ways, she'd always be tied to the ways of old and desired to remember them always to ensure they would never be repeated.

"It's just a small ceremony and I'll be back in a few hours, but are you sure you can't go?" Clarke asked her as they neared their destination.

"If I go, I have to bring…"

"The whole entourage, I know."

"Besides, I have a meeting with Octavia. She's insisting that we give her people to help a weapons factory."

Clarke stopped when she reached her horse. Lexa had seen to it that it had been ready for her.

"That's the last thing we need. We need to focus our efforts on livestock. We're finally getting them to…" Clarke stopped herself. Lexa smirked at her.

"Go on." She encouraged.

Clarke just shook her head and climbed on the horse.

"You're the one that told her she'd make a good ambassador someday." Clarke pointed out.

"And I was right." Lexa smiled up at her and walked toward her so she could just touch Clarke's leg with her hand. "She just needs to soften her approach."

Clarke laughed at that.

"Things have definitely changed. Lexa, Commander of the coalition, saying someone else needs to soften their approach."

"Give Abby and Marcus my congratulations." Lexa ignored Clarke's comment. "And I will see you later tonight."

_____

Clarke rode off toward the house Marcus and Abby had built the year before. It was one of the last homes built. They'd insisted everyone else get a home before they did. Marcus had remained on as Chancellor while Abby continued her work as doctor, but had also helped the healers learn their ways while the healers taught them of natural remedies and solutions never available to the doctors in space.

Jaha had actually turned into a good Vice Chancellor. Despite the problems he'd dealt the people of Arkadia, people were understanding once he explained that he sought the City of Light in hopes that it would provide what Polaris now does; a sanctuary of peace.

Clarke arrived at her first destination before leaving Polis, the capitol of Polaris.

"Indra?" She climbed down from her horse and met Indra at the entrance of her home.

"Clarke." She greeted.

"Do you have it?" Clarke checked.

"Yes, the blacksmith finished it last night." She handed Clarke a small pouch.

"Thank you."

"I did it for the Commander." She replied.

"I know." Clarke nodded.

"But also for you, Klark kom Skaikru." She let out a small smile.

Clarke hadn't heard the name in a while. She held out her hand and Indra shook it in the old custom.

"I'll see you at the celebration."

"Tell your mother that her hospital is nearing completion. We should have it completed by the next full moon."

"I'll tell her." Clarke climbed back on her horse.

Indra had taken control of the expansion process for Lexa. She'd seen crews engaged in planning and building and was finishing up the newest hospital that would act as a training hospital for new doctors as well. She'd seemed happier since taking on this work. She'd seen to it that their important traditions and methods remained, while they adopted those from the Sky People to advance their skills.

Clarke arrived at the house and was immediately met by Raven.

"She's inside. She's freaking out." Raven supplied and helped tie up Clarke's horse. "Something about how she's too old for this."

"That's ridiculous."

"I tried to tell her that too, but she'll only listen to you."

They walked inside the small home and found Abby standing in front of a window facing their modest backyard. There were already people sitting in chairs awaiting her arrival. Kane was talking to Jaha who in his capacity as Vice Chancellor would preside over the ceremony.

"Clarke!" Abby turned to her and embraced her in a tight hug. "I'm glad you're here. Listen, I was thinking that maybe this isn't necessary. Marcus and I have been together a while now and we live together and there's not really a reason to-"  
"You're getting married, mom." Clarke pulled back.

"It's just so formal. We're already basically married anyway. What's the point of…" She took a deep breath. "Your father and I were so young."

"He would want this for you." Clarke explained and took her hands. "He would want you to be happy. I know you want this. You're just scared."

"I'm kinda with Abby on this one. What's the point of making it all legal like this?" Raven asked. "The point…" Clarke glared at her and then looked back at her mom lovingly. "Is that when you love someone and you overcome more than you ever thought possible to come out of all that not only intact, but thriving… it's more than just legal. It's important. It's celebrating the fact that love can bring you strength. It can make the impossible seem possible."

Raven and Abby looked at each other. Abby returned her eyes to Clarke and smiled.

"Alright well, let's do this. I'm not getting any younger."

_____

Clarke watched Kane hold Abby's hands and smile wide as she said her vows. When a tear streamed down her face, he brushed it away with his thumb; never letting go of his smile. It was a small ceremony. Clarke, Raven, Jasper, Monty, a few doctors and others from Old Arkadia and other clans sat in seats. It was also a short ceremony and then there was a toast and a small party to celebrate. Abby looked happy. Clarke smiled as Raven danced jokingly with Monty. Jasper had been given land of his own and Monty taught him how to farm it. He'd even found a girlfriend from Ice Nation and he'd brought her to the wedding. Monty remained in Old Arkadia. He was a scavenger of sorts. He pulled parts from the old ship and repurposed them. He'd become a really good engineer and even found a way to disarm the nukes without having to leave his computer to keep anyone from ever using them.

Raven had become head engineer. She met with Lexa and the ambassadors regularly to help plan for how engineering could benefit the population. She'd worked closely with Abby to develop a medical implant that Abby later placed against her spine in a somewhat risky surgery. It helped her walk with no pain. Some of the tech they'd developed within the past few years actually came from Alie 2. The device itself had been downloaded onto a server so it was no longer needed, but Alie 2 was very much still alive. She was managed by Raven and Monty along with a crew and Clarke had been assured that the disaster that was Alie 1 wouldn't repeat itself with Alie 2. She was the upgrade that seemed to understand humanity. She was also closely monitored just in case. Simulations were run weekly to track her decisions and determine if any of them would be dangerous to the population.

Murphy had even made himself useful. He started working with engineers to build small boats and ships about a year after the peace broke out. He went on fishing runs and helped trek supplies back and forth. He seemed to enjoy life on the water as well as the fact that he ran his own ship and was therefore his own boss. Clarke hadn't seen him in a while, but she heard from others that he was successful and was apparently also a little less of a pain in the ass.

"Have you seen Bellamy recently?" Monty asked Raven out of the blue.

"He's around. I saw him at the hospital last week when I went in for a follow-up."

"What happened?" Clarke asked her. She realized she'd failed to ask about Bellamy herself.

"He'd gotten attacked. Animal, I guess. He had some scratches. One of the docs patched him up. I saw Octavia there. She tried to hug him, but he pulled away."

"Do you think he's ever going to come back?" Monty took a drink from his cup and looked over at Clarke.

"I doubt it. Guy still seems pretty messed up to me. He comes and goes, but I don't think he'll ever rejoin us if that's what you mean." Raven replied. "Maybe he's better out there on his own. He doesn't have to look at the families of the people he killed."

Clarke nodded in agreement. Bellamy had been released from solitary and pardoned for his role in the Pike incident. He left immediately after that. He grabbed a few supplies and took off from Arkadia. Clarke couldn't exactly fault him for that. She'd done it herself. She had no intention of returning either. She was found by Roan and taken to Lexa and as she thought back to that, she smiled. It had been the best thing that ever happened to her.

Bellamy, it seemed, still needed time. She hadn't spoken to him since it happened. She'd only seen him once. He'd been in Polis to get supplies. Octavia had noticed him and Clarke could see them arguing although she couldn't make it out and she decided not to approach it. It seemed like something they needed to work out together. When she saw Octavia land a punch square on his jaw though, she rushed to intervene. Bellamy just shook it off and walked out of the city. Octavia said she'd tried to talk some sense into him and it didn't work so she tried to beat some sense into him. Lincoln helped pull her back and then followed off to check on Bellamy. He'd done that from time to time mainly for Octavia who he knew still worried about her brother.

Lincoln had actually taken on the role of judge in disputes. He led a tribunal of judges actually. They saw to the day to day issues of the city, freeing up the other leaders to focus on the larger issues. He seemed to really take to the position and when Octavia became ambassador and put down her sword despite her protestations, he asked her to move with him to a new house. They would never marry according to Octavia. Clarke guessed Lincoln had asked her at least once, but she said no. Octavia wasn't the marrying kind.

Clarke watched her friends and family celebrate and as the sun set, it was time for her to return to Polis. She hugged everyone and gave final congratulations to her mom and Kane. She'd see them all soon for the annual celebration of peace in Polis. She climbed on her horse and rode toward the place that had been her home for four years now.

_____

When she arrived, she went straight to their room. They'd shared it all this time. Clarke never had a need for her own room. She cleaned herself up and finished her preparations. She knew Lexa would be with Octavia for a while. That girl was even more stubborn than both of them combined sometimes. Guards came in and lit the candles that they still used for light despite the fact that electricity was something that at least some of Polis had now. When they left, she was again alone. She was sitting on the edge of their bed and she was nervous. As often as she was able to read Lexa's mind, every now and then, she found herself unable too. The girl could surprise her sometimes and Clarke smiled at the thought.

The last time Lexa had been surprising was when she told Clarke they were going to visit one of the ambassadors for a meeting. Clarke was still an ambassador at this time and was going in a professional capacity because it was said the other ambassador respected her.

_____

They ended up instead at a place Clarke never expected she'd be. Lexa had taken her to Mount Weather. They arrived alone; leaving the guards a few miles behind them. Clarke wasn't sure what was happening, but Lexa took her hand and they walked toward the place together.

"Lexa…" Clarke had started. Her heart rate was increasing.

"This was the spot." Lexa turned to stand in front of her.

"Why are we here? I don't want to be here." Clarke tried to pull her hand away, but Lexa held onto it.

"Because this is where I knew, Clarke."

"Knew what?" Clarke asked her.

"When I made that deal to save my people, I knew I cared about you, but I had a decision to make and I had to hurt you."

"I remember." Clarke was looking anywhere but Lexa's face.

"When I told you about the deal, we were standing right here and when I saw the look on your face, I had to hold back my tears because it was then that I admitted to myself I loved you. I'd known for a while, but I kept pushing it out of my mind. In this moment though, I couldn't."

Clarke finally met her eye. Her own eyes reading surprise.

"Then?"  
Lexa nodded.

"I don't want to dwell on the past. I just wanted you to know."

"That's why you brought me here?"  
"No." Lexa smiled. "Come with me please."

"I don't want to go in there."

"Trust me?" Lexa asked her.

It was in this spot that Clarke had put her trust in Lexa and was let down. She knew this time though that she had nothing to worry about. She took Lexa's hand and they walked through the entrance.

"Lexa, this place was destroyed. Why are we here?"  
"After you left, we divided up what was in the mountain. We took turns raiding the supplies. I came here once." She paused. They turned and turned and walked down hallways that had black on the walls from the blast. "Before we found you and you came to Polis, I came here." She motioned for Clarke to enter a room ahead of her. "Go on."

Clarke remembered this space. It was the old cafeteria. She remembered watching everyone eat there the first time she arrived at the mountain. While it still looked in disarray, there was something different about it.

"What is this?" She questioned and turned back to look at Lexa.

"You might call it fate." Lexa took steps to stand next to her. "When I came here, I found these. I walked for hours looking at everything they had down there and I had my guards bring these with us to Polis. I'd forgotten all about them until you told me you wanted to be an artist and then with everything that happened, I forgot them again until you said you wanted to repaint our now joint history on a wall. I thought perhaps we could display them here and as people begin to think less and less of this place as a place of death, we can turn it into a place of life; a place of art. Maybe even your art can be displayed as in the art museums of old you've told me about."

Clark looked at two rows of paintings displayed on makeshift easels. They were from the storage room of Mount Weather. Lexa had saved some of them from the bombs that would later destroy the mountain.

"Lexa, this is amazing." She started to walk down the rows. "I can't believe you did this."

"Clarke?" She questioned from her spot.

"Yeah?" Clarke was staring at a Van Gogh and only half paying attention.

"Octavia is ready."

Clarke turned to her.

"For what?"

"To take over as ambassador if that is still your wish."

Clarke walked toward her.

"You spoke to her?"  
"You have prepared her well, Clarke and despite her earlier reservations, she believes she is ready to be a leader to our people." She clasped her hands behind her back. Clarke smiled at her. "What?" Lexa asked about the smile.

"Nothing. You just stand like that sometimes." She motioned with her hand. "It's cute."

Lexa immediately changed her posture causing Clarke to laugh and it echoed in the nearly empty room.

"You know I am happy with you remaining ambassador if you have changed your mind."

Clarke looked around the room.

"I haven't." She admitted. "Octavia is ready. You're right." She agreed. "I just don't know what I'm going to do. I guess help my mom with the healers."

"You can return to your art."

"That's not a job, Lexa."

"It will take up enough of your time when you combine it with something else."

"What are you talking about?" Clarke asked her.

"I have something else I'd like to run by you."

"Okay." Clarke replied with hesitation.

"I have another job for you."

"What?" Clarke's mind was racing. She had no idea what job Lexa would want her for other than ambassador.

"Flamekeeper."

_____

Clarke started painting the mural of their history shortly after. It had taken some convincing, but Lexa believed Clarke was the perfect person to not only teach their separate histories along with their new joint history, but also to document it in art and word for future generations.

Clarke sat on the edge of the bed awaiting Lexa's arrival. She heard the doors open and watched as a clearly frustrated Commander walked into the room.

"Octavia?" Clarke questioned with worried eyes.

"Please tell me you'll reconsider and go back to being an ambassador." Lexa walked right past her and into their bathroom while Clarke just shook her head sideways at her. "It took me two hours to get her to understand that we have plenty of weapons and no foes to use them on. Then, she showed me a drawing of the building plans that apparently you helped her with." Her head peaked out of the bathroom.

"I draw plans for the city all the time. She asked me to draw something for her. She didn't tell me what it was." Clarke defended. "She just asked me to spec it out for her."

She disappeared back into the bathroom and Clarke heard her sigh.

"Have you eaten?" She asked when she emerged; her clothes changed for the night.

"Yeah, I ate at the-"  
"Wedding!" Lexa realized. "I am so sorry. I forgot to ask. How was it?" She approached Clarke on the bed and rested her hands on her shoulders.

"It was great. They seem happy." Clarke gulped. "Can you sit? I want to talk to you about something." She asked her and patted the spot on the bed next to her.

"What's wrong?" Lexa checked and sat in the spot while Clarke stood and walked over to a table that had been built for them by one of the ambassadors when Lexa confirmed their relationship. She picked up a piece of large parchment and turned back to face Lexa.

"Nothing's wrong." She held up the paper and watched as Lexa took it in.

"You drew me again?" She smiled and took the picture from Clarke.

"I drew us." Clarke pointed out and sat next to her again. She took a deep breath as she watched Lexa's smile grow. "It's really hard to draw yourself." Clarke suddenly got shy and felt her cheeks heat up and knew they'd turned a shade of red.

She'd drawn them facing each other with Lexa's hand against her cheek and both of them with small smiles on their faces.

"We should hang this up." She remarked and then looked closer at the picture. "Clarke, what's that?" She questioned and turned to face Clarke.

"That is this." She took another deep breath and held up the small pouch Indra had given her earlier. She took the picture from Lexa and passed her the pouch. Lexa looked at her and then down at it before looking inside. She pulled out a silver ring. It was the ring on her finger in the picture Clarke had drawn. Clarke knew she'd be able to count on Lexa's skills of observation to notice what she'd drawn in preparation for this night.

"It's a ring." She held it up to look closer. "With our most sacred symbol."

"I had it made for you. She took it from Lexa's hand and saw the infinity symbol that the blacksmith had so delicately etched in for her. "I've been wearing the one you gave me for a while now. I thought it was time you had one of your own." She slid it on Lexa's finger and watched as the girl appeared to be enamored by the whole thing. "I had it made from Alie 2."

Lexa looked up at that.

"What?"

"We didn't need the device anymore so I had it repurposed." She lifted Lexa's hand and kissed it. "This way the spirit of the Commanders is always with you."

"Clarke…" Her hand went to Clarke's cheek as it usually did.

"Marry me?" She hadn't planned to blurt it out like that. She planned a speech. She had her mom actually help her with how to word it. Kane offered his advice too since he'd recently proposed himself, but looking into Lexa's bright eyes with the flickering light of the candles bouncing in them, Clarke lost all those words.

"Marry you?" Lexa checked. Her nervousness reflecting in her tone.

"Ai hod yu in, Lexa kom Trikru. Yumi na…" I love you, Lexa from Trikru. Will you… She shook her head. "I'm sorry. I don't know the word for marry." Clarke admitted slightly embarrassed that this was the one word she'd somehow never learned in Lexa's native tongue.

"Yes."

Clarke's eyes grew 3 sizes as she stared at her suddenly forgetting her embarrassment.

"Yes?"

Lexa's smile reminded Clarke of the first real smile she'd ever seen from her. They were lying in this same bed about to say goodbye.

"Yes, Clarke. I will marry you."

Clarke's smile was as large as Lexa's, but she had to get rid of it in order to kiss her, which was the more pressing need at the moment. She felt Lexa's tongue meet her own and as Lexa began to lean forward forcing Clarke to lie back on the bed, she wrapped her arms around the girl on top of her and shifted her hair behind her so she could see her face as they pulled apart from her kiss.

"I can't believe you said yes." Clarke commented as Lexa's lips attached themselves to her neck.

"You thought I would say no?" She questioned.

"I thought you would want to discuss it or talk about how it would effect everyone or-"

Lexa leaned back up and put her finger over Clarke's lips.  
"I wish to marry you because I love you, Clarke. Nothing else matters." She leaned in and placed a gentle peck to Clarke's lips as she felt Clarke's hands go under her shirt. She lifted herself back up. "We should do it at the celebration."

Clarke's eyes got big again.

"Get married?" She asked for clarification.

"Yes."

"It's in 2 days, Lexa."

"Yes." Lexa smirked. "What better way to celebrate our continued unification than with our union?"

"I assumed you'd want to wait."

"Clarke…" She pressed her forehead to the blonde's. "I've waited for 4 years. Some might even say I've waited longer than that." She answered referring back to the time she'd patiently waited for Clarke after she'd first arrived at Polis.

"Okay." Clarke agreed. Lexa leaned in for another kiss. "You realize everyone will be there?"

"Yes."  
"Are you ever going to say anything other than yes again?" Clarke rolled her eyes at her.

"Yes." She joked.

Clarke rolled them over so she could be on top of her while she took in Lexa's laughter. She watched as the girl looked at the new ring once more.

"We'll have to take these off before the ceremony so we can put them back on again." Clarke informed about their rings.

"Why?" Lexa glared at her. Clarke found it cute, but didn't actually say that out loud.

"Because that's how it's done."

Lexa lifted her lips in a smile.

"I thought we stopped letting how things are done determine how we do things a long time ago." Lexa looked at the ring again. "I'm never taking this off, Clarke."

Clarke leaned down and captured her lips.

_____

Later that night, they laid side by side. Lexa's eyes were closed, but Clarke remained awake. She brushed Lexa's long hair out of her eyes and watched her breathe. That day, after their first time, as she slid her fingers along Lexa's back, it never entered her mind that this would be their outcome; that they would be married. She never allowed herself to think about what could have been, but now as she watched the only person she'd ever really loved sleep restfully after everything she'd been through, she thought of only that; of only their shared happiness. She thought of Lexa's smile. It was the best thing she'd ever seen and she was lucky enough to see it more than anyone else. The woman in front of her was remarkable and Clarke knew how lucky she was to have her, but she also knew that Lexa felt just as lucky to have found Clarke in all this.

"You should sleep." Lexa's eyes opened.

"I'd rather watch you." Clarke replied and kissed her forehead.

Lexa put her hand on Clarke's cheek.

"Watch me? I'm not going anywhere." Lexa's lips gently grazed Clarke's and her eyes closed again.

Clarke watched for another few moments before she closed her eyes as well. Lexa was right. She wasn't going anywhere. They'd have a lifetime together.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I wasn't done with this story after all apparently. I've changed the title of the Epilogue I'd originally written to Chapter 19. This is Chapter 20 and there will be more after this. Full disclosure: I still have not watch 3x08 or 3x09, but I did read a recap for 3x09. You'll see why I mention that here later. Thank you for all the kind words about the story as I originally conceived it. I hope you enjoy the additions.

Chapter 20:

"Are you sure you wanna do this, Clarke?" Raven asked her.

"Weren't you just helping me convince my mom to do this just the other day?" Clarke replied and took a drink.

They were sitting alone in Raven's small house that looked more like a mechanic's garage most of the time.

"I didn't mean get married." She answered. "I meant get married in front of the entire population."

"She's the Commander."

"So?"

"It's just that if we're going to do it, we should probably do it in front of everyone. She's right. It helps promote unification."

"Who cares?" Octavia asked when she entered. "Sorry, I'm late." She sat down next to Raven at the small table.

"It's already strange to me that I'm even getting married and it's tomorrow."

"You proposed to her, didn't you?" Raven asked.

"Yes and it's what I want. It's what I've wanted for four years now. She's the one."

"So, what's the problem?" Octavia asked and stole a drink from Clarke's cup.

"There is no problem." Clarke retorted.

"You don't want it in public, do you?" Octavia figured out and leaned in. "I mean you were thinking it would just be a few people or something, weren't you?"

"Like your mom's." Raven added.

"I want to marry Lexa. At the end of the day, that's all that matters. I thought we'd have time to plan it, but we've both waited so long. She waited so long for me." Clarke took her cup back from Octavia, but didn't drink from it.

"What do you mean? You guys got together pretty much right when you got to Polis." Raven professed.

"That's not the whole story." Clarke expressed and ran her finger along the rim of the cup.

"Fill us in." Raven smirked and leaned in to match Octavia's posture.

Clarke smiled at both of them.

"She kissed me before."

"Before when?" Octavia questioned.

"Before I was ready." Clarke shared. "It was right before the mountain. Right after Finn."

Raven lowered her eyes for a moment before returning them to Clarke, but the smirk was gone.

"She did?" Octavia checked. "How was it?"

Clarke shook her head at her.

"Strange at first. I wasn't expecting it at all. She told me she cared about me before, but I wasn't prepared for a kiss."

"And?" Octavia was still looking for an answer.

"And once I got over the initial shock…" She smiled. "It was good. The timing was off, but it was really good." She admitted with a shy smile.

A silence passed over the three of them.

"Do you guys ever think back to the ark?" Raven asked. "I mean, it just still hits me sometimes that we used to live in space; that I barely knew Clarke and obviously never knew you." She nodded toward Octavia. "And here we are talking about Clarke's wedding."

"Basically responsible for an entire civilization in one way or another." Octavia added.

"I guess it is strange." Clarke declared. "As small as the ark felt most of the time, it really was big enough to where we didn't know everyone."

"Do you ever wonder if we would have been friends then?" Raven asked. "If circumstances had been different and Octavia could have been free and you and I were in the same year in school or in the same internship program." She meant Clarke.

"I guess not." Clarke shared. "The ark wasn't all bad, but near the end…" She faded out. "It's just not something I think about often."

"I guess I just wonder sometimes."

"About what?" Octavia asked. "Specifically, I mean?"  
"Finn mostly." Raven confessed. Clarke gulped. "I really loved him. If things had been different on the ark, maybe he and I would still be together. Maybe he'd be here."

Clarke didn't know how to respond to that. They'd long since put aside that part of their history and begun a real friendship, but whenever Finn came up in a conversation, she couldn't help but think about Raven.

"I do think about that sometimes." Clarke finally spoke up. "If there was a way I could have saved him. Me getting taken to Mount Weather is what caused him to…" She stopped herself. "The problem is that I'd have to keep going back further… to when we first landed on the ground. Maybe even to when I was back on the ark. Maybe if I wouldn't have sided with my dad, I wouldn't have been on the ship to begin with and he never would have met me and…"

"That does no one any good." Octavia remarked. "We can all do that… go back in time and try to figure out if we could change things how it would have ended up differently." She paused. "The problem is doing all of that can take away the good that came out of it too."

"She's right." Raven agreed. "One day, I'll look back on all this and I'll know that everything happened for a reason. Finn had to die so that other things could happen."

"Yeah, so that Clarke could meet Lexa for example." Octavia stated without thinking and quickly turned toward Raven. "Raven, I'm sorry. I didn't-"  
"No, it's okay." Raven smiled at her and then looked at Clarke. "That is how you ended up meeting her and while I am happy you two are together, I'm happier that you just met her and she seemed to trust you and you seemed to trust her." She paused. "Mount Weather didn't exactly work out how we planned, but you two have gotten us here. I mean, I have a house. An actual house." She motioned around the small space and then scrunched her face up. "It's not exactly a clean house, but it's a house. I'm not in a small cell on a doomed ship and I actually matter here." She took a breath. "I'm making a difference now. I don't know what would have happened with Finn and I, but it's obvious you were always meant for Lexa so I can say it's clear you two wouldn't have ended up together at least." She tried and Clarke nodded in agreement. "I'll find someone someday." She finished hopefully.

"Think you'll get married like Wanheda over here?"

"I thought we buried that name a long time ago." Clarke replied. Octavia just laughed.

"I don't know. Maybe." Raven answered for herself. "I'll see how it goes with Clarke and Lexa first." She smirked.

Octavia stood.

"I wouldn't try to compare yourself to those two. We both know they were made for each other. I mean who else could put up with either of them?"

"That's true." Raven agreed.

"Well, this has been fun." Clarke replied sarcastically and stood too. The years since the peace had brought a lighter mood out in many people. Octavia and Raven had, it seemed, fully embraced their more sarcastic personalities and Clarke had adopted that element as well the more time she spent with them. She'd found herself joking more too since things were lighter these days and people could go entire conversations without mentioning blood or death; Lexa included. "So, you guys will be there tomorrow?"

"The whole world will be there, Clarke. That's why I asked if that's how you wanted to do this."

_____

Clarke left Raven's shortly after and took the long road home. She'd visited with Raven and asked Octavia to join them just to make sure they'd be in support of the wedding. People trusted them and she wanted to ensure they'd be there and be on the right side of things. She knew Octavia wasn't a fan of marriage on principle. Raven didn't seem to have an opinion either way. They both grew to like Lexa. Octavia had spent more time with her than Raven and Raven had definitely taken longer to warm up to the idea of them being a couple. Lexa was, after all, the Commander that sentenced Finn to death, forcing Clarke to put him out of his misery before the punishment could begin. Eventually though, they'd managed to get along at least and Raven knew Clarke loved her. She'd done her best to put her own feelings aside for their sake.

What they'd said did make Clarke think and that's why she took the long way home back to Lexa who would be waiting for her to eat dinner together and complete the preparations for the celebration of peace and now their wedding. Clarke had really never thought about the actual wedding. She'd only really thought about being Lexa's wife and Lexa being hers. That was what mattered to her more than anything. That they'd belong to each other officially.

She was thinking about it now though and wondering if she really wanted to have a large, public ceremony in front of the whole population of Polis and outlying lands. She'd always shied away from attention in the past even when people looked to her to make decisions. She did it because she had too; not because she craved power or wanted people to notice her.

She pictured it as she progressed toward Lexa. She wanted a small ceremony. She wanted only a few people there. She realized as she was slowly riding her horse that her heart was racing at the thought of a large crowd standing there watching her say her vows. She'd agreed quickly because, as usual, Lexa was right. Their union continued to be important to their people and making it official in front of the entire population would be a way to show that they were strong and would continue to lead as a team; a team that had somehow managed peace among warring tribes.

_____

"I thought we could have dinner out here tonight." Lexa told her when Clarke entered their room. She'd barely just entered the room when Lexa met her, gave her a quick kiss and helped her remove her jacket.

"The balcony?" Clarke looked over and saw a table and chairs on the balcony with someone placing food on it for them.

"It's a nice night." Lexa placed Clarke's jacket on their bed and took her by the hand.

"What's going on?" Clarke questioned.

Lexa never met her at the door like this and they'd never eaten on the balcony before.

"Nothing." Lexa offered. "I thought it would be nice to look out over the city tonight. Preparations are underway for the celebration. We can watch."

Clarke followed her out on the balcony and looked out over the city she'd called home for four years. She recalled back to Lexa mentioning Polis right before everything happened at Mount Weather. She told her it would change her mind about her people and Clarke reminded her that Lexa already had.

"The sun is setting." Clarke pointed out at the sky with its swirling pinks and oranges amongst the light shades of blues and whites. Lexa smiled at her and the woman preparing the table for them nodded and walked inside; done with her work. Neither of them said anything until they heard the heavy doors close behind her. "You planned a dinner at sunset, didn't you?" Clarke asked her with a smirk.

"Sit." Lexa didn't answer the question.

Clarke just shook her head at her. Lexa still had a problem just admitting when she did something particularly romantic or thoughtful. Clarke was certain she'd always have that problem. She recognized it in herself as well. She wasn't entirely sure where it came from, but she guessed it had to do with the fact that they couldn't be romantic in front of others. They had to shield it because of Lexa's position. They could be together, they could even marry, but they couldn't have a Commander that planned sunset dinners overlooking a city yet. Maybe in a few more years they'd be able to get away with things like this, but the peace was still too new to everyone.

"Are you going to answer my question?" Clarke asked her after Lexa sat down as well.

"I wanted to do something nice for you. Tonight is our last night…" She drifted off.

"Last night what? Not married?" Clarke tried to understand. Lexa just lifted her eyebrows in acknowledgement and took a drink.

"How were Octavia and Raven?" Lexa asked.

Clarke realized the eyebrow lift was probably all she'd get out of the girl to explain this bit of romance tonight.

"Fine." Clarke replied and began eating.

"I thought it would be appropriate to have Lincoln preside over the ceremony if you agree." Lexa shared. Clarke nodded. "What did you mother say when you visited her this afternoon?"

"She knew I was asking you. That part wasn't a shock. Getting married tomorrow in front of everyone was." Clarke admitted. "But she understood he reasoning."

Lexa tilted her head to the side and stared at Clarke who first looked down at her plate and then out at the city.

"Is this not what you want?" Lexa finally managed to barely whisper out, afraid at what Clarke's answer might be.

Clarke turned to her immediately and met her eyes.

"Of course this is what I want. I asked you."

"I know that, Clarke. I meant the ceremony at the celebration. I said it in the moment, but if you'd rather something else… If you want to wait…"

Clarke smiled at her.

"Do you mind if I skip dinner?" Clarke asked her. "I forgot something I need to take care of before tomorrow." Clarke stood abruptly.

Lexa looked worried and confused.

"Clarke, what…"

"I'll be back later."

Lexa stood and watched as Clarke made it back to their bed and grabbed her jacket to put it back on.

"Clarke, wait. What's happening?"

"I just forgot something. Everything is okay." Clarke told her as Lexa followed her inside. "Finish dinner. I'll be back soon." She kissed Lexa's cheek quickly and rushed toward the door with a smile on her face.

Lexa took a deep breath. She had no idea what had just happened. They were supposed to eat dinner together and finish the plans for their ceremony tomorrow. She sat on the edge of the bed, unmoving.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21:

Clarke was smiling as she left the room because she knew what she wanted. She'd also remembered while staring at Lexa across that table that she was always good at figuring out what Lexa wanted too despite sometimes what Lexa said out loud. Lexa was the Commander after all and it made sense to have a public ceremony. She was also just a girl and she could be a shy one at that. There were many sides to Lexa. Clarke had come to understand all of them throughout the years, but it wouldn't surprise her if another side came out someday in the future that she'd get to know as well.

It didn't take too long to do what she wanted to do. The supplies were already in the building. The only thing she really needed was the people. Luckily, communication at Polis was easier these days as certain people had landline telephones put together by Skaikru engineering. The goal was to eventually get a phone to every home, but parts were limited so leaders got them first within the past year and some others received radios. Clarke was able to reach out to a few people by phone and some others by radio and within a couple of hours, she was ready to return to her room.

She stood behind the door for a moment, taking a deep breath. She looked down at the floor and smiled as she shook her head. She knew this was the right thing to do. She knew it in her gut, in her soul, in her bones. Lexa was her one. She recalled her earlier conversation with Raven about what might have happened with Finn and she laughed lightly recalling that she thought that was love back then. Maybe that's what Raven had with Finn, but Clarke now knew the difference.

She opened the door and saw Lexa sitting on the edge of the bed. She looked to the balcony and saw their dinner was still setup and the candles in the room had now been lit.

"You didn't eat dinner?" Clarke asked her instead of saying what she'd planned to say.

"You weren't here." Lexa stated. Her hands were clasped in her lap. She stood slowly and clasped them behind her back instead. Clarke smirked.

"No, no standing like that." Clarke ordered and walked toward her. She wrapped her arms around Lexa's waist forcing Lexa's arms to move from behind her back and move instead behind Clarke's neck. "Everything is fine. Will you just trust me?"

"You left."

"I needed to move quickly."

"Clarke, please talk to me." Lexa's eyes expressed her concern.

"You look beautiful." Clarke pointed out. Lexa was wearing one of her two dresses. Clarke had noticed it before, but failed to remark on it with the surprise that awaited her on the balcony. "Your hair is getting longer." She pulled herself back a little and ran her fingers through the ends of Lexa's hair that was flowing down past her shoulders. "I like it like this." She returned her glance to Lexa's eyes. "Can you give me 5 minutes? I'll meet you right outside in the hall."

Lexa looked down and pulled her arms back.

"I'm not good at this, Clarke. Please tell me what's wrong."

"What are you talking about?" Clarke asked her. "Good at what?"

"Reading your mind." Lexa's eyes got big for a moment. "Please…"

Clarke leaned in and gently touched her lips to Lexa's. Lexa didn't respond so Clarke pulled them back realizing that Lexa wasn't exactly raised to enjoy surprises. Surprises to a Commander, in battle, with ambassadors were rarely, if ever, a good thing.

"Five minutes. I promise nothing is wrong. Everything is right."

Lexa reluctantly nodded and walked toward the door in her long, flowing gray and blue dress.

When the door was closed behind her, Clarke went to work. It took a few minutes longer than the five she promised, but she'd guessed Lexa wouldn't care once she knew what they were doing.

When she emerged, Lexa was pacing up and down the hallway. There were no guards outside their room these days. They did walk the halls in shifts, but they were no longer required to stand in place guarding against potential threats. When she turned back around to see Clarke standing there, she stopped in her tracks and took her in.

"That's…" She looked her up and down for another moment. "I thought you were going to wear that tomorrow." Lexa pointed out the dress that Clarke had changed into. They'd discussed what they'd wear that morning briefly before tending to other plans for the wedding.

"I said I would wear it to our wedding." Clarke reiterated. "And I am." She took a few steps toward Lexa. "Come with me please."

Lexa was speechless as Clarke took her hand and walked her toward the elevator. Skaikru had managed to hook the elevator up to the grid so it no longer required men to operate it. They stood together silently as it crept slowly down several levels until it opened with a creak.

"Clarke, wait!" Lexa pulled her back the moment after they'd left the elevator. Clarke turned back toward her. "Is this what I think this is?" Lexa finally asked.

Clarke took both of Lexa's hands in her own.

"Tomorrow is for them." She referenced the people of Polaris. "Tonight is for us." She let go of one of Lexa's hands and turned to continue walking. Lexa smiled shyly and walked beside her.

They moved to enter the room that had long been the room the ambassadors met in, but tonight it would hold a different kind of ceremony; one it had never held before.

Two men opened the large doors as Clarke and Lexa stood behind them. The room was filled with more candles than had possibly ever been in the entire building. They flickered against the backdrop of gray walls that now held a few paintings from Lexa's collection as well. There were also a few of Clarke's mixed in as well. Lexa had commissioned images of each of the clans and Clarke had worked with the clan leaders to make them all happen. Lincoln stood at the front of the room. Lexa's eyes darted from person to person. Everyone they cared about was in this room. Abby, Kane, Jaha, Raven, Octavia, Jasper, Monty, and a few more from the original Skaikru stood mixed with a few of the ambassadors Clarke knew Lexa actually liked on a personal level beyond the political. Indra was there as were a few of the people Clarke knew Lexa liked and trusted. Nearly everyone in the room had a smile on their face. Octavia's was more reserved. Abby's was wide. Indra's appeared and then quickly disappeared. Lincoln was trying to remain professional at the front of the room as the two women walked toward him hand in hand. There was no music; no pretense. It was just the two of them with the people they loved and that was exactly what Clarke wanted and as they arrived at their destination and she turned to face Lexa, she could tell it was exactly what she wanted as well.

"We don't have many weddings in Polaris." Lincoln began. "This is definitely the first one in this room and the first between a Commander and a Flamekeeper." A few people lightly laughed. Clarke and Lexa were all smiles. "Clarke asked me to keep this brief since we're doing this again tomorrow night in front of everyone. Trikru didn't have weddings like this so I had to ask some people from Skaikru what I should do." He paused and looked at their connected hands as they stood facing one another. Clarke was sure everyone could hear her heart racing, but if they couldn't, Lexa definitely could. She knew she could feel Lexa's hands shaking in her own and she rubbed her thumbs calmingly over them. "Clarke?" He motioned to her with his hand.

"Last night when I asked you to marry me, I had this speech planned and then I saw you and I couldn't remember any of it." She shook her head at herself and looked toward the floor; not able to meet Lexa's eyes in this moment. "I wanted to have this with you tonight, but I didn't plan what I would say when I got up here. I don't know what I could say though because I don't think there are words that describe what we are to each other." She took a deep breath and finally looked up to see tears welling up in Lexa's expressive eyes. "I wanted this with you, Lexa. I think I've always wanted this with you. I just didn't realize it at first. It took us a while to get here because we had to put other things first, but we're here now." Clarke continued. "And I love you so much. You are smart and wise and you are kind and selfless. You're beautiful and you never seem to notice it." She watched Lexa laugh. "Your laugh… it took me forever to actually hear it and I've been hearing it more and more now. Your smile is perfect. You're even funny sometimes." Lexa rolled her eyes. "Like right now for example." That caused a few people to laugh. "I love all of you." She finished.

"Commander?" Lincoln waited.

"Lexa." She replied and looked at him.

"Lexa." He repeated and understood his mistake.

Her eyes quickly darted around the room and then returned to Clarke.

"I don't…" She tried, but gulped instead. She leaned in and whispered, "I'm not… I had a speech prepared for tomorrow, Clarke. I didn't…"

"I don't need a speech." Clarke whispered back.

Lexa side-eyed the small group and took a deep breath.

"I was chosen to be Commander and to be Commander means to be alone. That's what I believed for most of my life." She paused. "I accepted that this was my role and understood that I was chosen to put the needs of my people over my own. Then, I met you." She couldn't believe she was saying this in front of other people. "You questioned me, you made me think differently about the things I had been taught; the things I'd been told. You made me want to live. There were times I thought I'd lost you; that you'd never return my affection. Each of those times hurt worse than the one before." Again, there were tears welling up in her eyes and as she looked into Clarke's she could see they looked glassy as well. "You are the one person in this world that makes me believe that anything is possible, Clarke. I am yours forever." She took another breath and looked down at the floor as if to gather herself.

Clarke didn't hear anything Lincoln said after that and the way Lexa was looking at her after she'd lifted her eyes from the floor led her to believe that Lexa wasn't listening either. They shared small smiles as their hands remained locked together; the shaking finally subsiding.

"Clarke and Lexa, you are now joined; bonded together for all your lives."

"Kiss each other already!" It was Raven's voice.

Everyone laughed as Clarke and Lexa smiled at each other. It was a nice way to release their nervous energy. Clarke moved first and disconnected their hands. She placed her hands on Lexa's hips before Lexa moved her hands to Clarke's cheek and around the back of her neck. She gently pulled her toward her and their lips connected before Clarke had to pull back because Lexa was smiling so big, it made it difficult to actually kiss her.

There was applause, but neither girl could hear them. They embraced one another for a long moment before people started approaching them and pulled them apart for hugs. The former Sky People did most of the hugging while the former grounders mainly engaged in the handshake they'd used for a century.

"I'm so proud of you, honey." Abby shared as Clarke pulled away from their hug. Kane hugged her as well and then stood off to the side. "Should I assume there's no party tonight?" Abby checked.

Clarke nodded.

"We'll save that for tomorrow." She looked over at Lexa who was shaking hands with Octavia. "Tonight was just about us. Tomorrow, we'll do it all over again with a whole ceremony and the party."

"I understand."

"Clarke, have you two thought about taking a honeymoon?" Kane asked.

"I doubt anyone has taken a honeymoon in 100 years." Jaha added.

Clarke knew about honeymoons from the TV shows they'd watched on the ark and the books they'd read, but Jaha was right. No one on the ark ever took a honeymoon and she was sure no one on earth had taken one since the bombs.

"She's the Commander. Not exactly easy to get away."

"Something tells me you'll figure it out." Abby expressed. "No one ever thought a Commander would get married and yet here we are."

"You tamed the beast." Raven shared jokingly.

"Did you just call my girlfriend a beast?" Clarke smiled at her. She caught herself, but before she could correct it, someone else did.

"No, she just called your wife a beast." It was Lexa who had walked up behind her during the conversation. "But I believe Raven meant it as a joke."

Raven laughed and nodded.

"Wife? That's going to take some getting used too." Octavia pointed out.

"Tell me about it." Abby agreed.

"Okay…" Clarke took Lexa's hand. "Thank you all for coming, but-"  
"We 'll leave you two alone." Kane spoke for the group and put his hand on the small of his wife's back. "Are you ready?"

"We'll see you tomorrow." She reached to give Clarke a one-armed hug since Clarke was still tightly grasping Lexa's hand. "Congratulations, you two."

Others shared their congratulations before they left the room until Clarke and Lexa remained alone.

"You are a constant surprise, Clarke kom Skaikru." Lexa offered the silence.

"Come on, let's go." Clarke deflected and pulled her back toward the elevator. "We still have to plan the wedding that the rest of Polaris will actually see. I told everyone here to keep this one a secret and-"

"Clarke?"

They made it to the elevator and opened it to climb in.

"What?"

"Shof op!" Lexa commanded as the elevator ascended.

"Did you just tell me to be quiet?" Clarke questioned with a laugh.

Lexa pressed her against the back wall of the elevator.

"Yes." She leaned in and captured her lips for a real kiss this time. Clarke's hands wrapped themselves around Lexa's back and began greedily traveling up and down while Lexa's went around her neck and got lost in Clarke's long hair. Lexa's lips moved to Clarke's neck and when they heard the elevator stop and the door open, Clarke began pushing forward forcing Lexa to walk backwards while her lips were still attached to her neck.

"Let's just get down the hall." Clarke got out between pants.

"Mm." Lexa replied while still walking backwards. Her hands now running up and down Clarke's sides and then front.

They made it to their room and as soon as the door was closed behind them, Lexa was undoing the back of Clarke's dress. It wasn't the first time she'd worn it and it wasn't the first time Lexa had removed it for her. It was now Clarke moving backwards as Lexa began walking her toward the bed. Clarke's hands were occupied as well trying to get at the back of Lexa's dress, but Lexa had her on the bed before she got a chance. Instead Clarke slid herself back against the head of the bed watching as Lexa undid her own dress and joined her; lying on top of her as she again connected their lips.

"I take it you liked my idea." Clarke suggested when Lexa's lips moved down to her collarbone.

Lexa stopped and looked up at Clarke.

"How did you know?"

"Well, this reaction is an indication." Clarke replied with a smirk.

Lexa smiled back thoughtfully.

"How did you know that I wished for something more private for the two of us?"

Clarke ran her hand through Lexa's hair.

"I didn't, honestly. I thought you wanted the public ceremony tomorrow until I was sitting at dinner with you and I realized that I wanted something for just us. I looked at you and thought about who you really were." She paused and played with the tips of Lexa's dark hair. "You'll do the ceremony tomorrow because it's what's good for everyone, but when it's just you and I, it's special. I wanted special with you tonight and I thought you would too."

"I finally married you." Lexa let out almost as a sigh.

"Shh…" Clarke pressed her finger to Lexa's lips. "It's a secret."

Lexa lowered her lips to meet Clarke's and they celebrated the fact that at least tonight, they would be just two people in love who'd gotten married. Tomorrow, they could be the Commander and the Flamekeeper.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22:

When Clarke woke up, Lexa wasn't in the bed with her. She squinted her eyes in confusion and sat up looking around the room; holding a sheet against her chest as if Lexa had never seen her naked before.

"Lexa?" She finally asked the room and received no answer.

She wrapped the sheet around her as she stood up from the bed and walked toward the bathroom. No Lexa. She walked over to her dresser and opened the top drawer. Inside was clothing, but not all of the clothing she'd expect to find. In fact, it was laid out as if she had done it herself preparing for the next day. She opened the other drawers and found that they were empty. She walked over to where Lexa kept her clothes and other items and realized they were all missing. She dressed quickly in her confusion. She was worried about where her new wife was the morning after they married as well as where the Commander was the day of their celebration of peace and larger, more public ceremony. She had no idea what had happened to their things, but that was the last of her worries at the moment. She'd been so tired after last night, she'd fallen asleep quickly and soundly and apparently hadn't woken up to anyone taking their things or possibly her wife. The planning of their last minute ceremony and the activities that took place for several hours after helped to ensure she wouldn't wake up easily.

After dressing, she pulled her hair back in a tie and left the room. She'd wished in that moment that they'd left the guards at the door. She was the one that convinced Lexa they could patrol instead of remaining stationary. Maybe that was premature. Maybe people weren't a peaceful as she'd been led to believe. This was the day of the celebration. Maybe someone was trying to prevent the wedding or kill the Commander to end the peace. Too many thoughts were swirling around in her brain as she moved down the hallway toward the elevator. She entered, hit the button and waited impatiently as it arrived at the floor of the assembly room. She rushed toward the space their wedding had been in just a few short hours ago, but while the candles remained half-used and unlit, Lexa was not there. She moved through the building quickly finding a guard on patrol.

"Have you seen the Commander?" She asked him.

"She is waiting for you." He replied and pointed toward the building's entrance.

"She's waiting for me?" Clarke questioned, but followed his hand which pointed toward the door.

Once outside, she could see Lexa standing next to their horses. She took a deep breath in and then out before taking a few steps toward her.

"Good morning." Lexa greeted with a smile.

"Good morning?" Clarke retorted. "I woke up and you weren't there." Clarke reminded her as she approached and lowered her voice. "Do you have any idea what it's like to get married and wake up the next morning without your wife there when she also happens to be the leader of her people who in the not so recent past would have done anything to prevent continued peace?"

Lexa placed her hand on Clarke's cheek.

"I did not intend to worry you. I had preparations of my own to make and they too required some last minute work; not unlike a certain ceremony you left me for last night with no explanation." Lexa lifted her eyebrows.

Clarke sighed.

"What are you doing out here and where's our stuff?" She asked her.

"I am sorry for worrying you. I wanted to surprise you. Will you come with me?" She asked her.

"Of course I'll come with you, but don't we have to plan-"

"Not right now, Clarke."

Lexa climbed onto her horse and Clarke did the same. They rode off toward the edge of Polis in the direction of the newly built expansion. The farmlands were covered in growing crops and the farmers were already out tending to them. Clarke watched workers building structures to her right.

_____

"Do you ever stop to think about all this?" Clarke asked her as they rode along with two guards flanking them.

"About what?"

"This. All of this." Clarke looked around. "None of this was here before and now it is."

Lexa looked over at her and smiled.

"I think about it all the time, Clarke."

"You are the Commander so I guess that's part of the job."

"I don't think about it because of that." She explained. "There's a part of me that is the Commander and understands logically what we've done here, but the other part of me; the part you helped bring out sees this all differently."

Clarke smiled and looked over at her.

"How so?"

Lexa looked over at her guards who appeared to be doing their jobs and monitoring their surroundings; not paying attention to their conversation.

"We did this together. You and I." She pointed out at one of the hospitals they'd built. "You drew that. You planned it with Abby and the healers and you drew it out for them. Then, the people built it." She motioned toward one of the farms off to the left ahead of them. "I planted the first plant there two years ago. You were beside me. We've done so much together, Clarke."

"We have." Clarke agreed.

"We've started a new chapter in our life together now and I want to mark that somehow."

"What do you mean?" Clarke checked.

"You'll see." Lexa promised.

Clarke wasn't sure what to expect, but given the fact that Lexa rarely surprised her, but when she did, they were always good surprises and often impactful ones, she decided not to question her wife.

After several more minutes of riding, Lexa appeared to be getting excited. Clarke saw her get excited every so often, but it was mainly when they were alone and in their bedroom. Rarely did she see Lexa look this excitedly anxious and somewhat jittery in front of others.

"We're here." She climbed down off her horse. Her guards did the same and took the reins of Lexa's horse for her and then Clarke's as well after she hopped off.

"Where's here, Lexa?" She asked as she looked around.

"Commanders have always resided in Polis. They lived in that building; in that room. For 100 years, no Commander has ever thought to leave." Lexa took Clarke's hand and began walking forward. "But no Commander has ever gotten married or even had a significant relationship of any kind and that room is small and I wanted something for us."

Clarke looked ahead of them. In about 100 feet, there was a house. It was larger than any of the other houses she'd seen built. All around the house was open space. To the left of the house was a small field with a short fence blocking it off. Crops had been planted there. To the right, there appeared to be an area for training. There were spears, bows, arrows and other weapons resting against a wall and the grass had been removed, leaving room for dirt to be placed down instead.

"Lexa…"

"There are fruit trees in the back." Lexa motioned to the little field. "We can grow what we need for the most part here. I had them put in a space to train." She pointed at the space Clarke had already noticed. "I'm still the Commander after all." She turned to Clarke as if to check if that was okay. Clarke was still in shock and didn't even look back at her. "I was thinking you would use it too. We can train together. Maybe you could learn the bow. Indra prefers the sword, but she's also a master with the bow. I'm sure she would teach you if you expressed interest."

"This is ours?" Clarke finally spoke up after Lexa's nervous rambling.

"Yes." She replied.

"When did you do all this?" Clarke finally looked away from the house and toward Lexa.

"They started building it about 9 months ago. Do you want to see it?" She questioned hopefully.

"Yes." Clarke managed.

Lexa walked her toward the front door, which was made of a hard wood. She opened the door for Clarke and allowed her to walk in first. Lexa wanted to see her first impression, but also didn't want to see it at the same time; afraid of what Clarke might think of it. She followed in behind her and closed the door.

"Do you remember that drawing Abby asked you to do for her house with Kane?" Lexa asked her after several moments of watching Clarke look around in the small entryway.

Clarke turned toward her immediately.

"This is it, isn't it?" Clarke asked.

"I asked Abby to ask you do to that." She paused and took a few steps toward her wife. "She told you to design something you'd want."

"She said she trusted me, but after I did it, she said she wanted something smaller and I just put the original drawing away." Clarke began piecing things together. Lexa smirked. "You did that?"

"I found it, yes. They've been working on this ever since. Is it what you'd imagined?" She asked again with hope dripping from her question.

Clarke took in the small rooms to the right and left and the staircase in front of her. Before going up though, she went down the hall and found a small kitchen. It appeared, at least at first glance that Lexa had incorporated electricity as well as natural lighting into the house.

"This is perfect." Clarke finally stated out loud. "I can't believe you did this."

"You should go upstairs." Lexa suggested.

Clarke turned back around and walked up the small staircase. It was only wide enough for her to walk up with Lexa following close behind. At the top of their stairs there were three rooms other than the bathroom that was about the same size as the one they had in Polis. Clarke immediately knew which one Lexa wanted her to walk into first as soon as she saw it through the open door.

"You can paint and draw in here." Lexa told her as she stood in the door way and watched Clarke walk around the room she'd had laid out with easels, paper and other supplies Clarke might need. Clarke turned around to look at the woman she loved more than anything and she hung her head for a moment; shaking it in disbelief. "What? What's wrong?" Lexa took a step toward her. "Is this not-"

"I love you. Every time I think I can't love you anymore, you do something like this and I realize I do." She wrapped her arms around Lexa's neck and pulled her into her. "Are you sure about this? Us living here instead of right there where you need to be everyday?" Clarke asked while still holding onto her.

"There will be some nights where I must stay in Polis, but yes I am sure. This is what I want, Clarke." She pulled herself back a moment. "Those nights I must remain in Polis… I don't have to be alone." She propositioned. Clarke smiled at her and pressed her forehead against Lexa's.

"Show me the bedroom." Clarke said. Lexa's eyes grew wide. "Not for that." Clarke explained. "We can't stay here all day. We have a party to get back for." She reminded.

Lexa smiled again and walked her down the hall.

"This is our room." She pointed out. "We can change anything you want."

"Why do you keep assuming I want to change anything?" Clarke asked her with a light laugh. Lexa didn't respond.

"There's another room. Do you want to see it?"

"Yes."

Lexa nodded and ushered her toward the room immediately to the right of their bedroom.

"Here."

"There's nothing in here yet."

"I thought this could be our meeting room when we're not in Polis. I'm having things brought over soon."

"Your office?" Clarke guessed.

"If that's what you want to call it, but I thought it would belong to both of us. I know you are not an ambassador anymore, Clarke, but you are the Flamekeeper and you should have a place as well where you can work."

"I have the other room." Clarke pointed out.

"That is not for work, Clarke." Lexa reminded. "That is for when you do not want to work." She smiled at her.

Clarke walked over toward the window and stared out. She felt her move behind her and wrap her arms around her waist. Lexa's head went to Clarke's shoulder as they stared out the window together.

"It's beautiful, Lexa."

"I had planned to present this house to you in a few weeks, but I thought it might be appropriate if after our celebration tonight, we stay here. I would have had us stay here last night, but I did not expect a private, surprise wedding." Clarke tilted her head to the side to rest against Lexa's head.

"Why in a few weeks? It seems like it's done."

"I planned on asking you to marry me." Lexa professed. "We've never had marriage in the way you did on the ark, but after I heard about your mother and Kane and I saw how happy it seemed to make them and you talked to me about how your mother met your father and how they'd described their ceremony to you… you smiled while you explained it and I realized that I wanted you to be mine forever." She paused. "We've said that to each other before, but the Skaikru concept of forever seemed to culminate in this ceremony so I wanted to give that to you." She kissed Clarke's cheek.

"I never thought I'd want that until I met you." Clarke confessed. "Then, I'd never thought we'd get that. I was sure one or both of us-"  
"Would have died at war?" Lexa completed for her. Clarke just nodded.

"What is your concept of forever? What was it down here?"

"I suppose you will see that tonight, but it has never been done by a Commander before in front of a large crowd. It is usually done between two people in private. They might have family there, but that is their choice. Many warriors choose not to engage in this at all since there was often a chance they may not return."

"Maybe our ceremony will help them realize that war is over." Clarke proposed. She turned in Lexa's arms. "Come on. We should get back."

"I've had our things brought over. They will be moved in here by the time we return tonight."

Clarke's arms went around her neck.

"Is that why you planned that dinner outside last night? Because it was our last night there?"

Lexa smiled at her and pressed her forehead to Clarke's shoulder.

"I thought it would be a nice thing to do for our last night there, yes."

"I swear sometimes… I should tell everyone just how romantic you can be." Clarke told her with a small laugh and Lexa lifted her head and showed her large, concerned eyes. "But I won't." Clarke continued. "I like being the only one that knows that about you."

"I like being the only one that knows that there's one spot on your body that when kissed causes you to feel it everywhere and just about guarantees…"

Clarke cleared her throat as Lexa attempted to start something.

"We need to go now." Clarke reminded her and she took in Lexa's look of disappointment attached to a knowing smirk.

"Yes, we do."

"I know us moving here is already a big change, but does that bed in our room have to stay there?" Clarke asked as they walked down the stairs.

"Not necessarily." Lexa replied.

"Can it be brought here instead?"

Lexa laughed.

"Of course."


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23:

"What does it feel like?" Octavia asked Clarke as she stood in the room waiting for Clarke to finish getting ready. They were alone. Lexa was getting ready in another room.

"Being married?" Clarke questioned as she stuck her head out of the bathroom to see Octavia looking at her dress, which was still lying on the bed waiting for her to put it on.

"Yeah, what's it feel like?"

"Pretty much the same, I guess. I don't think it's really hit me yet though."

"When will it hit you?"

"I don't know. I don't think that's a thing anyone knows." She reached her hand out. "Can you hand me that?" She asked of the dress. Octavia picked it up and passed it to the arm sticking out of the bathroom.

"Why is Lexa not in here with you? You're already married."

"She just told me she was going to get ready in another room."

"Weird." Octavia sat on the edge of the bed.

"That's my wife, Octavia." Clarke reminded.

"And she can be weird sometimes. I think you can agree with that." Octavia replied. "She's my Commander and I can admit that."

"Wife isn't exactly the same thing as Commander."

"Thank God." Octavia replied sarcastically.

"You really don't want to ever do this with Lincoln?" Clarke asked loudly from behind the wall. "You two have been together longer than Lexa and I."

"He knows I'm not the marrying kind. Besides, they didn't exactly do the marriage thing before Sky People got here. It was more of a glorified handshake from what I've heard. I love Lincoln. He loves me. That's all I need."

Clarke emerged from the bathroom. Her hair was down, but braided in the grounder style of old. She'd had it done earlier in the day by one of the healers who'd she'd gotten close to over the years. Her dress was a deep blue. It was long and flowing. It was not the dress she'd worn the previous night. This was a new dress. It had been a gift from Octavia, which was why she was there waiting for Clarke to put it on.

"What do you think?"

Octavia stood and took her in.

"For a girl who spent the better part of her life trapped under a floor, I have a good eye."

"You didn't have to get me this, you know?"  
"It's a wedding present." She paused and took a step toward Clarke. "I may never want to wear something like this, but you and Lexa want too. I know you two find me annoying sometimes, but Clarke, you two are two of my closest friends. I am happy for you." Octavia reluctantly stated before looking anywhere other than Clarke's eyes. Clarke shook her head at her and brought her in for a hug. It took a moment, but Octavia returned the embrace. They'd gone through a lot together. They'd fought sometimes on the same side; sometimes on the opposite, but they'd both fought and they both respected each other and only wanted the best for the other.

"Thank you." Clarke pulled back from the hug. "Did you know Lexa's favorite color was blue when you bought it?"

Octavia looked at her somehow simultaneously disgusted and confused at the same time.

"Why would I know your wife's favorite color, Clarke? Can the Commander even have a favorite color other than black?" She somewhat joked. "Anyway, I'll see you out there I guess. Leave it to Clarke Griffin to get married twice in two days." She started to leave. "At least it's to the same person."

"I'll see you soon, Octavia."

Octavia turned around and mockingly bowed.

"May we meet again." She opened the door and disappeared behind it.

Clarke smiled at her friend's comment. That phrase had long been a dark one. It had been reserved for situations where death was more than possible, but seemingly inevitable. It had only recently turned into something people could bring up in a lighter context. Clarke suspected it was Octavia's sarcasm that had been responsible for it after what she'd just witnessed. The truth was that the only death that had occurred in Polaris these past few years was natural or accidental. There had been no battles; no war and no blood.

Clarke had been standing in the room alone for several moments before she remembered that she shouldn't be nervous. They were already married. This was really just for show. She laughed silently at herself and began to walk toward the door and down the hall. The ceremony would take place at sunset. That was Lexa's favorite time of the day. Clarke had learned that over the years as well. It was nearly time. Abby and Kane met her at the entrance of the building. People were already in a celebratory mood and Polis was busier than normal since nearly entire population had made it in for the party. Abby hugged Clarke after taking in the new dress and telling her she looked beautiful. Kane did the same and then they walked with her and a few guards toward where the Polis assemblies were usually held. They'd build an outdoor amphitheater of sorts for the first celebration. Each year, Lexa made a speech for the crowd. This year, she'd do the same, but she'd also introduce Clarke's mural and tiny museum that people could tour in turn.

_____

They arrived and Clarke saw Indra on the stage already with Lincoln. Octavia was there too, but appeared to be more engaged with scanning the crowd for potential threats than in any conversation. She looked to the crowd and noticed Raven laughing with Monty and Jasper and their girlfriends. It was then that Clarke noticed Wick coming up behind Raven. He tapped her on the shoulder and Clarke watched as Raven turned. It took a moment, but then there was a hug exchanged between them and they carried on a conversation. Wick had managed to keep himself far away from Raven since she ended their relationship. Clarke had worked with him a few times on the phone lines and other things. He'd dated a few women since Raven, but none of those relationship has worked out. Raven, on the other hand, had been pretty much single since their relationship ended. Clarke watched as they both awkwardly smiled at one another and then they seemed to laugh about it. She turned her attention back to the stage and it was then that she saw her.

"Oh my God." She muttered to herself.

"What?" Abby questioned and then followed Clarke's eyes. "Oh." She took Kane's hand. "We'll leave you two alone." She smiled and pulled him along with her.

Lexa stood 10 feet away from her. She'd spotted Clarke before Clarke had spotted her and when their eyes finally met, Lexa's smile was the widest Clarke had ever seen. Clarke was too in shock to smile back though. Lexa had her hair down and off to one side of her shoulder; Clarke's favorite. She was also wearing a dress Clarke had never seen before and she guessed that's why Lexa wanted to get ready alone. It was light blue and long like Clarke's, but had a slit up most of the right leg revealing just enough of Lexa to make Clarke's heart pound inside her chest. The dress had a somewhat low cut v in it's front and was sleeveless. It reminded Clarke of dresses she'd seen in old history books about the Romans. She looked a level of beautiful Clarke hadn't thought humans could ever obtain.

"You chose blue as well?" Lexa asked her when she approached.

"It was a present from Octavia." Clarke admitted.

"As was this." Lexa revealed.

Clarke looked up at the stage and saw Octavia looking over, laugh and roll her eyes before returning to her task.

"You look amazing." Clarke was finally able to get out after her heart stopped pounding quite as loudly.

"So do you." Lexa replied. "Everyone has gathered. Should we begin?"

Clarke smiled and nodded.

Lexa took Clarke's hand and they walked up the steps of the stage. Indra spied them approaching and nodded to Lincoln who turned to see them as well. Octavia moved off to the side of the stage and when Lexa and Clarke made it to the center, there was a near instant hush in the crowd.

"Are you ready?" Lincoln asked.

They looked at one another and smiled.

"Heda, would you like to address the crowd before the ceremony?" Indra asked.

"After." Lexa replied.

Clarke looked out over the crowd. There were thousands of people as far as the eye could see. When Lexa climbed on the small stage, the people who had been celebrating and drinking and laughing, had all stopped. Everyone was turned toward them. Thousands of eyes were watching something that had never happened before. Clarke had been told what to expect for the actual ceremony. It would be brief. It would be very different than their intimate and romantic ceremony from the night before, but for both of them that was more than fine.

Lincoln turned to address the crowd.

"Devon, oso tai op Heda en Fleimkepa in jus en fleim. Hofli, emo keryon laik won feva." Today, we bind Commander and Flamekeeper in blood and flame. May their spirits be one forever.

Lincoln had to yell that and even in doing so, it was likely not everyone heard it. Clarke and Lexa would not be yelling their words.

Indra approached and handed Lexa a small knife. She took a step back.

"Oso tai choda op kom jus." Lexa said only for Clarke and the others on the stage to hear. We bind ourselves in blood. She used the knife to slice her hand. She passed it to Clarke who did the same.

"Oso tai choda op kom jus." Clarke repeated. The last time she had to do this was with the Ice Queen and she had very different intentions back then.

Lexa held out her hand and Clarke took it. Their black and red blood mixed as was the custom. A moment later, Lincoln handed Clarke a small bandage and Indra handed one to her Commander. They took turns tying them onto each other. Then, Indra passed Lexa a small torch. Lincoln handed an identical one to Clarke. Lexa took Clarke's hand and they walked toward the side of the stage. After a moment, with their hands tightly clasped, they lowered the torches until they dipped into fuel and two flames became one. Clarke had been told that most people do this with candles, but as the Commander, Lexa wanted to make sure the whole world saw a giant unity flame signifying their union, but also the union and continued peace between all people. The giant flame extended over the top of the stage and when it finally lit up brightening against the backdrop of the setting sun, the crowd erupted in applause. The ceremony was over. They were officially married in the eyes of everyone. Clarke wanted nothing more than to kiss Lexa in that moment, but she knew she couldn't. It didn't help that Lexa's dress was actually her favorite color as well. They'd discovered in the beginning of their relationship that they'd both liked blue. Lexa, enjoyed the darker shades while Clarke preferred the lighter ones. Octavia was observant and didn't like to take credit for it apparently.

Indra and Lincoln took their torches and stood back against the wall of the stage while Lexa, still grasping Clarke's hand walked toward the front. She held up her hand and Clarke still found herself marveling at the way these people follow her because the roaring applause stopped almost at once.

"Today, we celebrate the continued peace of our people." Lexa shouted. "All clans working together to maintain it; to grow together. Today is a day I am proud to be your Commander." She paused and there were applause and some shouts from the crowd. "Much has changed these past years and once where we celebrate jus drein jus daun, we now understand that peace is possible. Blood must not have blood." She paused to allow for some more shouts in agreement to come from the crowd. "We will continue to build. We will continue to expand our peace, but we will also continue to prepare ourselves. We do not know what lies beyond our lands. There may be enemies who wish to take our world from us. We will not find ourselves without warriors; without generals, but we no longer celebrate death and blood. Clarke is now of Trikru as I am now of Skaikru. We share our blood. We join in flame. We are as one." Lexa squeezed her hand and Clarke noticed she'd paused, but she wasn't sure why she'd chosen that moment for it until another roar erupted from the crowd. She looked out over the thousands and watched as they cheered their union. She gulped as she looked down at her mother and Kane, Raven with Wick standing behind her, Jasper and Monty, Octavia standing near them with Lincoln apparently having had joined her without Clarke noticing. Before she had a moment to take in all of them applauding and shouting their words of approval, Lexa's hand again went up to quiet the crowd. "Clarke is Heda as I am Heda. You must all take a solemn vow." She paused. The crowd was somewhat silent. Clarke hadn't expected her to say this; to have them pledge their allegiance to Clarke as they had their Commander. "Swega em klin." Swear it.

It took a moment, but then Clarke heard it coming from the crowd. Slowly at first, but then as if in unison, she heard voices say words she understood.

"Ai swega em klin." I swear it.

"Ai swega em klin."

"Ai swega em klin."

It continued for several moments with apparently no audible dissenters. Lexa nodded respectfully toward the crowd as her command made it back toward those in the back and "Ai swega em klin" continued to be heard.

"And now to our celebration."

There were more applause and after a few moments, the crowd started to disband. Lexa pulled Clarke off toward the side of the stage and down the stairs. She pulled her behind the stage wall where several guards were preventing people from going and Clarke was caught completely off guard when Lexa's lips were on hers. It only took her a moment before Clarke responded; deepening the kiss immediately. After several moments, Lexa pulled away and rested her forehead against Clarke's.

"I like the way your ceremony ended better than this one." She smiled.

Clarke was still breathing rapidly as she laughed at her and ran her hands up and down Lexa's bare arms.

"I can't believe you did that." Clarke replied.

"Kissed you?" Lexa pulled back.

"No, had them all swear to treat me as a Commander."

Lexa looked confused.

"Clarke, you are my equal in all things. Now that we are one, you are to be treated that way by everyone. That is one of the meanings of this ceremony. The people understood that. They gave their vow willingly because they know of your wisdom, compassion and strength." She referenced the 3 pillars of the Commanders. "Do you remember when I had Aden vow to protect you after my death if he was chosen as Heda?"

Clarke sighed.

"We were doing so well. Years had gone by without you talking about your death, Lexa." Clarke teased.

"Do you remember?" Lexa smiled and put her hands on Clarke's neck and then ran them around to her back.

"Of course."  
"I asked that of all the Nightbloods; not just Aden. If any of them would have been chosen as Commander, they would have protected your people. They would have seen you as I see you." Lexa began and Clarke lifted an eyebrow. "Well, maybe not exactly as I see you." Lexa continued. "No one sees you as I see you."

"I know."

"With our ceremony complete, if something should happen to me, Clarke, you would be Heda." She paused. "I don't intend on anything happening to me for a very long time." She explained as she saw Clarke's eyes reflect concern. "You could decide to pass the flame to someone else if you choose not to be Heda. It has never been done before, but neither has this."

"Can we talk about something else?" Clarke asked.

"We should join the people. We should see your work and celebrate for a moment before we go home."

"Home?" Clarke thought about the house Lexa had built for them.

"Yes, Clarke. Home. Our home." Lexa leaned in and kissed her again before she pulled away, took Clarke by their non-bandaged hands and walked in the direction of the crowd with a few guards around them just to protect them from people who were already drunk and partying too hard. Clarke heard several "Congratulations" in both English and Trigedasleng. She even heard the plural for Heda, which she wasn't sure she'd ever heard before, but that was most likely because it wasn't needed before today.

"Clarke?" It was Abby. She approached with Raven. They each hugged both girls and then Abby pulled something from her pocket. "Please take those off and put these on. They're sterile." Abby handed Clarke and Lexa large Band-Aids and Clarke laughed as she took it. "I know those are ceremonial, but these will actually do something to prevent infection."

"Mom, do you carry these around with you all the time?"

"I'm a doctor and a mother, Clarke. Of course, I do." Abby replied and helped Clarke with the bandage. She looked over and watched as Lexa put her own on. "You'll find out if you two ever decide to have kids one day. These come in handy."

Clarke lifted her eyebrow again at that comment. She looked over at Lexa who looked more confused than she'd possibly ever seen her.

"We're going to go look at the mural." Clarke took Lexa's hand and pulled on it.

"Congratulations!" Abby repeated and walked off toward Kane who was talking to Indra.

"I cannot believe she just brought up you two having kids." Raven brought up.

"I know. I don't think she meant it like that though." Clarke responded.

"Well, I'll leave you two alone. I just wanted to say congrats again."

"Raven?"

"Yeah?" Raven replied.

"Someone's waiting for you." Clarke pointed out and motioned with her head toward Wick who was standing off to the side.

"I know. We're going to talk." She smiled. "It's been a while. We'll see how it goes." Raven walked off with Clarke wishing her good luck.

They walked toward the old shrine that was now a museum. The crowd continued to part as they did and offer congratulations as well. Clarke could tell Lexa was uncomfortable; not with the attention. She was used to that. Clarke let go of Lexa's hand, which caused the girl to turn and wonder what was going on. Clarke turned to one of the guards.

"Can I borrow that please?" She asked with a motion toward his hip. He nodded toward her and undid his belt and handed it to her. "Here." Clarke passed it to Lexa. "Just put this on."

Lexa smiled at her.

"I will look ridiculous."

"My guess is that you feel ridiculous right now. I'll leave it up to you whether you want to look or feel that way."

Lexa took the belt from Clarke, paused for a moment and attached it to her hip over her dress. The sword now dangled at her side and she placed her hand on its handle; feeling more comfortable immediately.

"Thank you." Lexa replied slightly embarrassed at her desire to still wear a sword on her body. Despite peace, she always preached being prepared.

Before Clarke could reply, she noticed something. Someone. Someone she hadn't seen in years. Someone she never thought she'd see again. She stopped walking and caught his eye as he lowered his hood temporarily so as to confirm to her that she was seeing him. He then put his hood back up and stood steadfast in his spot just outside the room where there were people gathered in a line to see the space.

"Lexa…"

"What is it?" Lexa looked over at her and then followed her eye line. The sword she'd just attached to her hip was quickly removed. She said nothing to her guards or Clarke before moving quickly toward the hooded man. She pushed through the crowd as she demanded they part. People moved more out of confusion than for any other reason. Clarke ran quickly behind her and watched as the man knelt on the ground before Lexa got to him. She quickly pulled her sword from right to left and aimed it at his neck.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24:

"Lexa!" Clarke shouted.

The sword stopped about an inch before it would have hit skin. Clarke arrived at her side as did her guards; immediately surrounding him with their swords drawn.

"You are lucky blood must not have blood is our way now, Titus." Lexa delivered; anger dripping from her tone. "You were instructed to leave my lands and never return."

"Heda, I have risked my life to bring you something. Something I believe will be of great value to you."

"You have nothing of value to me." Lexa continued to hold the sword to his neck.

Clarke moved to put her hand over Lexa's on the sword.

"Your guards…" She paused and then leaned in to whisper in her ear so no one else could hear. "Lexa, you can put that down. He's not going anywhere."

"You have nothing of value to me." Lexa repeated to Titus and lowered her sword, but did not put it away.

"Heda, please follow me. I assure you this is no trick. I seek nothing from you; only to deliver something to you. I will leave after if that is your wish. I swear to you."

"I wish for you to leave now. I will have guards escort you."

"Am I really a Commander?" Clarke again asked Lexa in a low voice so no one else could hear.

"Clarke, this is-"  
"Am I?" Clarke repeated. Lexa looked at her. The coldness of the Commander's face was immediately softened when coming face to face with Clarke and she nodded in the affirmative.

"Titus, stand." Clarke commanded. Titus looked at Lexa for confirmation.

"Much has changed since your exile, Titus. Obey Clarke's command."

Titus stood.

"What is it you have that Lexa would want?"

Titus leaned forward without taking a step and spoke in a low voice as well since people were still gathered around waiting to see what would happen.

"Luna." He basically whispered.

Clarke thought the name sounded familiar, but when she looked over at Lexa for explanation, Lexa's face read shock and surprise.

"Impossible." Lexa finally said after several moments of silence.

"It took me years, Heda, but I have found her. I have her just outside Polis."

"Lexa?" Clarke checked.

"We should speak in private. Clear the room." Lexa pointed toward the museum. One guard remained with his sword to Titus while the others began moving the crowd away from the entrance and evacuated the space. Clarke followed Lexa inside and Titus was escorted by guard. "Leave us." Lexa commanded of the guard once they were safely alone. She still held her sword in her hand and as Clarke looked down at it, she could see Lexa's white knuckles gripping it hard. It was taking everything in the girl to not kill Titus on the spot. Clarke had long ago gotten over what had happened that day, but she hadn't been in Lexa's shoes. Lexa had to watch her get shot and nearly die. Clarke assumed that if the positions had been reversed and Lexa had gotten shot, she'd be gripping the sword the same way right now as she glared at the man responsible.

"Titus, who is Luna?" Clarke finally asked.

Titus was looking around the room. He appeared the be examining the changes since he'd been Flamekeeper.

"Titus, I have no patience for your delays." Lexa seethed. "Ron ai ridiyo op." Speak true. "Do you have Luna or not?"

"She is not a prisoner, Heda. When she fled, I sent someone to follow her. They lost her, but they spoke of the direction she rode off. I knew you sought no action against her so I spoke nothing of it. When I was banished, I was lost at first, but then I found a purpose." He paused and looked around again. "You have done it, Heda. You have achieved the peace that I doubted possible. I returned to Polis in secret and observed it for myself. When I left again, my purpose was renewed and I sought to find Luna to return her to you believing her to be safe in these new times."

"Lexa, who is Luna?" Clarke asked her again.

Lexa turned away from Titus, but pointed her sword at him to keep him back just in case.

"Luna was the 8th Nightblood at my conclave." Lexa explained. "She fled before…"

"Before you could kill her?"

"Before either of us could kill the other. She did not want to risk it."

"Lexa, was Luna… I know about Costia, but was Luna…" She faded. She wasn't sure what she wanted Lexa's answer to be.

"Luna was my sister." Lexa finally answered.

"Luna is Lexa's twin." Titus added. "Both Nightbloods therefore both eligible to be chosen by the spirit to be Commander."

"Guard!" Lexa called and the guard returned. "Take him. I need to speak to Clarke in private. Lock him away."

"Heda, I-"

"Titus, I will find you after I speak with my wife. If Luna wishes to see me, she will not flee again."

Titus nodded and walked off with the guard until Clarke and Lexa were alone in the room.

"Lexa?"

"Clarke-"

"How did you never tell me you have a sister? I've asked you about your conclave. You never want to talk about it."

"And now you understand why." Lexa answered her. "Clarke, when you are born a Nightblood, there is nothing more for you. You are either Commander or you are dead. That was our way. That still is our way. You are the first Commander that has not been a Nightblood in the history of our people and that just happened today."

Clarke calmed down a little, but not entirely.

"Tell me. Please." She stood a few steps away from Lexa. Lexa recognized her distance and put her sword away. She undid the belt and tossed it to the floor before taking a step toward Clarke.

"Luna was born first. They were not expecting me to come out later." Lexa began her story. "We were the first set of twins to be born Nightbloods as far back as anyone knew. They trained us both. We learned from the former Commander. We never talked about what would happen in the next conclave. Neither of us wanted too, but I especially…"

"Why you especially?" Clarke asked and took a step toward her.

"Because I was stronger. I would have killed her." She paused at the thought and turned her eyes to the floor. "She was older and protective of me, but I was stronger in combat, in our lessons. I was the one people believed would ascend."

"What happened?"

"When the Commander died, we were to begin the conclave. She fled to protect me."

"To protect herself."

"No, Clarke." Lexa corrected. "She knew I could not have survived knowing I had killed my sister. Despite all my talk of love being weakness, she was my sister. She knew I would not be the Commander my people needed if I had to take her life. She left so I did not have to make that choice."

Clarke slid her arms around Lexa's waist.

"You should have told me this."

"Why dwell in the past? She has been gone all these years. I thought her dead."

"She's not. Titus found her. You can see her. Lexa, look at me." Clarke begged. Lexa lifted her head. "You have a chance to see your sister again."

"And what if Titus is lying?"

"Why would he risk his life to see you if he couldn't deliver her?"

"Clarke, I'm scared."

Clarke had never heard Lexa utter those words or speak of fear in anyway other than you shouldn't be afraid of anything.

"Oh, Lexa." She pulled her in and hugged her.

"I would have killed her." Lexa told Clarke's shoulder. "How do I face her knowing that?"

"How do you know you would have done that? Maybe you wouldn't have. Maybe things would have been different."

Lexa pulled away from the hug.

"That's not how it worked, Clarke."

"What should I say, Lexa? I just found out you have a sister. I'm your wife now. We've been together all this time and I never knew."

"You're angry." Lexa stated and pulled away from Clarke's arms.

Clarke took a breath.

"We can deal with how I feel about all this later. Right now, we should talk to Titus and find out where she is. I doubt she'll wait forever." Clarke thought about it. "Why didn't she just come into Polis with him?"

"It would have been difficult. She's my twin, Clarke."

"That's going to take some getting used too."

"We'll see." Lexa began walking out of the room; leaving Clarke behind. She picked up the belt, but didn't put it on. She just held it at her side until they were both out of the room. She handed it to a guard and then they walked back to the building they'd called home for four years now. People seemed to be back in a celebratory mood and had forgotten about what had just happened.

"Heda, I saw Titus. Why is he not dead?" Indra asked. Lexa did not respond. "Heda?"

"Indra, Titus will be dealt with. Leave us." It was Clarke who commanded it. It took Indra a moment to understand that Clarke had issued an order as they continued walking with speed. Clarke was in no mood to explain anything right now and as her eyes connected with Indra's, she knew the woman understood her. She stopped walking as they continued on.

_____

They arrived back at their room, which Clarke had wondered if she should call it their old room now that they had a house to call their own.

"Why are we in here, Lexa? Shouldn't we be downstairs? Don't you want to send for Titus?" Clarke asked as she watched Lexa pace.

"I should change." Lexa said more to herself than to Clarke.

"All our stuff is at the house."

"I left some things here." She walked over to a dresser that Clarke hadn't checked that morning. Lexa began pulling out her Commander black gear.

"Lexa, talk to me." Clarke implored.

"You should change too." Lexa threw clothing onto their bed that Clarke recognized as her own.

"I'm not doing anything until you stop and talk to me."

"Fine." Lexa reached behind her own neck to try to undo her dress, but she was having some difficulty. "Don't change."

Clarke rolled her eyes at her stubborn wife and approached her. She reached around Lexa's neck and undid the dress with ease; moving Lexa's hands away in the process.

"How did you even get this thing on?" Clarke lightened the mood.

"Clarke…"

The dress fell to the floor and Clarke took a moment to just appreciate the sight in front of her.

"I know you're nervous about seeing her. I know that's why you're acting this way. I will forgive you for being rude to me on our wedding night."

That got a small smile from her.

"I'm sorry."

Clarke moved to take a shirt from Lexa and helped her put it on. She watched as Lexa slid pants on her legs and Clarke immediately missed the dress she was wearing.

"You're always so calm. I've never seen you like this before. I'm trying to figure out what to do."

"So am I." Lexa admitted. "I don't know what to do either, Clarke. I thought she was dead. I didn't think she could survive out there on her own. I suppose if she found somewhere within the clan lands to hide. Maybe someone took her in. Maybe she found a way to survive out there alone as you did years ago. Maybe-"

"Maybe it's time you find out what happened for yourself." Clarke interrupted. "Lexa, I love you. You can handle this. Go see your sister. Decide what you want to do after that."

"You should change. I don't want you to dirty that dress. I'd like you to wear it again someday."

"You want me to go with you?"

"You sound surprised." Lexa was surprised herself at Clarke's confusion.

"You two should be alone to talk. Have Titus take you to her and then banish him again or keep him away or-"  
"Clarke, I need you there." Lexa confessed. "I don't think I can do it without you."

Clarke nodded. She reached for her clothes and as she turned, she felt Lexa's hands begin to help her out of her dress.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25:

"Titus, if you are lying to me-"

"Heda, I swear to you, I am not lying to you. I would not lie to you." Titus defended as they rode on horseback toward the location outside of the city.

"You lied by omission when you failed to tell me you had captured Murphy and planned to murder Clarke." Lexa retorted.

"We don't need to bring that up again." Clarke interjected.

"If Titus wants to make an incorrect statement, I will argue it." Lexa kept her eyes locked on Titus who was bound on his horse and was actually being pulled by one of the guards that accompanied them.

The group settled into an awkward silence for the remainder of the ride, which took them well into the night. The guards that were on foot carried torches to light their way, but Clarke was regretting the need for immediate action like this. They'd technically gotten married the night before, but this was still very much their wedding day and after she stayed up all night with Lexa and riding to the house, getting ready for the celebration and ceremony today, she was exhausted. The only thing keeping her going was the fact that she knew Lexa needed her with her. She'd do anything for her.

"She is there, Heda." Titus had to motion with both of his hands since they were tied together. "Inside." There was a small one-room shack more than a house set back in a grouping of trees. "I built it myself." He finished.

"It looks like there's a light or a lamp on inside." Clarke commented. She could see a sliver of light emanating from the crack in the door. She turned toward Lexa, who'd chosen to wear full Commander gear including the war paint she so rarely needed these days. "Lexa?" Clarke checked on her. She hadn't said anything in a long time and appeared to just be staring at the shack.

"Heda, we should check-" One of the guards started.

"Yes. Go." Lexa ordered and two of the guards walked with their torches and swords at their sides toward the small building.

"Do you really think it's a trap?" Clarke asked her.

"I trusted Titus once. I won't make the same mistake again." Lexa replied well within earshot of Titus who hung his head.

They watched as the guards approached cautiously. They inspected the surrounding area and then walked toward the door. One drew his sword while the other had his hand on his and knocked on the wooden door. Clarke looked at Lexa who gulped when the door opened. They couldn't see who it was, but the guards turned back a moment later and nodded.

Lexa suddenly became quick in her movements where she had so recently seemed so hesitant. She climbed from her horse and Clarke watched as she took several large steps forward at a face pace. Then, she stopped suddenly and stood still. Clarke knew. She climbed off her own horse and just as her footsteps approached Lexa, Lexa reached her right hand out to her side. Clarke slid her own into it and they walked forward together toward the building. The door was still open and there was light streaming outside now.

When Lexa made eye contact with her, she stopped walking. Clarke felt Lexa's body tense. She looked at Lexa and then toward the house and couldn't believe what she was seeing. Luna was dressed in tattered clothing, but other than that, she looked just like Lexa. Her hair was slightly shorter, but the same color. Her eye color, her bone structure, her height… everything. Clarke turned to look at Lexa as if to check that she was still there. Lexa's mouth hung open.

"Sister." Came a greeting from the shack. Luna's voice was similar to Lexa's, but slightly higher.

"It's you." Lexa replied.

"Yes, Lexa." Luna took a few steps outside. Lexa remained in her position. Her hand had grown sweaty inside Clarke's. "My apologies. Yes, Commander." She lowered her head.

Lexa let go of Clarke's hand and ran to her sister. Clarke watched as she lifted Luna's head and held it in place.

"No, I am your sister."

Clarke watched as the two of them embraced. She turned back to see that Titus was smiling on his horse and the guards appeared to be doing their job without invading Lexa's privacy by imposing their presence.

"The two of you take him back." Clarke ordered the guards quietly enough so as not to disturb Lexa and Luna's reunion. "Lexa and I will remain here."

"I will stay behind." One guard offered. Clarke nodded.

"Lock him away until the Commander decides what to do with him."

"What happens to me does not matter." Titus stated as his horse was turned to walk back toward Polis. His head remained turned for as long as he could hold it that way as he watched the sisters embrace and talk.

The guard who remained behind took watch by facing the other direction. Clarke appreciated his respect for Lexa. She turned back around to see that Lexa and Luna were no longer hugging, but were talking. She stood there for several minutes watching them and trying to both listen and not listen at the same time. Lexa turned around and smiled at Clarke after what felt like an eternity to her. She nodded for Clarke to approach, which Clarke did.

"Luna, this is Clarke."

"It's nice to meet you." Clarke greeted.

"And you." Luna replied.

"Clarke is my wife."

Luna's expression changed immediately. She was clearly thrown off by this.

"But you are Commander."  
"Titus was not lying to you when he told you things with our people have changed." Lexa explained. "Clarke and I have been together for a long time. We married today in Polis."

Clarke didn't know what to say or do. She figured Lexa would let her know what she needed and she'd do that.

"How is that possible?" Luna asked.

"Come back with us. Come to Polis."

"I cannot return to Polis, Lexa. I fled the conclave. I am a coward to our people. I should be dead."

"Things have changed, Luna. Let me show you." Lexa implored. "You don't have to hide anymore."

"I can't return to the city, Lexa. We can talk here or in the woods for now. Titus found me at great risk to himself. I nearly killed him when I found him following me."

"What about outside the city?" Clarke interjected.

"We are outside the city." Luna replied.

"We have a house. It's outside of Polis, but it's closer than this. It's private and it's not in the city. You don't have to worry."

"You have a house?" Luna looked at Lexa.

"Everything is different now. Clarke is right. You can stay at our house so we can talk. It's a short ride from here. Please, Luna."

"You arrested Titus." Luna shared. "Why did you arrest him if he brought you to me?" Luna appeared to not trust her sister telling her that things have changed.

"Titus committed an offense. He was banished for it. He returned against my orders and was arrested. His punishment for that has yet to be determined."

"He should be freed." Luna tried.

"Titus is not my concern right now."

"Promise me that you will let him go and I will come with you."

"Why is his safety so important to you?" Lexa asked.

"Because after I nearly killed him and he explained what happened in Polis, I got caught in a hunter's trap. It almost severed my leg. Titus removed it and tended to the wound until it healed. He saved my life. I would like to offer the same to him in return now."  
"His life is not at risk." Clarke reminded. "We don't kill people anymore."

"Heda, swega em kiln." Commander, swear it.

"Titus will live. I have no intention of taking his life."

"And he will be freed?"

"Yes." Clarke answered for Lexa.

"I need the Commander to say it."  
"She just did." Lexa replied for Clarke this time. "We have been bound in blood and flame. Clarke is a Commander now as I am, Luna."

"Ron ai ridiyo op!" Speak true! This was the most shocked Clarke had seen Luna.

"We can talk about this at the house. She has made her promise. Will you come with us?" Clarke asked Luna.

Luna thought about it while staring at her sister. Clarke noticed they both had the same stubborn streak, but while their eye color was the same, there was something about their eyes that was different too. It wasn't something that could necessarily be quantified, but Clarke knew that despite the fact that they appeared to be identical, they weren't really. Lexa's eyes were the only eyes that held everything Clarke needed in them.

"I will come with you." Luna finally replied reluctantly.

_____

It appeared that both sisters got the stoic silence gene because while Clarke had hoped Luna would fill Lexa in on her years in hiding and Lexa would fill Luna in on the changes in Polaris since she'd fled the conclave, neither of them spoke a single word the entire ride back to the house. Clarke realized when they arrived that this place was not supported like their room in Polis. There were no brightly lit torches or candles illuminating the house and greeting them upon their arrival. This was truly their house. They would have to manage the basic upkeep of it on their own. Clarke knew that if Lexa commanded someone manage it for them, they would and there would undoubtedly be people that helped them, but Clarke kind of enjoyed the idea that this place belonged to them entirely.

She reentered the present moment as Lexa and Luna climbed off of their horses in unison. The guard had walked back alongside them; giving Luna his horse for the ride. He took the reins of their horses and moved to tie them up while Clarke climbed down herself. Luna had brought a small bag of belongings with her, but Clarke guessed that might be all she owns in the world.

The three of them made their way in silence toward the house. It was nearing dawn and Clarke could not seem to keep her eyes open for very long. All she wanted was to climb into a bed and fall asleep for several hours, but she wasn't sure how likely that was at this point given their new arrival. She realized she might have gotten used to peace and consistently sleeping the night through.

She was grateful Lexa had the house fitted for electricity. Although they couldn't keep it on for too long each day as the grid was rather limited while the engineers continue their work on expanding it and finding reliable fuel sources.

Lexa entered first and turned on a light switch to the right illuminating two small light bulbs overhead. It wasn't enough light to really show off the whole space, but it was enough to give them their bearings. Clarke followed behind her and turned to see Luna hesitate before entering the house after her.

"I'll light some candles." Clarke offered.

"Supplies are in the kitchen." Lexa instructed as she recalled that Clarke hadn't yet really explored the supplies she'd had stocked here. She'd hoped for a very different night in their new house, but Lexa also couldn't help but feel somewhat happier that Luna was alive and with her after all this time.

Clarke looked toward Luna who had closed the door behind them before walking toward the kitchen to retrieve what she needed to begin lighting the candles. While the house was certainly larger than most she'd seen, it was still small enough to where she could hear if they were talking from the other room. She silently moved around trying to pick up anything they might be saying, but was surprised and yet not so to hear nothing coming from the siblings. She lit a few candles in the kitchen and then moved to the living room where she could see the two of them standing facing one another, but not speaking.

"I just realized we only have one bed." Clarke pointed out. She'd gotten used to Polis having several bedrooms for people to sleep in.

"I'll sleep down here." Luna told her without turning from Lexa.

"You should take the bed. Lexa and I-"

"I will sleep down here." Luna repeated and finally looked toward Clarke. "I haven't slept in a bed in a very long time."

Lexa looked at the floor for a moment.

"Lexa, are there blankets here?" Clarke asked her wife.

"I'll get them." Lexa replied. She seemed glad to have an excuse to walk off somewhere.

Clarke lit a section of candles near the small sofa that sat in their new living room. It had a few pieces of modest furniture, but nothing fancy.

"Titus tells me you come from the sky." Luna moved toward Clarke.

"I did, yes. We've been down here for years though now." Clarke finished lighting the candles.

"The Flamekeeper told me stories while I was healing, but he'd been banished so he could only speak of-"

"Clarke is our Flamekeeper now." Lexa returned to the room. She laid two thin blankets on the sofa along with a small feather pillow.

"Clarke is many things." Luna stood between them before taking a few steps to the sofa and sitting on it.

"Yes, she is." Lexa replied.

There was clear tension between the sisters and Clarke had no idea how to address it. She was still trying to get over the fact that Lexa had a sister and that she looked just like her.

"How is it that she is both Heda and Fleimkepa, Commander?" Luna asked Lexa.

"That is a story for another time." Lexa told her.

"Maybe I should go upstairs and give you two time to talk." Clarke offered and began walking toward the stairs.

"No more talking tonight." Luna shared and began pulling at the blankets. "I'd like to sleep now."

"Very well. We will leave you alone." Lexa agreed and walked toward the stairs. "Clarke?"

"I'll meet you up there. I'm going to grab some food from the kitchen. Luna, are you hungry?" She asked the girl who was now lying down with her eyes closed.

"I am not."

Clarke looked toward Lexa who nodded toward the kitchen and they both walked in that direction.

"How-" Clarke began.

Lexa put a finger over Clarke's mouth and motioned with her head toward the living room. Clarke understood her. Luna could hear them. They moved as quietly as possible to get food for both of them and then walked out the backdoor to the backyard. The sun was just about to rise. They sat in the grass near the apple trees and ate breakfast together; which was really their dinner from the night before.

"How are you?" Clarke asked her after a bite.

"She doesn't trust me." Lexa answered after a moment.

"She will. She's just been gone for a long time, Lexa. She doesn't understand."

"She thinks I found her to kill her."

"What?" Clarke looked at her. "Why would she think that?"

"Because she should have died at the conclave. She believes I want to kill her now to keep her from trying to take the throne from me."

"You wouldn't do that."

"Clarke, her return could cause problems. It may make people skeptical and even a small amount of doubt can be enough to cause worry."

"You said they branded her a coward."

"They did, but a lot of time has passed since then. Many of those people around back then are now gone. Dead in battle or are no longer in positions of authority if they still live."

"She just needs time, Lexa. We can take her to Polis in secret if you're worried. Once she sees how much has changed, she'll trust that you just want your sister back."

"She may not be the sister I knew, Clarke. She's been out of the world a long time now. She may not be able to be saved." Lexa finally looked at Clarke.

"Everyone can be saved, Lexa." Clarke reminded her and put her hand on Lexa's cheek; turning toward her at the same time. "Listen to me. Whatever you decide to do, I am with you. You are the wisest person I know, Lexa kom Trikru. If she has half the wisdom you have, she will know that you won't hurt her. She'll learn that you're the right person to lead these people. She just needs time to see that and you need to listen to her."

"I was listening. She didn't say anything."

Clarke laughed at that comment.

"Maybe try changing your clothes the next time you go to talk to her. You can be a little intimidating dressed like this." Clarke pointed out and ran her finger along Lexa's black war paint and then showing it to her. Lexa smiled. "At least leave the sword." Clarke continued. Lexa's sword was lying next to them in the grass.

"I am sorry about how this night went. It was not what I expected for our first night here." Lexa took a bite of her food and looked at the sun, which was now lighting up the sky in its morning hues.

"We'll have many nights here. I'm not worried."

"Are you angry?" Lexa kept looking forward.

"I am tired." Clarke admitted. "I am very tired and still in shock that there's someone else that looks like you out there that I never knew about."

"I understand." Lexa sounded defeated.

"But I am not angry, Lexa." Clarke continued. "I wished you would have told me, but I know you. I've always known you. You're not usually the person who pours her heart out to the world and even with me, you sometimes take some prodding." Clarke took Lexa's free hand as it rested in the grass. "But I love you and I'm with you while you figure this out."

"You should sleep." Lexa squeezed Clarke's hand.

"We should sleep." Clarke emphasized.

Lexa nodded, but seemed to have something rolling around in her mind.

They walked past the living room after putting their remaining food away in the kitchen and saw a sleeping Luna on the sofa wrapped in blankets and head resting against the pillow. They walked up the stairs and readied themselves for bed. Clarke climbed in first with Lexa following shortly after. Clarke rolled on her side to face Lexa and Lexa turned her head to look at Clarke.

"You're not going to sleep, are you?" Clarke asked her.

"I can't." Lexa admitted. "I will be here though. Sleep." She rolled on her side toward Clarke and placed her hand on Clarke's cheek. "I love you more than anything." Lexa leaned in and kissed Clarke gently. She knew the girl was exhausted and honestly, she was too, but she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. Clarke reciprocated as much as her energy level would allow and then rolled over on her other side. Lexa knew what that meant and she wrapped her arms around the blonde. She pulled her back into her and rested her head on her shoulder.

"I love you more than anything." Clarke responded in more of a whisper and soon her breathing slowed.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: In my haste to post chapters, I failed to explain that I have taken Luna in a different direction here. This version has been in hiding for years and will not be whoever the show makes her this season and while she was referenced in season 1, I decided to make her different for this story. Sorry for any confusion my lack of author's note may have caused.

Chapter 26:

Lexa's eyes remained open. She held tightly onto Clarke for over an hour as she felt the sunlight begin to enter the room; warming their space almost too much. She tried to pull away from Clarke as slowly as possible and stood. She watched her move slightly in the bed, but continued sleeping. She went to the window and drew the dark curtains to cover most of the light. She looked back to her wife who appeared to be sleeping soundly still and walked out of the room, down the stairs. She looked to the right and the living room and saw blankets and a pillow, but no Luna. She walked to the kitchen thinking she'd been hungry, but she was not there. She went to the back door and opened it. She noticed the guard they'd arrived with sleeping against a tree. They'd forgotten to make him sleeping arrangements, but he was a guard. This was something he'd undoubtedly gotten used too. Luna was standing under one of the apple trees. She pulled one down and wiped at it with her sleeve before taking a bite.

"We have food inside." Lexa finally spoke. Luna turned to look at her.

"You seem to have a lot." Luna replied before taking another bite and turning toward Lexa.

"I thought you'd left."

"And did that make you happy or sad?" Luna asked her.

"You are my sister, Luna. I thought you dead. I am happy to find out that that is not the case."

"Is that why you failed to seek me out after you made all these changes you say you've made?"

Lexa took a step toward her.

"Yes." Lexa paused and took another intentional step. "Luna, I wish you no harm. If you want to join us in Polaris, you may do so. If you want to leave and return to where you've been all these years, that is your decision to make." She took a deep breath as she watched Luna cross her arms over her chest; apple still in hand. "I am happy to see you. I am sad, however, at the thought that you do not trust me but despite that sadness, I do understand why that would be the case."

Luna appeared to be thinking. She took another bite of her apple.

"I assume your wife is still sleeping." She emphasized the word wife. "Yet, I wonder. Did you fall asleep as well or did you remain awake as I did?"

"Why does that matter?"

"Because it seems it's not just I that does not trust you, but you that does not trust me as well."

Lexa nodded.

"We have much to learn about one another. I would like us to try to do that, sister."

"You first." Luna replied.

"Will you come back inside?" Lexa asked her.

"I like it better out here." Luna answered. "I'm more comfortable outside these days."

"Where should I start?" Lexa offered.

"Start with your wife, Commander."

Lexa couldn't help but smile. Luna had always been her older sister. Even when they were first in training with the other Nightbloods, she had a way of ordering Lexa around and Lexa had a way of wanting to follow her. As the training went on, however, Luna's influence on her seemed to diminish as the other trainees began to trust in Lexa and follow her instead. Lexa's confidence grew and Luna began to pull away from her sister and the other Nightbloods.

"For me to start there would require me to go back to the beginning or nearly the beginning."

Luna and Lexa both heard it at the same time. It was the sound of arriving horses thundering toward the front of the house.

"Did you lie to me? Are they here to take me captive?"

"No." Lexa replied. She reached for her sword, but realized it wasn't there. She'd left it upstairs. "Hide in the trees. I'll see who it is."

The guard woke up and rushed toward the Commander.

"Heda!"

"Luna, go. Stay hidden until I call for you." Lexa told her.

"Sha, Heda." Luna replied somewhat sarcastically, but jogged toward the tree line.

Lexa and her guard walked through the house toward the front. They remained out of the sight of the windows until Lexa could slide up next to one and take the riders into view.

"Em klir." Lexa told her guard. All clear. She walked toward the front door and allowed him to open it for her.

She watched Indra climb off her horse first. She was followed quickly by Lincoln and Octavia and several guards and soldiers behind them.

"Heda, you are alright?" Indra asked as Lexa walked outside.

"We are fine. Why did you come here, Indra?"

"I saw Titus returned to his cell and went to look for you, but could not find you. We knew you had intended to stay here for the night, but wanted to ensure your safety after the arrival of the former Flamekeeper."

"Where's Clarke?" Octavia asked.

"She's sleeping." Lexa replied.

"Not anymore." Clarke walked outside. She rubbed one of her eyes. "What are you guys doing here?" She asked and evened herself with Lexa.

"Checking on you. We saw Titus and wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Has Titus spoken about why he's here with anyone?" Lexa asked them.

"He has not spoken at all, Heda. Perhaps he fears I will tear out his tongue." Indra returned.

"He is to be freed, Indra. See to it upon your return. No harm should come to him."

"Heda, he disobeyed your order and returned from exile!"

"See to it, Indra." Lexa commanded.

"Sha, Heda." Indra replied.

"He may remain in one of my rooms until I return. If he chooses to leave Polis of his own accord, he should not be stopped though."

"Understood." Indra relayed reluctantly.

"We should go if you two are okay." Octavia pointed out and climbed back on her horse.

"Take him with you. We don't need a guard." Lexa pointed at the guard who had remained with them.

"Heda, I recommend you keep at least one guard at all times." Lincoln spoke up.

"I am Commander. I can protect myself and my family."

Clarke looked at her. She'd never heard Lexa refer to her as her family before, but she wondered if she'd be calling her that if Luna wasn't there. Maybe she was only referring to Luna after all.

"We'll be fine." Clarke told Lincoln. "We'll probably be heading back to Polis soon. We have a phone if we need anything or if you need to get a hold of us."  
"They have a phone?!" Octavia questioned Indra. "We could have just called them."

"And what would that have done, Octavia? If there had been real danger, a phone call would have only delayed us." Indra retorted.

"Gon we." Lexa said. Leave.

"She meant that nicely." Clarke added.

Octavia and Lincoln turned their horses around.  
"We must have interrupted them having sex. Probably why they're so uptight." Clarke heard Octavia mutter. It caused her to laugh.

She felt Lexa's hand on her back and turned to her.

"I'm sorry they woke you." Lexa told her.

"It's okay. Where's Luna?" Clarke kissed Lexa good morning briefly.

"She's out back. I asked her to hide in case they were intruders. Would you mind going back inside?" Lexa hated asking her. "I think she'll be more likely to talk to me if we're alone."

"Maybe I should just go back to Polis. I can make sure people leave you alone out here." Clarke offered.

"I know I shouldn't ask you to stay and not be a part of it. I should tell you to return, but…" Lexa faded as her arms wrapped around Clarke's neck.

"You can ask me to stay, Lexa. I'm your wife. I'll stay or go. It's up to you."

"Please stay." Lexa leaned in and pecked Clarke's lips. Clarke smiled.

"I told you I'd stay. You don't have to bribe me with a kiss, Lexa." She joked. It worked and she got Lexa to smile.

Lexa leaned back in and kissed her for real this time. Their lips moved together as Clarke's arms wrapped around her body. She pulled her in closer as Lexa's tongue sought her own. They heard a throat clear and pulled apart quickly. Luna was standing at the open front door of the house.

"Luna, would you care to go for a walk?" Lexa asked when she regained her composure.

"Will Clarke be joining us?" Luna asked back.

"I'm going inside." Clarke replied for Lexa. "I'll make some breakfast for when you get back." She offered. Lexa nodded. "I love you." Clarke didn't say the last thing out loud. She mouthed it in Lexa's direction as Luna approached and Clarke backed away toward the door. Lexa smirked back and then quickly turned serious again when Luna got to her side.

The two of them began walking toward the woods. They were both silent at first. It was as if they were competing for who could be silent the longest; for who could reveal the least of themselves to the other.

"Why don't you start with what happened to Costia?" Luna spoke up as she pulled a leaf off of a tree. Lexa had not been prepared for that. "Titus, told me she was killed by Azgeda."

"Then, you know what happened. Why do you ask that?"

"Because you loved her before I left and now you are married to someone else."

Lexa stopped walking.

"Before you left, things were different. Costia did not yet know of my feelings for her. After the conclave, when I became Commander, she professed to me that she felt the same way I did and I thought I could be with her and be the Commander." Lexa paused and took a breath. "I was wrong."

"And how is this different?"

Lexa turned to her.

"Costia's death will always be my fault. I will bear the shame of my mistake until my death. I won't deny my feelings for Costia, but Clarke is different." She paused. "Even if Costia had lived, I know beyond all doubt that Clarke is the one I was meant to be with. She and I were fated."

Luna appeared to be appeased for the moment.

"When I left…" She started and stared at the leaf she still held. "I had no idea where I would go. I ran to father first."

"You ran to father?" Lexa seemed surprised.

"He would not help me. He said I've brought shame on our family by running and that he'd rather one or both of us die in the conclave than flee to save the other. Mother cried, but she took his side. I do not blame her. You know how he could be. Father went to turn me in, but I ran and stole a horse and rode off into the woods. I kept riding until my horse could go no longer and then I walked until I could go no further. I believe it was three days before I finally stopped. I worried they'd be close behind me." She paused and threw the leaf to the ground. "I saw the smoke and knew you were the new Commander. You had always been the best of us."

"They went after you, but when I ascended I stopped them. We were in the middle of a war with Ice Nation. I convinced them that was more important than finding you." Lexa looked down.

"What happened to them?" Luna asked her. "After I left?"

"Mother died of illness. The healers could not save her." Lexa explained.

"And father?"

"He died in battle shortly after."

"I've been wandering ever since." Luna continued. "It would be easier if we didn't look the same. I've had to hide my face and flee if I thought someone made the connection."

"There were rumors at first. Sightings of you. I sent a party of warriors I could trust, but you were always gone." She sighed. "And then there were no more rumors and I worried you had met death."

"I nearly did. Many times." Luna paused. "I thought of returning to Polis. Rumors did reach me of some of the changes. I heard of Skaikru and the name Wanheda and the mountain."

Lexa started walking again.

"Clarke was Wanheda."

Luna looked surprised as she walked beside her sister.

"Clarke was the Commander of Death? She was the one that destroyed the mountain?"  
"Yes."

"She really is many things." Luna repeated her earlier phrase.

"Clarke is the reason for all of this, Luna." She stopped to look at her sister. "Many people credit me, but when I met Clarke, I knew. I saw her and I knew she was different. I knew she was special and she trusted me when she had no reason to do so. Her people had only seen blood and death from mine, but she believed in me as I believed in her. She saw something in me than no one else did. She saw a future that I longed for, but thought impossible until I met her. We weren't always on the same side of things and I made mistakes, but she let me back in and we fell in love. It has always been more than that though. We've ruled side by side. She makes me a better Commander. Each decision I've made these past four years has at least in part involved her or has been because of her. She has led our people to peace, Luna."

Luna took a moment to consider everything Lexa had just revealed to her.

"Perhaps then we should join her for breakfast." She replied. Lexa smiled. "Do you remember before the conclave? I would try to make you smile with a joke and you would tell me…"

"Smiling is weakness."

"You'd repeat it and then you'd remind me that love is weakness." Luna began walking back toward the house. "Much has changed after all, little sister."


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27:

They entered through the back door to Clarke's surprise.

"I may have overstated my ability to make breakfast." She looked at Lexa. "We don't exactly have food to cook here and I also don't really cook." In Polis, Clarke and Lexa had people who cooked for them.

Lexa laughed at her silently as she closed the door behind Luna.

"I could make us something." Luna offered. "Give me some time to find us something out there."

"Oh, you don't-"

"I'd like too." Luna interjected and opened the door. "I saw some weapons outside."

"Take what you need." Lexa told her. "Would you like some company?"

"I think I'd like to be alone." Luna replied and took a step into the doorway. She met Lexa's eyes and saw they appeared concerned. "I will be back."

Lexa nodded and Luna closed the door behind her. Clarke stood against the small kitchen table and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Is everything okay?" She asked her.

"We talked. We have more to do, but I think she's beginning to trust me."

"And you think she'll come back?"

"I do. She needs some time to herself. I understand."

"I guess if anyone would, it would be you."

Lexa approached her and lowered Clarke's arms to her sides; keeping her hands in her own. She brought one of them to her lips and kissed Clarke's fingers one by one.

"She will be gone for a while. I'm sure she's a good hunter, but I'm also sure she wants to be alone right now and you and I are alone right now."

"Lexa! We can't. We don't know when she'll be back."

Lexa leaned in and kissed Clarke's neck.

"I've missed you." Despite the fact that they'd been together for years and it had really only been a little over 24 hours, they rarely went this long without sex. It had always amused Clarke that both of them seemed to possess the ability to be in a meeting with ambassadors, plan their actions against Pike or Alie, or in this case, deal with Lexa's twin being back in their lives and still crave each other in this way. They'd always been each other's refuge against everything out there even before they were together, but since they're first time, this had been a welcome addition to that aspect of their relationship.

"Lexa, we can't. I want you to tell me what you talked about." Clarke resisted, but also tilted her neck to make it easier for Lexa's tongue to slide up and down.

"I promise you, I will tell you every detail, but right now… Clarke, I just want us to be us." She implored and pressed her lips to Clarke's who knew that Lexa needed her right now.

"Upstairs." Clarke said between kisses and walked backwards out of the room with Lexa still kissing her. They practically stumbled up the stairs, lips and tongues clashing until they made it to their room. Clarke pulled Lexa through it with a smile and Lexa closed the door behind them before Clarke pushed her back against it.

"I noticed I didn't have to work that hard to convince you." Lexa pointed out as Clarke began undoing Lexa's pants while attaching her lips to her neck.

"Do you want to talk now or can we continue?" Clarke fired back with a smirk against Lexa's earlobe.

Lexa didn't respond. She reached for the bottom of Clarke's shirt and began pulling it up. Once it was off, Clarke returned her lips to Lexa's neck as Lexa stepped out of her pants, trying not to trip as Clarke wouldn't release her body to do it more gracefully. Before she could try to move Clarke's lips back to her own, she felt Clarke's hand dip beneath her own shirt and rest on her abdomen, but only for a moment before it plunged beneath her panties and she gasped. Clarke pulled back for a second and Lexa took the opportunity to life her own shirt off while Clarke started to work against her.

"Have I ever told you that I love when you get like this?" Lexa teased. Their first time together that day, before Titus's actions ruined the perfection of it, had been slow. Neither of them could believe it was happening, it seemed, but Lexa even more so couldn't fathom Clarke finally returning her affections. The worry that they'd soon have to say goodbye was forgotten once Clarke had moved on top of her and after they finished and Lexa rolled on her side just to bask in the feelings of what had just occurred, she kept her mind and Clarke's mind off of the fact that they would have to say goodbye soon. However, Clarke surprised her again by telling her, after mention of the 8th Nightblood and Lexa's desire to change the subject, that they didn't have to talk at all and Lexa witnessed a smile that led her to believe that despite the fact that they would have to say goodbye after their second time together, that there would be a third time and a forth time and probably more than that in their future.

"I told you I'd be here for whatever you needed." Clarke replied as her hand kept working and her lips moved back to Lexa's while Lexa hand went around Clarke's neck.

_____

When Luna returned, she carried a small animal she'd already butchered, apples and some greens Clarke had to assume were edible. Clarke and Lexa were sitting at the table. Clarke had made them coffee. Lexa was sipping on it, but still didn't really care for it. Clarke enjoyed watching her facial expressions after trying to drink the bitter liquid. She loved all parts of Lexa, but the adorable one might be her favorite.

Clarke watched as Lexa showed Luna where she'd had cookware placed in the kitchen. They moved similarly, she noticed. At one point, Luna shoved her sister and Lexa turned quickly to return to Clarke. She had a smile on her face, but put it away when she saw Clarke was smiling back at her. She returned to her chair and watched Luna continue to prepare their breakfast, which was basically a late lunch by the time it was done and they were eating together. Luna didn't speak much. Neither did Lexa. Clarke finished eating first and sat back in her chair. She continued to dart her eyes back and forth.

"Still having a hard time with it?" Luna asked her.

"I didn't know you existed so seeing you two next to each other like this is going to take some getting used too." Clarke replied.

"Clarke, can I speak to you… in private?" Clarke had to do a double take when she realized the words came out of Luna's mouth and not Lexa's.

"Me?" Clarke checked.

"Yes."

"Anything you want to say to me, you can say in front of Lexa." Clarke explained.

"Clarke, it's okay." Lexa told her and took her hand on the table. "I'll be in our room." Lexa stood and left the room. Luna waited until she heard her take the stairs.

"I don't want to return to Polis, Clarke."

"What?" Clarke leaned forward.

"I left the first time because I love my sister. I won't return now for the same reason."

"Lexa should be down here for this, Luna."

"Please, just let me finish." She leaned forward to match Clarke's position. "When we were born, Lexa was a surprise."  
"She told me."  
"Did she also tell you how sick she was when we were young?"

"What? No." Clarke replied surprised.

"When we were small… they didn't expect her to survive. Our mother took care of her while our father was away. I helped. I'd bring her medicine and food and watch over her as she slept. As we got older, she got better. When we began our training, she'd been fully recovered for a while and it didn't take long for people to come to believe that she would ascend one day over the rest of us Nightbloods."

"And you left?"

"I did not flee because I feared my own death. I left because I believed Lexa was to be chosen by the spirit and if she had to kill me to do that…"

"I understand."

"Despite the changes in Polis, if I return to the fold, people may begin to question her. They might wonder why she has failed to kill me."

"You haven't seen it, Luna. It's not the same as when you left."

Luna nodded.

"I'd like to believe that."  
"Let me get Lexa."

"I'm not saying I'll never come back, Clarke. I came with Titus because I wanted to see my sister again and I'd still like to see her. I'd like to see what you've created there, but maybe this house is a good meeting place for now."

"Luna, you can stay here as long as you like. We can-"

"You love her." Luna stated.

"Lexa? Of course I do."

"She was right. You have changed her. I can see it." She paused. "And I am happy for it."

Clarke smiled.

"She likes to remind me sometimes that she loved me first." Clarke lifted her eyebrows.

"That in and of itself makes you special. If after everything she'd been through, she was able to love again…"  
"I think that makes her special."

"That makes her strong." Luna clarified. "I am more comfortable out there now." Luna pointed outside the window. "I have places I go. I move around when I need too, but I am safe and I am not on the run anymore. I've come to enjoy my solitude."

"What about Lexa? She just got you back?"

"I will return. She and I can speak regularly, but I am not ready to rejoin the society that not so long ago sought my death."

"Do you think you'll ever be?" Clarke asked her.

"Perhaps the more she and I talk and I learn about the new world." Luna stood.

"Wait. You're leaving now?" Clarke stood as well.

"It's better this way. Tell her I will return at the next full moon."

"Let her say goodbye, Luna."

"We didn't say goodbye last time. She will understand."

Clarke watched as Luna walked first to the living room, picked up her bag and then returned to the kitchen to open the back door.

"Luna-"

"I trust you will protect her for me." Luna turned toward Clarke after opening the door.

"Always."

Luna left the house and Clarke watched as she jogged quickly toward the woods.

"I heard the door-" Lexa moved into the kitchen. She saw Clarke standing alone. "She left."

"She said she'd be back at the next full moon."

Clarke moved toward her.

"She didn't believe me about Polaris; about the fact that we've changed."

"She did, Lexa." Clarke put her hand on the small of her back. "She just isn't ready to return yet."

"I should go after her."  
"You should leave her alone. You know that's what she wants."

Lexa looked at Clarke.

"What else did she tell you?" Lexa asked her.

"Why don't we go upstairs, change our clothes and I'll tell you everything before we fall asleep?"

"What if she doesn't come back?"

"She will. Come on. I know you're exhausted."

Clarke put her free hand on Lexa's abdomen and began pushing her toward the hall so they could go upstairs.

"How do you know that?"

"I can see it in your eyes." Clarke told her as she turned Lexa around so she could walk up the stairs.

"What if I can't sleep knowing she's out there?"  
"You will." Clarke answered her when they reached the top of the stairs.

"How do you know that?" Lexa repeated.

"Because I'll run my fingers up and down your back and that always puts you to sleep."

"What did she tell you?" Lexa asked as Clarke continued to help her tired wife through the door.

"She told me you were sick when you were younger and she helped take care of you."

"What else?"

Clarke pulled at Lexa's shirt and pants and undressed her. She thought about putting new clothes on her, but Lexa looked more exhausted than she'd seen her so she just moved her back to the bed and slid her in under the blankets.

"She told me you are strong." Clarke began removing her own clothes. Lexa watched her, but not in any way that resembled lust. She was admiring.

"What else?"

"She told me she wants to see you again and that she will return and I believe her."

"I want to know more about her."

Clarke climbed into the bed with her and allowed Lexa to move back against her so she could hold her this time.

"You will."

"I want to know if she has ever found love, if she found happiness, what she wants for the future."

"You can ask her."

"Does she want children one day, does she still train or did she stop when she had to leave? I have too many questions."

"That you can ask her. Sleep, Lexa. Please." Clarke pulled back and looked at Lexa's tattoo as she ran her fingers up and down it. She finally understood what happened to the non-existent eighth circle.

"Do you want them?"

"Want what?" Clarke questioned while slowing her movements knowing that usually worked.

"Children?"

Clarke gulped.

"Lexa, I can't…"

Lexa rolled over to face her.

"Have them with me?" She rested her forehead against Clarke's. "Then, why did Abby bring it up yesterday as if it were a possibility?"

"No, I mean… I can't. My mom told me after I got shot. The bullet hit some things and damage… and I can't."

Lexa backed up and her tired eyes got wide.

"Why did you never tell me this?"

"You never told me you had a twin sister."

"Clarke…"

Clarke ran her fingers through Lexa's hair.

"Because when it happened, it didn't matter and then I stopped thinking about it. I never thought we'd be talking about this. You've never brought up the idea of kids."

"It was never possible before for us."

"And now?" Clarke checked as she continued running her fingers through Lexa's hair.

"I don't know. It's not something I considered until yesterday because I didn't think it could happen. Two women. Two Commanders. Did you consider it before? On the ark or with Finn"

Clarke had to pull back she was laughing so hard. Lexa just watched her confused.

"Lexa, I was a kid on the ark. I spent my last year there in a cell." She paused to allow her laughter to die down. "And with Finn… no. I never thought about that. I never thought about any of this." She pressed their foreheads back together. "You are the only one I've ever considered doing any of this with."

"So, is that something you want for us?" Lexa closed her eyes awaiting Clarke's answer.

Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa and began sliding her fingers up and down her back again.

"Not unless it's something you want."

"I want to give you everything you want." Lexa's tired voice let out.

"Lexa…" Clarke kissed her temple. "You already have."


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: To answer a question I received, Luna will be back.

Chapter 28:

It was the next day when they finally returned to Polis. They went almost immediately to Titus's room. He'd decided to stay and await their arrival.

"Heda." He bowed his head to Lexa and then looked at Clarke. "And Heda." He bowed his head again.

"Luna has returned to hiding." Lexa explained. "She insisted upon your freedom, Titus and it has been granted."

"Heda, thank you."

Lexa took a moment to choose her next words carefully.

"It is I who should be thanking you." She finally said. "You returned my sister to me and I am grateful."

"Heda, it was the least I could do."

"Yes, it was." Lexa's voice returned to its authoritative tone. "Your actions against Clarke were against me and they effect us still to this day." Lexa continued and Clarke wondered if she was referring to what she'd revealed to her last night or if she was talking about how she still thinks about Clarke getting shot and wakes up at night in cold sweats at least once a month when it comes to her in a nightmare.

"Clarke, I am sorry."

"Have you told anyone else of Luna's existence?" Lexa ignored his apology.

"No, Heda. I found her, cared for her after her injury and came straight to you after. I have not spoken of it since I arrived here to anyone other than you and Clarke."

"Tell no one."

"Of course, Heda."

"Do you believe him, Clarke?" Lexa asked her without turning away from Titus.

Clarke looked at Titus as he looked back at her.

"I do."

"Your banishment is lifted. If you wish to return to Polis, you may do so."

"Heda?" He questioned.

"You will never hold a position of authority again. You will never advise another Commander, but if you wish to remain, you may."

"Heda, I am grateful-."

"Do not thank me, Titus. I do not do this because I have forgiven you for what you did to Clarke."

"I understand."

"Titus, I can find a place for you to live." Clarke added.

"Clarke, I must ask you why you would help me after what I did to you."

"Because Lexa has shown strength today in allowing you to remain. I can do the same and find you a place to live."

"Is this your wish, Titus?" Lexa asked.

Titus bowed his head.

"No, Heda." He replied and lifted his head. "Though I am grateful for the offer, I do not believe I can return. The people here know what I have done. They know I was responsible for what happened to Clarke. I deserved my punishment."  
"Then, why did you bring Luna back?" Clarke asked him.

"I told you. I sought penance. I knew I would never fully be able to obtain it, but if Luna has helped you at all, Lexa, then I am happy. Can I ask why she returned to hiding?"

"No." Lexa answered matter-of-factly.

"Will you go back to where you were before?" Clarke changed the subject.

"Yes, if you ever need me, I will be there."

"See to it you have a horse to take out of the city and whatever provisions you may need. The guards have been instructed to let you leave. They will help you."

"Thank you, Heda."

Titus began to walk out of the room.

"And Titus?"

"Sha, Heda?"

Lexa looked at him in a way Clarke hadn't seen her look at him since before the shooting.

"If you change your mind, you are free to return."

Titus nodded and left the room.

"You know Luna never said you had to lift his banishment." Clarke recalled as she stood next to Lexa.

"I do."

Clarke took her hand.

"Come on. Let's go."

_____

"Do we have to call you Commander now?" Raven asked Clarke as she helped her move boxes of electronics into the back of a truck.

"No. Would you even if I said yes?" Clarke replied with a laugh. She loaded the last of her boxes and closed the back door.

"No. Where's the wife right now?" Raven teased.

"Where's Wick right now?" She teased back.

"He's at work." Raven replied. "We're hanging out later though."  
"That's great, Raven."

"We'll see. Before, I wasn't exactly ready to let him in. I had some stuff to go through first."

"And now?"  
"We'll see." She repeated. "Lexa back at the office?"

"She's in a meeting with the ambassadors."

"How was the honeymoon? Lots of sex and forgot to tell people you were leaving so they freaked out and ran after you? Just guessing."

Clarke climbed into the passenger seat and Raven climbed behind the wheel.

"That wasn't our honeymoon. Is that what people think?"  
"I don't know. Maybe."

"I don't even think Lexa knows what a honeymoon is."

"Why don't you tell her then, and side question, what exactly did you do out there?"

Clarke thought about how best to answer that question. She didn't think Lexa would want anyone to know about Luna yet.

"We just moved in. Unpacked. Moved stuff around."

"Boring." Raven supplied.

"Maybe we could use a little boring."

"I think you could use a vacation. You are wound tight sometimes and she always seems to be."

"Hey!"

"Just an observation. Monty, let's go!" Raven yelled out the window. "We have to get these over to engineering."

Monty came running out of Raven's house with a few random items and climbed into the backseat.

"Sorry, I think I got this working though. Could come in handy. Kane's heading out with Murphy on that shipping trip up the coast. I think I'll drop this stuff off to him later." He offered as he separated items into two small boxes in the back and Raven started the car.

"Hey Monty, you think Clarke and Lexa should go on a honeymoon, right?"

"That thing they used to do after people got married?"

"Yeah."

"Sure. Why not? If anyone deserves some time off, it's you guys." He told Clarke.

"Thanks, I guess."

"Hey wait, if you're a Commander now, shouldn't you be at the meeting too?" Raven asked as they drove.  
"It's more of a technicality than anything. If I wanted to be there, I could. Lexa asked. I told her no."

"And she's cool with that?"

"Yes, Raven."

"Alright, let's get this stuff to engineering then and why is Kane going on a shipping trip with Murphy?"

"They're scouting land up the coast. He wants to try to find more land to farm and places to build docks for more shipping, I guess. These things should help check radiation in the soil." Monty answered.

Clarke liked that she was able to step in and help people based on need instead of having to tie herself down to one job. It enabled her to work with different people, witness different things and in her opinion, that was the most important way she could be the Flamekeeper to her people. She needed to see as much as possible.

_____

"Hey mom." Clarke walked through the front door of the hospital and saw Abby standing off to the side looking at a chart.

"Clarke you're back?"

"We got back this morning." She informed.

"I'm glad you two had some time together, but I think we all would have appreciated a heads up that you'd be leaving and not coming back."

"Sorry, we didn't plan on it."

Abby looked up at her daughter, but avoided asking the reason they'd failed to notify people they'd be staying at their new home. It was possible she didn't want to know about their activities; assuming as everyone else had assumed that they'd spent their entire time together having sex.

"Well, we're happy you're back."

"Do you remember what you asked me before about a honeymoon?"

"Was that what that was? Abby asked and then turned. "Have him take an x-ray and get me the results as soon as they're in." Abby passed the chart off to a nurse and took Clarke in the direction of her small office.

"No, it wasn't. I was just thinking about what you said then Raven asked me about it and I don't know if she could actually get away like that. I mean a house on the outskirts is one thing, but getting completely away is probably impossible and where would we even go? We don't know what's out there and-"

"Honey, do you want to take your wife somewhere to celebrate the fact that you just got married?" Abby asked as she sat down behind her desk.

"You and Kane didn't get a honeymoon."

"Marcus and I didn't want one. We discussed it. He didn't want to get away together and I'm perfectly content staying here. I had work to do here and he wanted to work with Murphy right now so we can make sure to have enough crops planted to make it through winter. Maybe someday we'll go somewhere, but we didn't want to now. If you do though, you should. I'm sure the ambassadors can run this place while you two take a little vacation, Clarke."

"Am I crazy to want this for us?"

"No, honey. You're not crazy to want time alone with someone you love. I think that's especially true in your case. You and Lexa are leaders. Even when you were alone in that building, you were never really alone. Now, you have a house, which is great, but it's a quick ride away as I believe Indra demonstrated the other day."

Clarke leaned against the wall.

"Where would we even go?"

"Just think of someplace private that you could both enjoy."

"We're surrounded by woods."

"The world existed before we got here, Clarke. You used to love history lessons on the ark. Maybe there's someplace still around. Probably partially destroyed at least, but it's a place to start."

Clarke thought about it for a moment.

"Oh, I dropped the supplies you wanted at the other hospital and brought the meds here you requested."

"Why are you making supply runs, honey? You have more important things to do."

"I disagree." Clarke waved at her mom and left the office.

_____

"Where was Roan today?" Octavia asked Lexa after the rest of the ambassadors left the room.

"He sent his second instead." Lexa replied from her throne. "Over here." She motioned for her guards, who carried another nearly identical throne to move it toward her.

"You're really embracing this whole 2 Commanders thing, aren't you?" Octavia asked as the guards set the throne down. Lexa stood from her own and they moved it sideways slightly. They went back to the other chair and moved it over so that both were centered in the room.

"It's not enough to say it, Octavia. We must prove it with our actions."

"And what does Clarke think of this?"

"Clarke knows she has a place here. It is rightfully hers, but if she doesn't desire to sit in on meetings or take the chair when it's not required, then it does not matter to me."

Lexa began walking toward the door and Octavia followed her.

"Roan has missed the last 3 meetings. He's Ice Nation, Lexa."

"Roan gave up the title of King so I knew he supported me. He is only an ambassador now and he did that voluntarily, Octavia."

They continued down the hall.

"It just seems strange. He attended every meeting and then he hasn't been seen in weeks. Even former Azgeda I know have commented that people haven't seen him."  
"Thank you, Octavia." Lexa arrived at the elevator and planned to take it up.

"I know you think I'm paranoid."  
"Octavia, I value your opinion. It is why you're an ambassador. I will send for someone to locate Roan and find out the reason he hasn't attended our regular meetings."

"Really?"

"Yes. Would you like to be that someone?"

"I would."

"Take whoever you need and report back to me what you find."

Octavia nodded and watched as Lexa entered the elevator. She'd wait for it to return to take it down and ride toward Lincoln to let him know of her mission. He would insist on joining her, of course.

_____

"I was told you'd be in here." Lexa remarked upon finding Clarke in the library. Over the years, books that survived the bombings had been found and brought to Polis. Many Commanders including Lexa had referred to them for lessons, for comfort during times they found particularly stressful and sometimes for fun.

"I was just doing some reading. I helped out in engineering today and went on a supply run. Thought I'd relax a little."

"Should I have had a library built in our home?" Lexa asked her. She sat down next to Clarke on the oversized sofa in the large room with books on shelves and piled on the floor. Clarke had been lying down, but she moved her legs for Lexa to sit. She placed them instead on her lap and Lexa's arms went over them.

"I'm more than happy with my art room."

"What are you reading about?"

"Just history stuff." Clarke replied and closed the book. She set it on top of a pile of others on the floor.

"Should I have some of these brought to the house at least or to our room?"

"I'll carry my own books, Lexa." Clarke sat up, but left her legs where they were.

"Of course you will."

"How was the meeting?"

"Fine. A few of the ambassadors were worried about a grain shortage this winter, but I believe we'll make it. Kane is leaving to find more land to farm and we can ration if we need too."

"Maybe we should start rationing now just to be safe."

"Maybe you should have been at the meeting." Lexa teased.

"Anything else?" Clarke avoided.

"You have a new chair."

"I do?"

"Next to mine."

"Lexa…"  
"You don't have to sit in it, Clarke. It belongs to you though. You are a Commander now."

"I'm not used to that."

"You will be." Lexa leaned back and rested her head against the sofa. "Octavia is concerned about Roan. He hasn't been attending meetings. She asked to go find him. I gave her the order. I assume she'll take Lincoln."

"She's always looking for the next battle."  
"I'm glad she does. It keeps us prepared."

"Let's stay here tonight. You look tired."

"You just want to sleep in our old bed." Lexa pointed out with her eyes closed.

"No, I don't want you falling off a horse because you're too tired to ride."

"We could take a car."

"You don't like cars."

"No, but if it gets us home faster…" She faded out.

Clarke watched Lexa for a moment and smiled at the thought of her calling their new house home and being willing to take a mode of transportation she didn't exactly favor just to get them there for the night.

"Come on. I'll drive." Clarke stood and pulled Lexa up from the sofa. "We should probably tell people we're leaving this time though."

"Yes, Commander." Lexa expressed sans any real energy.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29:

Two days later, Octavia rode back into Polis. She found Lexa and Clarke in the assembly room. Clarke was sitting in the chair for the first time since Lexa had it placed there for her.

"Commander-" Octavia began when she burst through the doors with Lincoln behind her. "Commanders." She corrected when she saw Clarke there as well. Only a few ambassadors were in the room for this meeting.

"Octavia, what is it?" Lexa asked her.

"I found out what happened to Roan and you're not going to like it." She moved toward the thrones.

"Leave us." Lexa ordered and waited until the ambassadors were out of the room before she motioned to Octavia.

"What happened?" Clarke asked and stood.

"He's dead." Octavia informed.

"What?" Lexa stood.

"It's true. We saw his body." Lincoln added. "In the woods. It had been left for the animals."

"His head wasn't attached to his body anymore, but it was him. I recognized his tattoos." Octavia explained.

"Why did his second not inform us of his death?" Lexa questioned.  
"Maybe she's the one that killed him." Octavia replied.

"Why would she kill Roan?" Clarke asked.

"I don't know, but if she hasn't told you he's dead or at least suspects that he's missing, that seems weird to me."

"He appears to have been dead for at least a few days. Maybe longer. It was hard to tell." Lincoln shared.

"What do we do?" Clarke asked Lexa. "Call all the ambassadors for a meeting? See if they know anything?"

"Octavia, bring me Roan's second. I'd like to talk to her myself."

"This is Ice Nation. We should-"

"Azgeda is no more." Lexa interrupted. "Find me his second, Octavia."

"Octavia, go." Clarke added. "I'll send for the other ambassadors. We'll question them one by one. Lincoln, can you help?"

"Yes, I can send for the other judges as well."

"Do it." Clarke told him.

Lincoln went to turn to leave and pulled Octavia along with him.

"Why would someone kill Roan?" Clarke asked Lexa.

"I don't know. He's been on our side since before the peace."

"Since you killed his mother."

"Her death was a means to an end, Clarke."

"I know. You did the right thing. Roan was a good king and he bowed to you when all the nations became one."

"We owe it to him to find the one responsible for his death."

"We do." Clarke replied and looked at Lexa who appeared to be considering something. "We haven't had a death like this in a long time." Clarke read her thoughts.

"I had hoped we never would again."

"We'll find who did this, Lexa."

"I fear we will not be spending the night at home tonight, Clarke."

"This was home for four years. I think we'll be okay." Clarke tried to cheer her up. "I'll start working on getting the ambassadors together."

"Roan had a brother. He was younger and dismissed by Nia as Roan was as soft."

"I remember him. Roark, right?"

"Yes, he'd be about my age now. I haven't seen him recently, but Indra spoke of him working on one of her crews. He lives in Polis. I'll find him and discover what he knows."

"Maybe you should send someone else. If someone killed Roan, they might be trying to take out people in places of authority and you'd be at the top of that list."

Lexa turned toward her.

"If that were true, Clarke, then you of all people know that I will not send someone to their death without being willing to take the journey myself."

"I know that about you all too well, but Indra would likely not be a target at all. Why potentially put yourself in a situation you don't need too?"

"I will be fine. You've seen me fight, Clarke. Question the ambassadors. I'll return by nightfall."

She began to move out of the room.

"Lexa…"  
"I'll be fine, Clarke. Indra will be by my side and-" She'd turned back to Clarke.

"I just wanted to say I love you."

Lexa nodded.

"And I you."

_____

Clarke and Lincoln questioned all the ambassadors with the exception of Octavia and Kane for the next several hours. They did it 1:1 to keep them all separate in case some of them were responsible and would use a joint interview or an assembly meeting to get their stories straight. They'd learned nothing significant. Roan's second was still unaccounted for and Lexa and Indra had yet to return from seeking out his brother.

Clarke sent Lincoln home and returned to her room to await Lexa's arrival. The sun had set and the moon was moving through the sky. Clarke had started to grow nervous that Lexa had not returned so she left their room and made her way toward the elevator. It opened before she could press the button and Lexa stood there. There was blood on her face and on her armor.

"Lexa! What happened? Are you okay?" Clarke immediately placed her hands on Lexa's face and turned her head to try to search for injuries.

"It's not my blood." Lexa informed and stepped out of the elevator. "Roark is dead. We got there in time to watch him die. We tried to save him, but…" She shook her head and passed Clarke on her way to their room.

"What happened?" Clarke repeated as she followed quickly behind. She caught up to Lexa and then ended up in front of her.

"Hold on." She put her hand over Clarke's just as Clarke was about to open the door. "Did you speak of Luna to anyone?"

"What? No. Why would you ask me that?"

"Because as Roark was dying in my arms, he said her name."

"Maybe Titus lied and told someone about her."

"No, you were right to trust him. I don't believe he spoke of her to anyone."

"And you think I did?" Clarke was offended.

"Not like that. I've never doubted your loyalty to me, Clarke. I never will. I trust you with my life. I just wondered if you spoke about it with your mom or someone else and someone overheard or they shared the news of her existence with another."

"No, Lexa. I haven't told anyone."

"Then, why did he speak her name after-" She stopped herself.

"After what?"

"It was Ontari."

"Ontari?" Clarke checked that she'd heard her correctly.

"She killed him. I suspect she killed Roan as well. Octavia found me as I was coming here. Roan's second is dead as well."

"We haven't heard from Ontari in years."

"She's been waiting. She's been plotting her revenge. We saw Ontari at the top of a clearing. We knew it was her at once. She was waving the flag of the Azgeda. She wanted us to see her. I had Indra take warriors to find her, but they won't. She's been in hiding all this time."

"But why would Roark say Luna's name?"  
"Ontari must know about her. It's not as if she was a secret when she lived in Polis. Maybe she came across her while she's been in hiding."  
"Why would she be interested in her?" Clarke asked.

"I don't know."

"Why would she kill Roan and Roark?"  
"I don't know, Clarke."

"How did she-" Clarke stopped herself. "After the peace, when we had the first summit, Ontari was there."

"Yes."

"I saw her. I remember because I wanted to keep my eye on her. I was happy when she left Polaris because I didn't have to worry about her trying to kill you or me anymore, but that day, she was with Roan. I remember. She spent a lot of time talking to Monty and Jasper."

"Clarke, what-"

Clarke thought back. She was searching her mind for memories, but also for the brain power to put those memories together in a way that made sense of everything that had just happened.  
"Monty's house is near the edge of Polaris. He and Jasper live next door to each other. They have a supply of electronics. Pieces mostly, but Monty works on making things work out there and Jasper helps sometimes. I know because I've done supply runs out there. What if it wasn't a person that told Ontari or Roark of Luna? Lexa, what if…" She dropped out. "We need to have someone sweep this place for bugs."

"What?"

"Before we got married, I remember Jasper telling me that Monty was working with bugs for fun." She caught Lexa's eye. "Listening devices." She clarified. Lexa nodded. "Jasper told me Monty noticed a couple of them were missing, but he thought he'd just misplaced them. We'd been moving parts back and forth a lot as he fixed things."

"Ontari wouldn't know what a listening device is, Clarke."

"No, but Jasper's ex-girlfriend was Ice Nation. They were together for a while back then and Jasper and Monty are nearly always together. His new girlfriend is Trikru, but the one he had before, he mentioned she started acting strange and that's why he ended it. He told me before he thought she stole things from people. Little things here and there, but enough to notice."  
"You think she helped Ontari?"  
"It's a leap, I know, but I didn't tell anyone about Luna, Lexa and I don't think Titus did either. None of your guards would betray you like that. We can interrogate them, but I don't think it will lead anywhere. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong, but we should at least check." Clarke opened the door. She put her finger to her lips and Lexa understood that to mean be quiet.

_____

The two of them searched the room slowly. Lexa wasn't exactly sure what she was looking for. She guessed she'd know it when she saw it. They searched under everything and then on top of everything. They looked in every gap, crack and crevice until Clarke finally saw something. She turned around and pulled Lexa over to show her. The small electronic device was hidden in their bed. It had been placed between two wood pieces in the intricate wooden design of their headboard. Clarke nodded at Lexa as she moved to climb on the bed.

"So, they're moving the bed to the new house tomorrow?" Clarke said to Lexa, but while pointing at the bug. "It will be nice to have it there. We can sleep in my old room tonight since they need to take it apart and get it down stairs." She faked.

"Yes. That is what we'll do." Lexa confirmed a little confused as Clarke nodded at her.

"We should go back to the meeting room and discuss the possible grain shortage with the ambassadors."

"Yes. We should." Lexa stated plainly.

_____

Thirty minutes later, Monty had a recorder with a loop of work being done ready to go. They had sound of a few of the workers in Polis who were building a new stand in the marketplace and they sat the recorder on the bed. Monty pressed play and then the three of them left the room. It was Monty's idea to make sure that the story Clarke told actually then happened in case Ontari was indeed listening. They weren't ready to let on that they'd figured out how she'd gotten the information about Luna and anything else the two of them might have said to one another thinking they were alone.

"You really think this will work?" Clarke asked Monty.

"I think we play it for ten minutes and then we go in and destroy it. Ontari and whoever else might be listening will just think it got destroyed while they took the bed apart. It's the only way we can keep up that we don't know about it." Monty replied.

"The less Ontari knows about what we've discovered, the better." Lexa agreed.

They waited for a few more minutes and then walked into the room quietly. Monty aimed a bug zapper at the device and sent a signal disrupting the frequency. He then dropped it into water just as a precaution.

He walked around the room aiming a bug sweeper he'd built at Arkadia a couple of years before. Monty was a good guy to have around in a pinch. He and Octavia were always a little more paranoid than the others. They just had very different skillsets.

"We're clear." He announced. "I'll sweep the rest of the floor before I go just in case. Do you want to do the whole building?"

"This floor tonight and the assembly room are the first priority. You can stay in one of our rooms here if you wish and conduct the remaining sweeps tomorrow morning."

"Sounds like fun." Monty replied sarcastically.

"Monty, can you stop by our house after and sweep there too?"

"Sure. It's on my way home anyway." He replied and left the room to begin the sweep.

"Is it really safe to talk now?" Lexa checked.

"Yes, it's gone. We're okay." Clarke ran her hands up and down Lexa's covered arms. "Come on. Let's get you cleaned up."

"How did you know?" Lexa asked.

"How did I know what?" Clarke started walking her back toward their bathroom.

"What did I do without you before?" Lexa took a deep breath as Clarke turned her toward the bathroom door, sat her on the chair and started running her a bath. "I never would have figured it out. A listening device?"

"Lexa, you didn't have listening devices to find until Sky People came." Clarke explained and began removing her armor as Lexa sat there somewhat dumbfounded.

"She heard us, Clarke"

"I know." She pulled off her shirt.

"She knows about Luna."

"Yes, but Luna will be safe. She's stayed hidden all these years."

"What if Ontari found her before? What if she finds her again?"

"We can go find Titus in the morning. It's too late now. We can ask him to reveal where he found her. Maybe she's there. We can protect her; bring her back."

"How long has it been there? We're lucky if there's no bug at the house since we've been there more than here recently, but what if she's heard other things?"

"We haven't really had other things to talk about, Lexa. Grain shortage probably isn't what she was hoping to hear."

"She heard us, Clarke."

"Lexa, I know. Luna will-"

"She heard us." Lexa repeated emphasizing the last word and holding Clarke's hands as Clarke had attempted to remove her pants for her.

"Oh." She knew what Lexa meant. She meant she heard them in their most intimate moments. She heard them say they loved each other and she heard them express that love. She knelt down in front of her. "We don't know what she has. Maybe she only took the listening device to hear us live. Maybe she doesn't have a recorder. She might not even know that a recorder exists. That would mean she'd have to be sitting there all the time to hear everything and we both know she's been too busy for that. So, the likelihood that she heard us…" She faded and watched as Lexa seemed confused. "None of that matters. The whole world knows we love each other now. They saw us bind our spirits, Lexa. So, even if she did hear us-"

"But who we are in here is special, Clarke."

"I know and it doesn't matter what she heard. No one will ever understand how much we love each other. No one will ever know what you mean to me because it's impossible for me to even say it in words. Those words don't exist."

Lexa looked down at her while the sounds of rushing water filled the room.

"Stay with me?" She asked as she gripped Clarke's hands tighter.

"Always."

They stood and Lexa undressed herself the rest of the way. Clarke removed her own clothing and turned off the water. They climbed into the tub as they had done all those years ago and many times after that. They were facing one another while Clarke took a rag to Lexa's blood stained face and hands to clean it off.

When they finished, they climbed into the bed they'd pretended earlier to take apart for transport and Clarke worried that there might be yet another war on the horizon; one more battle they'd have to survive just to be able to share their lives together in peace.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30:

"He's not here." Lexa told Clarke as she emerged from Titus's shack. She slammed the door shut behind her. "Hon op Titus!" Find Titus. She issued the command to the 20 or so warriors and guards she'd brought around. They began spreading out; some with horses and some on foot. "We can't just stay here and hope for his return."

"We should go to our house. Luna knows where it is. She said we could use it as a meeting place before. If Ontari has been following her, she might try to find you and she'd go there before she'd go to Polis."

"I cannot wait for her, Clarke."

"Ontari won't hurt her, Lexa."

"How can you know that? She was loyal to Nia. She wants the throne."

"Maybe, but if she's been tracking Luna… if she's seen her at all, she could have killed her and she didn't."  
"That you know of."

"Why would Roark say her name to you if she was already dead?" Clarke asked.

"Roark died yesterday, Clarke. She could have killed Luna last night."

"Heda!" A guard yelled and Clarke and Lexa turned to him. They saw Titus and Luna emerge from the woods.

Clarke breathed a sigh of relief; happy that Lexa would not have to suffer yet another loss. Titus looked as if he'd been through hell. His clothing was tattered nearly to pieces and he had both dirt and blood on his skin. Luna looked as she had the last time Clarke had seen her.

"Titus, what happened?"

"Heda, Ontari kom Azgeda came here last night. She sought Luna's location and I would not provide it. She tried to kill me, but I was able to get away. She tracked me for many miles, but I recalled locations Luna told me about and hid. Once I was sure she could not follow, I went in search of Luna."

"He found me only a short while ago." Luna added. "He needs help." She was holding Titus up with her arm. "He was cut."

"I am fine." Titus replied.

"Titus, we brought a healer. She will see to your wounds." She raised a hand and a guard ran back to where they'd left the rest of their party. A healer had joined them as well as three ambassadors.

It was by following the guard's movements that Clarke noticed everyone around them staring at Luna.

"Lexa…" Clarke lifted her eyes and Lexa followed her glance.

"Luna kom Trikru has returned to us." She told the group. "You will see to her safety as you do to your Commanders."

"Sha, Heda." A few of them stated in unison.

The healer moved to Titus and lifted his shirt, revealing a large, bleeding cut beneath. She began moving him toward the small shack to work on wrapping it.

"Ontari found me after I left your house. She asked me to join her. She said we had every right to power and if I supported her in her revolution, I would be her second."

"She wanted to make you her second?" Clarke asked her.

"She wanted to take the throne. She knew Lexa and you are both too closely guarded for her to attack. She sought help from Roan and Roark since they are the rightful heirs to Azgeda, but they would not help her so she killed them. I believe she sought out the help of others, but I do not know who."  
"How do you know Roan and Roark dead?" Lexa asked her with her hand on her sword.

"Because she found me again last night." Luna paused. "I told her I would support her the first time she found me. I was in a cave. I had no exit and she was at its entrance and she had weapons. I told her I would help her so she would spare my life." She took a deep breath. "I remained there after she left in case she was hiding and tracking my movements. When I was sure she'd moved on to continue her plan, I went to your house to find you, but you weren't there. I couldn't risk staying there though. If she was following me, I couldn't lead her straight to you. I thought I felt someone following me when I moved to another location I've used for shelter before so I remained in place in order to make her believe I was on her side until I could find a way to warn you."

"So, she doesn't know about our house?" Clarke asked.

"Not from me." Luna replied. "I was preparing to travel to Polis when she found me again. She laid out her plan. I was to get close to you, kill you and Ontari would take Clarke. I would impersonate you in Polis and bring Ontari on as the new ambassador. She would then take out all who opposed her and I would reveal myself. I would remain her second. Clarke would be killed after we had ensured success as a way of ensuring no one else would attempt to take her throne. Her death would serve to scare. She came to me last night and told me the first part of her plan had gone exactly as she'd hoped."

"Why did she allow us to see her after killing Roark?"

"She's taunting you." Clarke explained. "She was raised by Nia. She's power hungry, believes she deserves it and probably crazy."

"Lexa, I swear to you, I was not going to help her. Titus found me on my way to Polis. We were on our way to you to warn you. We had to return to his house to retrieve a horse since his injury made walking difficult."

"I believe you." Lexa nodded at her. "You must return to Polis now. It's for your protection, Luna."

"What will you do about Ontari?" Luna asked.

"I will find her and I will kill her." Lexa replied with anger.

Just then, Clarke heard a sound she recognized, but hadn't heard in a long time. She turned to see Lexa hobble backwards. Luna caught her before she could fall and Clarke instinctively reached out for her and held onto her until she could safely be placed on the ground. Everything happened seemingly all at once. Guards and warriors alike all saw the arrow hit Lexa's shoulder. They needed no orders. They pointed to the direction the arrow had come from and began running and riding in that direction to track the attacker.

"Luna, get the healer!" Clarke ordered as she looked down at her wife. "Lexa, you're okay. It's just your shoulder. You're okay." She repeated, but it was more for her than it was for Lexa. "Just stay down."

"I'm okay, Clarke." Lexa told her and reached for the arrow.

"Lexa, no!" Clarke stopped her. "Stay down!"

Luna ran toward the shack and Clarke watched her run inside. The healer emerged and Clarke realized she'd been wrong.

"Heda!" The healer yelled and began moving toward them.

"No! Stay there!" Clarke gripped Lexa and stood. "We're coming to you. Get inside. We're in the open here."

Lexa stood and Clarke helped her toward the shack. They closed the door behind them and Lexa collapsed onto a chair in the corner while Titus remained on his bed.

"Heda! Are you okay?" He asked and began to move so that Lexa could lie down.

"I'm fine, Titus. Pull it out." She ordered the healer. "I need to go after Ontari. This ends now."

"Should you pull it out?" Clarke asked the healer who was examining the wound in Lexa's shoulder.

"It is minor." She replied in broken English.

Clarke nodded. Lexa gripped her hand as the healer first broke the arrow and then examined the wound further to ensure she'd been right. She began to pull the rest of the arrow out of Lexa's shoulder and Clarke felt Lexa's hand grip her own more tightly than she'd ever felt. It hurt, but she was sure Lexa's pain was worse so she said nothing. Lexa did not scream or cry. She made no audible sound at all. Perhaps she was using her anger at Ontari to block out the pain.

"Heda, please lie down as she bandages you." Titus begged as he hobbled over toward them.

Lexa stood and released Clarke's hand. She nodded at him and began to walk toward the bed. Clarke moved with her. That was when Lexa's eyes closed and she fell back into Clarke's arms.

"Lexa!" Clarke yelled.

Luna and Titus helped lift her over to the bed while Clarke turned toward the healer to unleash a million questions on her.

"Feisbona." The healer held the arrow head in her hand.

"Poison?" Clarke questioned her.

"She can smell it." Titus explained. He asked the healer something in Trigedasleng that Clarke couldn't quite hear because she could only hear the word poison repeating inside her mind. "It is potent. Heda will need an antidote immediately if she is to survive."

"What is it?" Clarke asked him.

"We do not possess it here. It is made from many ingredients. The healers have it in Polis. We must go now if we are to make it in time."

"How long does she have?" Clarke asked while looking at her unconscious wife.

"Not long."

"Will we make it, Titus?" Clarke asked him.

"It will be close." He informed reluctantly.

Clarke thought for a moment.

"Can she be moved?"

"Yes, we must move her. She does not have time for someone to go to Polis and return with the antidote."

"What about meeting us somewhere?" Clarke asked and pulled a radio off her hip. "Octavia, come in." She said into it. "Octavia, please come in." She said to herself. "Anyone? This is Clarke. Anyone?"

"Clarke, I'm here." It was Octavia's voice. "Did you find Titus?" She asked. Clarke had filled her in about Titus and Luna before leaving that morning.

"Yes, but I don't have time for this. Octavia, I need you to get my mom to our house. Lexa's been poisoned."  
"What?"

"I'm giving the radio to Titus. He will tell you what we need for the antidote. We're on our way now. Octavia, she doesn't have long. Tell my mom to hurry." She passed the radio to Titus and listened as he spoke to Octavia about the antidote. Luna and Clarke lifted Lexa's body with the healer's help. When Titus was finished and Octavia was on her way to get Abby, he helped them get Lexa to a horse. She'd have to ride with Titus behind her so he could keep her upright while they rode. Despite his injury, he managed it. They passed the group of ambassadors who were on their way to find out what had happened. Clarke ordered them back to Polis to ensure its security and to meet up with Octavia and Indra who would be in charge in their absence. They rode off without asking about the girl who was identical to their Commander.

_____

Clarke found herself looking more to her right than in front of her. She kept an almost continuous eye on her wife while Luna rode ahead of them. She'd left the guards behind them to find Ontari. She couldn't worry about that now. All that mattered was Lexa.

It took them too long in Clarke's opinion to arrive at their house. If Ontari truly didn't know about this place, then it was the safest place for them while they waited for Abby to arrive. Titus carried Lexa inside and laid her on the sofa while Clarke went to the kitchen to retrieve a cloth dipped in cold water to drape across her sweaty forehead. She knelt by Lexa's side while Luna paced back and forth. She would go to the doors every now and then either to check on Abby's arrival or check for possible enemies.

"It is impressive what she's managed to do." Luna finally filled the silence while Titus finally allowed the healer to tend to his wound.

"What?" Clarke didn't have the mental energy to try to figure out what she was talking about.

"Ontari. She's done this on her own. It's terrible and it will be fruitless, but it is impressive."

"She shot your sister with a poisonous arrow and you find that impressive?!" Clarke replied angrily.

"I didn't mean it that way, Clarke."

"I know. I'm sorry." Clarke sighed. "It doesn't make any sense. If she had a plan, why shoot Lexa? Why try to kill her this way?"

"You said it yourself. She is crazy. She may have been following Titus and I and determined I was not on her side as she thought. She saw an opportunity to take Lexa's life and she took it. With the poison, she wouldn't need a direct shot so she could take it from far away." She took a moment to determine her next words. Clarke recognized that trait in Lexa as well. "Perhaps she couldn't take it any longer. The hiding can take a lot out of a person."

"No one forced her into hiding. Lexa offered to welcome her into Polaris."

"In Ontari's mind, she believes she should possess Lexa's power. It didn't matter what Lexa offered her, Ontari didn't believe it was hers to offer. She acted rashly and shot Lexa because it was the only chance she had and in her mind, it was the fastest way to achieve her goal."

"Why not shoot me too? Why not shoot you?"

"No time." Luna replied. "There were warriors everywhere. She took the one shot she had and fled to fight another day. I'm sure she believes that if Lexa dies, your days in power are numbered. She doesn't know of your marriage, but even if she did, she wouldn't recognize you as a true Commander. I doubt it would even enter her mind that others would support you."

Clarke heard it before she looked up to see the car approaching.

"Thank God!"

Abby rushed into the house and ran toward the unconscious Commander. She nearly pushed Clarke aside to kneel in her place.

"What happened?"

"Later. Can you heal her?" Clarke asked her mother.

"I brought it, but I also brought our stuff too." She opened her kit and Clarke watched her pull out some type of poultice. "Is this it?"

The healer nodded and took it from Abby. She examined it more closely and then handed it back to Abby. Abby tore at Lexa's shirt to get a better look. It was then that Clarke saw that there were black lines spreading like vines out from the wound and the black blood that still slowly oozed out of it. Abby reached back in her bag and removed item after item. She cleaned the wound quickly, examined it further and then placed the poultice on top. She taped it down and then reached for a syringe and a bottle of clear liquid. She injected Lexa in the arm and then stood, wiping her brow.

"Mom?" Clarke didn't even recognize her own voice. It sounded so small.

"We'll wait and see, honey." Abby revealed and put her hand on Clarke's arm. "We should know soon." She looked at Clarke's worried expression as Clarke stared at her wife. "Why don't you get her some water and some fresh clothes for when she wakes up? Titus, can you carry her upstairs for me?"

Titus nodded and lifted Lexa off the sofa with only a soft grunt. Clarke didn't take her eyes off of the woman while he had to navigate the thin staircase to get her up there.

"I will get the water." Luna stated as she watched Clarke. "Go."

Clarke didn't hesitate. She ran toward the stairs and climbed them two by two until she was in her room watching Titus lay his Commander down gently.

"I should have killed her when she found me." Titus told Clarke while staring at Lexa. "She should not have survived to do this."

Clarke didn't say anything back. She stood off to the side of the bed as Abby entered the room.

"Clarke, find her clothes. Come on, honey." Abby tried to give her something to do to occupy her thoughts.

Clarke began to snail around the room. She found something and tossed it on the bed. When she looked at what she'd pulled out, she realized they were actually her own clothes. It didn't matter. They'd shared clothes often.

"Here." Luna entered the room. She'd brought up a tray with several cups. "I thought we could all use some."

The healer followed her in and passed cups of water around.

"I should go outside. I saw weapons when we rode up. I will retrieve them and keep guard." Titus offered.

"I'll take the front." Luna offered back. "Call me when she wakes."

"Of course." Abby replied.

Titus nodded and the two of them left the room to grab the weapons Lexa had stored outside and keep watch over the house.

"I will prepare another cloth." The healer explained. She left the room.

"Honey, sit down." Abby put her hand on the small of Clarke's back and moved her toward the bed. "Come on. She'll want you here when she wakes up."

Clarke sat on the bed and cautiously moved toward Lexa. It took her a moment to place her hand on top of her wife's.

"I can't be without her, mom." She finally confessed.

"I know." Abby put her hand on Clarke's shoulder. "She'll pull through. It will take more than an arrow to take down Lexa." She comforted.

"How long until we know?" Clarke asked her. She turned to her mom. "Don't lie." She implored.

Abby gulped.

"She should be awake now, honey." She explained. "The poultice draws the poison out of the blood stream. The injection I gave her should speed up the process, but it's not an exact science yet. We're still trying to figure out how these natural remedies work with our chemical ones."

Clarke turned back to Lexa and stared at her with a look of desperation.

"Please." Clarke uttered under her breath.

The healer returned with a bowl and a fresh cloth, which Clarke then applied to Lexa's forehead gently. Abby sat in a chair and the healer leaned against the wall despite Abby offering her the chair. Clarke kept her eyes on Lexa.

"Clarke?" Luna entered the room. "There are guards outside now. They returned from their search. Ontari cannot be found. Titus is still outside keeping watch with them. Several warriors are still searching and a few returned to Polis for reinforcements in the search."

"Thank you, Luna." Clarke replied without looking away.

"So, you're Lexa's twin?" Abby caught up.

"I am."

"I'm Clarke's mother. I guess that makes us family. I wish we could have met under different circumstances."

"As do I."

"Clarke?" It was the best sound Clarke thought she'd ever heard.

"Hey, I'm here. I'm here, Lexa." Clarke watched as Lexa slowly opened her eyes. She brushed the damp hair out of her face and removed the cloth.

"How do you feel?" Abby asked and stood at the same time. She made her way to Lexa's side and immediately grabbed her wrist to feel for her pulse.

"Fine." Lexa answered.

"Liar." Clarke scolded.

"Your heart rate's a little high. I'll give you something." Abby left the room to retrieve her bag from downstairs. The healer followed, but Clarke guessed that was mostly out of respect than of actual need.

"How are you really?" Clarke leaned down and asked her.

"I feel tired. Mostly, I feel angry. Did we find her?"

"Not yet, but don't worry about her right now."

"She's right, Lexa. Focus on getting well. We will find Ontari and bring her to justice." Luna asserted.

Abby returned to the room and gave Lexa another injection to calm her heart rate. She took her pulse again and nodded.

"You should be okay. I'll change the poultice in a bit, but you need to rest. Stay here for the night."

"We can't waste time." Lexa tried to sit up.

"Lexa, lie down!" Clarke nearly yelled.

Lexa looked into her wife's eyes and saw their fire and their determination. She slowly placed her head back down against her pillow.

"I'll stay here tonight just in case." Abby told Clarke. "I'll go make up the sofa to sleep on."

"Thanks, mom."

"I should return to Polis." The healer shared after returning to the room. "I can prepare more antidote there."

Lexa nodded and the healer nodded back; leaving the room. Clarke was sure the healer felt less than useful since Abby's arrival, but her help had been imperative to Lexa's survival and Clarke would be forever grateful.

"I will sleep outside. Titus and I will keep guard with the rest."

"You don't have too, Luna. There's more than enough room in here." Clarke tried.

"I told you. I like it out there."

"We'll return to Polis tomorrow no matter what my condition is." Lexa shared with them. "We're safer there than we are out here. We may believe Ontari is alone, but there is a chance she's not. We shouldn't take it."

"That's fine. My mom brought a car. We can take that back. It will be safer and faster. We can take you to the hospital and have you checked out just in case."

"I need no hospital, Clarke."

"I will go downstairs and help your mother find the blankets." Luna offered as she apparently understood the moment between the spouses.

"You're going to the hospital, Lexa."

"What will happen if I don't?" Lexa teased her.

"Do you really want to find out?" Clarke teased back and lowered her lips to Lexa's forehead. "Please. I almost lost you."

"You will never lose me."

"You're still going to the hospital."

Lexa smiled at Clarke and then put her hand on the back of her neck.

"I will go if you kiss me right now." Lexa propositioned. Clarke leaned down and quickly pecked her lips. "Not exactly what I had in mind."

"Well, my mother and your sister are downstairs and you just took a poisoned arrow to the shoulder so it's going to be a while until you get that." Clarke winked at her and suddenly felt breath return to her lungs and joy enter her brain again. Lexa would be okay.

_____

Clarke felt her arm being lifted and it woke her from her slumber.

"Mom?"

"Honey, go back to sleep." Abby whispered in reply as she stood over Lexa. "I'm just changing this for her." She had already removed Lexa's bandage and was working on replacing it with another one. She'd given Lexa a sedative to help her sleep earlier despite her protestations that she needed to remain alert. Clarke assured her she'd be alert enough for the both of them. She waited until she'd checked on the guards and saw that Titus and Luna had found places to sleep outside as was their wish before she'd checked on Abby who was resting comfortably on their sofa and then returned to bed and placed her arm over Lexa's stomach to fall asleep herself.

"Is she okay?" Clarke whispered before closing her eyes again.

"She's fine." Abby replied and when she finished with the bandage, she was kind enough to pick Clarke's arm back up and place it over Lexa's stomach again. When she was about to close the door, she witnessed her daughter slide closer to Lexa and rest her head on her uninjured shoulder and a second later saw Lexa place her arm over Clarke's. She smiled at the thought that through all this, Clarke had managed to find someone she loved so much and who loved her in return.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31:

"Heda, I wish to return to my home if you permit it." Titus shared as Clarke helped Lexa slide into the back seat of the car.

"Ontari knows where you live, Titus." Lexa reminded.

"I won't stay there. I will return briefly to pack my belongings and I will make my home elsewhere."

"You will be safe in Polis, Titus." Clarke told him as she climbed in next to Lexa while Abby took the driver's seat and Luna sat next to her as she stared at the interior of a car for the first time.

"This will go faster than a horse?" Luna asked Abby. "How does it work?" Abby answered her and they continued talking.

"Titus, you will come to Polis with us. After we have located Ontari, you are free to return home." Lexa gave the order. "You are no longer banished, Titus, which makes you one of our people. We protect our people."

"Sha, Heda." He replied slightly disappointed.

"Get in." Abby told him.

"I prefer to ride with the guards."

"Yu hofli." You may. It was Clarke that granted him permission. Lexa glanced at her and smirked with a nod.

Titus bowed his head in respect and walked to join the guards who would follow them by horse to Polis.

Lexa seemed to watch Luna for most of the ride. The girl in the front was enamored by the vehicle and Clarke caught her wife laughing at her twin's expressions several times. She was so happy to see the woman smile again that she reached over and took her hand and held it for the remainder of the ride back to the city.

"Before we enter the city, put your hood up." Lexa told Luna. "I don't want everyone to know you're here until we're ready to reveal it."

Luna lifted her hood over her head and pulled it down slightly to conceal her face.

"Hospital, mom?" Clarke asked.

"Clarke…"

"It won't take long, Lexa. Just let me draw some blood and run a quick test. I'll have you out of there in under an hour." Abby helped her daughter.

"See?" Clarke tried.

"Fine." She acquiesced.

"What should I do?" Luna asked.

"We'll go in the side door." Abby told them. "My office is right next to it. We'll sneak you in and you can wait there. Just lock the door and no one will disturb you."

_____

Lexa watched as Abby stuck the needle in her arm. Clarke watched as Lexa watched. Abby pulled it out and took the syringe with her to another room while Clarke applied a bandage to the spot for Lexa.

"One test?"

"Yes, Lexa. Just one." Clarke confirmed. "Can I help it that I want to make sure the poison is no longer in your body?"

"The guards should be back by now. We'll meet them there and see to it that Indra, Octavia and Lincoln join us. I want to reinforce those who went in search for Ontari, but I don't want everyone here to know she's out there."

"I understand. There's no sense in creating a panic if we don't have too."

"It's more than just that, Clarke. I don't want them to know details about this at all if it can be prevented. We have peace. I won't let one person ruin that."

"People will know Roan and Roark were murdered. His second is gone. They'll wonder why."

"We will give them a murderer." Lexa began. "But we won't give them a revolutionary."

Clarke nodded.

"She's all clear." Abby returned. "No trace of the poison in your blood."

"Thank you." Lexa stood.

"How do you feel?" Abby asked her.

"I feel fine."

"You were still shot with an arrow." Clarke reminded her.

"I'm going to give you an antibiotic to make sure there's no infection. You have a few stitches in that shoulder so be careful with it."

"Stitches?" Clarke asked.

"I put them in after you both fell asleep, Clarke… after the poultice had done its job."

"How did I not wake up for that?" Clarke asked.

"I gave you the same sedative I gave her. Put it in your water. Just took a longer time for it to take effect on you since it wasn't injected."

"Mom, you can't keep drugging me." Clarke exclaimed.

"You needed to sleep. I didn't think it would come easily so I helped it along. That's all."

Abby filled a syringe and moved to a silently laughing Lexa. She injected her with it and then walked toward the door to the room.

"Thank you, Abby." Lexa replied gratefully.

"I'm going to stay here. Why don't you take the car back with you? Let me know if you experience any pain or irritation. Come back in about a week and I'll take those stitches out."

_____

"You can stay here." Lexa introduced Luna to a spare room. "I have two trusted guards right outside. They will see to it that no one comes in and you can ask them for anything you might need."

"Thank you." Luna replied.

"I saw to it that you got a room with a view." Lexa motioned to the balcony.

Luna smiled and walked outside. Clarke watched the entire exchange and imagined Luna would be sleeping out there tonight.

"Lexa and I will come back as soon as we can, but you should try to stay out of sight."

"I understand." Luna supplied.

Clarke and Lexa left her room and walked down to their own. They changed, Clarke checked Lexa's wound for about the 10th time that day and then they proceeded to the assembly room where ambassadors were waiting to be briefed on the situation and the plan.

_____

"What we share with you today must not leave this room." Lexa began as she sat in her throne with Clarke by her side. The ambassadors were all situated in their chairs and before Lexa had entered the room, they'd clearly been gossiping with one another about what was going on. No doubt the ambassadors that had been along for the ride had begun filling them in. "Many of you will remember that there was an 9th Nightblood at my conclave and that she fled before the conclave could begin." She paused. "My sister, Luna has been in hiding and while I believed her dead, it was recently brought to my attention that she is alive." There were a few gasps, but not many. Clarke looked at a couple of ambassadors and could tell they were faking their surprise to cover for their gossiping. "It has also come to our attention that Ontari of Azgeda has returned and has murdered three of our people including Roan, the former king of Azgeda, his brother and his second." There were more gasps this time. "She also attacked me yesterday while I was searching for my sister to bring her to Polis under my protection." Lexa turned to Clarke.

"Ontari will face justice for her actions and we will mourn our dead, but we must control the message to our people." Clarke began. "We have had peace. We know what it's like now. It's no longer a dream or a hope. It's our reality." She sighed. "If people find out someone is threatening that; they start to believe it's something that can be threatened. It becomes weak and they question it. To keep our peace, we need to find Ontari, bring her to justice for what she's done, but not reveal all that she's done." Clarke hoped they understood her. She saw a few nods from ambassadors and looked to Octavia who also nodded. She looked behind Lexa where Indra was standing and watched as she nodded at her as well.

"We have sent a search party to find Ontari, but our surrounding woods are large. We will need more warriors to go on the search, but we need to ensure they are trusted. We need only tell them that Ontari murdered her former king and the others, but we will not reveal the reasons we believe she did so. She should be caught and brought here as quickly as possible." Lexa explained. "You will all remain here until this has been resolved for your protection."  
"Heda, our people!" One of the ambassadors addressed with concern.

"Are not in danger. Ontari seeks power. She seeks the throne of Polaris. Attacking your people will not give that to her." She motioned toward Indra.

"I have arranged for horses for each of you." Indra walked forward. "You will go by guard to meet with your warriors and return with the ones you trust. We will meet outside of Polis, plan our search and find the traitor. You'll return here at Heda's orders."

"Luna will remain in Polis for her protection as well." Lexa stood.

"She is here?" An ambassador asked.

Lexa nodded.

"Why do you think Ontari went after her?" It was Lexa. "Did she really think Luna would take her side?" They'd revealed what they knew of Ontari's plan to Octavia already.

"It does no good to attempt to understand her motivations at this time." Lexa acknowledged.

"Luna has helped us." Clarke stood as well. "She is also a Nightblood. Ontari is attempting to rid all of her competition for the throne."

"What of the other Nightbloods?" An ambassador lamented.

"They are safe." Lexa put out. "They have been given rooms here and are under guard."

"We believe Ontari has been working at achieving her goal for a while now. She attempted to reach out to those she believed could help her, but if they didn't agree to her plan, she killed them or at least attempted too." Clarke looked at Lexa for a moment thoughtfully and then remembered where she was and returned her focus to the ambassadors.

"Ontari wishes to return to the old ways of blood must have blood and we must not allow her to be successful." Lexa added. "See to your orders." She commanded. "And if we discover that Ontari has been aided by anyone in this room…" She paused for effect. "They will receive her punishment." Her gaze was intense as she scanned the room. "I will protect this peace and our people."

Indra walked toward the door and the ambassadors lined up to follow her. Octavia turned toward Clarke and Lexa.

"I want to go on the search."

"Octavia, you are an ambassador." Lexa reminded her.

"I'm trained. They're not."

"Octavia, we can't give you special treatment any more than we already have." Clarke added. "You should find the people you can trust and come back."

"I didn't realize that by becoming an ambassador, I'd be taken out of the fight." Octavia retorted clearly frustrated.

Lexa approached her.

"Octavia, my hope is that there will be no fight." She paused and reached out her hand. "If there is though, I would prefer for our fiercest warriors to be by our side." She finished. Octavia knew she was being placated, but she reached out her hand and exchanged the custom with her Commander before turning to leave the room. "Who do you think is helping Ontari?" Lexa asked Clarke without turning toward her after they were alone.

"Jasper's ex-girlfriend, but beyond helping get the bug to her, I don't know what else she's done. She couldn't have gotten in here on her own to plant the bug. Someone would have seen her and according to my mom, she's been in the hospital for the past several days. She apparently has a broken collar bone and a shattered leg."

"Ontari."

"Yes." Clarke agreed. "It's likely she wanted to kill her, but was unable to for some reason. Maybe someone interrupted and she had to run. We'll probably never know."

"Who is this room, Clarke?" Lexa turned to her. "It had to be someone we trust enough to allow to move through the building without guard."

"Based on their reactions, I have my suspicions, but they're just suspicions, Lexa."

"You are a great judge of character, Clarke."

"Gaius and Marina." Clarke declared. "They were both close to Nia from what Roan told me. He had a hard time getting them to accept him as king after you killed Nia." She paused. "They were quiet today. They're usually very vocal."

"Do you believe they're working together?"

"I don't know, but I think we should send someone to follow them until we find out."

Lexa nodded. She walked toward the front door and retrieved a guard. She gave him the order and impressed upon him the need for absolute secrecy. He nodded and walked off. She returned to Clarke.

"We should move Luna."

"We just got her here. She's under guard."

"And now they know she's here. If you believe that either of them could be helping Ontari, we should move Luna and once Gaius and Marina return here, we'll keep them under guard."

"Where should we take her? They know about our house now. They were there when you got attacked. They know we took you there."

"There is no where safer than here, is there?" She asked herself more than Clarke. "We will do what they do not expect."

"Which is?"

"We will keep her here, but we'll…"

"Make it seemed as if we've moved her to the house?" Clarke guessed.

"Yes."

"It's a trap."

"Yes." Lexa smiled. "I will have Lincoln begin spreading the rumor immediately. He will know how to do it right. We'll wait and then return home to find out who meets us there."

"And what if it's Ontari and Gaius and Marina or whoever she's working with don't show?"

"Then, it will still be ended and we will find out who betrayed us another way."


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32:

"Station the guards, but they should remain out of sight and we don't want too many or Ontari will notice." Lexa gave the order to Indra as they rode toward their house.

"Sha, Heda." Indra replied.

They rode in a car instead of a horse for cover this time just in case. Raven was driving. She came along to sweep the house again for bugs. Monty remained behind as their engineering contact in case they needed one. Jasper was keeping eyes on his ex in the hospital and Abby was on standby a few miles back with the healer Lexa trusted most and two guards to keep them safe. Clarke hoped none of them were needed today.

"So, just sweep the house and get out of there?" Raven questioned.

"How long will it take?" Clarke asked her from the front seat while Lexa and Indra were in the back.

"Depends. Not long though. The sweeper will check for frequencies that shouldn't be there and since there shouldn't be any frequencies there at all, it should be easy to spot."

"When you're done, remain in the house." Lexa ordered. "It will be safer for you there."

"You can stay in our room until it's done."

Raven turned slightly toward Lexa and then looked at Clarke.

"You guys know my leg's all healed, right? I can fight if you need me too. I know how to shoot." She referenced the small pistol on her hip.

"We know, Raven." Clarke told her. "We're prepared, but we're hoping it doesn't come to that." While Clarke had a knife attached to her hip, she'd opted not to carry a gun. She believed what they'd done to set their trap and prepare for their enemy would be enough.

"I'll hang in your room when I'm done, but I'll keep watch at least through the window. Do my part."

Clarke nodded at her.

_____

Following the ambassadors, Clarke suspected had gotten them nothing. They'd returned to their group, selected a few warriors they trusted and returned as Lexa commanded. She'd seen to it that they were under guard, but at the same level as all other ambassadors so as not to alert them to their suspicions. There had been no sightings of Ontari, but Lincoln has ensured that the rumor of Luna's transfer to the house had been spread as wide as necessary to set their trap. Clarke had asked one of the female warriors with long, brown hair to cloak herself and ride with them. She was currently resting in the back of the car behind Lexa and Indra.

The car pulled up to the house and the guards who followed them on horseback soon arrived. They'd waited to make sure everyone was in place before Indra opened her door.

"I'll check it first." Indra walked ahead with one of the guards. They both drew their swords and proceeded with stealth inside.

The rest of them waited inside the car until Indra emerged and waved them forward. Clarke and Lexa moved the fake Luna with guards surrounding them with swords drawn. Raven was in the group as well and carried her scanner in one hand and had her other hand on the gun at her hip.

They made their way inside the house and fake Luna made her way toward the back to guard the back door. One guard went upstairs to look out one of the windows while the other remained inside at the front. Raven began scanning while everyone remained silent. She was right. It didn't take long. There were no bugs in the house. They were free to speak. Raven took her position in Clarke and Lexa's room looking out the window toward the back woods.

Clarke and Lexa did their best to maintain their calm as they waited and hoped their trap had been believable enough to draw Ontari out.

"You can take the guards off their doors now." Clarke called Lincoln on their phone.

"Got it." Lincoln replied and hung up.

Clarke and Lexa knew that if there were guards on their doors, Marina and/or Gaius wouldn't leave, but they also weren't entirely sure they were involved or were the only ones involved so they told Lincoln to have guards removed from all doors every so often as a shift change. The ambassadors would be able to track the shift changes and know when they were coming. They'd be prepared for this one and then they'd be able to flee and come to the house to help Ontari if they were guilty. Those that weren't would remain in Polis and would be safe still.

They sat on the sofa after Clarke finally convinced Lexa to stop pacing.

"Let me look at it." Clarke motioned to Lexa's shoulder.

"Not now. It's fine." Lexa insisted.

"Fine. At least come with me to the kitchen. I'm hungry."

Lexa nodded and followed Clarke into the kitchen where they had a few things she could choose from.

"You may go." Lexa told the warrior and after a few moments, she and Clarke were alone in the kitchen. Clarke started arranging something for everyone while Lexa took a spot in front of the window to act as their guard.

"Will you eat something with me?"

"We should remain alert, Clarke."

"And to do that, we need energy, Lexa. We get energy from food." Clarke teased.

Lexa turned toward her and smiled, but her smile quickly faded as her eyes returned to the window.

"She's here."

"What?" Clarke stopped what she was doing and rushed to Lexa who was looking toward the training facility she'd had setup in the side yard.

"There were 6 spears there before. There are only 5 now. There were two swords there and one is missing. She's here."

"How do you know? Maybe someone else took them. We didn't lock them up. Maybe a guard has them now."

Lexa turned to Clarke seriously.

"She's here." She repeated. "She's waiting for me."

"What? Where? We have people looking. No one's seen her."

"She's there." Lexa pointed to the spot she'd kept her eye on while talking to Clarke.

The weapons were situated against a pretty basic half wooden wall. There were many of them and Clarke wasn't exactly sure how Lexa had even been sure some were missing.

"I'll get Indra." Clarke turned to run and grab Indra. Before she left the kitchen though, she heard the back door open and turned back to see Lexa walking through it. "Lexa!" She yelled and ran after her.

"Ontari kom Azgeda!" Lexa yelled into the open back yard. "This is what you wanted!" She yelled again. Several guards including Indra emerged from their positions. Their swords were raised. Clarke heard a window open overhead and saw Raven standing there with her gun pointed. Clarke shook her head and Raven lowered it.

"Heda?" Indra questioned as she positioned herself next to Lexa holding strong to her sword.

Clarke watched as a completely camouflaged Ontari stood up. Clarke wondered how Lexa had even seen her. She'd been completely blended into her surroundings. She dropped the large cloth she'd been wearing for cover to the ground and stood near the weapon stash.

"Lexa kom Trikru." She held both the spear and the sword she'd taken. "Oso na hit choda op nodotaim." We meet again.

Clarke looked to her right as she heard a rustling in the bushes.

"Titus?" Clarke questioned, but before she could say or do anything, she watched as a spear entered his body. Lexa stood fast and kept her eyes on Ontari who was laughing wildly. Indra kept guard over her Commander, but Clarke and a couple other guards ran toward the man who was already clinging to life on the ground. "Titus! What are-"

"I saw Heda and I came to help." He gurgled. "I did not notice…" He faded out.

"Why, Titus? You were free." Clarke asked him.

"I vowed to… protect… my Commander. That was my purpose."

"Your Flamekeeper won't survive that, Lexa." Ontari half-yelled.

Clarke looked over to Lexa who she could tell wanted to go to Titus's aid, but could not look away from Ontari.

"Commander, let us-" Indra tried.

"Shof op." Be quiet.

Ontari laughed again. Clarke turned back to Titus and saw that his eyes were closed and he was gone. She placed him down gently, looked at the blood on her hands and turned to walk back toward Lexa.

"Lexa, let them take her." Clarke nearly begged. She knew her wife. She knew what was about to happen. They had a plan though and Lexa's actions were going against it.

"You know why I am here." Ontari proclaimed. "Will you use your guards?"

"Ai laik Heda. Non na throu daun gon ai." I am Commander. No one fights for me.

Clarke immediately flashed back to the day Lexa was slated to fight Roan. That was one of the many days back then she thought she might lose her.

"Lexa, you don't have to do this." Clarke took her hand, but Lexa let it go and glared at her.

"Yes, I do." She looked at her wife. "Clarke, this will be the end."

Lexa took steps toward Ontari with her hand on her sword.

"Soulou gonplei." Single combat. Ontari pointed her long sword in Lexa's direction.

"Clarke, she's injured. She won't be able to-" Indra turned to Clarke.

Clarke looked at Indra and then up to Raven who was still watching. She regretted her decision to only bring a knife to this fight. She caught Raven's eye and motioned to her. Without words, Raven understood her and she dropped the gun to the ground next to Clarke.

She had a decision to make. Lexa and Ontari were not paying any attention to her. She could shoot Ontari head on and be done with this or she could let Lexa fight her. She knew Lexa. She knew that if she killed Ontari against Lexa's wishes, it would make Lexa look weak in front of everyone here. She knew Lexa would never stand for that. She also knew that despite how unbelievably worried she was about what Lexa was about to do, she had to let her do this.

"Then, let's make it a fair fight." Clarke declared and raised the gun. She fired one bullet. Everyone around registered the sound and many ducked down while others looked around for the shooter. Lexa turned to see Clarke with the gun in the air and then turned back to see Ontari had been hit in the shoulder.

"You realize that even if you kill me, you will never be Commander." Lexa proclaimed as she approached the dirt she'd setup to practice her fighting.

"Titus and Luna may have decided to not stand with me. Titus has already paid for that with his life and soon will your coward sister, but others understand my value and will support me." She pressed her hand to her wound, but stood fast with her sword now in her other hand. "This is only the beginning."

Clarke walked closer.

"Gaius and Marina?" She asked once close enough for Ontari to hear her. Ontari seemed surprised.

"You missed your target, Sky Girl."

"No, she didn't." Lexa replied for Clarke. "Gaius and Marina will be dealt with as will the girl you had help you listen to us."

Ontari looked around and seemed confident in her glance. This caused Clarke to look around as well. She saw people dressed in dark browns and greens; the colors Gaius and Marina often dressed in themselves, emerge from the woods.

"Lexa…" Clarke continued to watch as more and more came out from the woods. These were undoubtedly the warriors Gaius and Marina sent to find Ontari. They each held a weapon or two in their battle ready hands.

"Gaius and Marina!" Lexa yelled and they all watched as the two ambassadors also came out of the woods. "You've chosen your sides." Lexa seethed.

"Nou Heda noumou." Commander no longer. Ontari laughed again. "You see, Lexa. It's not just me that knows Ice Nation's rightful place is on the throne. I was prepared to yield to Roan if he took you down and became Commander himself, but he failed me. His brother did too." She pressed her hand back to her wound. Clarke could tell she was trying not to show that she was in pain. "No matter. They didn't deserve to be Commander. They were not Nightbloods."

"You would have killed them later anyway." Clarke pointed out.

"As I will kill you for thinking you can be a Commander when you have no blood right too it."

"No more talking." Lexa rushed toward Ontari and their swords clanged in the silence. Indra began to move toward the fight, but Clarke held her back. She motioned with her head to her hand, which still held the gun Raven had come prepared with. She'd use it if she had too.

The warriors moved toward the fight with Gaius and Marina while they pushed Lexa's guards along with them until there was a loose circle around the sword fight.

Ontari's wound was clearly worse than Lexa's since Lexa's had had days to heal and was only from an arrow. Before the warriors could get too close, Clarke tucked the small pistol inside her pocket, but kept her hand there near it. She turned back to see that Raven had been joined by a warrior dressed in green. He was standing behind her with his arm around her neck holding her in place. She could tell Raven was trying to hold in her fear. Clarke couldn't worry about that now. She turned back to watch Ontari land a blow to Lexa's face with her free fist. She took a step forward, but Gaius was next to her now and held his sword near her throat.

"This is how we decide Commander. There is no unification ceremony. There is no blood mixed with blood and bandaged. There is blood that leads to death." He explained to her.

Lexa's sword met Ontari's again and she twisted and was able to get her elbow into Ontari's hip causing the girl to move backwards, but only temporarily before she regained her footing.

"You thought you could just change everything? You were wrong." Ontari swung wildly and scraped Lexa's injured arm. Clarke watched the tear in the shirt occur and she saw a small cut with black blood dripping. "I shouldn't have shot at you. I realize my mistake, but I saw you and it was too easy. I had a chance. I took it."

Lexa made her way toward the rest of the weapons and heaved a spear in Ontari's direction. Ontari dove out of the way and hopped up quickly. The spear landed in the dirt behind her. She came at Lexa again and their swords continued doing battle despite the fact that their injuries were clearly causing them both problems.

"How much longer are you going to let this go on?" Indra muttered to Clarke under her breath.

"Your coward sister will be next!" Ontari screamed. She pushed Lexa back with her sword and Lexa almost stumbled. "I will take your ambassadors and your generals and everyone who ever supported your command and I will tie them to trees and allow all of those loyal to Ice Nation to get in their cuts until their blood flows into a river." She pushed Lexa back further. Clarke's hand jerked in her pocket. "Then, I will take your Sky Girl and I will allow my men to have their-"

Lexa lunged at her. Her sword clanged against Ontari's, but only for a moment before she landed a blow and turned them around on the dirt. She'd managed a cut on Ontari's leg. She swung again and scraped her right arm. She took a few steps backwards and gripped the spear she'd thrown earlier with her injured arm. With her sword arm, she lifted it high above her as Ontari attempted to slice her down the middle and the metal met there as Lexa pulled the buried spear from the dirt and stuck it straight into Ontari's left leg. The girl backed up and yelped loudly in pain. Clarke felt the sword near her neck move closer to it as Gaius noticed his leader had been dealt a bad blow. She reached into her pocket and gripped the weapon. Lexa swung at Ontari's sword and knocked it out of her hand. She held her own sword at the girl's neck and reached for the sword in the dirt and then held them together at her neck placing her in a sword choke hold.

"You've made more than one mistake today, Ontari." Lexa told her. "You thought you could defeat me. You thought your plan would work. You thought your thirst for power was enough to overtake my desire for peace. You are no Commander. You never will be." She gripped the swords tighter while the girl's black blood still poured from her leg. "Now!" Lexa yelled.

Each of her guards moved fast and dropped their swords or bows and instead reached for the guns they'd had tucked in their pants and held them at the surrounding warriors. Clarke pointed her pistol at Gaius. Even Indra held her gun at Marina.

"Drop it." Clarke ordered Gaius. One by one, the people with Ontari dropped their weapons to the ground recognizing that they had been outmatched. They'd had each guard carry a gun, but many resisted the idea recalling their beliefs that yielding a gun would only do them harm. Clarke and Lexa had explained the importance of being prepared for anything, but the compromise they agreed upon was that none of the guns the guards carried were actually loaded. Of course, their enemies didn't know that and Raven's gun had been loaded and that was the one that mattered as it reminded Clarke to look toward the window and didn't see anything. "Raven!" She yelled as she turned. Then, she saw her pop up. She was holding her jaw.

"I'm okay. He's not."

"Go." Clarke commanded a guard to go help Raven. He ran toward the house. She turned her attention back to Lexa and walked toward the two Nightbloods.

"Go ahead and kill me, Lexa. You know I will try again if you let me live. I will have my vengeance for my queen and for all of Ice Nation."

Lexa pulled the spear out of her leg causing the girl to scream out in pain again. Lexa held it to her stomach.

"This is how you killed Titus. This is how you should die as well."

Ontari could see Clarke approach out of the corner of her eye without turning her head.

"This is the one who ruined our world. She convinced you that blood must not have blood. Are you here to tell her to spare me, Sky Girl?"

Clarke stared down at her.

"No." Clarke replied. "You're right. You will try again. You are dangerous. You should die for this."

Ontari laughed.

"Wanheda returns!" She declared with yet another wicked laugh and Clarke knew for certain that being raised by Nia and years in hiding had indeed made Ontari less than sane.

"Those of you who supported this coup will be imprisoned. Gaius and Marina, you will never see freedom again." Lexa looked at both of them and then returned her glance to Ontari. "You will have to live with what you've done here-"

Ontari gripped the spear and shoved it down into her own stomach causing Clarke to gasp and Lexa to take a step back.

"I will not be jailed by you!" Ontari gurgled as black blood filled her mouth. "I will join Nia in the afterlife and plan our… return." She gurgled and spat out blood. They watched as she faded for a moment and then died; her lifeless hands falling to the ground.


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33:

After a moment, Lexa pulled out the spear. She threw it to the ground along with Ontari's sword. She sheathed her own and turned away from the body toward those gathered around it.

"This coup is dead. Your leader is dead. You will all suffer now and for what?" Lexa asked them loudly as she turned and turned to take them all in. "Power without purpose is not power at all. Ontari lost this battle because she failed to understand that. Power means nothing." She turned toward Clarke. "Because she had nothing to fight for." She said that more softly. "Take them away!" She yelled and Clarke turned around to watch Lexa's supporters grab and usher Ontari's warriors away from the woods and toward the path back to Polis.

"Are you okay?" Clarke waited until they were mostly alone in the backyard before approaching her wife and gripping the sides of her face.

"I am fine."

"Lexa, you didn't have to fight her. We-"

"What I did was important, Clarke." She pulled Clarke's hands down and held onto them. "Anyone who doubted me before will not now. They needed a reminder of my strength in battle. They needed to know that I could still lead them in war despite the fact that we have peace. We will be safe." She took one hand and placed it gently on Clarke's cheek. "But I'm glad you shot her."

Clarke laughed lightly and then reached out to hug her.

"Please, never again." Clarke tried to get her to agree.

"What happened? I heard a gun shot!" It was Abby running with her bag toward them. "I got here as fast as I could." She looked at Ontari. "What happened?" She repeated out of breath.

"It is over. Ontari is dead. The plan worked." Lexa proclaimed. "We will once again have peace."

"Mom, look at her please." Clarke moved away from Lexa. Abby rushed toward her and quickly checked her wounds.

"She'll be fine. You popped your stitches so I need to fix that and bandage this." She motioned toward the other wound. "But you'll be fine. Come on." She tried to pull her toward the house where she could work on her.

"We should return to Polis."

"Lexa, I swear to God if you don't get in that house and let my mom bandage you up after you just risked your life, I…" She stopped herself.

Abby smirked at the ground.

"Let's go." Lexa agreed and followed Abby inside reluctantly, but not wanting to put Clarke through any more than she already had that day. She'd always trusted her skills in battle. She never doubted that she would best Ontari. She knew that what she'd said to everyone was right. Ontari had nothing really to fight for. Lexa had Clarke and her love for her had once again given her strength.

_____

Clarke remained outside knowing Lexa would be taken care of. She helped Indra and the others make sure all warriors were without weapons and arranged a caravan of sorts to get them back to Polis.

"Do we have enough space to hold them?" Clarke asked Indra once many of them were already moving.

"Would you mind if they were crammed together until we can build a prison that will accommodate anyone that violates our laws?" Indra smirked at her.

"I wouldn't mind that at all." Clarke replied with a nod and went back inside to check on Lexa.

"How's the patient?" She asked her mom who was giving Lexa water.

"She's stubborn, but she's fine."

"We should return to Polis." Lexa stood. Her arm was bandaged in two places now.

"We can wait a while." Clarke returned. "You should come outside first. They're about to take away the body."

"Why would-" She started and then remembered. Clarke wasn't talking about Ontari's body. She was talking about Titus's.

They walked out the back door and Clarke asked the two guards that were about to move him to wait.

"I'll give you some time."

Clarke stood back as Lexa knelt beside Titus. She leaned down and whispered something in his ear. Clarke was sure it was Yu gonplei ste odon. Your fight is over. Lexa stood and motioned to the men that they could carry on. She turned to see that Ontari's body had already been removed.

"What did they do with her?" Lexa asked.

"I told them to take her far into the woods and burn the body where no one could see the smoke."

"You are very wise, Clarke kom Skaikru."

"So are you." Clarke replied and held onto Lexa's hand. "How are you?"

Lexa looked back to Titus.

"His death was random. He should not have come here. This should not have been. It served no purpose."

Clarke thought about telling her that he'd told her he'd lived his purpose and telling her that he died for Lexa and her dream of peace, but she knew it would make no difference to someone who was grieving a person they cared for deeply. Despite what had happened between them after Titus's misguided actions, she knew Lexa still cared for the man. A person's last words before death, though impactful on the ones they've left behind, act only as memories that their death occurred to begin with; that they were gone. Lexa was right. Titus did not have to meet his end in this way. He could have died in battle or by his beloved Commander's side.

"Let's go back to Polis." She offered Lexa instead.

_____

They returned and spent many hours organizing the prisoners and trying to explain what had happened to the remaining ambassadors. They'd need to find three more to replace Roan, Gaius and Marina, but that would wait. First, Lexa would have to explain to the people what had happened to them and the others who were now imprisoned. She'd have to explain Ontari's actions and her death and Clarke knew that was a difficult task to ask of her.

Luna was able to join them for dinner. She'd finally changed out of the only clothes Clarke had ever seen her in and she looked as if she'd bathed as well. Maybe she was getting more comfortable indoors.

"What will happen to me now?" She asked after taking a drink at their table on the balcony Lexa had setup for them.

"What do you want to happen?" Lexa asked her.

"I'd like to light the pyre for Titus's funeral."

"You may." Lexa granted.

"And then… I think I'd like to remain in Polis."

"Really?" Clarke asked.

"Not here. I think I'd like to build a place of my own."

Lexa nodded at her, but Clarke caught a smile in there somewhere.

"What do you plan to do?" Clarke asked Luna.

"I don't know. I may be good in teaching people to hunt or-"

"You trained to be a Commander." Lexa interjected.

"Lexa…"

"Luna, you are a Nightblood and my sister. You trained to be a Commander."

"Lexa, I do not wish-"

"I know you do not seek the throne. I'm merely offering you an ambassadorship."

Clarke nodded then.

"I have not lived in Polis for a long time."

"But you know our ways. You trained with the other Nightbloods. You can be a part of our continued peace if you wish it."

"I will consider it." Luna replied after a long moment.

"You can still teach people to hunt." Clarke informed.

Luna nodded this time.

_____

"Ambassadors." Lexa greeted upon entering the room, for the first time holding Clarke's hand as she did so. "We have much to discuss." They sat in their chairs and the ambassadors sat after them. "Clarke and I have discussed at length how to handle the Ontari situation." She looked toward Clarke.

"We don't want her glorified. We don't want people to speak her name." She paused. "We won't mention it outside this room or in meetings with the prisoners."

"The prisoners will remain here temporarily. A prison will be commissioned and built at the edge of our lands. These prisoners as well as any others who disobey Polaris law will be sent there to serve their just sentences."

"And what of Gaius and Marina?" An ambassador asked.

"They have betrayed their Commanders and their people. They will never be free again." Lexa answered. "The others may have a chance to achieve freedom, but only after lengthy punishments; after the name Ontari has long been forgotten."

"What of their families? What will they be told of their crimes?"

"They can visit with their family members and hear it from their mouths. I do not plan on lying to any of them."

"What if they mention Ontari?"

"We will suggest they do not, but they must own their actions and if they reveal the depth of them to their loved ones, that is their choice. I will not speak Ontari's name at any assemblies or beyond the needs of discussing this current situation." Lexa explained. "We will control the message as we determine we need too."

_____

Several days later, Clarke walked around Polis. She had her cloak covering her face and was unattended. She didn't do this often and Lexa discouraged it, but she wanted to get a feel for the mood of the people. She heard a few mentions of the people they'd imprisoned, but no mention of Ontari's name, which made her grateful. Many of the prisoners expressed regret at helping their ambassadors. They'd been fed lies and now that they'd been told the truth and were being treated fairly, the seemed to understand the importance of keeping all the details to themselves. Clarke wandered for a few hours; taking in the sights and the smells of the city. She watched Raven and Wick walk past arguing about something. They didn't even notice her. She listened in for fun and discovered it was more a couple's spat than anything and she smiled. Octavia and Lincoln were leaving the museum.

"I'll never tell her this, but she's really good." Octavia told him as he took her hand.

"She captured our history well." He spoke back and Clarke realized they were talking about her art.

_____

She found herself walking back toward the library late into the evening. When she arrived, she found Lexa there waiting for her.

"You've been spending a lot of time in here recently. I thought maybe you'd tell me why tonight."

Clarke smiled, lowered her hood and sat down next to her wife who looked beautiful in the soft, flickering candle light.

"I've been trying to find a place to take you on our honeymoon." She confessed to a confused looking Lexa. She smiled at her. "A vacation for you and me. Alone. Away from all this."

"You want to take a vacation?" Lexa snickered.

"I want us to take a vacation, Lexa. You're nearly healed. Things are calm here again, but we never know exactly how long that's going to last. We should take advantage of it."

"How long would we be gone for?"

"I haven't thought about that part yet, but probably not too long."

"What were you thinking about then?"

Clarke laid her head in Lexa's lap and Lexa started brushing her hair back from her face.

"Somewhere close, but not too close that people could find us." Clarke began and Lexa smiled down at her. "Somewhere we could explore. I've been looking at locations in these books that meet that criteria. I just don't know how many of them exist anymore so we could end up going someplace that looks great in history books, but is actually a pile of rubble."

"That would be okay with me."

It was Clarke's turn to be confused.

"Really?" She asked.

"We could just walk among the rubble and discover what remains. We could sleep under the stars." She slid her free hand under Clarke's shirt. "We could take full advantage of the solitude."

Clarke smiled and laughed lightly.

"You'd really consider it?" She checked.

"We deserve it." Lexa stated confidently. "More than just surviving, right?"

"Yes." Clarke replied and placed a hand on top of Lexa's arm on her stomach.

"Indra will remain in Polis and act in our stead. I'm sure Octavia will assist her where needed and Luna has agreed to become an ambassador after more time in our city so she could use this as a learning experience."

Clarke shot up with excitement. She reached over to the pile of books she'd stacked up before and found the one she was looking for. Lexa just held her hand against the small of Clarke's back as if somehow that would keep her from falling off the sofa.

"This book has a list of old museums." She passed it to Lexa who sat it in her lap. "This one has national landmarks. Mostly natural stuff. Rivers, mountains, waterfalls, that kind of thing." Clarke sat another book there. Lexa just watched her and smiled. "This one has places that are a little further away, but we could go by car and I don't think we'd be gone too long." A third book was placed on Lexa's lap. "We should look through them and pick where we want to go." Clarke finally settled back into a sitting position next to her wife. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?" She glared at Lexa.

"Because I love you."

"Oh." Clarke didn't know how to respond.

"Which is your favorite?" Lexa asked her referring to the books.

"I can't decide. It would be nice to get far away, but I don't know if we can do that right now so I'd settle for a good museum and those stars you were talking about." She rested her head against Lexa's shoulder and began opening a book.

"Then, we will find a museum and some stars this time."

"This time?" Clarke lifted her head to look up at her.

"Yes, Clarke. This time."

Clarke leaned in and kissed her then. Lexa was referring to taking not one but possibly many vacations with her over the course of their life together. She wanted to move to do more, but there were now books in Lexa's lap.

"We can pick a place later." She suggested and shoved the books onto the floor while she took in the sound of Lexa's laughter and the beauty of her eyes still reflecting the flickering light.

The End


	34. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you to everyone who read this story, followed/favorited it and/or left a review. When I first started this, I thought it might be a lengthy one-shot. As much as I missed Lexa and these two, I had no idea how much I had to say about it. I hope to write more about them one day when another story enters my brain, but just in case, I wanted to give them the happy ending we know that a show like The 100 cannot provide. I hope this offered some relief to those who grieve with me for the loss of such an amazing character in Lexa and for the remarkable relationship between two strong, female characters who led their people and happened to fall in love.
> 
> I've written a few non-fanfics and posted them on Inkitt. They are lesbian romance and a series 1-4 as of now. You don't have to read them in order, but it helps. If you're interested, you can check them out on Inkitt by searching for the titles:
> 
> 1\. Fresh Start
> 
> 2\. When Literature Met Math
> 
> 3\. Just Tell Her
> 
> 4\. When Love Walked into The Lantern
> 
> Or view my profile and get to them here: https://www.inkitt.com/NicoleMarie.

Epilogue:

It took several weeks after Ontari's death for Lexa to feel comfortable leaving Polaris for what they'd been calling a vacation, but those that knew him kept referring to a honeymoon. The plans for the prison were well underway, Kane and Murphy had returned from their voyage with news of lands that might be good for farming. The 3rd hospital for Polaris had been opened and Abby had healers training former Sky People in their ways while their doctors trained future healers about modern medicine in hopes that eventually there would be no distinction between the two.

Since that day on the training ground outside their home, much work had been done. Ontari's blood had been removed and new dirt had been laid down. Clarke had even taken a few lessons in sword fighting from Lexa although they used wooden swords in their practice and the lessons often ended up with Lexa mock-defeating her and Clarke laughing at how bad she was with a sword. Indra, it turned out, was a master with a bow though and Clarke took to that better than the sword. Lexa had spent a several hours just watching her practice and laughing when Clarke got aggravated with herself on a missed shot. They'd even gone hunting together and Luna had joined them; teaching them a few of the traps she'd laid during her time in hiding. Clarke and Luna found themselves connected in the fact that they both had to spend time on their own.

Their bed had been moved to their new bedroom, which was slightly smaller than their old room and therefore made the bed look even larger than it had appeared to them in Polis, but they liked having it at home despite that fact. A new bed had been created for their room that they'd keep in Polis.

Luna had grown more comfortable living in the city and people had stopped staring at her for the most part. She'd been called Commander several times though and started wearing a cloak a deep shade of green so that people could tell the difference between them. Lexa did not seem to mind that people confused her sister for her, but that didn't really surprise Clarke. Lexa never cared about power or recognition; only that her people were cared for and that she did her duty to them well.

"The woman died yesterday morning in her home. She was of the old ways and did not trust the new hospitals. I believe she would be happy with this possibility." Luna explained to Lexa as they sat in the backyard of the house. Clarke was taking another lesson from Indra who was scolding her for holding the bow incorrectly. "Have you discussed this with her yet?" Luna looked toward Clarke and then back to her sister.

"There was no need to at the time. This information changes that." Lexa replied and watched her wife hit the center of the target. Lexa smiled at her when Clarke glanced over at them with a look of confusion on her face.

"Her husband met with bad fortune last month. The animal came out of nowhere while he was on a hunt."

"I will speak with Clarke when we are away."

"You should know that Abby is aware."

"Clarke has already said her goodbye to her mother. We leave today. I should have the opportunity to discuss this with her."

"And what if Abby-"  
"Please ask her to wait until our return."

"Won't that cause her to guess at your intentions?" Luna asked her.

"Possibly." Lexa stood from her chair. "I should say goodbye to you now. We need to leave before sunset."

Luna stood as well and Clarke turned her attention to the sisters just in time to see them embrace and pull apart. She handed her bow to Indra and approached them.

"Are you ready?" She asked Lexa.

"Yes, I was just wrapping up Polis business with Luna."

"I will take care of our people until your return." She assured both of them.

Clarke smiled and hugged her goodbye.

"Are you ready to return to Polis, ambassador?" Indra checked as she approached.

"I am." Luna replied.

"Next time, Clarke, you will hold your bow properly and we will take the target back further. You must be able to hit your targets more quickly and accurately every time." Indra delivered in true general form.

Clarke resisted a smile.

"I look forward to it." She replied.

Indra nodded at her Commanders and walked away with Luna.

"We should depart as well." Lexa took a step toward Clarke.

"What were you and Luna talking about? She seemed concerned."

"She just worries about both of us being gone, but I assured her Polaris is in good hands and we will not be gone long. You are improving." Lexa motioned toward the target behind them and changed the subject.

"Indra's a good teacher."

"She has told me that you are a good student." Lexa began walking back toward the house and opened the door for Clarke to walk through.

"She told you that?" Clarke sounded surprised.

Lexa closed the back door behind them and picked up one of the bags they'd be taking with them off of the kitchen table.

"She did." She followed Clarke toward the front of the house where this time Clarke opened the door and watched as Lexa walked through.

They both observed Luna and Indra riding off toward Polis along with a guard Lexa had insisted remain with Luna at all times when she was not in Polis. It was a temporary measure and Luna understood that it was only for her continued protection. Clarke picked up a two bags they had left by the car they'd be taking and they loaded all the bags inside the vehicle alongside many large containers of gasoline to allow them to make their voyage.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Clarke asked her.

"Yes, do you have them?" Lexa answered.

Clarke smiled and handed Lexa the keys to the car.

"The last time you tried, it took Raven two days to fix it." She remarked about the car. Lexa had asked for driving lessons and Clarke had delivered, but Lexa failed to grasp the concept of driving and had managed to stall the car twice. Raven had to come out to the house and fix the thing.

"I am determined to also be a good student." She took the keys from Clarke's hand.

Clarke laughed at her and took her seat on the passenger's side. Watching Lexa look over the vehicle to prepare to drive away was something that always made her laugh. She angled the mirror, turned the key in the ignition, examined the gauges in front of her and then put the car into reverse and stepped lightly on the gas pedal.

"Lexa!" Clarke nearly yelled.

Lexa realized her mistake and put the car in drive instead. Clarke laughed again and once Lexa had a handle on things and they'd driven past Indra and Luna before turning the car in the other direction to go on their trip, Clarke took one of Lexa's hands in her own.

_____

Several hours later, Clarke was at the wheel and Lexa's eyes were staring out the window at a part of the world she had never seen. Clarke, too, had never been this far outside of the lands Lexa and she now commanded, but she was content to focus on the road ahead and allow Lexa the freedom to explore with her eyes.

After making their way through the woods and driving along paths that had been barely wide enough for a vehicle to pass, they'd found a road. The road was riddled with weeds and the occasional tree growing out of cracked cement, but it was a road nonetheless. Bomb debris was a frequent occurrence and they'd had to stop the car a few times to remove items to continue on, but after driving for most of the afternoon and evening, they'd found themselves driving with a moon full in the sky and headlights urging them forward.

"We should stop soon. We have to add gas to the tank anyway. Might as well find somewhere to make camp and do that in the morning." Clarke explained. She heard no reply and turned to look at her wife who had fallen asleep. Clarke laughed silently and slowly pulled the car to a stop trying not to wake her. She should have remembered who she was married too though.

"Why have we stopped?" Lexa snapped to attention.

Clarke opened her door and turned back to her.

"Go back to sleep. I'm just going to find a place for us to make camp for the night. I'll be right back."

Lexa's door opened and she climbed out of the car deciding not to listen to Clarke.

"We should move the car off the road." She looked around.

"Lexa, there's no one here." Clarke reminded her. Lexa looked at her. Clarke could make her as well as their surroundings out by the light of the moon. The light had caught Lexa in just the right way. Her eyes were illuminated while the light danced off her skin since she'd removed her coat earlier in their drive and it was a warm night. "Wow." Clarke uttered.

"What?" Lexa sought clarification.

"You're just… wow." Clarke shrugged her shoulders. "We should-"

"Find somewhere to camp." Lexa completed and they both walked toward the back of the car to unload their belongings.

They walked for a few minutes. They had flashlights which helped them to step over bricks, plants, large cement blocks that had once been a building of some kind and they found themselves two large cement blocks that had fallen to form a kind of makeshift arch. Plants had grown over the top of them and a little inside so they trusted that it was well supported. They sat their bags down inside their shelter for the night and then made a small fire outside using wood found nearby and Clarke sat between Lexa's legs while the girl's arms wrapped around her. They ate a small meal and then laid back against blankets they'd brought with them.

"What was it like up there?" Lexa asked her after several moments of silence. Lexa's head was against Clarke's shoulder and while she was gazing at the stars, she was also nuzzling herself into her shoulder more and more the sleepier she got.

"Space?" Clarke pressed her lips to the top of Lexa's head.

"Being among the stars." She clarified in a sleepy tone, which Clarke had come to recognize and love.

"It didn't feel that way." She started and raised a blanket up to Lexa's shoulders as she felt the girl shudder slightly as a cool breeze picked up. The fire had begun to fizzle, but Clarke made no attempt to reignite it. She knew they'd be asleep soon.

"What did it feel like?"

"It was home. It was all I knew. I never stepped foot out of the ship. Raven did though. You should ask her what it was like."

"I'd rather hear it from you." Lexa lifted her head slightly, but it was enough to kiss Clarke's cheek and lay it back down.

"I always wanted to go out." Clarke began. "I used to look out the windows with my dad. He'd been taught the constellations, but you couldn't exactly tell what was what through the window. So, he'd just lie or guess and I would pretend that I believed him." She paused at the memory of her father. "I went to the library onboard once and found a book on the solar system and found out he had no idea what he was talking about." She laughed lightly. Lexa wrapped her arm even more tightly around Clarke's stomach. "He'd made it all up. He'd given them funny names like Apricotus and Belgius." She smiled as she stared at the night sky. "No one had taught him about the stars."

Lexa's body twisted a little and she stared straight up at the sky.

"Tell me what we're looking at."

"How would I know?" Clarke asked her as she turned her head to look at Lexa.

"Because you're you." Lexa turned to look back at her. "Tell me."

Clarke smiled and Lexa turned her attention back to the sky.

"I studied the book and tried to teach him." She pointed up at the sky and started naming what she remembered from the book until she felt Lexa's breathing slow, kissed her head one more time and fell asleep shortly after.

_____

Lexa felt something cool hit her face and then she felt it again and again and she opened her eyes to discover that with morning had come rain. Clarke's eyes opened too and before they knew it, rain was falling fast and hard. They gathered their blankets and ran toward the shelter they'd failed to use. They watched as the sky remained gray and they laid the blankets out under their roof. Despite them being only slightly wet, from the unexpected downpour, Clarke pulled out fresh clothes for both of them. She turned to see that Lexa seemed unconcerned with changing. She was content to just sit there and watch the rain.

"I don't think I've ever seen you look so…" Clarke started and then tried to find the right word while Lexa turned back to look at her. "Free."

"That seems to make you happy." Lexa replied. "Do you wish I was like this all the time?"

Clarke moved toward her. She suddenly had no interest in the clothes she'd been removing from their bag.

"I still can't believe I get to see you like this at all." She put her hand on Lexa's shoulder and moved to push her back to lie down while Clarke moved on top of her. "Do you want to get out of those wet clothes?" Clarke pressed her lips to Lexa's neck. She felt Lexa giggle against her body and then felt her arms wrap around her body pulling her closer.

"Where should we go now?" Clarke asked as they climbed quickly inside the car to avoid the rain. She didn't trust Lexa's driving skills in this weather so Lexa took her position on the passenger's side.

"Wherever this road takes us." Lexa answered her.

_____

Clarke drove them through the rain. They stopped briefly to eat and feel the sun against their skin. They bathed in a deep stream, but mainly played in the water and then dried themselves by the sun before beginning again. They continued on with Lexa behind the wheel this time. It was late evening when they stopped for the night, ate again and then made their way into a large building that had collapsed on one side, but appeared to still be mostly intact. They couldn't see much beyond their flashlights so they setup for the night and decided to sleep before they'd explore.

"You've really never traveled beyond Polaris before?" Clarke questioned while Lexa laid out their blankets for the night.

"When would I have done that, Clarke?"  
Clarke realized her question might have been a ridiculous one.

"Was there anywhere you read about that you would have liked to have seen?" She asked instead.

"You mean from before the bombs?"

"Yes."

Lexa took a seat on the blankets and patted the spot next to her for Clarke to join.

"I never really thought about it." She replied truthfully.

"Because you're the Commander?" Clarke asked her.

"A Commander now." Lexa corrected. "And yes. Neither Luna nor I thought about what might have been."

"And now?" Clarke pushed Lexa's hair back off her shoulder revealing her long neck.

Lexa gulped.

"Now, I think about our future."

"Polaris is-"

"No, Clarke." Lexa stopped her and turned until she was facing her while crossing her legs. "I need to ask you something."

Clarke looked concerned.

"What is it?"

Lexa took Clarke's hands and held them in her own. She looked down at them unable to meet her eye.

"A woman died yesterday in Polis."

"What? Why…" Clarke tried to understand why Lexa would be mentioning this to her now.

"Her husband as you would call him, was killed by an animal while on a hunting trip. That's how Luna knew about this. She heard the story when taking others hunting recently."

"Lexa…"

"The woman died of a disease we yet have no cure for." Lexa continued. "They had a young daughter, Clarke."

"Okay." Clarke was still trying to comprehend Lexa's intentions.

"She is a year old. Her name is Hadia and she now has no parents, Clarke."

"Lexa…" Clarke was starting to put it together.

"She's a Nightblood." She paused. "Abby discovered it recently when the girl was brought to the hospital. She ran some tests and discovered it."

"Are you asking what I think you're asking, Lexa?"

"I hadn't planned it this way. I know you said you have everything you want and I feel that way as well, Clarke. You are all that I need and if you do not want this, we will never speak of it again."

"It's not that, Lexa. It's just soon. We just got married."

"Why does that matter?" Lexa was genuinely confused. "We've been together for over four years, Clarke. The date of our wedding is not something that should determine-"

"No, I know. I just…" She took a deep breath. "Are you sure you don't want to… have one? I mean if you want us to have a child, we can talk to my mom. I can't, but-"

"Clarke, I can't." Lexa finished for her.

"Wait. What?" Clarke pulled her hands back from Lexa's.

"Do you remember what Luna told you about me being very sick when I was young?"

"Yes."

"I went back to your mother to check on my wound as you insisted a few weeks ago. She is just as persistent as you and asked me to submit to some tests since I never have before."

"And she told you you can't have children? Why didn't you tell me this?"

"She just told me the results before we left. Apparently, my earlier illness did some long-term damage as did that bullet to you." She paused. "Luna explained to me that the woman was sick. She'd visited her after she heard of her husband's death. The child doesn't have any other family."

"Does my mom know what you're thinking?"

"No, Clarke." Lexa moved to take Clarke's hands back. "Luna knows I was planning to discuss it with you." She paused. "I asked her to make sure Abby watched after Hadia while you and I were gone and it is possible that your mother would guess at my intentions, but I haven't spoken with her about it."

Clarke looked down at their hands now as Lexa sat there intently watching and waiting for her reaction or response.

"Parents?" Clarke thought out loud.

"You know I would never want to pressure you into anything."

Clarke finally looked up at her.

"I guess I just never thought you'd really want this." She admitted.

"As I said before, it was never an option before you, but not only that, Clarke. I never wanted it before you." She paused and reached out for Clarke's neck. "You have changed so much about me. You make me want things I never thought an option before you fell from the sky. I did not have much time with my own parents. They gave us over to Titus and the Commander when we were very young and then they died." She took a deep breath. "She looks like you."

"What?"

"It's remarkable really. She's so young, but I can see it. I believe she will look like you." Lexa replied.

"Hadia?" Clarke asked her and breathed in at the thought.

"Luna had a picture of her."

Cameras were something that many people still did not understand and most of the people who'd lived on the ground before still resisted them, but Abby often took photos of people who visited the hospital; especially the kids. They had a wall of pictures. She considered it her way of trying to help them get used to the concept.

"You've seen her then?"

"I have." Lexa put one hand on Clarke's cheek and the other remained behind her neck. "She already has some blonde hair."

"What color are her eyes?" Clarke asked and watched as Lexa smiled at her wife's interest.

"Green."

Clarke smiled as she looked into her wife's eyes.

"This is crazy." Clarke laughed at the fact that they were talking about this.

"What is this?" Lexa questioned her hopefully.

"You really want to be co-Commanders and parents? You think we can handle all that?"

Lexa moved forward causing Clarke to have to lie back.

"I think we can handle anything, Clarke."

Clarke's arms went around her neck and pulled her down.

"Can we meet her?" She paused. "It's just she might not like us or…" She lifted her head up so that Lexa would take the hint and rest their foreheads together.

"Of course." Lexa kissed her nose.

"And she's a Nightblood?"

"Yes."

"Would she have to…" Clarke hadn't even met the child yet, but already she was thinking about her future.

"You're worried about the conclave." Lexa lifted herself back slightly to catch Clarke's expression.

"We've never talked about what happens after us. The other Nightbloods… would she just be one of them?"

Lexa smiled down at her.

"You are already thinking like a mother." She expressed. "We can discuss with the ambassadors what that plan should entail, but I think we've seen our last conclave."

"Hadia?" Clarke more just said out loud to herself than said to Lexa.

"Do you know what it means?" Lexa asked her while looking down at her.

"No. Do you?"

"Yes."

"Well…" Clarke pretended to shake Lexa lightly to tell her what the name meant.

"It means guide… leader."

"So, no conclave, but you're already planning on her being a Commander one day, aren't you?"

Lexa's smile grew wider as she gently pressed her lips to Clarke's. Clarke's lips moved against them and then she felt Lexa's tongue peek out. Lexa's lips moved to Clarke's neck after several minutes and her hand went under the girl's shirt.

"Perhaps she will be an artist or a Flamekeeper." Lexa suggested into Clarke's ear.

"Maybe we should meet her before we start giving her a profession." Clarke identified. "We should head back tomorrow."

Lexa pulled up to look at her.

"You wanted a honeymoon, Clarke."

"I did, but things change." Clarke reminded her. "We still have tonight. We can explore this place a little tomorrow and then drive back. We'll have to stop for another night before we make it back to Polaris."

"And you'd be okay with that?"

"I'd like to meet her." Clarke proposed.

Lexa nodded.

"Then, we'll begin our journey back to Polaris tomorrow."

_____

Clarke watched Lexa sleep and felt her shiver since they'd failed to get dressed again after they made love and their blankets were somewhat thin. She moved closer to her Commander wife and wrapped a tight arm around her sharing her body heat with her. She kissed the back of Lexa's shoulder and then lightly pressed her lips to her neck. She knew she'd woken her up when she felt Lexa's arm move on top of her own and she placed her fingers between Clarke's; squeezing them together.

As she was finally about to fall asleep, she thought back to her time on the ark. She recalled memories of her parents as she was growing up. There were the times her dad showed her his made up constellations and the times her mom read her stories of old earth before she fell asleep. She thought of everything that had to happen to get her here wrapped around her wife; the woman she loved more than she ever thought possible. She thought about what kind of mother Lexa would be and she knew she would be amazing at it. She'd seen her with the other Nightbloods. She'd watched as she taught them over the years even after the peace. She'd heard from each of them that they loved her and knew they'd give their lives for her and Clarke was grateful that it didn't seem like that would ever be necessary.

She thought about what kind of mother she would be and the thought terrified her. When her mom had told her that the bullet made it extremely unlikely that she'd ever be able to have a baby, she'd been relieved, but also disappointed. Initially, she'd felt as if it didn't matter anyway. She and Lexa had just gotten together and it seemed so unlikely that they'd ever have a conversation about children, but as time wore on and they'd grown closer and she knew they'd spend the rest of their lives together, she'd discovered the disappointment ran deep after all.

When Lexa had brought it up more recently, she figured that they'd discuss it more later and that if they decided to do it, Lexa would have their child, but with that also being an impossibility, Clarke thought about what it would be like to have a baby; a toddler in their home. One that apparently resembled her according to Lexa, but Clarke guessed that was more her wife's wishful thinking than actual resemblance, but she felt herself imagining the small girl's green eyes and wondered if they looked like Lexa's. She smiled and drifted off at the thought.

_____

"Lexa, where are you?" Clarke asked when she woke up and found her wife was missing. "Will you please stop running off before I wake up?" She asked the empty space of a large room that appeared to be made of marbled walls.

"I found something." Lexa's voice came from a far off place. "Clarke?" It was an echo more than a voice.

Clarke stood up reluctantly and felt the sunlight enter through the damaged roof. She squinted her eyes as she continued to examine the space now that she could actually see it.

"Where are you?" She asked her wife.

Clarke didn't receive a response. There were three hallways it appeared off of a giant circular space. The circular space was nearly filled with rubble as was one entrance to a hallway so Clarke took a guess that Lexa was down one of the others.

"Come on!" Lexa encouraged.

"Straight or right?" Clarke yelled.

"Right." Lexa replied.

Clarke took the right hallway stepping over a few marble pieces as she walked. She looked to her left and gasped for a moment before she got a chance to recognize what it was. There was a black panther staring at her. The gasp of fear came before she realized that the animal was dead and appeared to be on some type of display. It was behind broken glass and she looked down the hall as she continued on recognizing other animals as she went. There was a leopard, two white tigers and another cat she couldn't identify on sight. On her right, the displays were more damaged, but she could make out a few other members of the cat family.

"Lexa?" Clarke checked as she walked further on past the displays. There was a turn to the left. She made it since there was no other direction she could go. This room had no animals on display, but instead had different gemstones and rocks. It was darker than the other part of the building, but there was a burst of sunlight from one large hole that gave her enough light to see the brilliant stones before continuing on.

"I'm here." She finally heard the actual voice of her wife instead of an echo, but she heard something else too. "Look."

Clarke moved to Lexa's side and felt the girl take her hand and point with the other. The building had been damaged more severely here. The roof was mainly gone on one side and what they were looking at was a waterfall that had apparently formed after the destruction. Clarke could see the part of a hill or maybe even a mountain had overgrown plants which cascaded along with water into the building. It fell from the sky onto the tiled floor, which had cracked and formed into a small basin that had probably been created through erosion over time and then drained out one of the many holes in the side of the building. Clarke looked around and had to guess that this space was some type of a cafeteria. There was a trash can to her right that appeared to have food related trash in it and there was the opening to some type of restaurant with a menu over a counter that still listed the types of items people had once ordered while they took a break from visiting the museum. There were also tables with attached chairs spread throughout the space. Many of them were too damaged to use and some of them had been piled against one of the larger holes in the wall, which made Clarke wonder what had happened here right after the bombs.

"It must be from the rain." Clarke proposed of the falling water. "It's coming down the side of the mountain and draining off into here. They must have built this place to be right up against it or something." She referred to the mountain.

"It's beautiful."

"I think this was a natural history museum." Clarke guessed. "You're right though. It is beautiful." She remarked as she watched water trickle from the top of the falls through brightly colored plants of green with blue and purple flowers into the basin.

Lexa moved toward the falls keeping her hand clasped in Clarke's pulling her along with her.

"Did you see the animals?" She asked her without turning back. "Why would they display them like that?"

"So they could see them, I guess. People didn't exactly live how we live now."

Lexa's curiosity drove her toward the edge of the basin where she let go of Clarke's hand and bent down to run her fingers over the top of the water.

"It's cold." She turned to Clarke with a look of adorable surprise which caused Clarke to smile. She knelt down next to her and touched the water as she did.

"Did you look at the rocks in the other room?"

"I saw them, yes, but I heard the water so I came in here."

"They remind me of when I first arrived on earth. The radiation caused things to glow in the dark. It was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen." She watched as Lexa's eyes moved back to the falls and then return to her with a wide smile. "Until now." Clarke completed her thought and took in the look of her wife seemingly perfectly happy.

"Do you know the moment I first thought you the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen?" Lexa continued toying with the water.

"When?" Clarke asked as she stood up next to her wanting to explore more of the space before they had to return to Polaris.

"You were beautiful on our wedding day. Both of them." She corrected as she stood. "But there was a moment where you took my breath away." She turned toward her. "After you kissed me, when you moved me to the bed and I stared up at you."

"Lexa, that was four years ago."

"And you are always beautiful to me, Clarke. Every single moment I have known you, but looking up at you that day realizing what was about to happen and the look on your face as you understood it too…"

"Come on." Clarke took her hand. "You know you want to go in." She motioned with her head toward the water. "At least take off your shoes first." She pulled her back slightly.

The water wasn't very deep. The deepest it got was about a foot. Clarke watched Lexa walk into it as she sat on the edge of the water continuing to run her fingers along the top.

"Why don't you come in with me?"

"I'm good here, thanks."

"You think it's too cold." Lexa mocked.

"I think I'm enjoying what I'm doing right now just fine."

Clarke watched Lexa move to stand almost under the falls, but not quite. She put her hand out to allow the water to dance across her skin. Clarke wondered if Lexa had ever allowed herself to just enjoy nature; to immerse herself in it like this. She doubted it. So, despite her desire to return to Polaris to meet Hadia, which had somehow replaced her desire to have a longer honeymoon with her wife, she continued watching her and decided not to press her to end her exploration and contentment.

When Lexa finally returned to her and put her shoes back on, they walked back through the museum. They passed the strange yet bright rocks and gems and took a little time with each. They knew they were alone and that they could easily remove anything they wanted too, but neither even tried. They merely looked at the specimens as they were originally looked at by the museum patrons of old; inside their glass cases.

They passed the animals on display and Lexa gave Clarke the names in Trigedasleng of animals she did not know. Back near their belongings, they packed up and began the walk back to their car, which was parked nearly a mile away due to the lack of a road near what they now knew was a large museum.

_____

They drove until they hit an impasse in the road and night had fallen making it difficult to clear. They slept under the stars again that night wrapped up in one another. When morning came, they drove again. Lexa was watching Clarke as the blonde drove and eventually leaned over close to her, moving her hair off her shoulder.

"You are nervous." Lexa commented and placed her hand on top of Clarke's on the wheel.

Clarke hadn't even realized that her knuckles had tightened on the wheel as they'd gotten closer to home. She nodded in reply.

"Aren't you?" She asked back.

"Yes." Lexa replied plainly. She removed Clarke's hand from the wheel and put it to her lips to place gentle kisses there until she witnessed Clarke's other hand loosen its grip. "We can still change our mind, Clarke. I'm sure we will be able to find a family-"

Clarke turned toward her quickly stopping Lexa's words.

"No, that's not…" She hesitated finishing for a moment. "That's not what I want." She completed and Lexa nodded with a small smile and kissed another finger. "It's just that the closer we get…"

"You're getting more nervous?"

"No, I'm realizing how much I want this and how important it is." She turned to look at Lexa. "I want this, Lexa. I want a daughter with you. I want us to raise her together and I want the best future for her we can provide."

"Clarke…" It was Lexa's turn to fade.

"I didn't want to admit it before I guess or I just didn't know that I wanted it until now, but I do."

"Me too." Lexa had to admit. "I told myself before that it was for you, but it's not. I want her too, Clarke. I want all of that."

_____

She turned the key in the ignition and the engine stopped. Lexa sat still for a moment while Clarke looked out the passenger's side window.

"We will have to remove our office or we'll need to build another room." Lexa finally spoke up after they'd sat for several moments of shared silence. "She will need a bedroom."

"We should give her my art room for now."

"Clarke, no. That's-"

"I have paintings in there. They might be nice for her to look at. Maybe I can paint something for her on the wall." Clarke suggested. "We can make the other room a bedroom for her later."

"If that's what you want…"

"It is."

"Okay. Should we go put our things away and make a phone call?" Lexa asked her.

Clarke took a deep breath in and then waited a moment before letting it out.

"Yes."

_____

Abby drove a car to their house. She had Luna with her in the passenger's seat and Kane, she could see, was in the backseat. He was turned to his side though; Clarke could make out as their car pulled up next to the one they'd taken on their trip. She couldn't see what he was doing, but he appeared to be smiling and moving his hands around.

Lexa stood beside her. Their hands were tightly grasped together; both of them slightly clammy out of nervousness. They could both see Abby's smile as she put the car in park. She opened the door and walked out. She gave them each a long hug.

"I can't believe you two are doing this." She remarked, but had joy in her tone. "I never thought…"

"Just say it." Clarke implored.

"I never thought I'd be a grandparent." She smiled as she pulled away from her daughter. "Not just because of you two not being able to…" She dropped off at the sad thought. "But because I didn't know if you'd want too, but now… she's beautiful, Clarke. She's just starting to get a personality. She's at that age and she's healthy. I've run the tests. She seems happy despite what's happened to her parents."

"Sister." Luna greeted and approached Lexa. She hugged her before nodding toward Clarke. "She tried to pull my hair earlier." Luna explained of Hadia. "She laughed when I gave her my finger to play with instead." She appeared to be in support of Lexa being a parent.

It was then that Clarke saw her. She returned her hand to Lexa's and gripped it tighter than before. Kane was carrying a little blonde girl toward them with a smile on his face. Clarke watched as he pointed toward the two of them and the girl held onto him more tightly and turned her head away out of shyness before looking at them again, but cautiously.

Kane stood in front of the two of them and took his hand away from the girl, who'd been playing with it.

"Hadia, this is Clarke and this is Lexa." He introduced them to her.

They both stared at her for a long moment; Clarke taking in her green eyes and Lexa focusing on the blonde hair growing out of her head.

"Hi." Clarke finally greeted nervously.

Lexa rested her head on Clarke's shoulder in an upright position and held out her hand for the little girl to take. Hadia considered it for a moment and then wrapped a tiny hand around two of Lexa's fingers. Lexa smiled and Clarke marveled at the fact that they'd dealt with war before, but this tiny human had made them basically speechless. The little girl looked from Lexa to Luna and then back again.

"She will probably be confused about that for a while." Abby commented.

"Do you want to hold her?" Kane asked as he looked at Clarke.

"I…" She didn't know how to respond. Of course she did, but her nervousness took over for a second. "Yes." She finally answered him and he moved to hold Hadia out so Clarke could take her from him. She held her on left side since Lexa was standing on her right and they both stared at her while the child continued to play with Lexa's hand.

"Let's give them a minute." Kane suggested and walked his wife and Luna toward their house.

Neither girl said anything for a long time. Hadia seemed content trying to eat Lexa's fingers while they laughed at her. At their laughter, the girl was first caught off guard and then she smiled a somewhat toothless grin. Then, they heard her laugh at their shared laughter and Clarke looked at Lexa as if to have her confirm this was actually happening. She watched a tear trickle down to Lexa's smile and put her free hand around her back to pull her into her.

"Do you want to hold her?" She asked her eventually.

"Can I?" Lexa asked for permission.

Clarke kissed her temple.

"She's your daughter, Lexa."

Lexa met her eye with that comment. Clarke had been worried. She'd suggested they meet the girl earlier before she'd agree to make Hadia a part of their family, but this comment… this comment was everything. They had a daughter. Clarke passed Hadia over to Lexa and after several more moments, they turned to walk inside their house.

"You're going to need a crib for her." Abby stated as soon as they walked into the room.

"I've made arrangements for her crib to be brought from her old home. It should arrive shortly." Luna explained. "I felt it might make her transition easier."

"I knew her mother." Kane shared. "She would be happy with you two taking care of Hadia."

"I brought some stuff from the hospital to help you two get setup." Abby offered. "And I can stay here if you want just to help while you get used to this." She held her hand out for little Hadia to take.

Clarke smiled at her mother immediately taking to being a grandparent. She then looked around and watched Abby take Hadia from Lexa. Lexa moved to stand near her sister and they both watched the child as she played with Abby's bangs on her forehead and Abby blew little puffs of air in her face. She saw Kane smile as his wife played with their new grandchild and then her eyes went back to her own wife. Their eyes met and smiles formed. This was her family. This was everything.

_____

They watched the four-year-old blonde girl run down the marbled hallway. She stopped periodically to glance at one of the animals and ask one mother how to say the word in English before asking the other to say it in Trigedasleng. They could both say it in either language, but this was a game she played with them and they loved it. She ran further down the hall to the room with brightly lit rocks and Clarke lifted her up so she could see them up close.

"Your plan it a good one, Clarke. Now is the time for expansion as our population continues to grow." Lexa pointed out while she watched her daughter explore the rocks on her own after Clarke put her down. "We can begin repairs to buildings like this one and people can see parts of our history they've never been able too before. The port nearby will assist in transportation back and forth and the lands appear to be fertile here. This can be another city for our people to settle."

"Lexa, I love you, but today isn't about that." Clarke reminded her. She watched Hadia try to lift one of the cases off a rock with one hand while standing on the tips of her toes. "Hadia, no." Clarke scolded lightly and the girl stopped. "But yes, I think we have enough people willing to help and to move here to make it happen."  
Lexa laughed at her wife and then took her hand while the girl started running again.

"We should probably go after her." Lexa commented.

They remained slightly behind the girl who'd been more and more enjoying her independence. They made it to the room that was Lexa's favorite and due to a recent downpour, they could hear the sounds of the water falling from the rooftop before they even entered it.

"Mama!" Hadia yelled in joy and started running toward the water.

"I've got her." Lexa let go of Clarke's hand and ran after their daughter.

A few moments later, she'd removed their shoes and rolled up her pants. She took Hadia by the hand toward the falls. Lexa held out her hand to the water and was trying to get Hadia to do the same thing. Instead, the girl moved to stand under the falling water entirely and as Clarke sat on the edge of the water running her fingers on top of it, she laughed at her daughter and saw her wife doing the same as Hadia began running under the water and then back out again and again. Lexa turned toward Clarke; hearing her laughter even through the sound of the water. Clarke heard Hadia's own laughter and as Lexa met Clarke's eyes, she saw her wide, amazing smile. Lexa lifted Hadia out of the water and moved to stand under the falls so that the water would fall on both of them causing each of them to laugh while Clarke looked on. This was the most beautiful thing Clarke's eyes had ever seen.


End file.
